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Quotes / Screw the Rules, I'm Beautiful!

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    Anime and Manga 

No matter what I may do... whether I kick a kitten, tear off your ears, even slaughter innocent people... the world will never cease to forgive my actions. Why, you ask? Why, it is because I am beautiful!!
Boa Hancock, One Piece

"Lend me 100 yen since I'm beautiful."
Aisa Himegami, A Certain Magical Index

    Film — Live-action 

I am raising millions of dollars for this campaign. Hundreds of thousands of people are coming to see me speak! Not John McCain (God bless him); they are coming to see me! So, if I am single-handedly carrying this "campaign"... (beat) I'm gonna do what I want.
Sarah Palin, Game Change

Just because you're beautiful, that doesn't mean you can treat people like they don't matter.


    Live-action TV 

Essentially, pharma reps are like the cast of Grey's Anatomy: they're young, they're hot, and they have virtually no medical training whatsoever.
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver on marketing to doctors


The smart grow smarter, but still can't compete
And they know deep down that they are scarred for life
And that a face can launch a thousand hips
It's gonna be all right
Sparks, "Looks, Looks, Looks"

A pretty girl... a pretty girl...
Can walk anywhere
All doors open for her
Like a breath of fresh air,
Her beauty, it precedes her
Wrapped in her beauty,
Everywhere, she is welcome
First Class on the plane,
Closed door of the club,
All faces turn, all faces turn
Man With A Gun by Jerry Harrison


How could his beauty ever compare with my soul? And although I've never seen my soul, I understand from my mother's Rabbi that it's a knockout. I, however, cannot seem to locate it for a gander. And if I could, I'd sell it in a flash for some skin-deep, transitory, meaningless beauty.

    Video Games 

Pearl: You should feel at home here, Marina. You're used to skating by on your looks.
Marina: Ouch... OK, that was pretty good.
— Conversation at Blackbelly Skatepark, Splatoon 2

    Web Animation 
Okay, so I burned down your village, but consider: I am very sexy.
Overly Sarcastic Productions "Trope Talk: Magnificent Bastards"

Blackmail? It's okay because he's attractive! Threatening violence? It's okay because he's attractive! Just outright abducting her and dragging her down into his dungeon? It's okay because- wait, that really happens in these books?
Terrible Writing Advice, "Alpha Heroes"

    Web Original 

Holy fucking shit! If you weren't so hot I'd have you arrested!

I really want to say something nice about this guy but he’s such a jobsworth he makes it difficult. Is it true (correct me if I’m wrong) that when considering a shake up in the series at the beginning of series four that both Kes and Kim were in the running for an axing but they kept Kim because he was in the top 50 of a ‘best looking guys on TV’ competition? Imagine a show fronted by four women as strong as Janeway, Kes, B’lanna and Seven? Imagine a show without Harry Kim? Makes you feel warm inside, doesn’t it?

I know a lot of people ’round these parts love ol’ Nipple H. They think she’s hot as best I can tell. That’s cool, that’s fine, different strokes, yadda yadda.

Some people get turned on zapping their nads with a cattle prod.

It's a weird world we live in.

Some might say that it's a bit odd that a magazine would make an 'Economics Correspondent' out of someone who has no background in economics, but what those critics fail to take into account is that McArdle is very tall.
Rational Wiki on pundit Megan McArdle

Abercrombie & Fitch's CEO took heat for not wanting ugly customers inside his store, which is hilarious to me because (a) have you seen the mall rats who rock A&F? And (b) have you met America? We are morbidly obese and have garbled Sanskrit tattoos littering our back fat. Way to shrink your customer base down to six people, Mike. And bonus points for shunning ugly people when you look like Philip Seymour Hoffman after twelve skin-graft surgeries.
Drew Magary, "The 25 Least Influential People of 2014"

It’s been a while since I’ve taken notice of Vani Hari, a.k.a. The Food Babe, the misguided “food safety” activist who sees chemicals, chemicals, chemicals everywhere and raises fears about them all, especially the ones that she can’t pronounce.

Don’t they know screen legends pay with their presence?! ...I like Faye’s line of thinking. Every time my bill at Whole Foods is $24,890,53, I’m going to scream at the cashier, “This is OUTRAGE! I’m only paying a sixth!”
C.J., "Faye Dunaway's Hair Salon Showdown"

Britain’s Stylist Magazine asked the German King of the Vampires what he would do if he ran England. I don’t know why Stylist even asked him that. We all know that if Kunty Karl ran England, he’d make eating actual food illegal and he’d deport all fatties to a land far, far away. Karl didn’t say he’d do that, but he did say that he’d take away welfare for families and give that money to people who dressed well. Whoever said that zombies have no sense of humor has never read a Kunty Karl quote.
Michael K. on Karl Lagerfield, "Ugly People Are Very Depressing"

But did you know that when she wasn't fulfilling her life's goal to be a low-budget Jane Fonda, she was becoming a world-renowned physician who specializes in hormone replacement therapy?

If you didn't know, that's because she absolutely wasn't doing that, but damn if that was going to stop Oprah from treating her like a medical professional anyway...when actual medical professionals were asked to be on the show, they were treated like glorified audience members, rather than featured panelists.

    Web Video 

Hypothetical: You're a wrestler working for TNA. You're literally busting your ass. Your ass is broken. (You're Kurt Angle; you're Amazing Red, who is getting thrown on his fucking head for a living). And knowing Dixie, knowing TNA—it's for peanuts.

Then "JWoww" shows up, and they just hand her 15,000 dollars for less than a night's work and essentially doing nothing.
Noah Antwiler on TNA iMPACT 10.16.10

    Western Animation 

Can I have the cabin with the lake view because I'm the prettiest?
Lindsay gets to the heart of the nut, Total Drama Island.

Lois Griffin: Ahh, I hate what you've become. Why don't you go back to that doctor and have him suck the fat out of your head?
Peter Griffin: Maybe I will! Then I'll put it on my feet and skate around on Paul Bunyan's giant skillet to cook his flapjacks!
Lois Griffin: That doesn't make any sense!
Peter Griffin: It doesn't have to. I'm beautiful!
Family Guy, "He's Too Sexy For His Fat."

    Real Life 

I am emboldened by my looks to say things Republican men wouldn't.
Ann Coulter

A friend of mine has two Daughters, whom I will call Lætitia and Daphne; The Former is one of the Greatest Beauties of the Age in which she lives, the Latter no way remarkable for any Charms in her Person. Upon this one Circumstance of their Outward Form, the Good and Ill of their Life seems to turn. Lætitia has not, from her very Childhood, heard any thing else but Commendations of her Features and Complexion, by which means she is no other than Nature made her, a very beautiful Outside. . . Poor Daphne was seldom submitted to in a Debate wherein she was concerned; her Discourse had nothing to recommend it but the good Sense of it, and she was always under a Necessity to have very well considered what she was to say before she uttered it; while Lætitia was listened to with Partiality, and Approbation sate in the Countenances of those she conversed with, before she communicated what she had to say.
Joseph Addison

If there are two girls weeping on Charing Cross Station, and one is beautiful and the other is plain, the plain girl can sit there and grow old, but it takes about 15 minutes before Tom Baker comes along and says to the pretty one, ‘Where are you going?’ She says, ‘Folkstone, but I’ve got no money,’ and I say, ‘Listen,’ and give her a 20-pound note. Physical beauty transcends everything. It is the ultimate currency.

Oz has become used to crowds, to adulation, and to fame. That morning, when he arrived in darkness, hundreds of people, mostly women, already stood in line at the entrance to the hospital; many lacked insurance, a doctor, or medical support of any kind. There were screams of delight when he hopped out of the car. People had come for the free exam and for helpful advice, but also to see him...Another threw her arms around his neck. “I haven’t seen a doctor in eight years,” she said. “I’m scared. You are the only one I trust.”
The New Yorker on The Doctor Oz Show

This Sarah Palin phenomenon is very curious. I think somebody watching us from Mars would think the country has gone insane.
Noam Chomsky


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