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Podcast / Jemjammer

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Clockwise from top: Cacophony, Jylliana, and Ælfgifu. Official art by Canary witch, with charcters designed by Rio.

Kit: Some of us are rusty, and some of us are brand new at Dungeons & Dragons.
Vicki: Some of us, yes. I'm the some of us.
Maq: Some of us dramatically describe our outfits for five minutes.

Jemjammer is an actual-play podcast set in the Spelljammer setting of Dungeons & Dragons. The game is DMed by Kit Walker, and the players are Mackenzie "Maq" Weaver, Annie Craton, and Kit's mom Vicki. The podcast launched in 2018 after three of the ladies put their Jem and the Holograms fancast The Jem Jam on hiatus due completing the animated series and comics.''

Our story begins after a strange and fantastic series of falling stars land in the wilderness surrounding the coastal city of Stormhaven. Three part-time adventurers—the boisterous elven bard Cacophony (Maq), the no-nonsense aasimar cleric Jylliana (Annie), and the stoic human ranger Ælfgifu (Vicki, pronounced "Alviva")—come across a disheveled woman trying to reach one of the landing sites. As they help her they discover the stars are actually ships that sail beyond the limits of their planet, and soon they are embroiled in a cosmic adventure.


You can follow them on twitter here and on tumblr here, and on youtube here.

This podcast contains the following tropes.

  • Absolute Cleavage: Cacophony is introduced wearing a tunic with a very deep v-cut.
  • Ac CENT Upon The Wrong Syl LA Ble: Cacophony pronounces Alana's name differently every time she says it. (Alana, Alana, Elana, etc).
  • Action Girl: All of the party, naturally.
  • Adventure Towns: Stormhaven is both a coastal shipping town and surrounded by dangerous swamps and forests, which has made it a natural hub for adventurers and bounty hunters.
  • Alien Lunch: Ælfgifu goes to a space station pub for lunch and orders the chowder. It looks at her funny.
  • Archer Archetype: Ælfgifu is more closed off than the other women in the party, and she's a ranger.
  • Armor Is Useless: In the "can't be stealthy" department. When Vicky asks why Annie keeps failing stealth rolls, she points out that Jylliana is wearing chain mail.
    Annie: I go cling clang cling clong!
    * Ask a Stupid Question...: When Jyllana asks how you can get tides in space.
    Grak: How do you get a big rock in space? It just is. LET'S GO!
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  • Badass Preacher: Jylliana is the group's cleric and operates out of a temple, but she's also the only party member wearing plate armour and wields massive hammer. She also has spells that can, and have, completely disintegrate opponents.
  • Beast Man: Mr. Herst is a Giff, or hippopotamus-man.
  • Brick Joke: In episode 8 Cacophony mentions having faced a giant sewer octopi in her past. She and Jylliana also get sidetraked by the word's grammar (Jylliana says "octopi" is plural, Cacophony tries to correct to "octopodes". In the next episode they encounter one tentacular, beaked creature.
    Jylliana: Oh my god! Sewer octopodes!
    Cacophony: I told you!
  • Blob Monster: The party encounter several oily slimes in the sewers of Port Meridian.
  • Boom, Headshot!: In "Starfall", Alana's gun disintegrates one of the the giant spiders in a single shot.
    Ælfgifu: Cacophony, next time we let her go first.
  • Celestial Body: The constellates are beings hundreds of miles wide and made of light that live in Wyldspace, and are seen as constellations from planets. Jylliana sees the Serpent Constellation from the deck of the Kestrel, and it looks back at her.
  • Concealed Customization: Jylliana states she's only going to wear the helmet she found at the end of episode 7 if she can toggle the display on and off.
  • Cool Helmet: Inverted. Jylliana loots the Space-Fun Helmet. While it does reveal invisible objects and give advantage on saving throws, it also makes her look like an asshole.
  • Cool Starship: The Kestrel, the ship that brought Alana and her crew to this planet.
  • Dark-Skinned Blond: Jylliana has dark skin but platinum blonde hair, which causes her to stand out despite her wanting to blend in.
  • Dem Bones: The Kestrel encounters a ship crewed by animated skeletons in episode 5, aptly titled "Ghost Ship".
  • Dreaming of Things to Come: Jylliana has begun having dreams of a shadow spreading across the sky prior to the story's beginning.
  • Drop the Hammer: Jylliana wields a large hammer in battle.
  • Establishing Character Moment: The fact that the first thing Maq mentions about Cacophony is her giant bosom is a clear indicator for both of them.
  • Full-Name Ultimatum: After Annie finds out that Kit wasn't keeping track of a real spellcaster in a group of illusory ones and just rolling a dice to see if the party hit the real one.
    Annie: Kittington Middlename Walker!
  • Gag Boobs: Maq is sure to mention Cacophony's giant bosom when first describing her.
  • Ghost Ship: Episode 5, "Ghost Ship", has one manned by animate skeletons.
  • Giant Squid: Maq had a run-in with a sewer octopus before joining the party. Later when the party encounters a grick (which is really more of a giant worm with tentacles), they consider it one.
  • Giant Spider: The first monsters the group encounter is a trio of giant spiders. This is just a taste of the neogi, giant alien spiders that can control minds and breed by having their young burst from their corpses. The party has to fight them after they attack Alana's ship.
  • Guest-Star Party Member: Grak the Dohwar (penguin-person) joins the group in "Port Meridian", played by Rio.
  • Hawaiian-Shirted Tourist: Grak is wearing one in their first appearance. It's their only article of clothing.
  • Heroic BSoD: Jylliana has one when she tries to pray at a shrine to Ethla and hears nothing. This is furthered by one of the groundskeepers nearby informing her that most gods can't hear their subjects in wildspace and vice versa, which shakes Jylliana to her core because she's always been able to feel her goddess.
  • I Am the Noun: When asked if she needs to buy healing potions, cleric Jylliana replies "I am the healing potion".
  • "Join the Army", They Said: While fighting the giant spiders in episode 1.
    Jylliana: Leave the convent, they said. Go to Stormhaven, they said. Travel the world, they said. Nobody ever said anything about the giant spiders. You can't convert the giant spiders! You just have to deal with them!
  • Jumped at the Call: Cacophony is eager to be hired by Alana to find the fallen stars.
  • Kaleidoscope Hair: Cacophony can change her eye colour at will, including giving herself heterochromia.
  • Kaleidoscope Hair: Cacophony's hair is usually blue, but changes colour often.
  • Lame Pun Reaction: After Cacophony uses one in the form of "Vicious Mockery" against some slimes ("Slime flies when you're in the sewers"), Vicki asks if there can be a penalty for bad puns. Annie points out that the puns have been getting better and worse simultaneously.
  • Large Ham: This is the only level on which Cacophony operates. Maq also falls into this while describing Cacophony's actions.
  • Leaning on the Fourth Wall: After an extended break between episode five and six, Jyllana jokes that the docking procedure they began in the previous episode felt like it took eight weeks to complete.
  • Lizard Folk: Finn the cook is a Kobold.
  • Loud of War: When ambushed by bandits, Jylliana uses the spell Thaumaturgy to increase her volume to "voice of god" levels, then shouts at the bandits until they flee in terror.
  • Magic Music: Cacophony can do this with her viol by nature of being a bard.
  • Motion Capture Mecha: Not a mech, but the Kestrel is piloted by a person plugging themselves into the ship's helm and maneuvering it with their arm gestures. It makes drinking a glass of water somewhat difficult.
  • My Nayme Is: Ælfgifu is pronounced "Alviva".
  • Names to Run Away from Really Fast: Navarres was investigating something called "the World Eater" and its associated cult, who are responsible for the attack on Stormhaven.
  • Never Live It Down: Cacophony almost died to a carpet.
  • Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot: Stormhaven is attacked by Draconians, which are undead dragonborn-like abominations.
  • No Indoor Voice: Cacophony shouts a lot, to the point where Kit has her re-do stealth rolls on occasion to see if anyone heard her exclamations.
  • Noodle Incident: Cacophony, Ælfgifu, and Jylliana have had a few adventures before the story proper starts, on account of the players having adventures with the characters as well. One such mission mentioned to Alana involved stopping a murderous scarecrow rampaging through town.
  • No-Sell: Mr. Hurst is stuck in a pool of acid, but resists it so much he only takes 1 damage each turn. It's basically vinegar to him.
  • Not Good with People: Ælfgifu was raised predominantly in the wilderness and isn't used to other people, preferring the company of animals. She's certainly tried to associate with others, but she still finds her companions quite bewildering.
  • Obvious Trap: The suits of armour in Spider Chateau. Jylliana predicts that they'll activate when the party passes their line of site. When Grak tosses a rock past them they attack, and Jylliana and Cacophony high-five.
  • Orphan's Ordeal: Ælfgifu's earliest memories are of a caravan she and her parents were on being attacked and her parents dying. After that she was raised by a kind man in the woods.
  • Overly Long Gag: When the group is ambushed and Cacophony has to rouse everyone from their sleep to fight back, Jylliana spends a good five minutes waking up and gathering up her stuff. It almost lasts into the fight itself!
  • Parental Substitute: Ælfgifu was raised by a man in the woods after her parents were killed in an ambush.
  • Perplexing Plurals: An odd inversion where Cacophony briefly uses "octopi" to refer to a singular sewer octopus.
  • Shout-Out:
    • When the party is ambushed whilst guarding the Kestrel, Cacophony bluffs that the group are searching for a white hart to become queens of the land.
    • While Jylliana is trying to wake up at this time, Ælfgifu calls out "Danger Will Robinson!"
    • While searching for a way out of the sewers in "The Catacombs" and Cacophony finds a secret door, Annie can be heard quietly chanting "secret door, secret door, secret door!".
  • Space Station: Port Meridian, which is built into an asteroid.
  • Space Whale: The Kestrel encounters a pod of these, called Kindori, in "Into the Void".
  • Survival Mantra: "Ethla knows that we are weak and yet she asks for strength" is Jylliana's, presumably a prayer to her Goddess Ethla. Later it's mentioned that she's expanded to muttering the entire holy text while inside the neogi ship.
  • Running Gag: A side-effect of Cacophony's Eladrin moods is that each session has her determine a personality trait and flaw. At the beginning of the story her trait is that she craves chocolates and fine wines, and her flaw is being so generous that she gives things away to the point that she runs out of supplies. Thus, many scenes involve Cacophony pouring wine into a goblet and handing it off to her friends and acquaintances for almost no reason at all.
  • Spy Catsuit: Cacophony has a red and black one for stealth missions. It pairs with black two-inch heels (as opposed to higher, glittery ones in her regular apparel).
  • Technologically Advanced Foe: Alana is this to the giant spiders from the first episode, since she has a gun that can disintegrate them. They're not sure how to react to that after it happens.
  • Transflormation: Mr. Herst is encased as wood seemingly as a precautionary measure after the Kestrel crashes.
  • Unflinching Walk: Cacophony does this as she sets the neogi ship to explode, though rather than a walk it's a slow-motion run. Again, while the others run at normal speed.
  • Verbal Tic: Cacophony calls others "my dear" and "my love" quite often. Jylliana doesn't like it.
  • Wall Master: The party encounter one in episode 7 in the form of a rug monster that tries to eat Cacophony.
  • Waxing Lyrical: When they land at Port Meridian and try to figure out what to do, Cacophony declares that the proper action is to find a girl named Brandy and tell her she might be a fine girl, but your life, your lover, your space sea.
  • Why Did It Have to Be Snakes?: Jylliana is afraid of spiders, which is a concern when the first encounter the group faces is a group of giant spiders. And gets even worse when she finds out the creatures that attacked Alana's ship are neogi, who are giant, mind-controlling spiders.
    • This is actually a fear shared with Jylliana's player Annie, though it's been confirmed that it's at a level she's okay with.
  • Wine Is Classy: Cacophony's mood in the first session drives her to crave classy wine, so she buys a bottle and four goblets for her and the party. And anyone else she can hand the wine off to.

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