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Film — Live-Action TV

Aurelio: The owner of the car, you kill him or what?
Iosef: No. We fucked up his dog, though!

"It was just a fuckin'—!"

Live-Action TV

"I've gotta learn to just do the damage and leave town. It's the 'stay-and-gloat' that gets me every time."
Ethan Rayne, Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Chief Constable Giles Why are these men in here, Crabtree? What common trait do they hold?
George Crabtree: Poor judgment.
Giles: And what constitutes poor judgment?
Crabtree: Rashness, I suppose. A tendency to act without regarding consequence.
Giles: Or is it the inability to imagine the series of events that led them to their present circumstance and correctly assess its probability? Stupidity, Crabtree. Thought-stunting, bat-blind stupidity is the sine qua non of incarceration.
Murdoch Mysteries, "Nolo Contendre"
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In Hard Rain, there is a bad guy (Morgan Freeman) who has a choice. He wants to steal some money, but all during the film I kept wondering why he didn't just give up and head for dry ground. How much of this ordeal was he foolish enough to put up with? Water, cold, rain, electrocutions, murders, shotguns, jet-ski attacks, drownings, betrayals, collisions, leaky boats, stupid and incompetent partners, and your fingertips shrivel up. Is it worth it?

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Video Game

"You had it made! You could have been the biggest thief of all time, but you had to target my ancestors and blow your own cover. You exposed your operation because of your ego!"

Hau: So, uh, Mr. Faba, do you have the key to the president's rooms?
Faba: Indeed! I have it right here.
Hau: So... if you'd just stayed hidden, we would've been stuck here anyway, right?
Faba: What?!

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Webcomics

"And so apparently the world was once again saved due to the villains being totally incompetent. Now onto weather..."
Television set, being watched by Dan's Author Avatar in the El Goonish Shive strip Too Tired to Care

Web Animation

"Kane and Lynch are arrested by the army and are taken through the city center in a convoy of helicopters rather than in, say, one car. So they hijack their helicopter and immediately begin strafing nearby skyscrapers, where all the office workers apparently stash rocket launchers in the water coolers. Then they crash on the building that just happens to contain the big boss they've made an enemy of...The Chinese Army helicopters then continue strafing the building, apparently because Kane and Lynch made it look like so much fun, which would be difficult to explain to your boss even if said boss wasn't currently in the building, alone, unguarded, and making no effort to evacuate the building that is under direct aerial assault. Not the sort of thing that's going to look good on the quarterly employee evaluation, is it?"
Zero Punctuation on Kane & Lynch 2: Dog Days

Web Original

Why would Jev suddenly decide to physically attack Troi when he has gotten away with his mental rape for so long? It is because this is a standalone episode of Star Trek and it needs to be wrapped up within 45 minutes. So Jev needs to make a mistake so they can catch and condemn him. It might have been far more disturbing if he had gotten away with it. Had the crew never found out which of Ullyans was responsible and only we knew. How the plot tidies up all of this a little too neat.

Rourke isn’t all that menacing, his character comes up with stupid plans, he has no real problem solving abilities, and he can’t learn to shut up and shoot his targets. Now that may be the point... that he believes he is the best but is utterly incompetent but I highly doubt that. Every fed/mob character try to play him up as the next Anton Chigurh and yet every one of his plans go completely tits up on him.

Chris: Magneto is super surprised that all the army guys are kitted out with plastic weapons, as though there was not a dude beating him with a plastic nightstick in the last movie. It’s almost like Ratner and the writers never actually saw X-Men 1 or 2, and just had someone describe it to them. Over the phone. While driving through a tunnel.
Matt: McKellen looks like Bela Lugosi in an Ed Wood movie in these shots.
—Chris Sims and David Uzumeri on X-Men: The Last Stand

Uther Pendragon, the king, has persecuted the sorcerers out of Camelot, and burns any he finds still within his borders. This doesn’t stop him trusting various random strangers who turn up wearing long magician-robes and long magician-beards, carrying magicky-looking staffs covered in runes and zodiacal symbols… because he’s a doofus.

I’m starting to feel bad for Thanos, to be honest. He has a nice smile, a neat-looking gold suit and a comfortable-looking space chair, but other than that, I don’t think he has a lot going for him. He’s not that handsome, smile aside, and everyone seems to hate him. Even when he pays to have people be friends with him, like Ronan the Accuser, those people wind up betraying him, too. All Thanos wants is love. (And maybe he should stop spending time with people known as 'The Accuser,' who sound very judgmental.)
Mike Ryan, "Thanos is Really Bad at Being a Supervillain"

Web Video

"I don't really think he thought this one all the way through. Here's another tip: When your archnemesis is named 'The Beastmaster,' don't challenge him to a fight IN A FUCKIN' ZOO."

Ru'afo: He's no threat.
Plinkett: [watching] Uhhh, hey, Ru'afo, remember the beginning of the movie? The android has been nothing but the biggest problem to you ever.

"He killed an entire club's worth of people earlier, with not one of them getting away. And now Joey's stumbling around like an idiot and he can't even get her! Come on, Pinhead! But maybe that's because he's using electrified water and explosions instead of the very effective hooks on chains."

"Ritter goes off to start a fire and smoke out Chris, and it's a good plan; I'm sure it'll fuck up somehow."

Slimecicle: WE JUST DID A FUCKING BOSS FIGHT WITH YOU, AND YOU HAD A GLOCK THE ENTIRE TIME AND DIDN'T THINK TO USE IT?!
Condification: YOU COULD HAVE JUST SHOT US!
Slimecicle, to Fallen Grizzly during the climax of The HARDEST Minecraft Difficulty

Real Life

One would have had to look a long time to find a man more barren of ideas than Sir Oswald Mosley. He was as hollow as a jug. Even the elementary fact that Fascism must not offend national sentiment had escaped him. His entire movement was imitated slavishly from abroad, the uniform and the party programme from Italy and the salute from Germany, with the Jew-baiting tacked on as an afterthought, Mosley having actually started his movement with Jews among his most prominent followers.

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