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Quotes / Badass Decay

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"You know, I was cool before I met y'all."
Charles Gunn, Angel ("Waiting in the Wings")

"Duke (Duke!) You used to be cool
But you gotta make your mind up if you're modern or old school
(Duke!) You used to be cool
Learn to kick ass again and get rid of that lame 2-weapon rule
And then the world might not be so cruel..."

Captain Hook: Smee, I don't understand. Why doesn't he fly? Is he not Peter Pan?
Smee: He's Peter Pan, all right, Captain. He's just been away from Neverland so long, his mind's been junk-tified. He's forgotten everything.


"I think that once the writers saw that there was sort of a comedic flair, they began writing to it, to which I would say 'Please don’t do that. I can undercut, I can spoof, I can give a wink and a nod. But if you start writing me comedic, I don’t have anywhere to go.'"

"Wolverine gets airsick. Ladies and gentlemen, the pussification has begun."

Matt: Wolverine cries a damn ton in this thing.
Chris: He is no more or less upset about Jean than he was about Professor X, which pretty much confirms every bit of fan-fiction on the Internet.
—Chris Sims and Matt Wilson on X-Men: The Last Stand

Max: Terminator 3 has a thing in it that I kinda like...
Jay: Was it the "Talk to the hand" part? 'Cuz that's hilarious.
Max: No, it's the star glasses.
Jay: The star glasses. 'Cuz gay.
Max: "Yo, in da Jurassic World, da velociraptah with da star glasses!"
Half in the Bag, "A Conversation With Max Landis"

"He's not misunderstood. He's actually not a good person. He's dangerous and Obi-Wan and Luke have to be desperate to count on him for transportation. They're putting their own lives in the hands of someone who just shot someone.

Eventually, Han becomes one of the heroes. Before all that happens, though, he shoots first."

"Dracula does not tussle with the groundlings like a terrier at a bear-baiting!

Dracula does not do mandatory stealth sections!

Dracula does not fetch quest!

Dracula is the guy at the far end of an army of minions, slouched on a throne, tossing expensive wine glasses aside like he couldn't give two licks of a used tampon for whoever has to shampoo the carpet!"

"No longer unzipping that stupid brown leather jacket for fear of seeing his paunch—what 50s hood wore a brown leather jacket? (and let's all agree to not even discuss the flared "mom jeans")—the Fonz of this sixth season of Happy Days seems to grimace at the inevitable wild hoots and hollers from the audience whenever he makes an entrance. His character doesn't even make sense anymore. When he defeats his "allergy" to girls, he has them lined up like a lunch buffet for some smooching (there are frequent jokes that allude to Fonzie's sex life that would cow Caligula)...but before that, he told cheating Richie he hated cheaters (since when?)."

"Just like it would with the Borg, this show manages to emasculate Q to the point of being a non entity. I mean what is the excuse for him returning this time? He wants a baby with Janeway? I can imagine some clever dick sitting around in the ideas sessions throwing that one out and [Brannon] Braga getting a hard on at the idea!"
Joe Ford on Star Trek: Voyager, "The Q And the Grey"

"And this is where he starts to cry again. Tommy Fucking Dreamer, the 'hardcore' icon, cries more often than the fucking guy who says 'LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE'."

"Look Katara what happened to that fearless sugar queen I know? I know she's in there!"
Toph unintentionally lampshading Katara's Chickification, How I Became Yours

"You have seen the Iron Man armor hold its own against Thor, the God of Thunder. Now, after dozens of upgrades, it runs out of batteries, constantly malfunctions, falls apart, falls apart again, falls apart again, falls apart again, and takes its sweet time to assemble."

"Adam Taurus: The Black Trailer badass, Volume 2 cocktease, Volume 3 bad boy, Volume 4 nightmare to Volume 5 punching bag."
Murder of Birds regarding RWBY's Adam Taurus.


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