Title: Stakeout
Directed by: John Rich
Written by: Danny Arnold
Air Date: February 27, 1975
Previous: The Courtesans
Next: Bureaucrat
Guest Starring: Lou Jacobi, Vic Tayback, Eddie Barth, Brett Somers, Florence Stanley
"Stakeout" is the sixth episode of the first season of Barney Miller.
A Detective DeLuca comes to the 12th with news of a heroin-smuggling ring operating in the precinct. Barney, Fish, and DeLuca will take vigil in an empty apartment across the street from where the heroin smugglers are believed to be making a drop. Wojciehowicz gets all whiny when Barney tells him to stay behind and man the phones, until Barney caves and lets him go along.
The detectives take up station in the empty, unfurnished apartment. Barney hopes to keep it a secret, but the superintendent (Vic Tayback, who not long after this would be a regular on Alice), tells his wife, and soon half the building is cycling through as the detectives try to keep a watch for the heroin smugglers. Plus, Fish is dealing with personal problems: that very morning, he told Bernice, his wife of 36 years, that he wants a divorce.
First appearance of Florence Staley as Bernice Fish. She would be an occasional guest star and eventually co-starred with Vigoda on the spinoff Fish.
Tropes:
- Artistic License – Martial Arts: Wojo, who in the early seasons was the resident meathead, has decided that police officers need to learn karate. So he comes charging into the squad room in a white robe, chopping with his hands, dramatically kicking and yelling, fake-karate style.
- Brick Joke: Barney has been complaining about needing a shower because he can't take one at home (Liz is having the bathroom remodeled). Meanwhile Mr. Tannenbaum, who owns the frequently burgled convenience store across the street, insists on rigging up a goofy-looking burglar alarm in the apartment that he can ring if he's robbed again. These two jokes come together at the end when the goofy burglar alarm goes off, and Barney, wearing only a towel, has to go charging out of the apartment to save Mr. Tannenbaum.
- Cannot Keep a Secret: Barney tells Mr. Stavochek, the superintendent, not to tell anyone that the cops are there. Naturally Mr. Stavochek tells his wife who tells most of the rest of the building.
- *Crack!* "Oh, My Back!": Fish sleeps perched on the folding chairs because he doesn't want to go home to Bernice. In the morning he's bent over double at the waist.
- Early-Installment Weirdness: One of five episodes in the first half-season of Barney Miller (it was a Midseason Replacement and aired only 13 episodes) that showed scenes outside of the squad room. There would only be eight more over the remaining seven seasons of the show.
- Five-Finger Discount: Fish is booking an old lady for shoplifting. When he says she was seen stealing stuff on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday, and asks for her statement, she says "I don't shop on weekends."
- Immediate Self-Contradiction: Mrs. Stavochek says "I'm not a talker" when Barney asks her not to tell anybody about them. Then she immediately tells Barney that she knows a highly placed city official who has a mistress and a 30-year-old son who still sucks his thumb.
- Mistaken for Gay: When Barney and Fish show up to scope out the apartment, Mr. Stavochek says "You boys been living together long?"
- The Stakeout: The detectives of the 12th Precinct stake out a location believed to be used by a heroin-smuggling ring.
