Title: Teacher's Pet
Directed by: James Burrows
Written by: Tom Reeder
Air Date: January 24, 1985
Previous: King of the Hill
Next: The Mail Goes to Jail
"Teacher's Pet" is the 16th episode of the third season of Cheers.
Sam is spotted carrying books into his office, closing the door, and generally acting all secretive. Diane assumes he is trying to gain some book-learning in order to win her back. What's actually happening is that Sam is studying to get a high-school diploma. It turns out that when he was a high school senior Sam got offered a contract to pitch for the Red Sox in Class A, and he accepted the contract and dropped out of school. Now he's reading "The World and Its People" as part of the geography class that he needs for the last credit to get his diploma.
Coach, inspired by Sam engaging in learning for learning's sake, and also lacking a high school diploma, joins him in the adult education class. But when Coach finds out that Sam is getting good grades because he's banging the teacher, Coach doesn't take it well.
Tropes:
- Back to School: Sam and Coach go back to high school.
- Ear Worm: "Albania... Albania... You border on the Adriatic..." The melody is based on "When the Saints Go Marching In", but Nicholas Colasanto sings it just "off" enough that it sounds distinctive enough to stand on its own. This helps In-Universe for Sam to pass the geography test.
- The Ghost: Miss Alana Purdy, the adult education geography teacher that Sam is boning. Much discussed, and Sam actually calls her from his office, but she's neither seen nor heard.
- Know-Nothing Know-It-All: Diane gets some comeuppance for her haughtiness at the end. After she was insulting about Sam not having a high school diploma, and condescending in her congratulations about him passing his geography test, she mistakenly says that the capital of North Dakota is Pierre note . Sam nails her on this and then challenges her to name the capital of Oregon. She guesses incorrectly with Portland and believes Sam when he says it's Eugene, before he laughs and tells her (correctly) that it's really Salem. Memorizing the 50 state capitals is generally part of the elementary school geography curriculum, so Diane's repeated failures on that score might be among her dumbest moments on the show.
- Rich Bitch: An element of Diane's character that is usually not that prominent really comes to the forefront in this episode, as Diane gets all snooty, expressing embarrassment that she had sex with a man who lacked a high school diploma.
- Sextra Credit: Sam is getting it from Miss Purdy. To his credit he's embarrassed, saying that he hadn't even asked for it and only noticed when Miss Purdy started writing things like "close enough" on his tests.
- Shown Their Work: Everything mentioned about Albania in Coach's song is accurate as of the time the episode aired. More than one of the writers would later recollect poring through an encyclopedia to learn facts about Albania which they could then write into a song.
- Teacher/Student Romance: Sam is dating the geography teacher. Coach, who has earned his grades through hard work, is upset.
