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Quotes / Took the Bad Film Seriously

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Well, you either take the job or you don't — but never take the job only to then not do the job.
Kevin McNallynote 

"You used to be able to depend on a bad film being poorly made. No longer. "The Punisher: War Zone" is one of the best-made bad movies I've seen. It looks great, it hurtles through its paces and is well-acted. The soundtrack is like elevator music if the elevator were in a death plunge. The special effects are state of the art. Its only flaw is that it's disgusting."

"You have not lived until you've seen Martin Landau disco. Well, perhaps you have. He is both miscast and misdirected, and seems to labor under the misapprehension that his role should be taken seriously."
Roger Ebert on B.A.P.S. (1997)

It is always said of (Patrick) Stewart that his strength as an actor is his ability to deliver bad dialogue with utter conviction. I say it is time to stop encouraging him. Here's an idea: Instead of giving him bad dialogue, why not give him good dialogue, and see what he can do with that?

"Still, it says a great deal about Christopher Lee as a performer that Scaramanga remains on of the most iconic Bond baddies, despite being associated with what is generally argued to be the worst book, and what is also a contender for the worst film. The actor is given a chance to play a bit against type, and he relishes it. Unlike Michael Lonsdale who seemed to give up on reading his script, Lee instead develops a character around that script."

Toub, who's playing the uncle of Dev Patel's tormented Prince Zuko, is the real tragic hero of this movie, as you watch him struggle to cling to his dignity as everyone around him drowns in narrative sewage.
Charlie Jane Anders review on Shaun Toub, The Last Airbender

"(John) Candy, for the few precious scenes in which he legitimately appears (and isn't being dopplegangered by computers or a stunt double), is depressingly good, like a rare form of terminal cancer that gives you the power of flight and makes everything taste like cake. He is able to rise above material that, at its best, is the antithesis of laughter, and somehow manages to be completely watchable and occasionally funny in a movie that is the comedic equivalent of stabbing a weeping hobo to death in an abandoned boxcar."

Det. Magnotta (Christopher Walken): ...You don't have a clue, do you? You're not smart enough to be a suspect. This a genius. It took him years to perfect it. Now he's gonna savor it. It's not just the killing he's into; he's into power. The intimacy of goin' inside, where the heart still pumps; he's into feelin' the skin tighten like a canvas and the warm blood spraying, leaving masterpieces for us to marvel at. And he's gonna go on and on, creating masterpieces, unless I stop him. Because I know what drives him to it. So don't you dare think you understand a killer—or me.
Spoony: (applauding) Ohh, you gotta give it up for Walken, c'mon! Give it up! Chistopher Walken, everyone!

Of all the real actors playing the cartoon characters, the only one I felt did a decent job was Rene Russo as Natasha. I say that and she is the only actor to get a Razzie nom... DeNiro is just kind of in this movie and doesn’t contribute much besides embarrassment.
Miles Antwiler on The Adventures of Rocky & Bullwinkle (2000)

Don't try to class this movie up, lady. It's not worth it.

You know, Sam, you almost made that stupid line work. But you didn't, you still had to say the words "mutant French poodle". But it was a good try.

Once we meet a bad guy who’s exactly how Nolan’s Batman films would portray the Riddler, we glance down to find our cinema seats have morphed into coconut mats, whizzing on a rapid, spiraling descent into spectacular dumbness. It’s all so gloriously and unexpectedly stupid, like Zodiac penned by someone who fended off middle-act writer’s block by hoovering a load of PCP into their lungs. The only way to watch is to revel in the bizarre combination of massive craziness and powerhouse acting, from two leads who were quite clearly cast by accident, instead of the material’s rightful players, Nic Cage and a sweaty John Cusack.

Chris: The destruction of the bar is almost impossible to care about because it was pretty janky to begin with, but the bright shining moment is Udo Kier, pawing at a chainlink fence and selling it like he’s watching someone murder a child while this squealing In The Heat of the Night guitar riff plays underneath him.
Matt: It’s like he’s making up for Pamela Anderson’s non-acting with DOUBLE ACTING.
Chris: He’d have to ratchet things up to quintuple acting if he wanted to balance her out.
Matt: Not even the Kier can shoulder that load.
—Chris Sims and Matt Wilson on Barb Wire

And in a twist of fate that I can only call miraculous, Matt Leblanc is not that bad of an actor. I used to think he was Godawful in this film. Really, when I first saw it I thought he was the worst thing in the movie. But as I've aged I've began to notice subtle nuances in filmmaking. And looking at it again with fresh eyes some 12 years later, I have come to the conclusion that it's not him — it's the script. Watch this guy and tell me he's not trying. He's trying hard. But the script makes him out to be a total horny asshat who can only spout one-liners. I mean, he hits on his boss's daughter RIGHT IN FUCKING FRONT OF HIM!!!

Kirk asks how they’ll get past the Great Barrier, and Sybok says that God gave him a vision, and is waiting for them on the other side. This merely convinces Kirk that Sybok is 'mad'...Laurence Luckinbill actually plays this really well: Doubt crosses his face, and while looking at Kirk he asks himself, almost genuinely, 'Am I?' Then, not with confidence but with visible faith, he answers himself with a smile: 'We’ll see.' Not a lot of actors would have played it that way, so well done.

What troubles me about Jon Pertwee’s performance in this story (aside from the alarming sexism which seems to stem naturally from the actor) is how he seems to be the only actor taking this whole story seriously. Nick Courtney, John Levene and Katy Manning cannot exactly be blamed for having a laugh riot with their hackneyed characterisation but Pertwee marches on, staring into the camera and delivering his speeches as though he is on stage and delivering the most powerful of Shakespeare soliloquies

Y'know, you don't have to try so hard. You could just half-ass this performance and get paid the same. Just sayin'.
Allison Pregler on a bit part actor from Baywatch

There’s also a really, really nice line delivery from (John) Glover right before this where Tess asks him if Lex is worth killing over, and he tells her 'Lex is worth anything,' as though he’s trying to tell her why people drink water or breathe air. It’s a really amazing piece of acting, especially from a guy who just had to spout off a paragraph of exposition so sloppy that it actually started with the words 'As you know, Tess.'
ComicsAlliance on Smallville ("Finale")

Q: Is there anything good about the Wonder Woman pilot?
A: Adrianne Palicki. People might not have liked the way WW was portrayed, but Palicki did the best job she could with it. She was tough, funny, charming, and appropriately badass, all when she needed to be. As a successor to Lynda Carter's Wonder Woman, I'd say she filled the corset admirably.
Q: That's it?
A: Oh! And they made Wonder Woman look tall.

Dillane did a great job with what he was given. Seriously. Even if how we got to “Go on, do your duty” was rubbish, the delivery of that line, man, perfect. All the way through he killed it with the reaction shots and micro-expressions. It’s such a shame.'
Turtle-Paced in answer to this ask about Stephen Dillane in Game of Thrones

Joey: It is so amazing to meet you. I'm such a big fan of your work.
Lennart: Well, I've been blessed with a lot of great roles.
Joey: Tell me about it! "Unlimited nights and weekends!"
Lennart: ...Are you making fun of me? Because I am not a sell-out. I didn't do that for the money, I believe in those phones! I almost lost a cousin because of bad wireless service!
Joey: No, I-I-I wasn't making fun of you, honestly, I-I think you were great in those commercials.
Lennart: Really?
Joey: Yeah.
Lennart: Well, I do bring a certain credibility to the role.
Joey: Are you kiddin'? When they shoot you out of that cannon…
Lennart: Pchooo! "Hang up that phone!" ...One take!
Friends, "The One With The Mugging"

"Programmed rather than plotted, Street Fighter is notable only for being the last film made by Raúl Juliá, an actor far too skilled for the demands of the evil warlord, Gen. M. Bison, but far too professional to give anything less than his best."
Richard Harrington

"He is unapologetically just going for it in this role; he may as well be playing Raiden again!"

Interviewer: In your career, what is a performance you’ve given, something that you’re insanely proud of, that you’re so glad to have been a part of, that you feel maybe not enough people know about, that’s not appreciated as well as it should be?
Ryan Gosling: [without missing a beat] My work on Young Hercules.
Interviewer: Really?!
Ryan Gosling: I had a fake tan, leather pants, I was fighting imaginary monsters — they weren’t really there, but I was acting like they were there.


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