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Quotes / Inelegant Blubbering

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    Fan Works 

"Crying doesn't always look like it does in beautiful Leiji Matsumoto anime ladies."
Steven Universe fanart of Blue Diamond by angegrautes


Somehow, [Jai Long] had pictured a man of Gokren's power and dignity standing over his son's body with arms folded, demanding recompense from those responsible. Maybe a single tear would roll down his face, or his commanding voice would catch for an instant, as a brief acknowledgement of human grief.
He had never expected Gokren to weep as though an enemy had torn out his own heart.
Cradle Series book 3: Blackflame

Thayet dipped her handkerchief in Alanna's water basin and wiped the knight's face. "Some women can cry and look beautiful," she said drily. "You and I can't."
"I know," Alanna sniffed. "I get red and blotchy."

    Video Games 

"What's this? Your cryin' face is so not cute."
Ryuji, Persona 5

    Visual Novels 

Rin: Why? Why does all this happen? People are doing things I don't ask for and don't want and everyone keeps getting angry at me, I have no idea what is going on any more and can't stop feeling like I want to run away from everything...
She shuts her eyes tight and breathes out deeply, calmly. When the eyelids open, all I can see is dark green desperation.
"Tears burst forth in a noisy wave. There was nothing beautiful about her face as she sobbed."
— The narrator of A Little Lily Princess, on Lavinia


Téodor: Toward the end, you were screaming, crying, begging us to help you...
Ray: Man, I doubt I was CRYIN'!
Téodor: ...but the shoes would always dance you away from us while you blubbered.
Ray: I don't even know HOW to blubber!
Téodor: Blubbering is when you're crying so hard that when you try to talk, it just comes out like "A BLOOOO BLA BLOO BLOO BLOOOOOOOOO!"

    Web Original 

"Speaking of how real people act, that brings me to the second thing that I find most appealing about this movie: there is no sexy cry. In movies, at least that I've found, there are three distinctive kinds of crying. The first is: the sexy cry; it's the cry that when you see it, you think: 'Aw, they're trying to be brave', or hide their emotion, or, at worst—they're crying, but want to stay attractive. The second is: the public sob; that's when the lip quivers more and perhaps gasping and mild groans are emitted. You think: 'I need to feel sorry for this character because they're clearly in distress'. Then there's... (clip plays) YES! THAT is how you cry. That's the kind of crying where liquid oozes out of every orifice and you make noises like a drowning moose. The kind of crying that isn't attractive because—sadness isn't attractive. It's that kind of crying that causes you to actually feel a twinge of guilt and embarrassment for willingly observing someone literally break down."

    Western Animation 

Baljeet: That was not my guitar. That was me. I call it the Fail Wail. [wails and screams melodramatically]
Phineas Baljeet, Baljeet! Whoa! HEY! [Baljeet stops wailing] Thank you.

    Real Life 

"Where in all nature is there anything uglier and more undignified than an adult male face blubbered and distorted with weeping?"
An Experiment in Criticism by C. S. Lewis