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Old Shame / Fan Works

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"Re-reading them now is not so much shameful as it makes me wonder if I was doing meth while I was 18 and didn't notice."
Breech Loader on Old Shames "The Chosen" and "Hyena Love".

The feeling is pretty much universal among fanfic writers who keep it up for any period of time. It's not unheard of for the latest update of a Long Runner to casually mention that the author now finds the opening chapters to be complete crap, and many a Dead Fic only remains dead because the author can't stand to read it from the beginning again. But here are some specific examples...


  • Linkara of That Guy with the Glasses and Atop the Fourth Wall had written "Web of Dimensions" A Self-Insert Fic crossing Pokémon/Digimon/Sailor Moon under the name PsyWeedle. It appears to have been taken down, as that one is not on his list of fanfics. Bennett the Sage, however, did manage to get his hands on it for Masterpiece Fanfic Theater. Linkara is there, tied up and trying to stop Sage.
  • Prolific Lion King fanfic author, ThatPersonYouMightKnow, first wrote a series based on Alpha and Omega. Out of shame for their poor quality, he deleted them forever.
  • The FanFiction Critic mans up and reviews her own Old Shame in a Very Special Episode. It's... actually not as terrible as she thought. Still pretty bad, but not terrible.
  • Notorious furry Sage Freehaven. As a teenager — and prior to entering the Furry Fandom — he wrote several awful Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers fanfics called "The Dark Savior Saga", which saw various revisions over his tenure in the fandom and contained innumerable examples of bad fanfic tropes; he also made the mistake of writing them under his real name, only later changing them to bear his Furry Fandom pen name. Years later, he had the entire series — and anything else associated with both that name and his real name, including a MiSTing of the first fanfic in the series — stricken from the Rescue Rangers fandom's fan works repository. The only place you can read any of it now is at Everything What Is Crap, where the MiSTing of the first story in the series (found under the "American Works" section) remains intact.
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  • GeminiStar01 has been hovering around Fan Fiction Dot Net for six years now, starting with the second season of Digimon and Yu Yu Hakusho fics. Don't bring them up when talking to her, unless it's in person and you want to see the funny color she turns.
  • Nimbus Llewelyn tends to regard most of his older works as this, particularly the Shadowsverse, regarding them with a fair degree of embarrassment, to the point not even bothering to defend it against those who actually critique them - and, being a troper, remark that he actually considered removing the pages, before deciding otherwise. All he does is point out that a) he started the first one when he was 14, b) said first one was his first long form fic, and the first one he actually completed, so it should be judged with that in mind.
  • Eyrie Productions Unlimited's first project was Undocumented Features, a work they are still continuing 20 years after it started. However, their second was the spinoff (Gryphon and Zoner get) Hopelessly Lost, something that the original authors would prefer to have you forget (and which they are, in fact, recreating as Bubblegum Crisis: The Iron Age, a markedly superior work). Also, within the Undocumented Features body of work, the authors aren't too fond of the initial stories, which had started as a silly blend of wish fulfillment and in-jokes; Gryphon has referred to them as his "crap period."
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  • Author razzamatazz73 actually changed her penname because she was so embarrassed by her old fanfics. She even mentions on her profile that her general rule of thumb is to ignore just about everything published before 2007. Her newer material is noticeably better, considering her rather cliched first fics and later Star Trek (2009) and FusionFall successes. Her review responses to her older stories are particularly amusing, as she usually begins all responses by apologizing to the reader.
  • The Both Syllables series ended unfinished (and was then erased from the Internet) for this reason. The author eventually released her list of reasons for hating the series.
  • Andrew Dickman created a short flash animation called Rockman Neo. He intended to create a Darker and Edgier fanfic and fan game based on the Mega Man series. However, after some time, Dickman abandoned the project. Not only that, but he started becoming outright hostile to fans who asked whatever happened to Rockman Neo.
  • Monica Gilbey-Bieber has a commentary of his old Troll Fic, One Less Lonely Gurl, here.
  • The first multi-chaptered installment of the For Good 'verse underwent a drastic rewrite as well as a change of titles, from Watermark to Breakaway. The author cites bad writing, among other things, and is embarrassed in general at the BLoSC fics she wrote when she first entered that particular fandom.
  • There was once a Sonic babyfic by Aerogreymon8.0, titled Eggman's New Invention, about Eggman inventing a weapon that turns male people into babies and the female characters having to take care of them. It got taken down somewhere between November 2005 and early in '06. When contacted (that is, while he even went by the aforementioned penname; unknown whether he changed his name or deactivated his account altogether since then) he stated that he was rather self-conscious about it.
  • My Inner Life is this for Link's Queen. She now derides it as something stupid she did when she was younger, and hates talking about it.
  • Cori Falls apparently laughs at her old stories now.
  • John Nowak, creator of The Nowakverse, began his MST of Under The Bridge (the first story in the series - which he wrote!) by describing himself as someone who should never have written Rescue Rangers fanfic. He would go on to insult the story in other MST works, as well.
  • Stephen Ratliff, creator of Marissa Picard, was mostly enthusiastic about his creation... except for one story involving her. One MST of the story "Time Speeder" opens with a quote, taken from a Star Trek discussion group, where Ratliff states he never should have written "Time Speeder".
  • Part of why Occam Razor (previously known as Cyber Commander) wrote a remake of Yu-Gi-Oh! The Thousand Year Door was to purge it of the character Wanda Underwood, whom he came to despise for being a needless Take That! at Weevil. There were other parts of the old version he hated, like having Raven use a Dark Scorpion Deck with three new members on the team (violating the Five-Man Band status of the group). He has also forbidden any other authors from using those cards.
  • Edrobot, of Jake English's Mysterious Theater of Scientific Romance from the Year 3000 once mocked the ridiculous crossover Hinata Ends With The Soul Calibur in an MST, only to reveal at the very end that he was the original author of the fic.
  • "Sonic The Hedgehog: The Series". The author has pulled it from all online sources and deleted personal backup copies. It no longer even exists and the author has stated regret for spending time on it.
  • This is how Blaze, the author of the infamous My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic fanfic The Conversion Bureau, sees his work. The idea behind the story was to explain his own personal hypothesis as to why Equestria has no humans (with a little bit of personal Wish Fulfillment tossed in), but his inexperience as a writer caused the story to be filled to the brim with all sorts of Unfortunate Implications he never meant to convey. As a result, he got a great deal of backlash and an accidental reputation as a Misanthrope Supreme, so much so, he dropped the story entirely and left it unfinished, declaring the premise was better in the hands of the Recursive Fanfiction authors. Later on, one of them, Chatoyance, with her more radical approach to the premise and penchant for causing Flame Wars, far overshadowed him, which allowed his side of the fic's meta backstory to become more noticed and the hate to ease up.
  • Avenging Hobbits, the author of the Harmony's Warriors series, decided that the original version of Iron Mare was of such poor quality that he declared it Canon Discontinuity (even using the term), removed it from FimFiction, and rewrote the whole thing.
  • Frollo Freak/CrazedWriter, creator of Back to the Frollo and The Disney Seven, very much hates her "Claude and Me" fanfics (based off the villian, Judge Claude Frollo from Disney's The Hunchback of Notre Dame, and admits they were awfully Mary-Sueish and poorly made:
    (On her old Frollo fics) "Warning! The early stuff – e.g., the "Claude & Me" series – is blatantly and awfully Mary Sue-ish. I hate it."
  • Despite gaining a fair amount of praise, Steve Worek, creator (and mostly unseen co-star) of The Rocky Horror Picture Show fan film "Bedroom Scenes" generally scorns any discussion of it. The theme song for the unmade sequel, sung to the tune of 'Science Fiction Double Feature,' would've urged viewers to forget that "Bedroom Scenes" existed.
    • Steve has since removed "Bedroom Scenes" from his own channel, and outside of a mention of it in another video, he no longer acknowledges it at all.
  • Frustratedstudent, the writer of the Les Misérables fanfiction "A Thenardier's Redemption" was mortified enough to do a rewrite of the entire thing, and pleads youthful innocence for some of the events there.
  • SiFi270 has disowned Snow Angels and deleted it from, and will mock it in his later fan fics every chance he gets. As far as he is concerned, the Recursive Fanfiction written by Racke is infinitely better.
  • Pretty Cure Perfume Preppy is one of the most famous and polarizing fan fics in the entire Pretty Cure fandom. It was so famous that it started a trend of people making their own fanseries. At first, its creator, Cure Shabon, was proud of it. But after many years, she now realizes how cheesy and flawed it really is, and doesn't consider it her best work anymore.
  • Despite receiving near-unanimous praise during its active phase, the "Metroid" / "The Legend of Zelda" crossover fanfic "Life of Samus" has become its author's standard for terrible writing. Every instance of it being mentioned now is in an overwhelmingly negative context.
  • When he was 19, Max Landis wrote a Super Mario fanscript. When he released it for download on his site, he added a few pages at the beginning emphasizing its problems and how much it sucks.
  • The author of Weiss Reacts once wrote an old Crossover fanfic about Weiss meeting various rich and fallen nobles from other media, before abandoning it due to its low quality of writing. He left it up for posterity, but doesn't respond to the rare request to continue the fic or any questions about it.
  • The author of Sonic X: Dark Chaos ended up hating the original version of the story so much (and listening to the criticism of several reviewers) that he decided to rewrite the entire thing from scratch, and refused to write the sequel until it's finished.
    • He also considers several of his previous now-deleted stories (including Fall of the Seedrians, a prequel to Dark Chaos) as this trope. He also admits that his crossover between Sonic the Hedgehog and Whose Line Is It Anyway? is pretty bad too, but he only keeps updating it because he has fun writing it.
  • The author of the LBT fanfic Out Of The Shadows 2 greatly dislikes the story. She had never intended on making a sequel and only done so for a friend. She regards the sequel as unnecessary and partially undermines the original story with the sudden revival of Rex. Her disapproval of the story was part of the reason it ended up being cancelled.
  • Jabberwocky1996 was so embarrassed by everything he wrote before The Thing Beneath The Sea that he deleted all of them. He's especially ashamed by his Harry Potter fanfics due to the poor writing quality, random Original Characters and due to his lack of knowledge of the franchise (not helped by the fact that he's a non-fan). Suffice it to say, none of his early fics exist anymore.
    • Subverted with The Adventures of Brianna Baggins, as he doesn't outright hate the fic and says it helped him flesh out his writing, but feels there were several missed opportunities, that he stuck too close to movies, and that much of the fic was loaded with Narm, hence the massive re-writes under the name A Hobbit's Tale.
  • The fanfiction website Archive of Our Own acknowledges this possibility, and allows any author to "orphan" some or all of their works, so that all information about authorship is permanently erased (alternately, the author's name is still mentioned, but the work itself isn't associated with the author in the database.) Useful if you're ashamed of a story, but for whatever reason don't want to delete it entirely.
  • Gregg Landsman sees the original version of Nobody Dies as this, especially in comparison to the Rebuild version, both due to the Retcons he made in regards to the comedic setting and the increasing amount of hate the story got as a result.
  • Sort of an In-Universe example (or rather, several), the Mary-Sue Hunter franchise Anti-Cliché and Mary-Sue Elimination Society features an organization with the belief that Sues are, by nature, abhorred by their own creators, and indeed, many of the Sues who are hunted are placed in the fic by request of authors who want to show that.
  • Mr. Fanfic Guy deleted Saki: After Story for this reason, calling it "the worst fanfic (he's) ever written."
  • Breech Loader, the author of such dark and dramatic fics as Prison Island Break and My Time Of Dying long ago wrote The Lion King fanfics "The Chosen" and "Hyena Love" under the name "Loa". They are considering putting them up, warts and all, on their FF account. While admitting they are deeply ashamed, they've also admitted that it's just part of learning to write.
    • They've also mentioned "Bloody Domination 2".
      Breech: "I don't actually regret writing it. There's quite a lot of it I'd still write today. But as they say, when it's good, it's very very good, but when it's bad... it's horrid."
  • This is common in the Loud House fandom.
    • Animationfan15 wrote "The Diary of A Loud", a story where Lincoln hospitalizes Lola over a show-and-tell. After Peeking Through The Fourth Wall did an episode on it, the fic was deleted.
    • Bobbybooboobear's infamous "The Boy Who Cried Idiot" is another such example.
  • Chapter 9 of the Azumanga Daioh fic Control was rewritten because the writer thought the original was embarrassingly bad.
  • Downplayed with the Metroid Dark Fic Rise from Darkness. It was written when the author was only fourteen. It shows in how bloody and dark it is. The writer notes that the fic is a bit embarrassing and is a product of its time, but they can't hate it.
  • The writer of Mary Phillips Story discontinued the story due to discontent with it.
  • The writer of the Korra/Asami fic Unstable Equilibrium deleted the story because the writer dislikes both Korrasami and The Legend of Korra as a whole.


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