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Buster Moon (Narrating): This was it. The moment it all began. The moment an ordinary little guy fell in love with the theater. Everything about it. The lights, the way the scenery moved, even the smell. He was only six years old, but his plans to become the first koala bear in space were suddenly toast. (Cut to older Buster at an opening gala for Moon Theater with his dad, Eddie, Miss Crawley and stagehand crew.) Some say he grew up to be the greatest showman the city has ever seen. Some called him a visionary; a maverick. (We see a camera flash and we zoom out of the picture in Buster's office.) Sure, some might say he was crazy as he was stubborn, but I say wonder and magic don't come easy, pal. Oh, there would never be any doubt. The name Buster Moon will go down in entertainment history. (He turns his swivel chair to face the audience and introduce himself.) And I should know, because I am Buster... (He is then interrupted by stage crew demanding to be paid.)
Chimpanzee: Moon, open this door!

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Buster Moon (Twice. Both when Miss Crawley tells him the stage crew members are demanding to be paid and when Miss Crawley tells him there's a long line of animals standing outside the theater for auditions.): I do? Holy moly, I really do!

Meena (At Eddie's pool house after the destruction of the theater): Mr. Moon?
Buster Moon: Meena, please...
Meena: I baked a cake for you 'cause...Well, I know you're sad right now and probably afraid to try again and...
Buster Moon: Yeah, I am afraid. I'm afraid that this... (He points to the newspaper and then kicks it in frustration.) This, me, right now, this is who I am. This is my lot for life that I'm not the guy that my dad wanted me to be. Not by a million miles.
Meena: But—but you told me...
Buster Moon: What? What? What did I say?
Meena: Well, you know..."Don't let fear stop you from the thing you love."
Buster Moon : Ugh! That's just a bunch of stupid, corny...
Meena: No, it's not.
Buster Moon: You really believe that you're going to be a singer?
Meena: Well, yeah, maybe...
Buster Moon: Well, then you're just as big a fool as I am!
(Beat. Meena is shocked by what Buster just said.)
Buster Moon: Look, kid...You and me, we're both afraid for good reason. 'Cause deep down, we know... (Sighs) We just don't have what it takes.
(Meena slams the cake on the ground with anger and leaves.)

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Miss Crawley (Tells the auditionees to come back to the stage via megaphone.): Can I everyone back to stage, please? Everyone, come back to stage for selection.
Buster Moon: Okay. Thank you, Miss Crawley.
Miss Crawley (Yells right in his ear with the megaphone.): You're welcome, Mr. Moon!

Buster Moon: (To Miss Crawley crying over her mistake with the flyers. She thinks Buster will fire her. He is exasperated.) For the last time, Miss Crawley, I am not going to fire you! Now, pull yourself together and please blow that nose of yours. (She blows her nose loudly.) No, no, no. Not in here! Blow it outside!
Miss Crawley: I'm sorry.
Buster Moon: Thank you.
Eddie: Buster, what do you expect? She's like, 200 years old.

Eddie (About Nana): You nervous?
Buster Moon: Are you kidding? (Laughs nervously) I'm absolutely terrified!

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Eddie: I don't know. Maybe we can do something together.
Buster Moon: What? Sit around playing video games? (Exclaims) Do you know what that is? (Points to the bucket for the leaking roof when he meant to point the bucket used by his dad washing cars.)
Eddie: Uh, it's a bucket.
Buster Moon: Yes. And do you know why I have this bucket?
Eddie: Because the roof is leaking?
Buster Moon: No, that's the bucket for the leak. I have this one (His dad's bucket from the car wash) because it belonged to my father. Every day, for 30 years, he worked his tail off washing cars just so I could buy this place. Every day, Eddie. Just for me.
Eddie: "Wow. Sounds like a great dad.

Meena (While stealing water from a water tower): Mr. Moon, are you sure this is legal?
Buster Moon: Uh, I don't know. But if you keep asking questions, we'll never get this done. Now hit it!

Bear Mafia Leader: Where is my money?
Mike: Okay, okay, listen, listen. I just, maybe, kind of, spent it all. You know?
(He tries to eat and swallow Mike whole.)
Mike: (Shrieks) No, no, please, wait! I'll give you the money! I'll get you $100,000!
Bear Mafia Leader: Where are you going to get that kind of money?
Mike: Moon! Okay? Moon's got my money.
Bear Mafia Leader: Who is this "Moon"?

Ash (Buster wants Ash to sing "Call Me Maybe".): I am not singing this.
Buster Moon: What's not to like? You're a female and you're a teenager. This song was made for you!
Ash (Sarcastically): Wow! It's like you can see inside my tiny teenage mind.
Buster Moon: I know, right?

Bear Mafia Leader (After playing poker with Mike at a nightclub): Well, you're one great card player, Mike.
Mike: Ha, ha. Not too bad yourself.
Bear Mafia Leader: Except I still can't tell how you cheated.
Mike: Cheated? Cheated?! Oh, I am offended! (To his girlfriend) Come on, baby, let's cut some rug.

Buster Moon: As you can see, this is no ordinary theater. This is a palace of wonder and magic!

Buster Moon (When he suddenly appears sitting by Eddie's pool, drinking his soda. This startles Eddie while he is swimming in the pool.): Are you wearing a Speedo, Eddie?

Buster Moon: All creatures great and small, welcome to the Moon Theater.

Johnny (Imitating his father while practicing driving the getaway pickup truck): "Too soft on the corners, Johnny! You're not doing it right, Johnny! Speed up, Johnny! Do it like I showed you-" (Screams as he realizes he's straight into his father)

Buster Moon (When one of the trio of frogs quits the show in hysterics): Why aren't you guys rehearsing?
Howie: We're through. They said I'm an intolerable egomaniac. I don't even know what that means!

Buster Moon (Spoilers! After hearing Meena sing "Hallelujah" in the ruins of the theater): Do you think you can sing like that? In front of a real audience?
Meena: I don't know, but I want to try.
Buster Moon: Good. (Chuckles) Because I want to see it.

Buster Moon (When he tells the contestants and Miss Crawley that he's done with doing the show): Didn't you see this? Huh? (He picks up a newspaper and reads the story about the destruction of his theater.) Look, it says I'm "a danger to society. A deluded, washed-up charlatan who never had a hit in his career."

Marcus: (Talking to his son, Johnny on a phone in jail): Where were you?
Johnny: Um, well, the thing is, I went to get gas...
Marcus: DON'T LIE TO ME!
Johnny: Um, I was at rehearsal.
Marcus: Rehearsal? For what?
Johnny: (Sighs) I was at a singing contest.
(Marcus is shocked.)
Johnny: Look, Dad...I'm sorry, I just don't want to be in your gang. I want to be a singer.
Marcus: Singer?
Johnny: Look, Dad, no, it's okay. I can get the bail money. There's a prize. It's $100,000.
(Marcus slams the phone in anger, leaving the other animals startled.)
Marcus: How did I end up with a son like you, eh? (Johnny's face is heartbroken.) You're nothing like me. You never were and you never will be. (He storms off.)
Johnny: I'll get you out! Dad, wait! I'll get the money, I promise!

Sherri-Anne's Mother: (After her daughter wasn't selected for the singing competition): That koala's a fool, Sherri-Anne. You were going to be a star one day!

Judith: I work for a bank, not a charity. And if your accounts aren't settled by the month...
Buster Moon: Okay, Judith... I personally guarantee by the end of this month, this show is going to be the biggest hit this city has ever seen!
Judith: Mr. Moon, none of your shows have ever worked. None of them! You had your chances. Now settle your accounts or we will repossess this property!

Buster Moon: (While looking at Nana Noodleman's "Epiphany" picture at her mansion): Wow. I saw this show when I was a kid. Nana, you were absolutely amazing.
Nana Noodleman: Please, this flattery is futile. I have no intention of bailing you out (Giggles). Your pathetic shows are the reason that theater no longer has an audience.
Buster Moon: Oh, but this show is gonna pack them in it like it did in the good old days.
Nana Noodleman: They were nor good old days, Mr. Moon. They were magnificent. And that theater of yours, it was a palace of wonder and magic.
Buster Moon: But, Nana, it still is.
Eddie Noodleman: Yeah, right. (Buster elbows him) Ow!
Nana Noodleman: I can recall the ushers in their velvet suits. Queues a mile long just to get a ticket. The curtain rising over that glorious stage.
Buster Moon: Music and light bringing dreams to life?
Nana Noodleman: Precisely.
Buster Moon: Well, it's just like you remember it. In fact, I've made it even more spectacular.
Eddie Noodleman: No, you haven't.
Buster Moon: Shh. Come see for yourself. A special performance just for you. What do you say, Nana?
Nana Noodleman: I say, you are a liar, Mr. Moon.
(Buster frowns and Eddie pulls him away.)
Eddie Noodleman: Okay, well... We're done now. Thank you, Nana.
Nana Noodleman: But anything's better than spending another evening playing checkers with this old fart. (Referring to her penguin butler)
Penguin Butler: What?
Buster Moon: Great! It's going to blow you away, Nana. And that is no lie!

Buster Moon: (When Johnny has to leave rehearsals for his father's gang): What do you mean you got to leave now?
Johnny: I know. I'm so sorry. It's just that I got this family business thing.
Buster Moon: Do I need to start worrying about your commitment here, Johnny? Tell me no.
Johnny: No. Absolutely not. I promise it won't happen again.
Buster Moon: It better not.
Johnny: Thank you, Mr. Moon.
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