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Lamp: It's dangerous to go alone, take this.
Player: Take what? You didn't give me anything.
Lamp: Oh, I was just telling a joke! I'm Lamp, the town comedian!
Player: That's not a joke. You're just repeating things you've heard and calling them jokes.
Lamp: It gets a laugh like, a third of the time, though...

Lamp: Do a barrel roll! Haha!
Player: Are you talking to me?
Lamp: You bet! All your laughs are belong to me!
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Player: I bet half the people playing are too young for that one.

Lamp: Can this wait? I'm in the middle of some calibrations.
Player: Your 'material' really needs work.
Lamp: Well excuuuuuuuuse me, Player!

Lamp: Hey did you hear about the cake?
Player: What cake?
Lamp: Yeah, the cake
Player: Oh no. No.
Lamp: Is
Player: Don't.
Lamp: A lie! Hahahaha!
Player: I hate you so much.

Lamp: Shut down everything! A winner is you. What a horrible night to have a curse.
Player: What? Now you're not even making sense!
Lamp: Hey, I never asked for this.
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