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Randy: There are certain rules that one must abide by in order to successfully survive a horror movie. For instance, number one: you can never have sex.
<Crowd boos at him>
Randy: Big no-no! Big no-no! Sex equals death, okay? Number two. You can never drink or do drugs.
<Crowd cheers, and raises their beer bottles>
Randy: No, listen! It's a sin! It's an extension of number one. And number three. Never, ever, ever, under any circumstances, say "I'll be right back." 'Cause you won't be back.
Stu: I'm gettin' another beer, you want one?
Randy: Yeah, sure.
Stu: I'll be right back!
Randy: You see, you push the laws, and you end up dead, okay? I'll see you in the kitchen with a knife.
Ghostface: Do you like scary movies?
Sidney: What's the point? They're all the same. Some stupid killer stalking some big-breasted girl who can't act who's always running up the stairs when she should be going out the front door. It's insulting.
—Now guess what Sidney does when confronted by the killer?
Billy Loomis: Now Sid, don't you blame the movies! Movies don't create psychos, movies make psychos more creative!
Mickey: You really should deal with your trust issues, Sid. I mean, poor Derek. He was completely innocent and such a nice boy too. He was bright, and fun, and handsome, had a good voice and was going to be a doctor. This is just the kind of boy you'd like to take on to mom... if you had a mom.
Sidney: Fuck you!
Mickey: Oh! So vulgar! Did Billy let you talk to him like this?
Mickey: Billy was good at this. He knew it's all about execution.
Sidney: Yeah? But you forgot one thing about Billy Loomis.
Mickey: What's that?
Sidney: I fucking killed him!
Ghostface: Oh, it's hard being friends with you, Sidney. When you're friends with Sidney, you die.
Sidney: It's your turn to scream, asshole!
Sidney: Do you know why you kill people, Roman? Do you? You kill people because you choose to! There is no one else to blame!
Ghostface: Welcome home, Sidney. Preview of coming events.
Sidney: Why don't you come for me? Ain't got the balls for that?
Ghostface: Oh, poor Sidney. You think this is all about you. You think you're still the star.
Sidney: This isn't a fucking movie!
Ghostface: It will be.
Sidney: These are innocent people!
Ghostface: Spare me the lecture! You've done very well by all this bloodshed, haven't you? But how about the town you've left behind? I got plans for you. I'm gonna slit your eyelids in half so you don't blink when I stab you in the face. You'll die when I want you to, Sidney, not a moment before... until then, you're going to suffer.
Charlie: A party. Guaranteed third act main cast bloodbath.
Gale: Okay, so do you know of a party that's happening tonight?
Charlie: Well... there's Stab-a-thon.
Charlie: It's a movie marathon. All seven Stab back to back, we do it every year.
Sidney: And it's tonight? There's a killer out there patterning his murders after the original movie.
Charlie: I know. It's pretty wild.
Jill Roberts: Look around. We're all living in public now, we're all in the internet. How do you think people become famous anymore? You don't have to achieve anything. You just gotta have fucked up shit happen to you.