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Neutral Wiki / Janet

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[Unstimulating "ding" as Neutral Janet teleports in.]

You've arrived at the Accounting Office. All point calculations taken on Earth are made here. End of conversation.

All in-put of questions and requests are to be made verbally and neutrally. Sign your name and question below and they both will be processed. All cursing will be censored. End of conversation.

What would you like to ask her?

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  • What is the meaning of life?
    • Life is the condition that distinguishes animals and plants from inorganic matter, including the capacity for growth, reproduction, functional activity, and continual change preceding death. End of conversation.
  • How do you feel about sky-diving?
    • I do not. End of conversation.
  • How was your day?
    • It is going neutrally. End of conversation.
  • Hey Janet, have sex with me.
    • Sexual reproduction is not my department. End of conversation.

  • Can you help me find Derek and Disco Janet so I can ask them stuff?
    • All Dereks are logged in the Book of Dereks. All Disco Janets are in the Janet Warehouse waiting for processing. End of conversation.

  • What is the personality of Ned Flanders from The Simpsons?
    • That is not my department. End of conversation.
  • What is pi times 24 billion squared?
    • 1.80956 times 10 to 21. End of conversation.
  • Which place did Albert Einstein go to?
    • Albert Einstein has been filed into the Bad Place for Eternal Damnation. End of Conversation.
  • An-cay ou-yay ead-ray is-thay?
    • All spelling errors have been cited and will be autocorrected. End of conversation.
  • Can you get drunk?
    • All inebriation will be brought to Accountant Lisa for processing. End of conversation.
  • What do you call a dog with no ears? Anything you want, he can't hear you!
    • All amusement has been put into the schedule. End of conversation.
  • Can you roll your tongue?
    • That is not my department. End of conversation.


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