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Quotes / Drugs Are Bad

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Come on, you've gotta listen unto me
Lay off that whiskey and let that cocaine be
Johnny Cash, "Cocaine Blues"

Mouth's so dried and I just spit ash
In a hole in my pocket full of wasted cash
But it's all right, it was just bad stash
The Wildhearts, "Sick of Drugs"

And you twitch in your seat, 'cause you wanna hit the street when you're on drugs
And you cause such a fuss, 'cause there's no one you can trust when you're on drugs
And the best of your days will vanish into haze when you're on drugs
And you wish you could quit, 'cause you're really sick of it, but you're on drugs
Weezer, "We Are All on Drugs"

And if Satan had a lady friend, her name was Mary Jane
I never wondered why she tried to drive us quite insane
Aerosmith, "Legendary Child"

Xans don't make you
Xans gon' take you
Xans gon' fake you
And Xans gon' betray you
Lil Xan, "Betrayed"

Wheelin' 23rd we saw nuthin' but thugs
The girlies was too skinny from smokin' all them drugs
Cause the rock man got 'em and their butts just dropped
The freaks looked depressed 'cause the Benz won't stop
Sir Mix-a-Lot, "Posse on Broadway"

My mother said to get things done
You better not mess with Major Tom.

Hey, old Sniffinhammer takes another whiff
Wait, you didn't think they'd treat you quite like this
Doctor Steel, Marionette

Don't Use Drugs
People's Drug Stores
PSA found on 1980s Washington, D.C.-based People's Drug Stores shopping bags

(On seeing ex-supervillain Bane as a shriveled up vegetable.) "What happened to him?"
"Too many years on Venom. That's what the stuff'll do to you."
Batman Beyond, The Winning Edge.

Turn on, tune in, drop dead
MAD magazine (February 1968), paraphrasing Timothy Leary

Drugs are so bad!

Drugs. Now there's a real nightmare.
Freddy Krueger, Freddy's Nightmares

Weaver: I always hated the speeches when I was in school, the preaching in auditoriums, the one-note message. Stuff like saying drugs are bad. It’s wrong. Drugs are fantastic. People wouldn’t do them if they weren’t. They make you feel good, make your day brighter, give you energy-
Mrs. Yamada: (Warningly) Weaver.
Weaver: -until they don’t. People hear the message that drugs are bad, that they’ll ruin your life if you do them once. And then you find out that isn’t exactly true because your friends did it and turned out okay, or you wind up trying something and you’re fine. So you try them, try them again. It isn’t a mind-shattering moment of horrible when you try that first drug. Or so I hear. It’s subtle, it creeps up on you, and you never really get a good, convincing reason to stop before it ruins your life beyond comprehension. I never went down that road, but I knew a fair number of people who did. People who worked for me, when I was a supervillain.

Stop with those fucking drugs. They're turning your mind into mush.
Jimmy Conway, Goodfellas

Let it come from deep inside your heart; Not from drugs, cigarettes or anything else.
— "Better Things to Do" by Judy Pancoast

"Drugs?! Yuck! P'tooey!"
Scooby-Doo, A Pup Named Scooby-Doo, "Scooby Dude"

"It's not good to smoke! These spongy things inside our chests are called 'lungs'. They are our breathing machines. If we smoke, we build them up with dirty tar. Then, they don't work properly. And so, we cough!"
Dr. Dog, Doctor Dog

"Those drugs are so boring!"

"Drugs can mess you up! Even kill you!"
Velma Dinkley, A Pup Named Scooby-Doo, "Scooby Dude"

"Don't smoke or you'll look like me!"
Ugly Boy on Poster, Diary of a Wimpy Kid

"Drugs! This is what they do to your brain, Michael!"
Kermit the Frog, Cartoon All-Stars to the Rescue (about a psychedelic environment)

Michael: "Now I'm seeing ducks!? I gotta get off these drugs."
Huey: "Drugs?! Oh bad news, Michael!"

"What's up, Doc, is your life if you don't get off those drugs."

Michelangelo: "Like, you fell into a radical hole, dude! You could've avoided it, but you weren't thinking. Come to think of it, that's a lot of your problem."
Michael: "What problem?"
Michelangelo: "Drugs, bud. Your brain must be, like, really messed-up."

"Don't smoke, it's a joke"

Michael: (about a really ugly reflection) "Who's that?"
ALF: "Well, it's not Freddy Kreuger. This is you. Pretty pitiful, huh? You see, drugs aren't your pal, pal, they're your enemy, storming the battlements, trying to take control."
Michael: "I can quit if I want to! I'm in charge of my life!"
ALF: "Not if you're on drugs!"

"There's nothing cool about a fool on drugs."

"Smoking is a bad habit. My species gave it up centuries ago when we finally got it into our heads that it was killing us."
Thomas "Tom" Eugene Paris, Star Trek: Voyager, "Ex Post Facto"

Treasure Monster: "Would you care for a space martini?"
Galatea: "Hm? Alcohol is stupidity in liquid form. No."

O God, that men should put an enemy in their blood to steal away their brains! That we should, with joy, pleasance, revel, and applause, transform ourselves into beasts!
—Cassio (about alcohol), "Othello," William Shakespeare

Oberon: Are you suggesting that drugging people without their consent is somehow OBJECTIVELY TERRIBLE??
Puck: Yes.
Oberon: And are you suggesting that you know drugs are bad and didn't need a book to illustrate it for you, much less one where if you die in the book, you die in real life??
Puck: Yeah, I think so.
—"A Midsummer Night's Choice", Romeo and/or Juliet

Real Life

Sex, Drugs and Rock & Roll: stop doing drugs, and you have more time for the other two.

William S. Sessions, Director, FBI, featured prominently in arcade games throughout the 1990s

There are 100,000 total marijuana smokers in the US, and most are Negroes, Hispanics, Filipinos and entertainers. Their Satanic music, jazz and swing, result from marijuana usage. This marijuana causes white women to seek sexual relations with Negroes, entertainers and any others.
Harry Anslinger, America's first drug czar, in 1937

Drugs pull you down and shut the lid on life. Pot opens everything up. All the anxieties, the creepy crawly blues, it all just drifts away and you can slowly remember what it feels like to be alive. Even more importantly, you can take a step back from the crap that's flying and see what really is important, which of the many things in your life really deserves worrying about. Not much!

Happy, self-confident men do not seek to get stoned. Drug addiction is the attempt to obliterate one's consciousness, the quest for a deliberately-induced insanity. As such, it is so obscene and evil that any doubt about the moral character of its practitioners is itself an obscenity.
Ayn Rand, Apollo and Dionysus

Like a brain surgeon who drinks a martini when he's not on call, the successful kids in your school may smoke pot on occasion, but they are not stoners.
Bill O'Reilly, The O'Reilly Factor For Kids

We are a drug culture already. Sleeping pills, aspirins, the nightcap that too often becomes an Indian war bonnet. Ideally, reality should be so interesting that we don’t need tranquilizers and stimulants. But since there are too many people in the world and not enough for them to do — certainly very little that is interesting — the American majority serve their 40 hours a week in order to stun themselves with beer, television, whatever, come the weekend.

Bush came out and said, 'We are losing the war against drugs.' You know what that implies? There's a war being fought, and the people on drugs are winning it.

A particular trademark of the VSE is that it can't be trusted to deal with substance abuse issues without turning into a hysterical, hand-flapping PSA, like those after school specials where a straight-A bookworm takes one whiff of second-hand pot smoke and immediately joins a murderous biker gang before launching themselves from the highest building in the city, because they can flyyyyy!
Stuart Millard, So Excited, So Scared

Telegenic white women don't disappear mysteriously or get indicted for gruesome murders every day, and Nancy Grace needs something to talk about when she can't scrape up a Casey Anthony. It seems she's decided to wage war on that devil weed mary jane, which is ironic, because no one needs pot more than Nancy Grace.
Kelly Faircloth, "Nancy Grace Freaks Out on Pot Advocate: 'Obviously You're Stoned'"

Denzel goes in front of the hearing and knocks it out of the park, the coke having given his brain the kind of sharpness and clarity that earlier allowed him to do the incredible plane-saving maneuver. Yay, cocaine! wonder producers went nuts for this script — this is like the gospel Hollywood lives by.

David: Some days, you just can’t get rid of a bomb, kids.
Chris: This scene is fantastic for a lot of reasons... but my favorite is that Robin pretty much tells Batman he should’ve just blown up the bar because drunks deserve to die. That kid is ice cold.
David: I don’t get what’s up Robin’s ass, unless they’re intentionally writing him to discourage teenage drinking for some reason.
Chris: He also refers to them as “riff-raff,” thus confirming his status as an entitled young plutocrat.
—Chris Sims and David Uzumeri on Batman: The Movie

My strong suspicion, although I don't now how to prove it, is that the reason is that marijuana's a weed, you can grow it in your backyard, so there's nobody who would make any money off it if it were legal. Tobacco requires extensive capital inputs and technology, and it can be monopolized, so there are people who can make a ton of money off it. I don't really see the difference between the two, frankly—except that tobacco's far more lethal and far more addictive.
Noam Chomsky, Understanding Power

We also have anecdotal now from Colorado, where some of the people who were taking marijuana for these purposes, the coroner believed after they died that there were drug interactions with other things they were taking.
Chelsea Clinton

Cocaine is God's way of telling you that you're making too much money.

I'm Michael Jordan. McDonald's Restaurants have given me this time to talk to you about something we both really care about: Kids. Kids are the reason McDonald's sponsors their "Get It Straight" program, and national drug awareness effort. Think about this: Many of you using drugs out there now are under 18. Do you realize that at 18, you have lived only one fourth of your life? When you're using drugs, you're only cheating yourself out of the chance to find out who you really can be. And believe me, if you don't use drugs, you can just about be anything you wanna be. Listen, you got at least three fourths of your life to go. That's three more lifetimes to you. So don't blow it. Don't do drugs. If you're doin' it, stop it. Get some help. McDonald's wants you to give yourself a chance. A chance to find out all the wonderful things you really can be, and so do I.
Michael Jordan in a 1987 PSA.

Hi, I'm Jon, and after watching Pablo the Mule Dog be stuffed with handfuls and handfuls of cock-aine, I've come here and me and McDonald's have come here to tell you what we know... to truly be important: The family. The Big Mac. McNuggets. Come on down, grab just a 4-pack— 4-piece McNuggets from G— from God's green soil itself. Grown from our— straight from McDonald Farms, $1.99 only, 2-piece Chicken McNuggets, one for to get for free. Listen, if you're doin' drugs, stop it, or else Mr. T's gonna come shake all that loose change right outta your pockets. How you gonna get a 6-piece Chicken McNuggets then? Reopen that 9/11 investigation, what really happened there? We just gotta know the facts. Just re— just reopen it, take a look. Never know what's gonna be inside. That's me, Jon. See ya later.
JonTron parodying the above PSA after watching it and several others.


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