Music / Songs to Wear Pants To

Contrary to popular belief, you do not require pants to listen.

Songs To Wear Pants To is a website. It has some songs, and you can listen to them in your computer. All you have to do is right-click and 'save as', or so its two Theme songs say.

Basically, on April 9th, 2004, a guy named Andrew Huang living in Toronto created a website where people could request songs about any subject. Initially, the rule was that all songs would be under 1 minute and 11 seconds, but that rule has since been done away with.

Since STWPT's opening, hundreds of songs have been requested about pretty much any subject, from Sea Anemones and instructions on how to put on pants to evil pickles killing everybody and robot pirates.

These Songs To Wear Pants To songs are just about any genre you can think of, from hard rock, to techno, to a game soundtrack/children's music/psychedelic rock mixture.There have been six CD's released from the songs created throughout the years, titled (in chronological order) Green Pants, Blue Pants, Pink Pants, Sweat Pants, Skinny Jeans, and the final release, Corduroys, With the Tassels. Each CD cost $10.

Roughly a little less than half of the songs on Songs To Wear Pants To were free to download, with just right clicking and saving as (as the first sentence states). Other songs were 99 cents to download.

Song requests were done by email; free requests were usually done only if Andrew sufficiently liked the concept and if he had free time, while paid requests (costing anywhere from $50-$200 a minute) would always be done on time for obvious reasons. Many paid requests were not posted on the website, being that a lot of them are personal and all, but a fair few were, and some even made it onto the albums.

Unfortunately, Time Marches On and the website is now defunct. The old website layout can be viewed through the Internet Archive's WaybackMachine. However, as Adobe Flash is no longer supported, none of the music can be accessed via the archived website.

All is not lost, however— The music lives on through Bandcamp, Spotify, as well as Andrew Huang's other projects. Some songs are available through YouTube via dedicated fans.

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This website provides examples of:

• Age-Progression Song: It Was The World.
• Ambiguously Gay: In What I Would Do If I Were Suddenly Teleported To Your House Right Now the kid in South Dakota calls Andrew dreamy, gets quite excited at the idea of giving Patrick Stewart a 90 minute calf massage, and sews the doilies in his house himself.
• Big "NO!": At the end of What I Would Do If I Were Suddenly Teleported To Your House Right Now, when Andrew learns that he has teleported to South Dakota.
• Break-Up Song: Never being a fan favorite- one fan even paid for it to be extended. On the less serious side, this also counts as one.
• Boastful Rap: One of the bonus CD songs, Vanessa is partly this when the narrator claims to be the "sickest MC you're ever gonna hear", but is also a bit of Nightmare Fuel when the narrator reveals that he has killed Vanessa and is eating her liver off of her naked body.
  • Fridge Brilliance: Now think about the different meanings of the word "sick".
• Bread, Eggs, Milk, Squick: It's Halloween! lists a few costumes. In the middle of this very long list is a human centipede.
• Call a Rabbit a "Smeerp": The titular desambongulizer of How to Upgrade the Components on Your Mogrificating Desambongulizer, a Step By Step Guide is assumed to be a hamburger.
• Call-Back: From It's Halloween!", a callback to his Crunk Juice music video.
  I'm two doors ahead of you (better catch up)
  to my crunk juice gorilla mask (get messed up)
• Captain Obvious: His superpower is that he states the obvious!
• Careful with That Axe / Metal Scream:
  • Lyrics To A Song.
  • Voweltacular is practically nothing but screaming.
• Censored for Comedy: Done in Little Eeeeee Foo Foo, even though it's not actually bleeping any swears.
• Cheek Copy: We Photocopy Our Body Parts is about this.
• Christmas Songs: With all the songs, there had to be one eventually. However, it's not a Christmas song in the traditional sense...
  • A straighter example would be his genre-switch cover of a classic Christmas song.
• Comically Missing the Point: The beginning of this song:
  Random Guy: Um, I believe that she’s actually saying that she wants you to have her babies
  Andrew: Oh, yeah. That’s exactly what we’re talking about. Um, she offered her babies to me. I don’t know how to get them... maybe she’ll put them in the mail, er-
  Random Guy: Nonono, like have ...her babies.
  Andrew: Oh! ...Oh. Well, in that case, I have prepared a rap song for just such an occasion.
• Common Time: Parodied/criticized in It's Too Loud.
  • Quite a few songs are in unique time signatures, including the previously-mentioned Never, which is played in 5/4.
• Constrained Writing: "Not Using It", a rap without the letter "e".
• Cover Version: Andrew has covered several songs, including Still Alive, Pants on the Ground, and Fat Lip.
  • Also, a parody of Justin Bieber's "Baby" and a cover of the song from those Mentos commercials.
• Dance Sensation: Parodied in Old Fashioned Line Dance (Or Square), and played (somewhat) straight with Polka Loca.
• Drugs Are Bad: This song.
• Drunken Song: Andrew Vs. The Wilderness.
• Everything Is an Instrument: Some strange instruments have been used, such as spoons, the sound of flushing toilets, and fruit hitting the ground.
  • PANTS SOLO!
  • music made from 1000 pairs of pants
    • And to add to that, the sound of cheeks being flicked
    • Andrew simply coughing. Yeah, he is that awesome.
    • Car Noise Waltz of the Egg Slicer features, yes, car noises and an egg slicer. And it would probably be awesome in a car commercial.
  • Though it features regular instruments too, "Magical Cat" is based around samples of his cats.
  • The instrumental of "99 Red Balloons" covered with... red balloons.
• Everything's Deader with Zombies: Shoot The Zombies
• Everything Sounds Sexier in French: Crepes Et Baguettes is all in French and is really composed of Word Salad Lyrics, but that doesn't stop it from sounding like it's about something cool and/or sexy.
• Exact Words: The fan-favorite I Empty My Baby.
  • When someone complimented Andrew's rapping ability, then requested that he cover one of his favorite rap songs, they probably wanted a straightforward cover that would include actual rapping... But they didn't come right out and say that, so what they got was "Intergalactic" by The Beastie Boys as turned into a slow piano ballad.
• Fiery Redhead: The subject of The Zesty Redhead, obviously.
• Gratuitous German: Vorsprung Durch Technik; the only 3 lines of the song being random German phrases.
• Heavy Meta: It's Too Loud is in a hard rock style, criticizing hard rock.
• "I Am" Song: There's a lot of these.
• If My Calculations Are Correct: A nerd in The Right Amount of Cheese knows several of the Right Amounts.
  "So, according to my calculations, any of the following amounts of cheese would be suitable for putting into a hot dog bun before throwing it at your ex..."

• In a World…: Yakety Sax The Movie The Trailer opens with this line.
• Incredibly Lame Pun: Coffin, in which Andrew is coughin'.
• Innocent Innuendo: The Struggle To Become a Baseball Player starts out sounding rather...suggestive, but then reveals that it was really all just part of the struggle to become a baseball player.
• In the Style of: Parodied in I Am Trent Reznor and I Am Bjork.
• Interspecies Romance: Cephalopod Love Song
• Literal-Minded: Andrew is this when he's given enough room to get away with it, and sometimes he focuses on a hole in a concept, meaning the song itself is something completely unexpected - at least to the requester - such as "This Girl."
• Looped Lyrics: Used in Celtic Techno Burrito where the only words are "intimidated by the size of my burrito".
  • Also used in I Am Slightly Awesome.
• Lyrical Dissonance: Department Store vs. Predator
• Mood Whiplash: Listening through the archives can cause this. You can go from hearing a rap about cheese and crackers to a serious song about unrequited love right afterwards.
• Motor Mouth: YMCA
  • Also, twice in Crunk Juice.
• Mouthful of Pi: I Am The First Fifty Digits Of Pi
• Mister Seahorse: Mr. Andrew himself in autobiographical "I Am Having Your Babies".
• Mundane Made Awesome: The History Of STWPT.com
  "It was only a matter of minutes before this website became the top hit at Google. Yes, the top hit!
  No matter what you searched for, STWPT.com at number one! Unbelievable, literally, unbelievable!"
• Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot: We Are The Robot Pirates. "Robots are good and pirates are good/We do all the things that a robot should"
  • Due to popular demand, he eventually followed that up with "Zombie Ninjas"
• Political Overcorrectness: Parodied with "Politically Correct Holiday Song".
• Reading the Stage Directions Out Loud: Requests are often taken too literally for humorous purposes. For example, The Head of a Radio. It's also fairly common for Andrew to pronounce spelling errors made in the requests.
• Rhyming with Itself: In Crunk Juice, Andrew rhymes "messed up" with "messed up", twice in a row.
• Running Gag: "NO! You're wrong. You like to sing songs about tobogganing!" This also appears in the comments every now and then.
• Self-Deprecation:
  • Andrew weakly attempts this in Badgers, when asked to do a Self-Parody where he makes fun of himself.
  "Um, yeah, hey Andrew, you're a, you're a big loser! Four eyes... uhm... you suck! And... an-... I... you... uh, pooface..."
  • The whole point of A Jingle to a Product That Should Never Have Been Invented.
  "Have you ever wanted a song, but can't make one? Well now, someone with slightly more talent can do it for you! SONGS TO WEAR PANTS TO DOT - COM!"
• Serious Business: "I wanna clear this up: It's called Te-Neen-Oh, or Te-Nin-Oh. If you pronounce it any other way...I will cut you...". Part of the joke is that the submitter made serious business of the fact that the town name is pronounced "Ten-Nine-Oh", and cited "te-neen-oh" and "te-nin-oh" as examples of how not to pronounce it.
• Shaped Like Itself: Being about making cupcakes while playing the bongos, a song called "Bongos Look Like Cupcakes" is about playing the bongos while making cupcakes.
• Silly Love Songs: A lot of the paid songs are these.
• Single Stanza Song: There's a lot of these, such as A Bug Fell In Love With a Cat.
• Snark Knight: Andrew will come off as a bit of a Literal Genie when doing requests. If you ask for a song about how everything is "totally photoshoped" then you get a song that's about everything being totally photoshowp'd.
• Speedy Techno Remake: I Remix You From the Bottem Heart is one of an earlier song, I Promise You From the Bottem Heart.
• Stop and Go: One of the many things made fun of in It's Too Loud.
• Suddenly Shouting: The main twist of Lyrics to a Song is that he screams out every word that the submitter wanted to be "stressed out a little more."
• Theme Tune Roll Call: Steampunks and Super Bettas.
• This Is Your Song: Many fans have feeling that the outcome for the requester of This Girl was great and that it kicked off a beautiful relationship.
• Translated Cover Version: Blue
• Uncommon Time: Radio-friendly pop song "Alone" comes in 5/4 time. The uncommon time signature was the challenge.
• Villain Song: Theme for Evil Plan, here.
• Voice Clip Song
  • "Bubble Bath" takes a clip from a Will.i.am interview and turns it into the hook for a rap song about bathing.
  • How About It does this with his own previous songs, appending "Because of that crunk juice!" to random statements.
• Word Salad Lyrics: Many, but especially "I Empty My Baby": The request mentioned that Andrew could rearrange the order of the lyrics if he wanted, so he took that idea much further than the submitter probably had in mind.

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