Title: Truce or Consequences
Directed by: James Burrows
Written by: Ken Levine and David Isaacs
Air Date: November 18, 1982
Previous: Friends, Romans, Accountants
Next: Coach Returns to Action
Guest Starring: John Ratzenberger
"Truce or Consequences" is the eighth episode of the first season of Cheers.
Carla and Diane's constant sniping has grown into non-stop fighting. Sam, at wit's end when it comes to making his waitresses get along, orders them to spend some time together after work. They wind up sitting at a table at Cheers at closing time, but Diane's snootiness and condescension even when she's trying to make friends drives Carla to tell a ridiculous lie: that Sam is the father of her youngest child, Gino.
Just like Carla figured, Diane spills the beans in less than a day, only to be humiliated when she finds out that Sam is not Gino's father. Carla and Diane have their nastiest fight ever, until Sam finally brings them together.
- Aw, Look! They Really Do Love Each Other: Diane and Carla, in the ending sequence. After they share a BIG laugh (with Sam) over the episode's events (involving a lie Carla had told Diane during a prior attempt to "reach out" to each other), the two women have a warm exchange that points towards a legitimate friendship beneath all the surface volatility.Carla: Hey, look, uh, Whitey—I'm sorry. I know I can be a real pain, sometimes....
Diane: And I know, that—I take things a little too seriously, at times. I guess I need to be reminded of that.
Carla: Well—I'll always be there for ya! [Pats Diane on the back]
Sam: Listen—I want you two to, uh...shake hands.
[They do. Pause]
Carla: [Hesitates; shrugs] You're all right. [Beat] Hey—maybe we can go to a movie, one night!
Diane: Fine! When?
Carla: [Beat] I'll get back to ya....
- Big "SHUT UP!": Sam screams "BE QUIET!" when Carla and Diane are screaming at each other in the third act after Diane found out Carla's trick.
- Condescending Compassion: Diane acts like this with Carla in their first talk, which is why Carla told the ridiculous lie. Diane pretty much had it coming after saying stuff like "Benefit from my depth" when talking with Carla.
- Gargle Blaster: Carla mixes one called "Leap Into an Open Grave" for her and Diane for their night-long heart-to-heart. When Carla gives a shocking "reveal" that Sam is the father of her youngest kid, poor Diane grabs the pitcher and chugs it down to calm herself, with Carla looking on wide-eyed:
- Diane: [Distraught] Carla, I don't believe this.
Carla: Me neither. You're gonna die!
- Hangover Sensitivity: Diane comes into the bar the next day really really hurting after spending the previous night getting trashed on Carla's Gargle Blaster cocktail.
- I Need a Freaking Drink: Diane pounds Carla's cocktail after finding out that Sam is the mother of Carla's youngest (he isn't). Carla is only too happy to pour more.
- Secret Test of Character: Carla's absurd lie is really a test to see if Diane can keep a secret. Diane spectacularly fails.
- Unreveal Angle: All Sam has to do to disabuse Diane of the idea that he is Gino's father is to...show Diane a picture of Gino. All three of them start howling with laughter. When Carla shows Diane a picture of Gino's real father, they all start laughing even harder. We never see either picture.