Follow TV Tropes


Quotes / Super Drowning Skills

Go To

"This guy can go all over fighting hordes of evil monsters... but he can't even fucking swim!?"

What the fuck, this girl's got tits! S-she can't float?

— The infamous Sonic the Hedgehog drowning countdown

Danny: WHOOPS! (laughing hysterically) Did you just fucking drown immediately from going into knee-deep water?!
Arin: A hundred rings, gone!
Danny: That is the only real threat you've had this entire game! A POND!
Arin: "Let me check the temperature of the water real quick - ABRBLRLBRLBR!!"

How is Indiana Jones such a wimp that he can't set foot in water more shallow than a kiddie pool?

Finally, a hero in a sandbox game that can justify the fact that he can't swim
Ben "Yahtzee" Crowshaw reviews Infamous (text in the end credits)

Not in this game, Swimmer Dan! In this game, you drown.

I'm a Warrior Hero Adventurer Goddess who CAN'T SWIM, OKAY?!
Skye of the Skittles promotional video game Darkened Skye

If only we had some minions who could swim... or float... or not drown quite so quickly...

Minions can't swim, Master, but they are remarkably good at drowning.

Don’t you know that you never learn to swim until the sequel?
Comic Book Guy, The Simpsons Game

Water: My arch nemesis!

Oh, that's just great! I can run at supersonic speeds but I can't even get out of a kid's swimming pool? What the hell has Sonic Team been smoking all these years?

You obviously haven't seen turians swim. It's a lot of flailing and splashing interrupted by occasional bouts of drowning.
Garrus Vakarian, Mass Effect 3

They're turtles, for fuck's sake! They can't even swim!?

Bomberman can't swim!
Pommy hanging a lampshade on Bomberman's Super Drowning Skills, Bomberman 64: The Second Attack

Seine: The sea and I have a mutual disliking.
Sonic: Ah, okay.
Sonic: Why?
Seine: It keeps trying to drown me, the bugger.
Sonic: Oh, I know how ya feel. I just sink right to the bottom.
(Sonic looks annoyed.)
Seine: Least you can swim your way out, right?
Sonic: Nnnnnope.
Seine: Ouch. Similar deal. I can swim, in theory, but anything above my head...
(Seine does a rock-sinking motion.)
Sonic: Yup. Story o' my life when it comes to water.
Seine: Damn. Well, thank goodness for the solid land here.
— Two protagonists talking about a characteristic they share, We Are Our Avatars

Kirby: So where do we go from here? Do we just swim?
Sonic: I can't swim! I need my floatie- er, I mean, a flotation device.
Ganondorf: You don't need a flotation device when you're underwater.
Sonic: ...I don't like him. He keeps outwitting me.
Super Paper Mario X, Chapter 19

Mystery Quest

"On a beach, I'm surrounded by water, which will either kill me instantly or trap me at the bottom and kill me slowly. Pass!"
Sonic, Sonic F

A landlubber!! So helpless that he could drown in his own bathtub.

Don't fall, Agent 3! You know we sea creatures can't swim! (Heh heh...)
Cap'n Cuttlefish, Splatoon

I see that John has the same weakness as the Uragaan from Monster Hunter. Except in John's case, it means instant death.

"You ought to be convinced by now that Archimedes' principle doesn't apply, so far as I am concerned."
Coughing and blowing her nose, Mother started for the beach.
"I still don't understand it," Dad muttered. "She's right. It completely refutes Archimedes."


How well does it match the trope?

Example of:


Media sources: