Quotes / Donut Mess with a Cop

John: Just once I'd like to have a normal work day... a little filing, some coffee and donuts. No guns, no bombs, no hassle!

— Die Hard: Vendetta

Guard: Damn, you guys got here fast! There a doughnut shop on campus or something?
Jonathan: I'm not a cop. I need you to help me find the archives...

— Jonathan Kane: The Protector

"I'm gonna get us something from all four food groups: hamburgers, french fries, coffee and doughnuts."

— Ridzik, Red Heat

"According to this report you've eaten over 64,000 donuts in the first five episodes alone!"

— Bargearse, "Where's My Bloody Donuts?"

"Creep into the donut stop. Sneak in, tiptoe past the cop!"

— "BRAINS!", The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy

Shaw: If we get into trouble, just lay suppressive fire across that arc.
Fusco: You know I'm a cop, right?
Shaw: If we were eating doughnuts and shooting cardboard cutouts, you'd be in charge.

— Person of Interest, "return 0"

Chief: All in favor of more doughnuts in the break room, say "aye".

Officers give a resounding chorus of "aye".

Janitor: Nay.

Chief: Shut up, Janitor! You don't count!

— Escaping the Prison, Henry overhears a police meeting

"What do you think we do all day? You think we just sit around eating donuts with our thumbs planted firmly up our asses?"

—George Stacy, The Amazing Spider-Man

Sonic: You're the only one I could think of, Donut Lord.
Tom: What's with that "Donut Lord"?
Sonic: Because you talk to donuts, and eat them if they get out of line.
Tom: Again, fair point.

—Sonic the Hedgehog (2020)

"So many cops, you'd think they givin' away donuts."

—Albrecht, The Crow

Roger: Cops already? What, are we next door to a freakin' Krispy Kreme?

Stan: You're thinking about donuts now?

Roger: No, I'm just saying the cops got here fast.

Stan: What the hell do fast cops have to do with a Krispy Kreme?

Roger: Because cops love donuts!

Stan: You're not making any sense!

— American Dad!

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