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Quotes / Pædo Hunt

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"I think this thing's gone a little too far
Hell, I only offered him a candy bar
I said 'WAIT!' I said 'What are you doin'?'
They said 'PER-VERT, the kid's life is ruined!'"
Peter, Paul and Mary, "Talkin' Candy Bar Blues"

"If pedos looked like pedos, they'd never do any... pedo-ing!"
Nina, Being Human.

"Thou shalt not call a man over 30 who plays with a child who is not his own a paedophile — some people are just nice."
Scroobius Pip, Thou Shalt Always Kill

"By the powers invested in me by tabloid reading imbeciles, I pronounce you guilty — of paedophilia."
The Paedofinder General, Monkey Dust

"Why don't you have a seat over there..."
Chris Hansen, Dateline, "To Catch A Predator."

I know, R. Kelly defending Bill Cosby is like Sarah Palin endorsing Donald Trump as president. Now I’m just waiting for Woody Allen and Subway Jared to publicly take their places in Team Pudding Pop.
Michael K., "You Saw This Coming"

"Long-time readers will remember my dissection of Jimmy Savile’s disturbingly rapey 1974 autobiography, Love is an Uphill Thing, and those of us who survived that journey aren’t exactly bowled over by the revelations that the screeching, schoolgirl-obsessed scarecrow-man was the world’s most prolific paedophile, haunting the highways, byways, and television centres like a predatory Jack Kerouac, seeking only the freedom to be left alone in a room with an under-age girl, while wearing tear-away tracksuit bottoms."

Guy pulls over, opens and closes car door in general vicinity of child. EVERYBODY PANIC

Jared: I like your tool! Wanna hold mine?
Toolshed: Jesus! Fucking pedo!


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