Various quotes and lyrical excerpts from Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse.
All spoilers are unmarked!
Stan Lee: It always fits... eventually.note
Miles: With great power comes great...
Peter B.: Dont you dare finish that sentence. Dont do it! Im sick of it. (glitches) Want my advice? Go back to being a regular kid.
Miles: I don't have a choice. Kingpins got a supercollider. Hes trying to kill me.
Peter B.: Wait a second, what did you just say?
Miles: Kingpins trying to kill me.
Peter B.: Who cares about that? Wheres the collider?
Miles: Brooklyn. Under Fisk Tower.
Peter B.: Goodbye! [...]
Peter B.: When it runs again, Ill just jump in and get back to my life—
Miles: You cant let them run it. Im supposed to destroy it so it never runs again or everyones gonna die—
Peter B.: —Or everyones going to die. That is what they always say. But theres always a little bit of time before everybody dies, and thats when I do my best work.
Peter B. Oh, you have a goober. (Holds up his hand) Give it.
Miles Wh-whoa wait, no, not so fast... He called it an override key.
Peter B. There's always an bypass key, a virus key, a who-cares key I can never remember, so I just call it a goober. Give it.
-> Miles: Look, if I dont turn off the collider after you leave, everyone in this city, my parents, my uncle, and millions of others will die, and youre just gonna go home and leave me here to figure this out for myself? You good with that, Spider-Man?
Peter B.: Yeah. (walks away, as Miles sits dejected and sad. Peter then turns back) What are you doing?
Miles: Making you feel guilty. Is it working?
Peter B. How could it, no— Look at me, does it look like its working? No its.. no its... ohhhh... (yells into his arm) Ahhh!!! No! No! No-no-no! Do not let him win! (normally) Alright kid, you win. Cmon, we dont have a second to lose.
Spider-Man Noir: Hey fellas.
Miles: Is he in black and white?
Peter B.: Where's that wind coming from? We're in a basement.
Spider-Man Noir: Where I go, the wind follows... and the wind? It smells like rain.
Peni: Hey guys! (Jumps down and poses) Konichiwa! Hajimemashite, yoroshiku!
(SP//dr lands behind her)
Peter B.: This could literally not get any weirder.
(Spider-Ham strolls right up to him)
Miles: Well, I, I havent actually fought anyone—
Spider-Man Noir: Surprise attack! (knocks down Miles)
Peni Parker: Can you re-wire a mainframe while being shot at?
Miles: Can I what?
Peni Parker: Show me!
Spider-Man Noir: Surprise attack!
Spider-Gwen: Can you swing and flip with the grace of a trained dancer?
Spider-Man Noir: Can you close off your feelings so you dont get crippled by the moral ambiguity of your violent actions?
Aunt May: Can you help your aunt create an online dating profile so she can get out of the dang house once in a while?
Spider-Ham: Can you float through the air when you smell a delicious pie?
Spider-Gwen: Can you be strong?
Peni Parker: Ruthless?
Miles: I dont know, maybe—
Peni Parker: Psychic?
Spider-Man Noir: Show me some moxie, soldier!
Spider-Gwen: Above all, no matter how many times you get hit, can you get back up?
Spider-Man Noir: Because when a Spider-Man is on the floor—
Spider-Gwen: —when you think you've given your all—
Spider-Ham: —when you think you can't keep going—
Spider-Man Noir: —Spider-Man always gets up.
Dr. Olivia: Doctor Olivia Octavius.
Peter B. Parker: Can I assume that your friends call you Doc Ock?
Dr. Olivia: My friends actually call me "Liv." My enemies call me "Doc Ock."
Spider-Ham: You got a problem with cartoons?
My name is Peter Parker. I was bitten by a radioactive spider, and for 10 years, I've been the one and only Spider-Man.
I'm pretty sure you know the rest.
Ben Parker: With great power, comes great responsibility.
I saved a bunch of people, fell in love, saved the city. And then I saved the city again. And again and again and again.
And I did, uh... I did this.
♬ Get on up... ♬
We don't really talk about this.
Look, I'm a comic book, I'm a cereal, did a Christmas album. I have an excellent theme song...
♬ Spider-Man, Spider-Man ♬
...and a so-so popsicle. (Beat) I mean, I've looked worse.
But after everything, I still love being Spider-Man. I mean, who wouldn't? So no matter how many hits I take, I always find a way to come back. Because the only thing standing between this city and oblivion is me. There's only one Spider-Man... and you're looking at him.
My name is Peter B. Parker. I was bitten by a radioactive spider, and for the last 22 years, I thought I was the one and only Spider-Man.
What a day...
I'm pretty sure you know the rest. You see, I saved the city, fell in love, I got married, saved the city some more, maybe too much. My marriage got testy, made some dicey money-choices - don't invest in a Spider-themed restaurant.
Then like 15 years passed, blah, blah, blah, super boring. I broke my back, a drone flew into my face, I buried Aunt May, my wife and I... split up.
But I handled it like a champion.
Uh, uh, uh...
'Cause you know what, no matter how many times I get hit, I always get back up. And I got a lot of time to reflect and work on myself. Did you know that seahorses, that they mate for life? Can you imagine? A seahorse, seeing another seahorse, and then making it work?
She wanted kids, and... and it scared me. I'm pretty sure I broke her heart.
Flash-forward: I'm in my apartment, doing push-ups, doing ab-crunches, getting strong, when this weird thing happened. And I gotta say, weird things happen to me a lot... but this was real weird.
You see, I was in New York, but things were different. Also, I was dead. And blonde. I was kind of... perfect. It was like looking in a mirror.
I have a feeling that the thing that brought me here was the thing that got him killed.
You wanna know what happened next?
Peter B.: Hey, kid-(zapped) Agh!
Miles: Who are you?
My name is Gwen Stacy. I was bitten by a radioactive spider, and for the last two years, I've been the one and only Spider-Woman.
You guys know the rest. I joined a band, saved my dad. I... couldn't save my best friend, Peter Parker. So, now I save everyone else. And I don't do friends anymore... just to avoid any distractions. And one day this weird thing happened. And I mean, like, really weird.
I was blown into last week. Literally. I landed in New York, but not my New York.
My Spider-Sense told me to head to Visions Academy. Wasn't sure why, until I met... you.
Miles: I like your haircut?
Gwen: You don't get to like my haircut.
Peni: My name is Peni Parker.
Spider-Ham: My name is Peter Porker.
Noir, Peni, and Spider-Ham: I was bitten by a radioactive...
Noir and Peni: ...spider.
Noir: In my universe, it's 1933, and I'm a private eye. I like to drink egg creams, and I like to fight Nazis. A lot.
Peni: I'm from New York in the year 3145. I have a psychic link with a spider who lives inside my father's robot. And we're best friends! Forever!
Noir: Sometimes I let matches burn down to my fingertips just to feel something, anything.
Spider-Ham: I'm a photographer for The Daily Beagle. When I'm not pooching around, I'm working like a dog, trying to sniff out the latest story. I frolic and I dance and I do this with my pants and
Peter B.: Okay! Enough! So how did you get here?
Noir: Well, it's kind of a long story.
(Cut to a short bit of Peni, Noir, and Spider-Ham arriving in New York.)
Noir: Maybe not that long.
My name is Miles Morales. I was bitten by a radioactive spider, and for the last, like, two days, I've been the one and only Spider-Man.
I think you know the rest. I finished my essay, saved a bunch of people, got hit by a drone. I did this with my dad. Met my roommate, finally.
Slapped a sticker where my dad's never gonna find it.
And when I feel alone, like no one understands what I'm going through, I remember my friends who get it.
I never thought I'd be able to do any of this stuff, but... I can. Anyone can wear the mask. You could wear the mask. If you didn't know that before, I hope you do now. 'Cause I'm Spider-Man. And I'm not the only one. Not by a long shot.
♬ Needless to say, I keep her in check ♬
♬ She was all bad-bad, nevertheless ♬
♬ Callin' it quits, yeah, baby, I'm a wreck ♬
Gwen: Miles... Miles! You got a minute?
A Very Spidey Christmas Album
Ch-check it out!
Joy to the world
that I just saved!
I'm always on the clock,
vanquishing Doc Ock,
and then away I swing,
and then away I swing,
and then away, away I swing!
Ah, ch-check it-
Check it out!
Joy to the world
I keep saving!
I saved you all again,
this time from the Kingpin,
And literally I don't get paid,
Kinda weird that I don't get paid,
I make my own web-fluid and it's not free, okay?!
No more villains
I'll keep a watchful eye,
I'm just that kinda guy!
I am the Spider-Man,
I am your Spider-Man,
I'm your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man!
www.gofundme.com/spideywebfluidfund! Help me get to $1,000, thank you!
Swinging through Midtown!
Oh, what fun to sling a web
and take the bad guys down!
Thwipping all the time!
Oh what fun to swing around
New York while fighting crime!
Thwipping through the streets,
of New York every night,
wrapping bad guys up,
in my web so tight!
Crawling up the walls,
making villains fight,
what fun to make the holidays
free from crime tonight!
Oh, Spider-bells, Goblin smells,
Vulture laid an egg!
Spider-buggy blew a tire,
and Venom got away, hey!
Swinging all the way!
Oh what fun it is to fight
the bad guys every night!
Swinging through the streets,
a web of spider-silk,
kicking all the butts
of villains and their ilk!
Bombs from Goblins fling (fling!),
pumpkins booming bright (bright!),
how hard it is to consistently bring
peace to New York all night!
Oh, Spidey-bells, might be swell
to do more than fight crime!
I got a lot of qualities
that don't get much air-time! Uh,
I sing, I can dance...
I tell jokes, I act...
I can... be a big deal,
if my agent calls me back...
Why... did I agree...
To do this stupid song?
I have a degree...
In chemical engineering...
I thought it would be fun...
To show this side of me...
But now I fear it lacks...
Oh, Spidey-bells, Spidey-bells...
... Is this who I've become?
Selling out my good name
for an impulse buy album...?
Oh, Spidey-bells... Spidey-bells...
I'm filled with deep regret...
I'm cancelling this song's release,
before depressed... I... get...
... OH, SPIDEY-BELLS, SPIDEY-BELLS,
SWINGING THROUGH MIDTOWN!
OH WHAT FUN TO SLING A WEB
AND TAKE THE BAD GUYS...
Oh, we're recording? Uh, hello friends, hope you're havin' a great holiday season, I know I am... Y'know this song is very dear to my heart; I'm sure you'll recognize it, but the lyrics are not very good, so... we fixed that!
Deck the hall with bound-up villains,
'Tis the season to save millions,
Don we now our super-slick
form-fitting <unintelligible>, fa-la-la-la!
Troll the heck out of the Prowler,
Jimmy, just keep it goin' a little. Just keep ticklin' those keys, I'm gonna do a little crowd work...
Hey everybody! Anybody here have I saved? Have I saved anybody here? Raise your hand if I've saved you... Nobody? Anybody... know anybody I've saved; raise your hand? No? Great, well that's my point - we all have to save each other, am I right? Especially in these holiday seasons... Save us from the eggnog! I tease. Jimmy, let's get back into it, this is a dead room.
See the blazing Firestar before us
Along with Silk from the Spider-Friends chorus
Follow me in amazing measure
Fa-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la!
Save the Beetle's power-boosted treasure
How you guys doin', you havin' fun? Oh, I'm havin' a great time too. Just been swingin' around, savin' lives; doin' what I do... Ladies and gentlemen, a dear friend of mine is here! She's not gonna sing, and she doesn't know I'm about to do this - but Mary Jane Parker, everybody! Round of applause!
... Really not happy about that, okay. Promised I wouldn't do it... Got caught up in the moment! Caught up in the spotlight. Let's get back into the song...
Sing we joyous spiders together,
Fa-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la!
Our future adventures are sure to be better
... ONE TAKE! What'd I tell you?