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Fantasy
Corpse Chic
Hugo (showing his badge): Alexis Cardinot, we're placing you under arrest for the murder of Elise Marx!
Alexis: So you think losing my best friend is not tragedy enough - you have to accuse me of murdering her too?!
Hugo: The only tragedy here aside from murder is the loss of your pretty face to the world once we throw you in jail!
Hugo: You see, we found the rat poison you discarded at Le Froufrou, from where you so love to buy your Paris-Brests!
Hugo: And we know you spiked your supposed best friend's perfume with the aforementioned poison... thereby ensuring an excruciating death!
Hugo: What's more, if you think we didn't unearth the Voltaire-inspired threat you texted your victim, then you've underestimated <Rank> <Name>'s sleuthing prowess!
Alexis (sweating): I... I...
Hugo: But surely you didn't murder Elise Marx just because she stole your boyfriend? If that were the case, half of us Parisians would be dead!
Alexis: Of course it wasn't for anything as trivial as that! I murdered Elise because she was blackmailing me!
Hugo: Aha, so you finally admit to the murder! And you say blackmail was involved? Tell us more...
Alexis: Well, this whole boyfriend story was just a ruse to get the paparazzi off our backs... The truth is that I was Elise's lover! Or, to be precise, I was her sex toy!
Hugo: You were a beautiful model's sex toy? Sounds rather wonderful to me!
Alexis: It wasn't! The fact is, we were involved in sordid sex games where I let Elise use me how she wanted!
Alexis: At first, it was fun and sexy, but then I started getting tired of being treated like a piece of chewing gum at the bottom of Elise's stiletto... And that's when the problems began...
Alexis: Elise just couldn't accept the fact that I didn't want to be her sex slave anymore! So she started threatening to post humiliating photos of me online!
Alexis: If those images became public, it would have not only destroyed me and my career, but also my family! I couldn't let my poor, innocent maman go through that!
Hugo: So you decided that the only way out of this was to kill Elise?
Alexis: I'm afraid so. I bought some rat poison, and when Elise wasn't looking, I laced her favorite perfume with it... And you know what happened next.
Hugo: We certainly do, and I think you know what is going to happen next for you...
Hugo: Alexis Cardinot, you're under arrest!
Murder à la ModeAlexis: So you think losing my best friend is not tragedy enough - you have to accuse me of murdering her too?!
Hugo: The only tragedy here aside from murder is the loss of your pretty face to the world once we throw you in jail!
Hugo: You see, we found the rat poison you discarded at Le Froufrou, from where you so love to buy your Paris-Brests!
Hugo: And we know you spiked your supposed best friend's perfume with the aforementioned poison... thereby ensuring an excruciating death!
Hugo: What's more, if you think we didn't unearth the Voltaire-inspired threat you texted your victim, then you've underestimated <Rank> <Name>'s sleuthing prowess!
Alexis (sweating): I... I...
Hugo: But surely you didn't murder Elise Marx just because she stole your boyfriend? If that were the case, half of us Parisians would be dead!
Alexis: Of course it wasn't for anything as trivial as that! I murdered Elise because she was blackmailing me!
Hugo: Aha, so you finally admit to the murder! And you say blackmail was involved? Tell us more...
Alexis: Well, this whole boyfriend story was just a ruse to get the paparazzi off our backs... The truth is that I was Elise's lover! Or, to be precise, I was her sex toy!
Hugo: You were a beautiful model's sex toy? Sounds rather wonderful to me!
Alexis: It wasn't! The fact is, we were involved in sordid sex games where I let Elise use me how she wanted!
Alexis: At first, it was fun and sexy, but then I started getting tired of being treated like a piece of chewing gum at the bottom of Elise's stiletto... And that's when the problems began...
Alexis: Elise just couldn't accept the fact that I didn't want to be her sex slave anymore! So she started threatening to post humiliating photos of me online!
Alexis: If those images became public, it would have not only destroyed me and my career, but also my family! I couldn't let my poor, innocent maman go through that!
Hugo: So you decided that the only way out of this was to kill Elise?
Alexis: I'm afraid so. I bought some rat poison, and when Elise wasn't looking, I laced her favorite perfume with it... And you know what happened next.
Hugo: We certainly do, and I think you know what is going to happen next for you...
Hugo: Alexis Cardinot, you're under arrest!
Carrie: Juliette Segal, you're under arrest for the murder of Sébastien Lefebvre!
Juliette: Me? Murder him? But I had a crush on him!
Carrie: Well, maybe you confessed your love and his rejection was too much to take. We've seen it happen.
Carrie: So you opted for a swift strike, shooting him with a silencer on your pistol.
Carrie: We found the left-hand glove you used to make sure you didn't get prints on the gun.
Carrie: But you still left enough of your lens cleaner and cigarette ash at the crime scene for us to find you out!
Juliette: It's not like that! I only added the hearts to get you off my trail. What I really wanted was to work for Seb!
Carrie: You what? But you already work in the same office. Did you want to be his assistant or something?
Juliette: Look, I knew he made a deal to do a fashion advice show on TV, and more than anything I wanted to work on that show!
Juliette: So I played my cards right and got an internship at Flamme. I was in the perfect position to show him what an asset I would be on his team!
Juliette: I did a whole bunch of sketches, like the one you found, but he said my drawings were horrible!
Carrie: So you didn't have the same fashion sense. And you decided that was reason to murder him?
Juliette: He hated my drawings so much that he started telling Martine she should fire me! He said the magazine would suffer from my presence!
Carrie: So not only did he crush your dreams of working on his TV show, but he threatened to push you out of the fashion industry completely.
Juliette (crying): Exactly! I tried to scare him with anonymous threats, but nothing worked.
Juliette (crying): I had to fight harder than anyone to get this internship!
Juliette: Growing up in the suburbs of Paris didn't help me get this job, but it did help me get the gun I used to keep this job!
Carrie: But you know there are always other magazines, other TV shows. And now you're leaving the fashion industry for prison! Ms Segal, you're under arrest!
Making the CutJuliette: Me? Murder him? But I had a crush on him!
Carrie: Well, maybe you confessed your love and his rejection was too much to take. We've seen it happen.
Carrie: So you opted for a swift strike, shooting him with a silencer on your pistol.
Carrie: We found the left-hand glove you used to make sure you didn't get prints on the gun.
Carrie: But you still left enough of your lens cleaner and cigarette ash at the crime scene for us to find you out!
Juliette: It's not like that! I only added the hearts to get you off my trail. What I really wanted was to work for Seb!
Carrie: You what? But you already work in the same office. Did you want to be his assistant or something?
Juliette: Look, I knew he made a deal to do a fashion advice show on TV, and more than anything I wanted to work on that show!
Juliette: So I played my cards right and got an internship at Flamme. I was in the perfect position to show him what an asset I would be on his team!
Juliette: I did a whole bunch of sketches, like the one you found, but he said my drawings were horrible!
Carrie: So you didn't have the same fashion sense. And you decided that was reason to murder him?
Juliette: He hated my drawings so much that he started telling Martine she should fire me! He said the magazine would suffer from my presence!
Carrie: So not only did he crush your dreams of working on his TV show, but he threatened to push you out of the fashion industry completely.
Juliette (crying): Exactly! I tried to scare him with anonymous threats, but nothing worked.
Juliette (crying): I had to fight harder than anyone to get this internship!
Juliette: Growing up in the suburbs of Paris didn't help me get this job, but it did help me get the gun I used to keep this job!
Carrie: But you know there are always other magazines, other TV shows. And now you're leaving the fashion industry for prison! Ms Segal, you're under arrest!
Hugo: Candy Wu, you're under arrest for the murder of Béatrice Sanchez!
Candy: What? I already told you - I had nothing to do with Béatrice's death!
Hugo: And we might have believed you, if we hadn't found traces of your blood on the scissors you stabbed Béatrice to death with!
Hugo: You hid them in a basket of thread, before grabbing the blood-soaked veil Béatrice was wearing and fleeing to the rooftop with your cup of whipped coffee!
Hugo: How heartless you must be to even think of coffee after robbing someone of their life!
Candy: I... I wasn't thinking straight! It was like I was on autopilot!
Hugo: So you confess to the murder! Why did you do it? Because Béatrice made you look bad in front of Monsieur Pilsnerfeld?
Candy: No... I killed her because she ruined the dress!
(Candy facepalms.)
Candy: Now that you know the truth, I might as well explain what happened. I'd forgotten my phone at the workshop. So I went back, thinking nobody would be there.
Candy: But there was Béatrice, freaking out. She'd shoehorned herself into the dress and split the seams!
Hugo: Ah, yes. The infamous dress that was supposed to close the Chior show!
Candy: The whole show was created around that dress, <Name>. I worked on it day and night for months, sewing until my hands bled and I was too tired to see what I was doing.
Candy: When I realized that Béatrice had torn it beyond repair, something in me just snapped!
Candy: I grabbed a pair of scissors on a nearby worktop and I... I stabbed her once, then twice, and then I just couldn't stop! I don't know what came over me!
Hugo: I'm afraid you'll have to explain your actions to a judge, Mademoiselle Wu. You're under arrest!
Party Like It's 1699Candy: What? I already told you - I had nothing to do with Béatrice's death!
Hugo: And we might have believed you, if we hadn't found traces of your blood on the scissors you stabbed Béatrice to death with!
Hugo: You hid them in a basket of thread, before grabbing the blood-soaked veil Béatrice was wearing and fleeing to the rooftop with your cup of whipped coffee!
Hugo: How heartless you must be to even think of coffee after robbing someone of their life!
Candy: I... I wasn't thinking straight! It was like I was on autopilot!
Hugo: So you confess to the murder! Why did you do it? Because Béatrice made you look bad in front of Monsieur Pilsnerfeld?
Candy: No... I killed her because she ruined the dress!
(Candy facepalms.)
Candy: Now that you know the truth, I might as well explain what happened. I'd forgotten my phone at the workshop. So I went back, thinking nobody would be there.
Candy: But there was Béatrice, freaking out. She'd shoehorned herself into the dress and split the seams!
Hugo: Ah, yes. The infamous dress that was supposed to close the Chior show!
Candy: The whole show was created around that dress, <Name>. I worked on it day and night for months, sewing until my hands bled and I was too tired to see what I was doing.
Candy: When I realized that Béatrice had torn it beyond repair, something in me just snapped!
Candy: I grabbed a pair of scissors on a nearby worktop and I... I stabbed her once, then twice, and then I just couldn't stop! I don't know what came over me!
Hugo: I'm afraid you'll have to explain your actions to a judge, Mademoiselle Wu. You're under arrest!
Carrie: Louis d'Anjou! How could you murder your own mother?! And in such a violent manner, no less!
Louis: Goodness me! It would be impossible for me to even dream of beheading my own flesh and blood, especially after what happened to my ancestors during the French Rev-
Carrie: Enough of your history lessons, Mr d'Anjou! Now, we found your tennis club handkerchief - the very one you used to knock your mother out with chloroform...
Carrie: ... You then proceeded to cut off her head using a meat cleaver from the kitchen, didn't you?
Louis (sweating): I... I...
Carrie: But that wasn't enough... because you then went back to the kitchen and unceremoniously dumped the head in a sack of vegetables!
Louis: In retrospect, it was disrespectful to my dearest maman, I must admit!
Carrie: So you admit you killed her!
Louis: I'm afraid so. I had to!
Louis: You see, I wasn't lying when I said we had no money left in our coffers... Which is why I came up with the brilliant idea to turn Château Pompette into a luxury bed and breakfast!
Louis: You've seen my castle - people would sell their grandmother to experience the exquisite life of a noble, even for one night!
Louis: But my mother wasn't having any of it! She was too proud. Said there was no way she'd allow common riff-raff into her home!
Louis: But I could see no other way to prevent my esteemed family from going under. Nor for me to continue living the lifestyle to which I was accustomed. Which is why it was time for my poor maman to go.
Carrie: Alright, Mr d'Anjou. But the one thing I don't understand is why you had to kill her in such a grotesque way?
Louis: For the pure theatrics of it, of course! Also, I was sure that dispensing of her head in the kitchen would make you pin the murder on our sultry cook!
Carrie (showing her badge): Well, I'm afraid your plan didn't work. Louis d'Anjou, you're under arrest!
Death by DesignLouis: Goodness me! It would be impossible for me to even dream of beheading my own flesh and blood, especially after what happened to my ancestors during the French Rev-
Carrie: Enough of your history lessons, Mr d'Anjou! Now, we found your tennis club handkerchief - the very one you used to knock your mother out with chloroform...
Carrie: ... You then proceeded to cut off her head using a meat cleaver from the kitchen, didn't you?
Louis (sweating): I... I...
Carrie: But that wasn't enough... because you then went back to the kitchen and unceremoniously dumped the head in a sack of vegetables!
Louis: In retrospect, it was disrespectful to my dearest maman, I must admit!
Carrie: So you admit you killed her!
Louis: I'm afraid so. I had to!
Louis: You see, I wasn't lying when I said we had no money left in our coffers... Which is why I came up with the brilliant idea to turn Château Pompette into a luxury bed and breakfast!
Louis: You've seen my castle - people would sell their grandmother to experience the exquisite life of a noble, even for one night!
Louis: But my mother wasn't having any of it! She was too proud. Said there was no way she'd allow common riff-raff into her home!
Louis: But I could see no other way to prevent my esteemed family from going under. Nor for me to continue living the lifestyle to which I was accustomed. Which is why it was time for my poor maman to go.
Carrie: Alright, Mr d'Anjou. But the one thing I don't understand is why you had to kill her in such a grotesque way?
Louis: For the pure theatrics of it, of course! Also, I was sure that dispensing of her head in the kitchen would make you pin the murder on our sultry cook!
Carrie (showing her badge): Well, I'm afraid your plan didn't work. Louis d'Anjou, you're under arrest!
Hugo: Simone Lemaitre, you're under arrest for the murder of Charles Pilsnerfeld!
Simone: You think I murdered Charles?! Why on earth would I do that?
Simone: I may be doing all the design work at Chior, but killing a fashion figurehead like Charles is a good way to run a stiletto through the heart of our brand!
Hugo: But we know you were planning to take over Chior, and you were going to add your initials to the logo!
Hugo: That definitely implies that you would replace him as the figurehead of the brand!
Hugo: And I'm sure Pilsnerfeld wouldn't have gone without a fight! Which explains why you had to get him out of the way!
Simone: I didn't kill Charles to get him "out of the way," I did it to get what was promised to me!
Hugo: He promised you the company?
Simone: He promised me EVERYTHING! He knew I was doing all the work...
Simone: ... and he admitted that after spending so much time on Chior's evolution, I had a better eye for what Chior was, and where it should be going.
Simone: So he agreed that in the event of his death, I would obtain complete control of Chior, in every capacity.
Hugo: And you killed him to trigger your inheritance of the company?! A will is not a free ticket to murder!
Simone: I had to kill Charles, or that damn cat was going to steal my rightful inheritance!
Hugo: I'm sorry, but... did you say "cat" and "steal your inheritance"?
Simone: Yes! Charles was fickle, and when he saw the Chior logo I designed with my initials, he decided he didn't want me in his will anymore.
Simone: He said he would revise it so that Chouquette would inherit everything!
Simone: Have you ever heard anything so absurd?! A cat inheriting a fashion brand!
Simone: So of course I had to kill him while the will still said everything would be MINE! Chior is MY empire!
Hugo: <Name>, in light of these events, I hope Jérémy eventually found Chouquette!
Simone: Chouquette is missing? Ha! Looks like that cat won't be inheriting anything, either!
Hugo: For the moment, your capture was the most important of the two! Madame Lemaitre, you're under arrest!
Simone: You think I murdered Charles?! Why on earth would I do that?
Simone: I may be doing all the design work at Chior, but killing a fashion figurehead like Charles is a good way to run a stiletto through the heart of our brand!
Hugo: But we know you were planning to take over Chior, and you were going to add your initials to the logo!
Hugo: That definitely implies that you would replace him as the figurehead of the brand!
Hugo: And I'm sure Pilsnerfeld wouldn't have gone without a fight! Which explains why you had to get him out of the way!
Simone: I didn't kill Charles to get him "out of the way," I did it to get what was promised to me!
Hugo: He promised you the company?
Simone: He promised me EVERYTHING! He knew I was doing all the work...
Simone: ... and he admitted that after spending so much time on Chior's evolution, I had a better eye for what Chior was, and where it should be going.
Simone: So he agreed that in the event of his death, I would obtain complete control of Chior, in every capacity.
Hugo: And you killed him to trigger your inheritance of the company?! A will is not a free ticket to murder!
Simone: I had to kill Charles, or that damn cat was going to steal my rightful inheritance!
Hugo: I'm sorry, but... did you say "cat" and "steal your inheritance"?
Simone: Yes! Charles was fickle, and when he saw the Chior logo I designed with my initials, he decided he didn't want me in his will anymore.
Simone: He said he would revise it so that Chouquette would inherit everything!
Simone: Have you ever heard anything so absurd?! A cat inheriting a fashion brand!
Simone: So of course I had to kill him while the will still said everything would be MINE! Chior is MY empire!
Hugo: <Name>, in light of these events, I hope Jérémy eventually found Chouquette!
Simone: Chouquette is missing? Ha! Looks like that cat won't be inheriting anything, either!
Hugo: For the moment, your capture was the most important of the two! Madame Lemaitre, you're under arrest!
Attraction
The Show Must Go On
High Commissioner Delacroix: Monsieur Lelarge, you're under arrest for the murder of Sabine Diamant!
Lelarge (laughing): Ha! You must be joking. Why would I kill my star dancer?
High Commissioner Delacroix: You tell us. But what we do know is that you took her by surprise while she was rehearsing her opening act.
High Commissioner Delacroix: There was a struggle, wasn't there? She tried to grab onto you as you pushed her into the snake's tank and you pulled off one of her gloves in the process!
High Commissioner Delacroix: You knew Sabine falling into the tank would startle the snake into attacking, didn't you?
Lelarge: I was counting on its killer instincts to kick in!
High Commissioner Delacroix: So you admit it - you killed Sabine! But why? All because she kept asking for a raise?
Lelarge: That was only the start of it, <Rank> <Name>!
Lelarge: I gave Sabine raise after raise, hoping it'd be enough to keep her happy.
Lelarge: But then I got wind of some plan she'd cooked up with the other girls.
Lelarge: Sabine was planning on taking the money she'd squirreled away from her raises...
Lelarge: ... to start her own cabaret with all of my dancers!
Lelarge: Can you imagine, <Rank> <Name>? If Sabine left and took all the other girls with her?
Lelarge: I've spent the past 40 years working to make the Popotin Rouge the heart and soul of Montmartre!
Lelarge: I couldn't bear to watch it all disappear before my eyes, <Rank> <Name>!
High Commissioner Delacroix: Tell it to a judge, Monsieur Lelarge. You're under arrest!
Beastly BehaviorLelarge (laughing): Ha! You must be joking. Why would I kill my star dancer?
High Commissioner Delacroix: You tell us. But what we do know is that you took her by surprise while she was rehearsing her opening act.
High Commissioner Delacroix: There was a struggle, wasn't there? She tried to grab onto you as you pushed her into the snake's tank and you pulled off one of her gloves in the process!
High Commissioner Delacroix: You knew Sabine falling into the tank would startle the snake into attacking, didn't you?
Lelarge: I was counting on its killer instincts to kick in!
High Commissioner Delacroix: So you admit it - you killed Sabine! But why? All because she kept asking for a raise?
Lelarge: That was only the start of it, <Rank> <Name>!
Lelarge: I gave Sabine raise after raise, hoping it'd be enough to keep her happy.
Lelarge: But then I got wind of some plan she'd cooked up with the other girls.
Lelarge: Sabine was planning on taking the money she'd squirreled away from her raises...
Lelarge: ... to start her own cabaret with all of my dancers!
Lelarge: Can you imagine, <Rank> <Name>? If Sabine left and took all the other girls with her?
Lelarge: I've spent the past 40 years working to make the Popotin Rouge the heart and soul of Montmartre!
Lelarge: I couldn't bear to watch it all disappear before my eyes, <Rank> <Name>!
High Commissioner Delacroix: Tell it to a judge, Monsieur Lelarge. You're under arrest!
Carrie (showing her badge): Ms Kloss, we're placing you under arrest for the murder of Jackson Peacock! You have the right to remain silent-
Kiki: You expect me to remain silent after such a heinous accusation? Quelle bande d'imbéciles!
Carrie: If we're such imbeciles, then how did we figure out that you stabbed Peacock using a collector's item dagger? A dagger that you discarded at your favorite Oh La Vache café?
Kiki (sweating): I... um...
Carrie: And the scooter you drove to his apartment on must be well-oiled, since we found traces of your engine lubricant all over his wounds!
Carrie: But what we don't understand is what drove you to rip off your victim's brooch and smash it to pieces after murdering him?
Kiki: Because that despicable man HUMILIATED me!
Carrie: You mean with all that sugar daddy business?
Kiki: Oh, that was just the beginning, <Rank> <Name>!
Kiki: Soon after we met on the Sugarpapa website, Jackson told me he needed a spousal visa so he could live and work in France...
Kiki: ... So he made me an offer. He said he'd look after me financially in exchange for a marriage of convenience.
Kiki: I wasn't going to say no to his money, so I agreed! But as soon as he got his visa, Jackson dumped me and filed for divorce!
Kiki: A divorcée at 32! Can you imagine anything more shameful?!
Carrie: But surely if he divorced you, he'd have lost his visa?
Kiki: He told me he'd managed to bribe the right people within the immigration department by that point, so nothing would have happened to him!
Kiki: Anyway, I got so frustrated that I went to Jackson's apartment to give him a piece of my mind, but he just laughed and told me to stop acting like a spoilt puppy.
Kiki: So, in a fit of rage I took my dagger out of my purse and, before I knew it, I'd stabbed him straight through the heart!
Carrie: And I'm afraid that you're now going straight into custody, Ms Kloss.
Dressed to be KilledKiki: You expect me to remain silent after such a heinous accusation? Quelle bande d'imbéciles!
Carrie: If we're such imbeciles, then how did we figure out that you stabbed Peacock using a collector's item dagger? A dagger that you discarded at your favorite Oh La Vache café?
Kiki (sweating): I... um...
Carrie: And the scooter you drove to his apartment on must be well-oiled, since we found traces of your engine lubricant all over his wounds!
Carrie: But what we don't understand is what drove you to rip off your victim's brooch and smash it to pieces after murdering him?
Kiki: Because that despicable man HUMILIATED me!
Carrie: You mean with all that sugar daddy business?
Kiki: Oh, that was just the beginning, <Rank> <Name>!
Kiki: Soon after we met on the Sugarpapa website, Jackson told me he needed a spousal visa so he could live and work in France...
Kiki: ... So he made me an offer. He said he'd look after me financially in exchange for a marriage of convenience.
Kiki: I wasn't going to say no to his money, so I agreed! But as soon as he got his visa, Jackson dumped me and filed for divorce!
Kiki: A divorcée at 32! Can you imagine anything more shameful?!
Carrie: But surely if he divorced you, he'd have lost his visa?
Kiki: He told me he'd managed to bribe the right people within the immigration department by that point, so nothing would have happened to him!
Kiki: Anyway, I got so frustrated that I went to Jackson's apartment to give him a piece of my mind, but he just laughed and told me to stop acting like a spoilt puppy.
Kiki: So, in a fit of rage I took my dagger out of my purse and, before I knew it, I'd stabbed him straight through the heart!
Carrie: And I'm afraid that you're now going straight into custody, Ms Kloss.
Hugo: Didier Soucy, you're under arrest for the murder of Justine Collier!
Didier: What?! Murder? Quelle idée! Where did you get that crazy idea? What kind of deviant do you think I am?
Hugo: Well, we know you lied to us about going to Voyeur. And we know you were in love with Justine.
Didier: Exactement! Why would I murder a woman I love?
Hugo: You said yourself, she didn't pay attention to you.
Hugo: But if she ignored you, we have to ask...
Hugo: ... did you get her to dress like the character from that sexy comic book, or did you change her clothes after you killed her?
Didier: You take that back! "Zizi dans le Métro" is not just a "sexy comic book," it's a classic! C'est un chef d'oeuvre!
Didier: And Justine was the perfect likeness to Désirée...
Didier: She wore the clothes willingly, after she made me agree to pay her 1,000 euros.
Hugo: You agreed to pay her 1,000 euros for that?
Didier: Of course I did, but I'm no fool! I was able to convince her to let me pay her after she put the clothes on.
Didier: She put on everything but the headband. But that's the most important part!
Didier: She knew that would make me angry... She WANTED to make me angry!
Hugo: And then what did you do, Didier?
Didier: She stood there, taunting me. I sniffed the bottle of poppers I bought in Voyeur to help me calm down.
Didier: But it didn't make me calm, it made me more angry, and more determined to see her wear that headband!
Didier: So I grabbed her by the neck to hold her still! My grip was so tight, she didn't even fight back!
Didier (sweating): Of course, that isn't what I wanted! I never meant to KILL her!
Hugo: Well, you did kill her, Monsieur Soucy! And now you'll be tried for murder! You're under arrest!
Die in the SkyDidier: What?! Murder? Quelle idée! Where did you get that crazy idea? What kind of deviant do you think I am?
Hugo: Well, we know you lied to us about going to Voyeur. And we know you were in love with Justine.
Didier: Exactement! Why would I murder a woman I love?
Hugo: You said yourself, she didn't pay attention to you.
Hugo: But if she ignored you, we have to ask...
Hugo: ... did you get her to dress like the character from that sexy comic book, or did you change her clothes after you killed her?
Didier: You take that back! "Zizi dans le Métro" is not just a "sexy comic book," it's a classic! C'est un chef d'oeuvre!
Didier: And Justine was the perfect likeness to Désirée...
Didier: She wore the clothes willingly, after she made me agree to pay her 1,000 euros.
Hugo: You agreed to pay her 1,000 euros for that?
Didier: Of course I did, but I'm no fool! I was able to convince her to let me pay her after she put the clothes on.
Didier: She put on everything but the headband. But that's the most important part!
Didier: She knew that would make me angry... She WANTED to make me angry!
Hugo: And then what did you do, Didier?
Didier: She stood there, taunting me. I sniffed the bottle of poppers I bought in Voyeur to help me calm down.
Didier: But it didn't make me calm, it made me more angry, and more determined to see her wear that headband!
Didier: So I grabbed her by the neck to hold her still! My grip was so tight, she didn't even fight back!
Didier (sweating): Of course, that isn't what I wanted! I never meant to KILL her!
Hugo: Well, you did kill her, Monsieur Soucy! And now you'll be tried for murder! You're under arrest!
Carrie (showing her badge): Mr Badu, you're under arrest for the murder of Chidi Udoka! What do you have to say for yourself?
Kasongo: That you must be a few crumbs short of a biscuit, honey!
Carrie: Nice try. But we know you smashed Mr Udoka's champagne flute, cutting yourself in the process...
Carrie: ... then you plunged the stem of the glass into his eye, killing him instantly!
Carrie: You disposed of the other half of the glass in the trash, then went to the bar, where you wrote a note expressing remorse for your actions!
Kasongo: I AM sorry for what I did! I just lashed out!
Carrie: So you admit to killing Mr Udoka. But surely you didn't commit such a vicious crime out of fear of being ridiculed?
Kasongo: No, I killed him because he refused to acknowledge me as his son!
Carrie: His son?! You mean the victim was your father?
Kasongo: I only found out myself recently... My mother always told me my dad died before I was born!
Kasongo: But a few weeks ago, she decided to tell me the truth: my mother had an affair with Chidi and got pregnant with me!
Kasongo: Chidi had no idea. My mother said it was better that way.
Kasongo: But I've spent my whole life wishing for a father figure, <Rank> <Name>. I couldn't let an opportunity like that slip through my fingers!
Kasongo: When I realized that Chidi was on the same flight as me, I seized my chance. I told him who I was, and that I'd love for us to have a father-son relationship.
Kasongo: But he replied that he'd never acknowledge a gay man as his son!
Kasongo: I... I just lost it, <Rank> <Name>. I saw red and the next thing I knew, he was dead!
Carrie: Mr Badu, nobody should be rejected by a parent because of their sexuality. But murder wasn't the answer! I'm afraid you're under arrest!
Juggling With DeathKasongo: That you must be a few crumbs short of a biscuit, honey!
Carrie: Nice try. But we know you smashed Mr Udoka's champagne flute, cutting yourself in the process...
Carrie: ... then you plunged the stem of the glass into his eye, killing him instantly!
Carrie: You disposed of the other half of the glass in the trash, then went to the bar, where you wrote a note expressing remorse for your actions!
Kasongo: I AM sorry for what I did! I just lashed out!
Carrie: So you admit to killing Mr Udoka. But surely you didn't commit such a vicious crime out of fear of being ridiculed?
Kasongo: No, I killed him because he refused to acknowledge me as his son!
Carrie: His son?! You mean the victim was your father?
Kasongo: I only found out myself recently... My mother always told me my dad died before I was born!
Kasongo: But a few weeks ago, she decided to tell me the truth: my mother had an affair with Chidi and got pregnant with me!
Kasongo: Chidi had no idea. My mother said it was better that way.
Kasongo: But I've spent my whole life wishing for a father figure, <Rank> <Name>. I couldn't let an opportunity like that slip through my fingers!
Kasongo: When I realized that Chidi was on the same flight as me, I seized my chance. I told him who I was, and that I'd love for us to have a father-son relationship.
Kasongo: But he replied that he'd never acknowledge a gay man as his son!
Kasongo: I... I just lost it, <Rank> <Name>. I saw red and the next thing I knew, he was dead!
Carrie: Mr Badu, nobody should be rejected by a parent because of their sexuality. But murder wasn't the answer! I'm afraid you're under arrest!
Hugo (showing his badge): Howard Stacy, you are under arrest for the murder of Rémi Roy!
Howard: You cannot be serious! He almost murdered ME with that damned elephant!
Hugo: That's probably how you got such sweaty palms and perspired all over the juggling club you used to bash the poor fellow's brains out!
Howard: I don't know what you're talking about-
Hugo: After which you ripped his necklace off his dying body!
Howard (sweating): I did no such thing...
Hugo: Monsieur Stacy, enough of your denials! The evidence clearly points to you being Roy's killer!
Hugo: But what we don't understand is why you did it! Surely it wasn't because of his little prank today?
Howard: Of course not - it was to save Stacy's! What do you think?!
Hugo: Huh? What on earth would Rémi Roy have to do with saving your department store!
Howard: Dang, I shouldn't have opened my big mouth! Guess I have no choice but to come clean...
Howard: The truth is, Stacy's is a hair's breadth away from bankruptcy! I've had to cut costs everywhere I can to save it!
Howard: As much as I was against it at first, one of those cuts was procuring fur on the... black market... And Roy was my supplier!
Hugo: Wait, so you're saying that Rémi Roy was supplying you with illegal fur? Might this fur have come from animals that had been smuggled into Paris?
Howard: As much as I've wanted to turn a blind eye to it, I'm afraid there's no doubt that the fur was the product of animal trafficking!
Howard: At first, Rémi was satisfied with the extra money he was getting from our... transactions. But all of a sudden he told me his "conscience" would no longer let him follow through with the deal!
Howard: As if that jerk had a conscience to speak of! He only wanted more money! But I couldn't afford to pay him, so he threatened to go to the police about my involvement in the racket!
Howard: I'd pretty much resigned myself to being caught when I saw Roy puttering about under the circus big top on his own while I was on my way to meet Antoine Macaron.
Howard: When I saw that there wasn't another soul in sight, my brain just went on auto-pilot. I took my chance to save my own skin - and my legacy!
Howard: I grabbed a juggling club I found lying around, snuck up on Roy from behind, and bashed him on the head again and again and again until he stopped moving.
Hugo: Well, committing murder was a sure way to destroy any legacy you might have had, Monsieur Stacy. You're under arrest!
Howard: You cannot be serious! He almost murdered ME with that damned elephant!
Hugo: That's probably how you got such sweaty palms and perspired all over the juggling club you used to bash the poor fellow's brains out!
Howard: I don't know what you're talking about-
Hugo: After which you ripped his necklace off his dying body!
Howard (sweating): I did no such thing...
Hugo: Monsieur Stacy, enough of your denials! The evidence clearly points to you being Roy's killer!
Hugo: But what we don't understand is why you did it! Surely it wasn't because of his little prank today?
Howard: Of course not - it was to save Stacy's! What do you think?!
Hugo: Huh? What on earth would Rémi Roy have to do with saving your department store!
Howard: Dang, I shouldn't have opened my big mouth! Guess I have no choice but to come clean...
Howard: The truth is, Stacy's is a hair's breadth away from bankruptcy! I've had to cut costs everywhere I can to save it!
Howard: As much as I was against it at first, one of those cuts was procuring fur on the... black market... And Roy was my supplier!
Hugo: Wait, so you're saying that Rémi Roy was supplying you with illegal fur? Might this fur have come from animals that had been smuggled into Paris?
Howard: As much as I've wanted to turn a blind eye to it, I'm afraid there's no doubt that the fur was the product of animal trafficking!
Howard: At first, Rémi was satisfied with the extra money he was getting from our... transactions. But all of a sudden he told me his "conscience" would no longer let him follow through with the deal!
Howard: As if that jerk had a conscience to speak of! He only wanted more money! But I couldn't afford to pay him, so he threatened to go to the police about my involvement in the racket!
Howard: I'd pretty much resigned myself to being caught when I saw Roy puttering about under the circus big top on his own while I was on my way to meet Antoine Macaron.
Howard: When I saw that there wasn't another soul in sight, my brain just went on auto-pilot. I took my chance to save my own skin - and my legacy!
Howard: I grabbed a juggling club I found lying around, snuck up on Roy from behind, and bashed him on the head again and again and again until he stopped moving.
Hugo: Well, committing murder was a sure way to destroy any legacy you might have had, Monsieur Stacy. You're under arrest!
Obsession
A Priceless Murder
Carrie: Mr Hammerstein, you're under arrest for the murder of Jean-Yves Lemarchand!
Mark: What?! But why would I murder a collaborator on an art piece?
Carrie: Our investigation showed that Lemarchand was a difficult person to work with. Clearly the same goes for your art project, too, knowing he swapped out your valuable opals for fakes.
Carrie: Maybe he just pushed you too far, and you decided to poison his coffee to get back at him?
Mark: It wasn't to get back at him! He refused to return my very valuable black opals even after I discovered what he'd done!
Carrie: So then you killed him?
Mark: No, I tried to cut a deal with him. I suggest that we make even more skulls, using his fake opals.
Mark: And we could sell those fake pieces at the show, where the skulls with the real opals would be on display! Fake stones or not, my fans would pay plenty!
Mark: But Lemarchand had already sold off my real opals! He had my future by the stones! I'd be ruined!
Mark: It was the ultimate double-cross! So I pretended to forgive him. I told him we'd use the fake opals and go forward with the project.
Carrie: And THEN you murdered him!
Mark: Yes! The ultimate poetic justice! I put cyanide in his coffee, and I planned to come back after he was dead to collect his head!
Mark: His skull would become the centerpiece of my show! It was the only way he could make up for what he'd done!
Carrie: Well, Mr Hammerstein, French law doesn't even allow an eye for an eye, so your "head for some opals" transaction won't fly! You're under arrest!
Inglorious BatardMark: What?! But why would I murder a collaborator on an art piece?
Carrie: Our investigation showed that Lemarchand was a difficult person to work with. Clearly the same goes for your art project, too, knowing he swapped out your valuable opals for fakes.
Carrie: Maybe he just pushed you too far, and you decided to poison his coffee to get back at him?
Mark: It wasn't to get back at him! He refused to return my very valuable black opals even after I discovered what he'd done!
Carrie: So then you killed him?
Mark: No, I tried to cut a deal with him. I suggest that we make even more skulls, using his fake opals.
Mark: And we could sell those fake pieces at the show, where the skulls with the real opals would be on display! Fake stones or not, my fans would pay plenty!
Mark: But Lemarchand had already sold off my real opals! He had my future by the stones! I'd be ruined!
Mark: It was the ultimate double-cross! So I pretended to forgive him. I told him we'd use the fake opals and go forward with the project.
Carrie: And THEN you murdered him!
Mark: Yes! The ultimate poetic justice! I put cyanide in his coffee, and I planned to come back after he was dead to collect his head!
Mark: His skull would become the centerpiece of my show! It was the only way he could make up for what he'd done!
Carrie: Well, Mr Hammerstein, French law doesn't even allow an eye for an eye, so your "head for some opals" transaction won't fly! You're under arrest!
Hugo: Captain Clapet, you're under arrest for the murder of Edouard Batard!
Marcel: Me? Impossible! I couldn't even hurt a fly!
Hugo: The evidence says otherwise! You took your right hand and dipped your finger in beer to write that you wished the victim dead!
Marcel: I am sure, as a politician, Batard received a few hundred threats a day! It goes with the job...
Hugo: Ah, but he didn't receive notes to meet secretly in cemeteries every day! We know you set up that rendezvous! You left crumbs from your dog's food all over the note!
Marcel: Oh là là.........
Marcel: I won't bother lying to you, <Name>... you'll see right through me anyway!
Marcel: I did kill Edouard Batard!
Hugo: Was it the blackmail? You had to make it stop?
Marcel: No! After I paid him off, he claimed that my boat was a danger. Batard wanted to scrap her! Can you imagine the love of my life in some junk yard?!
Marcel: I could never do that to her! So I moved onto my boat full time to prove that it was perfectly safe!
Hugo: But why did he want to get rid of your boat? What was in it for him?
Marcel: It was all part of his plan to take over the project for rebuilding Notre-Dame! He wanted complete control of this part of the Seine!
Marcel: But one night I heard strange sounds. Batard had sent some men to sabotage my boat! I almost lost her!
Marcel: I decided to settle the issue man to man and called him to neutral territory: Père Lachaise.
Marcel: When we met, an argument started. I said I'd tell the media what he'd done! Batard laughed in my face and said I'd be in the Seine under my boat before I could tell a soul!
Marcel: I saw red and grabbed that tour guide flag. Then I plunged it into his cold, cold heart!
Hugo: And for this crime, you will never take the love of your life for another cruise, Captain! You're under arrest!
Queen of HeartsMarcel: Me? Impossible! I couldn't even hurt a fly!
Hugo: The evidence says otherwise! You took your right hand and dipped your finger in beer to write that you wished the victim dead!
Marcel: I am sure, as a politician, Batard received a few hundred threats a day! It goes with the job...
Hugo: Ah, but he didn't receive notes to meet secretly in cemeteries every day! We know you set up that rendezvous! You left crumbs from your dog's food all over the note!
Marcel: Oh là là.........
Marcel: I won't bother lying to you, <Name>... you'll see right through me anyway!
Marcel: I did kill Edouard Batard!
Hugo: Was it the blackmail? You had to make it stop?
Marcel: No! After I paid him off, he claimed that my boat was a danger. Batard wanted to scrap her! Can you imagine the love of my life in some junk yard?!
Marcel: I could never do that to her! So I moved onto my boat full time to prove that it was perfectly safe!
Hugo: But why did he want to get rid of your boat? What was in it for him?
Marcel: It was all part of his plan to take over the project for rebuilding Notre-Dame! He wanted complete control of this part of the Seine!
Marcel: But one night I heard strange sounds. Batard had sent some men to sabotage my boat! I almost lost her!
Marcel: I decided to settle the issue man to man and called him to neutral territory: Père Lachaise.
Marcel: When we met, an argument started. I said I'd tell the media what he'd done! Batard laughed in my face and said I'd be in the Seine under my boat before I could tell a soul!
Marcel: I saw red and grabbed that tour guide flag. Then I plunged it into his cold, cold heart!
Hugo: And for this crime, you will never take the love of your life for another cruise, Captain! You're under arrest!
Carrie: Mélodie, it was you? You murdered Lola du Maurier?!
Mélodie: Haha, I must be hallucinating from too many Scrappy Snacks, <Rank> <Name>, because I thought I just heard you accusing me of murder?
Carrie: You heard right! And speaking of your drugs - we found them, covered in your face glitter!
Mélodie: Oh yeah - that stuff gets everywhere!
Carrie: You didn't do a great job of hiding your bow and arrows either, since we have both in our possession!
Mélodie (sweating): Oh, purée...!
Carrie: And by the way, your bow had traces of your blood on it, so there's no point in playing dumb. We know you killed Lola!
Mélodie: Awwwwww! Fine, you got me! I murdered Lola. But if I hadn't, she'd have ruined my incredible masterplan!
Carrie: And what masterplan is that exactly?
Mélodie: I guess I'm going to jail, so I might as well tell you.
Mélodie: You remember the special function I developed for the hearts feature on the Luvver app, right?
Carrie: Yes, the one where the hearts secretly measure facial symmetry to give a higher rating to better-looking people!
Mélodie: Exactly! So these perfect, gorgeous-looking people will show up first and move frequently, giving them more of a chance to be seen by other singletons using the app!
Mélodie: But the truth is that there's another cute little algorithm that I didn't tell you about...
Mélodie: What really happens is that all these hotties get put into their own special category, and then this algorithm makes sure that they only get matched to people they're totally incompatible with!
Carrie: Why on earth would you want them to match with incompatible people?
Mélodie: So that they can NEVER be happy!
Mélodie: <Rank> <Name>, all my life I've been hurt and dumped too many times by beautiful men - and women!
Mélodie: These stunners think they're above us, that they can treat us like dog caca... Well not anymore - thanks to me and my genius app!
Mélodie: At least, that's what I thought until that silly Lola girl took a peek at my laptop when I wasn't looking and uncovered my plan.
Mélodie: The little snitch told me she was going to reveal everything during today's event! As if!
Carrie: Mélodie, I'm sorry you've been hurt so bad in the past, but taking revenge in such a way - and committing murder - are unacceptable! You're under arrest!
Mélodie: Haha, I must be hallucinating from too many Scrappy Snacks, <Rank> <Name>, because I thought I just heard you accusing me of murder?
Carrie: You heard right! And speaking of your drugs - we found them, covered in your face glitter!
Mélodie: Oh yeah - that stuff gets everywhere!
Carrie: You didn't do a great job of hiding your bow and arrows either, since we have both in our possession!
Mélodie (sweating): Oh, purée...!
Carrie: And by the way, your bow had traces of your blood on it, so there's no point in playing dumb. We know you killed Lola!
Mélodie: Awwwwww! Fine, you got me! I murdered Lola. But if I hadn't, she'd have ruined my incredible masterplan!
Carrie: And what masterplan is that exactly?
Mélodie: I guess I'm going to jail, so I might as well tell you.
Mélodie: You remember the special function I developed for the hearts feature on the Luvver app, right?
Carrie: Yes, the one where the hearts secretly measure facial symmetry to give a higher rating to better-looking people!
Mélodie: Exactly! So these perfect, gorgeous-looking people will show up first and move frequently, giving them more of a chance to be seen by other singletons using the app!
Mélodie: But the truth is that there's another cute little algorithm that I didn't tell you about...
Mélodie: What really happens is that all these hotties get put into their own special category, and then this algorithm makes sure that they only get matched to people they're totally incompatible with!
Carrie: Why on earth would you want them to match with incompatible people?
Mélodie: So that they can NEVER be happy!
Mélodie: <Rank> <Name>, all my life I've been hurt and dumped too many times by beautiful men - and women!
Mélodie: These stunners think they're above us, that they can treat us like dog caca... Well not anymore - thanks to me and my genius app!
Mélodie: At least, that's what I thought until that silly Lola girl took a peek at my laptop when I wasn't looking and uncovered my plan.
Mélodie: The little snitch told me she was going to reveal everything during today's event! As if!
Carrie: Mélodie, I'm sorry you've been hurt so bad in the past, but taking revenge in such a way - and committing murder - are unacceptable! You're under arrest!
Jealousy
Out with a Bang
Hugo: Noémie Leprince, you're under arrest for the murder of Céleste Alouest!
Noémie: You think I did that? I can't imagine how someone could've blown her up like that, let alone how I'd do it myself!
Hugo: For now, all we know is that you're the culprit. You'll have to be the one to explain why.
Noémie: Hugo, baby, I know you've got the hots for me. There must be something in your heart that knows I'm innocent.
Hugo: I was attracted to you, it's true. But I've got to be honest, Noémie, murder is a big turn-off.
Noémie (sweating): But I didn't mean to become a murderer!
Hugo: What do you mean? What did you think you were doing when you made Céleste swallow that cesium pill?
Noémie: Macaron told me it would only make her sick!
Hugo: Antoine Macaron?! But he's in prison!
Noémie: Yes, and before he was arrested, he knew he would lose his circus to Céleste.
Noémie: He also knew that his daughter was having a soirée at her place, and that Céleste and I would be there.
Noémie: So just before he was arrested, he and a couple of thugs came to tell me that I had to get Céleste to take the pill.
Hugo: But why on earth did you accept?
Noémie: Macaron told me if I didn't do it, he'd make sure that I never model again!
Noémie: And he said the pill would just make Céleste sick enough that he could get his circus back under mob control. He didn't say she'd EXPLODE!
Noémie: I was so nervous, trying to figure out how to sneak the pill into her food. But then she said she had a headache, so I just gave it to her! It was so easy!
Noémie: And now I've KILLED someone! I'm a murderer!
Hugo: Yes, unfortunately you are, Noémie. And the court is going to have to look into Macaron's involvement.
Hugo: But I'm afraid we have to put you under arrest!
Slay it with FlowersNoémie: You think I did that? I can't imagine how someone could've blown her up like that, let alone how I'd do it myself!
Hugo: For now, all we know is that you're the culprit. You'll have to be the one to explain why.
Noémie: Hugo, baby, I know you've got the hots for me. There must be something in your heart that knows I'm innocent.
Hugo: I was attracted to you, it's true. But I've got to be honest, Noémie, murder is a big turn-off.
Noémie (sweating): But I didn't mean to become a murderer!
Hugo: What do you mean? What did you think you were doing when you made Céleste swallow that cesium pill?
Noémie: Macaron told me it would only make her sick!
Hugo: Antoine Macaron?! But he's in prison!
Noémie: Yes, and before he was arrested, he knew he would lose his circus to Céleste.
Noémie: He also knew that his daughter was having a soirée at her place, and that Céleste and I would be there.
Noémie: So just before he was arrested, he and a couple of thugs came to tell me that I had to get Céleste to take the pill.
Hugo: But why on earth did you accept?
Noémie: Macaron told me if I didn't do it, he'd make sure that I never model again!
Noémie: And he said the pill would just make Céleste sick enough that he could get his circus back under mob control. He didn't say she'd EXPLODE!
Noémie: I was so nervous, trying to figure out how to sneak the pill into her food. But then she said she had a headache, so I just gave it to her! It was so easy!
Noémie: And now I've KILLED someone! I'm a murderer!
Hugo: Yes, unfortunately you are, Noémie. And the court is going to have to look into Macaron's involvement.
Hugo: But I'm afraid we have to put you under arrest!
Carrie: Nicole Abitbol, you are under arrest for the murder of Willem Nieuwoudt!
Nicole: What?! No! I loved him!
Carrie: The evidence indicates otherwise! We know that you run at Luxembourg Gardens, conveniently near the crime scene!
Nicole: Me, and hundreds of other people! It's a big park!
Carrie: But we found traces of dust and pollen from that park mixed with bits of 3D printing plastic used to make the murder weapon!
Carrie: No other suspect had the opportunity you had to stealthily place the murder weapon in the bouquet!
Nicole: But the florist-
Carrie: Her DNA wasn't on the destroyed Fun Run t-shirt you left at Luxembourg Gardens, Ms Abitbol. Only you fit all the evidence!
Nicole: Damn you, <Rank> <Name>! I should've known I never had a chance to get away with this murder as soon as you questioned me!
Nicole: I did kill Willem Nieuwoudt. He was in our way and had to be eliminated!
Carrie: "Our way"? You plotted his death with others?
Nicole: My crew and I have been trying for months to kidnap Prince Amadou! But no matter what we tried, that mountain of man thwarted every attempt!
Nicole: It became clear that we would have to kill Willem to get to our prize.
Nicole: So I seduced Willem... it took some time to get under his armor, but I did!
Carrie: And for what? <Rank> <Name> caught you! You'll never see a centime of ransom for Prince Amadou now! You're under arrest!
Nicole: What?! No! I loved him!
Carrie: The evidence indicates otherwise! We know that you run at Luxembourg Gardens, conveniently near the crime scene!
Nicole: Me, and hundreds of other people! It's a big park!
Carrie: But we found traces of dust and pollen from that park mixed with bits of 3D printing plastic used to make the murder weapon!
Carrie: No other suspect had the opportunity you had to stealthily place the murder weapon in the bouquet!
Nicole: But the florist-
Carrie: Her DNA wasn't on the destroyed Fun Run t-shirt you left at Luxembourg Gardens, Ms Abitbol. Only you fit all the evidence!
Nicole: Damn you, <Rank> <Name>! I should've known I never had a chance to get away with this murder as soon as you questioned me!
Nicole: I did kill Willem Nieuwoudt. He was in our way and had to be eliminated!
Carrie: "Our way"? You plotted his death with others?
Nicole: My crew and I have been trying for months to kidnap Prince Amadou! But no matter what we tried, that mountain of man thwarted every attempt!
Nicole: It became clear that we would have to kill Willem to get to our prize.
Nicole: So I seduced Willem... it took some time to get under his armor, but I did!
Carrie: And for what? <Rank> <Name> caught you! You'll never see a centime of ransom for Prince Amadou now! You're under arrest!
Separation
Early Checkout
Hugo: Roland Nanty, I cannot believe you had the balls to murder the leader of the Parisian mob!
Roland: What the hell are you talking about? I didn't murder anything - except possibly my career!
Hugo: There's no use lying, man. Not only did we find the oil paints you used to write "Die Pig" on Macaron's chest and the magazine article...
Hugo: ... But we've also got the plastic bag you used to suffocate the man!
Roland (sweating): I... um...
Hugo: For a radio host, you seem rather at a loss of words, Nanty!
Roland: Alright, yes, I killed Macaron! But that pig deserved to die!
Hugo: Surely you didn't murder the fellow simply because he insulted you during his interview?
Roland: Oh, believe me, that was the only one injustice of many I have suffered at the hands of Macaron... ever since I was a teenager!
Hugo: Wait, what? You'll need to explain further, Nanty!
Roland: When I was fifteen, that scoundrel had a sordid affair with my mother, and then left her to deal with the consequences!
Roland: When my father found out, he abandoned us, and my family ended up destitute and homeless!
Roland: My mother asked Macaron for help, but he said he'd only do it in return for me becoming one of his pigeons and rats, and she one of his prostitutes!
Roland: Of course, we refused to pander to the bastard's demands. And I never forgave him. Everything I've done in my life has been leading up to the moment I could get my revenge.
Hugo: And that moment came today, I suppose.
Roland: Absolument. As soon as he agreed to an interview, I knew I'd never get a better chance.
Roland: Of course, Macaron didn't recognize me, Roland Nanty, as the little boy whose life he'd ruined. But he obviously knew about my marital issues... and his insults just intensified my desire to murder him!
Roland: As you know, I followed Macaron back to his hotel room. But unlike what I told you, it was easy to get past the reception staff.
Roland: I hadn't planned how I was going to kill Macaron, but when I saw all the BDSM paraphernalia in his room, I knew exactly what to do!
Roland: The mobster was quite inebriated on sake, so it was easy to jump on him and cover his face with my plastic bag. He died in utter agony!
Roland: Then I undressed him and handcuffed him to the bed like the pig he is, wrote the message on his chest, and left him to be found in such a humiliating manner!
Hugo (showing his badge): And now we've found you, and you're going straight into custody, Mr Nanty!
Roland: What the hell are you talking about? I didn't murder anything - except possibly my career!
Hugo: There's no use lying, man. Not only did we find the oil paints you used to write "Die Pig" on Macaron's chest and the magazine article...
Hugo: ... But we've also got the plastic bag you used to suffocate the man!
Roland (sweating): I... um...
Hugo: For a radio host, you seem rather at a loss of words, Nanty!
Roland: Alright, yes, I killed Macaron! But that pig deserved to die!
Hugo: Surely you didn't murder the fellow simply because he insulted you during his interview?
Roland: Oh, believe me, that was the only one injustice of many I have suffered at the hands of Macaron... ever since I was a teenager!
Hugo: Wait, what? You'll need to explain further, Nanty!
Roland: When I was fifteen, that scoundrel had a sordid affair with my mother, and then left her to deal with the consequences!
Roland: When my father found out, he abandoned us, and my family ended up destitute and homeless!
Roland: My mother asked Macaron for help, but he said he'd only do it in return for me becoming one of his pigeons and rats, and she one of his prostitutes!
Roland: Of course, we refused to pander to the bastard's demands. And I never forgave him. Everything I've done in my life has been leading up to the moment I could get my revenge.
Hugo: And that moment came today, I suppose.
Roland: Absolument. As soon as he agreed to an interview, I knew I'd never get a better chance.
Roland: Of course, Macaron didn't recognize me, Roland Nanty, as the little boy whose life he'd ruined. But he obviously knew about my marital issues... and his insults just intensified my desire to murder him!
Roland: As you know, I followed Macaron back to his hotel room. But unlike what I told you, it was easy to get past the reception staff.
Roland: I hadn't planned how I was going to kill Macaron, but when I saw all the BDSM paraphernalia in his room, I knew exactly what to do!
Roland: The mobster was quite inebriated on sake, so it was easy to jump on him and cover his face with my plastic bag. He died in utter agony!
Roland: Then I undressed him and handcuffed him to the bed like the pig he is, wrote the message on his chest, and left him to be found in such a humiliating manner!
Hugo (showing his badge): And now we've found you, and you're going straight into custody, Mr Nanty!
Engagement
It All Comes to a Head
- Carrie: Eleonora Macaron, I'm glad you and Cody broke up, because I had no idea you'd turn out to be a murderer!
Eleonora: What are you talking about?! You seriously think I cut off Samy Malouf's head?
Carrie: Yes, we do. It's funny, we thought you were cleverer than your father. It wasn't just because he wanted to cut ties with the Pigeons and Rats.
Carrie: Yet here you are, having murdered someone for something so petty as a minor business dispute... and to top it all off, getting caught!
Eleonora: You think I'M the fool here? I've never stopped being loyal to my father! I've been playing you all this whole time!
Carrie: You mean everything you told us about disapproving of what he stood for was a lie?! How could you do that to my brother?! He was in love with you!
Eleonora: He was just a plaything! I'd have got rid of him long ago if it wasn't for his insider ties to the police.
Eleonora: And as I told you once before, <Name>, family is family. You couldn't even begin to wrap your head around our master plan to take over France!
Carrie: Wait a minute... does this have something to do with Malouf's plan to release a deepfake video of the French president?
Eleonora: Ha! Samy could never have conceived of such a brilliant scheme! This was all MY idea!
Carrie: What?! But what have you got against President Roquefort?
Eleonora: Nothing except we wanted him out of the way so my father could become president!
Eleonora: I knew the technology existed to create false evidence defaming the President, he just needed someone with access to such technology.
Eleonora: That's where Samy came in! I persuaded my dad to cut a deal with Malouf: he'd invest heavily in Luvver in exchange for a deepfake to bring down the President!
Carrie: But then your dad was killed, and Samy had nothing to do with it. So why would you decapitate him?
Eleonora: Because Samy got a big head! He decided that since he'd paved the way to defame the President...
Eleonora: ... Samy was going to become President himself!
Eleonora: There's no way I was going to let him take advantage of MY genius idea! If my father couldn't become president, Samy certainly wouldn't!
Carrie: So you followed Samy into the Louvre and cut off his head?
Eleonora: Samy was scared, because he knew that the Pigeons and Rats were following him. So he spent time in museums and places where there were lots of people.
Eleonora: But we Macarons aren't scared to send a message loud and clear!
Eleonora: And to show just how much I am Antoine Macaron's daughter, I took that ceremonial sword and gave Samy a political execution worthy of a president!
Carrie: Well, Eleonora, it certainly seems like you've followed in your late mobster father's footsteps...
Carrie: And just like your dad did, you'll be going to prison! You're under arrest!
