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Quotes / Aliens in Cardiff

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Joyce: Why Canada?
Head Alien: I figgered "Who'd fucking notice?" Goddamn was I right.

"This sort of thing just doesn't happen! Not in Cardiff!"
PC Andy, Torchwood, "End of Days"

Rhys: What, exactly, do I need protecting from?
Gwen: I catch aliens!
Rhys: Piss off! [...] Aliens. In Cardiff?!
Torchwood, "Meat"

I saw the fall of Troy. World War V. I pushed boxes at the Boston Tea Party. Now I'm going to die in a dungeon. [makes a face] In Cardiff.

The Doctor: Cardiff!
Martha: Cardiff?

Ryan: She thinks that thing is an alien.
Graham: Don't be daft. There's no such thing as aliens! Anyway, even if they was, they ain't gonna be on a train in Sheffield.
The Doctor: Why not? I'm alien, and I'm here.

"The Martians landed at around 4am in Bracknell, went 'Er...' and left again."
Hugh Dennis does "Unlikely lines from a disaster movie", Mock the Week

"Shortly thereafter the instructions came through - 'Get the fuck out of London, you dumb fucks. Get to Bruges.' I didn't even know where Bruges fucking was. (beat) It's in Belgium."
Ray, In Bruges

“In popular fiction when they’re choosing a place to destroy they’re looking for something iconic, or at the very least, a place that people recognize. That’s why you get New York destroyed all the time, or Washington, or monuments. It says something about Edmonton, that we’ve been chosen to be wrecked.”

Tom Servo: I thought giant monsters came from Japan, not Denmark!
Jonah: Well, Asia clearly has the most monster credibility, but there's a beautifully diverse array of global monsters all over the planet!

Kitten: So, not to disturb the discourse, but...You're at "war" with this "Anarchy Barony" over the district of North Norfolk?
Pyotr: On the small scale. That, and Great Yarmouth.
Kitten: Oh, I fucking hate Yarmouth.
Pyotr: Hah! I get it, it's pretty sad.