"Hey guys, your boy Ozymandias here with a new work for ye all to look on. Don't forget to Like, Comment, and Despair!"
Writer: Okay, I got the headline, "Pedro Pascal joins Wonder Woman 2."
Editor: No, no, no, you gotta tickle their balls a little bit!
Writer: Uhhh... okay. "Game of Thrones actor joins Wonder W—"
Editor: Ehhh...
Writer: Superhero film?
Editor: Tickle them more!
Writer: Actor joins film?!
Editor: How about this: "YOU WON'T BELIEVE actor joins film!"
Writer: Why wouldn't they believe an actor joined a film?
Editor: Ah! Wait! "YOU WON'T BELIEVE."
Writer: "You won't believe?" Won't believe wh—that-that doesn't mean anything! Why would... and eighty thousand people shared it on Facebook.
Thomas Dipshit, Facebook user: I mean, it said I wouldn't believe it.
— ProZD, "clickbait"
Thirteen years later, Chris Chibnall has a crack at establishing his vision of Who. It opens with Ryan Sinclair vlogging on his YouTube channel. Finally, a Doctor Who companion that I can relate to - a humble British Youtuber. But bro, what kind of Youtubing are you doing? RyanS? What kind of terrible name is that? You need to work on your branding, you just uploaded a video called "Hey"? You could have made that a lot more clickbait. How about "MY NAN FELL OFF A CRANE AND DIED - STORYTIME/IPHONE GIVEAWAY". THAT would get you views.
— Nit Pix, "Why Doctor Who is a Mess"
Tycho: There's going to be an article titled: "Could Loki finally MCU Marvel Infinity Stones Tesseract Space Stone?"
Gabe: Do you think an algorithm is writing these for... other algorithms? Or do you think a human person is actually typing these out!?
Tycho: I find both scenarios equally terrifying.
Gabe: Do you think an algorithm is writing these for... other algorithms? Or do you think a human person is actually typing these out!?
Tycho: I find both scenarios equally terrifying.
Brian: (finishes typing) Alright! Guess who just wrote "Ten Facts You Didn't Know About Jerry Seinfeld"?
Stewie: Is one that he's Jewish?
Brian: (backspaces) Guess who just wrote "Nine Facts You Didn't Know About Jerry Seinfeld"?
Stewie: He likes classic cars?
Brian: (backspaces again) Guess who just wrote "Eight Facts You Didn't Know About Jerry Seinfeld"?
Stewie: You probably said he was Jewish a second time.
Brian: Alright, new article. "One Fact You Didn't Know About Michael Richards..."
Stewie: You can't use that word in an article.
Brian: And I will find a new show to write about!
—Family Guy, "Pawtucket Pat"
Badger: That's like the worst YouTube clickbait title you could ever imagine. "Arkham Knight saves Master Chief from Elmo in front of Shrek while carrying [the] gnome?"
Heavenly: "Not clickbait gone wild! Sponsored by Raid: Shadow Legends? Buy a Ridge Wallet?"
Heavenly: "Not clickbait gone wild! Sponsored by Raid: Shadow Legends? Buy a Ridge Wallet?"
