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Quotes / Hollywood Atheist

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I'm honestly curious about what the backstory is on today's Herb and Jamaal, in which Herb has charged into Rev. Croom's office to angrily challenge his entire belief system. Is this happening after yet another Sunday service that Herb's family dragged him to, and something in the sermon finally pushed him over the edge until he couldn't stay quiet anymore? Or was he just sitting at work, stewing over Croom's unshakeable faith in the unprovable, until eventually he just barged into the Reverend's office hours demanding that he make room in his mental universe for doubt? At any rate, the final panel proves that Herb is helpless before the power of wordplay.
The Comics Curmudgeon on Herb and Jamaal

I really like the emotional journey we get to go on with Killer here. Like, in the first panel, he overhears Beetle saying nice things to the chaplain, and he’s like “Oh shit! Is my buddy Beetle actually one of those goody-goody church types? Gross!” But then when he realizes Beetle is just toying with the chaplain’s emotions, he settles into a mood of smug, heavy-lidded sinfulness. “Ahh, yes, less time in church means less time to feel guilty and more time to attack and dethrone God.”


Film — Animated

"Relax, these pious morons are too busy praying to their phoney-baloney God."

Film — Live - Action

"And indeed you shall die. And be reborn a hero! Of the kind that walked the Earth long before the pale religions of civilization infected humanity's soul."
David Banner, Hulk

Ranger Brad: You don't believe those old legends about the Lost Skeleton of Cadavra, do you?
Dr. Roger Fleming: Ranger Brad, I'm a scientist; I don't believe in anything.



The fool hath said in his heart, There is no God. They are corrupt, they have done abominable works, there is none that doeth good.

Jasnah: If you add one and one, that makes two, does it not?
Taravangian: Well, yes.
Jasnah: No god needs declare it so for it to be true. So, could we not say that mathematics exists outside the Almighty, independent of him?
Taravangian: Perhaps.
Jasnah: Well. I simply claim that morality and human will are independent of him too.
Taravangian: If you say that, then you've removed all purpose for the Almighty's existence!
Jasnah: Indeed.

Stand-Up Comedy

"I wish I could meet a Christian who would proselytize to me, but they keep running away from me."


God is dead.
That's what they said.
Done in by Darwin, Marx and Freud.
Free are we
From Deity.
Of course it sort of leaves a little void.
I used to care about my fellow man.
But now—hurrah—I'm free.
And it's simply not my problem
Potemkin, Celebration ("Not My Problem")


"How was church? Did you present proper tribute to your invisible sky wizard?"
Walky, Dumbing of Age

Penelope: It's just dumb and irrational! There's no evidence for any of it! It's all stupid fairy-tales that people use to shield themselves from reality. There are no spirits, there is no afterlife, and there is no god watching over us like some creepy cosmic voyeur.
Dora: Lemme guess — strict religious upbringing?

Web Original

Though Atheism is technically the opposite of religion, there are still quite a few atheists out there who treat it like one.

Just to be clear, I'm not a professional "quote maker". I'm just an atheist teenager who greatly values his intelligence and scientific fact over any silly fiction book written 3,500 years ago. That being said, I am open to any and all criticism.
"In this moment, I am euphoric. Not because of any phony god's blessing. But because, I am enlightened by my intelligence."
Aalewis, posted on the r/atheism subreddit

While this seems to be becoming more of a norm in places like Scandinavia, where religious belief has reached an all-time low, if you happen to be an atheist in America we have some potentially bad news for you: There's a damn good chance that people don't like you. Including other atheists.

Western Animation

"Uh oh, retard alert! Retard alert, class! Do you believe in a flying spaghetti monster too, bubblehead?"
Mrs Garrison, South Park

"Yarr, without organised religion I've lost me moral compass."
The Sea Captain, The Simpsons

"Without the shackles of religion, you're free to do whatever you want. Break a Commandment. Break all of 'em!"
Roger, American Dad!

Real Life

Q: Killing babies is fine?
Seth MacFarlane: I’m an atheist, so I don’t give a shit.
Crave Online (Note this seems to have been self-parody).


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