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Podcast / If I Were You

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Amir:Welcome to If I Were You, the only advice podcast on the internet hosted by us. I'm Amir.
Jake: And I'm Jake.

If I Were You is an advice podcast hosted by Jake Hurwitz and Amir Blumenfeld (of Jake and Amir fame). The series began on May 13, 2013, and has since produced over 150 episodes. All of the episodes can be found here.

On the podcast, Jake and Amir read fan submitted emails about their listeners' daily life problems; "sticky situations," if you will; and they try to give the best advice they can (while taking plenty of time to make fun of the letter writer). Most of the questions they get involve love and dating, but they also tackle a range of other subjects, including family, friendship and work. Several celebrities have made guest appearances on the show, including Ben Schwartz (of Parks and Recreation fame), Allison Williams (star of HBO's Girls), former NBA legend Rick Fox, and rapper Hoodie Allen.

This podcast provides examples of:

  • Catchphrase: By now they have a dozen of them. “You do you,” “seize the cheese,” “todah” and “things got real,” just to name a few.
  • Couch Gag: Each episode begins with a new fan submitted theme song.
  • Crazy Jealous Guy: Episode 15 had one letter writer who was overly paranoid about his girlfriend cheating on him. Apparently, he wanted advice on how to "recognize cheaters" and "catch them in the act," adding that he wasn't sure he could trust anyone, especially not his girlfriend. This was Jake's response:
    Jake: Holy shit, dude. Never be in a relationship.
  • Demonic Possession: Episode 152 featured a letter from a girl who was convinced that her brother might have fallen victim to this (though she was "99%" sure that he was just messing with her).
  • Disappeared Dad: Episode 7 features a letter from a young teenage boy whose father was never around to teach him to shave.
  • Dogged Nice Guy: Several of their letters come from male fans talking about their unrequited crushes.
  • Double Standard: Abuse, Female on Male: Averted in Episode 24. One fan talked about a girl in his circle of friends who would constantly hit him with little provocation, and both Jake and Amir agreed that it wasn't okay and that he absolutely shouldn't have to take it.
  • Driven to Suicide: In the first episode, Jake and Amir envision a scenario that ends with the first letter writer killing himself at a Starbucks. This later became a running joke throughout the series.
  • Drives Like Crazy: Amir makes all of his passengers fear for their lives whenever he gets behind a wheel, as recounted by Jake in Episode 39. Guest star Streeter Seidell had this to say:
    Streeter: I've never seen anyone drive so much like a grandpa... while going so fast.
  • Evil Is Petty: This trope perfectly describes the evil alter ego Jake and Amir invented for their coworker, Jon Wolf. Frequently, they'll recount stories of Wolf going to extreme lengths to make the lives of others a little more inconvenient (in ways that are, technically, not illegal). Sometimes, for instance, he'll go down to the retirement home and tell all of the patrons that their grandchildren are there to see them, just to disappoint them when they come to the lobby and see nobody waiting for them.
  • Momma's Boy: Jake, to a tee. He'll constantly go on about how much he loves his mom, and he even had her on the show as a guest on episode 32. Also, whenever the podcast takes a turn for the raunchy, he'll personally tell his mom to turn the volume down for the next two minutes.
  • No Guy Wants an Amazon: Discussed in episode 147, which featured a tall girl who had trouble finding a man who was comfortable with being shorter than her.
  • No Social Skills: Jake and Amir’s impression of the second letter writer from Episode 40, who was asking for first date advice. The letter was so awkwardly worded that the two hosts speculated that the fan could be an alien, or a computer.
  • Platonic Declaration of Love: Jake tends to go overboard with this while Amir is more restrained.
  • Red Oni, Blue Oni: Jake and Amir, respectively. When giving advice, Jake tends to let his passions get the best of him, while Amir’s advice is usually calm, measured and logical.
  • Rhymes on a Dime: Both Jake and Amir love to do this whenever they can, but Amir in particular takes every opportunity he gets to show off his rhyming skills.