"You have spent your entire life in the dark. Your eyes closed to the new hotness that awaits. The promised land. A utopia of light beyond your wildest dreams. It is all that and a bag of cool beans."
— Telephone, Splatoon 2: Octo Expansion
My mother once told me of a place with waterfalls and unicorns flying
Where there was no suffering, no pain, where there was laughter instead of dying
I always thought she’d made it up to comfort me in times of pain
But now I know that place is real, now I know its name
Sal Tlay Ka Siti, not just a story mama told
But a village in Ooh-tah, where the roofs are thatched with gold
If I could let myself believe, I know just where I’d be –
Right on the next bus to paradise: Sal Tlay Ka Siti
I can imagine what it must be like...this perfect, happy place:
I’ll bet the goat meat there is plentiful, and they have vitamin injections by the case
The warlords there are friendly, they help you cross the street
And there’s a Red Cross on every corner with all the flour you can eat!
Sal Tlay Ka Siti, the most perfect place on Earth
Where flies don’t bite your eyeballs and human life has worth
It isn’t a place of fairy tales, it’s as real as it can be
A land where evil doesn’t exist: Sal Tlay Ka Siti
And I’ll bet the people are open-minded and don’t care who you’ve been
And all I hope is that when I find it, I’m able to fit in...
Will I fit in?
Sal Tlay Ka Siti, a land of hope and joy
And if I want to get there, I just have to follow that white boy
You were right, mama, you didn’t lie –
The place is real, and I’m gonna fly!
I’m on my way...soon life won’t be so shitty
Now salvation has a name: Sal Tlay Ka Siti
My kin... do not come before me abject. Raise your proud and terrible heads. I will find you another world. A better world, where angels fear to tread and man is a cautionary tale.
The promised land, our home, Elysia.
