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Vampire Bites Suck

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"Not quite the two discreet puncture marks of legend, are they?"
Wilhelmina Murray, speaking of her scars received from her encounter with a certain foreigner

Vampires need blood to survive. Some can survive on the blood of lesser creatures — rats, cats, dogs, etc. But their beverage of preference and choice is almost always human blood.

Humans who have encountered a Friendly Neighborhood Vampire may count themselves lucky, as the Kiss of the Vampire is at worst, a tolerable experience, and at best, as good as or Better than Sex.

The vampires who aren't quite so humane or human-friendly don't much care for whether their prey enjoys it. They likely won't survive the experience to care, as these vampires don't bother with table manners, let alone leaving two dainty, easily covered puncture wounds. They go for the jugular, and if the rest of the neck goes with it, c'est la mort.

The Gory Discretion Shot is seldom used with a violently hungry vampire, so the viewer is treated to seeing the High-Pressure Blood fountaining everywhere, and the police or intrepid meddling kids are treated to the messy aftermath. Where this can get really torturous is if the vampire is into Hemo Eroticism, because then they'll draw out the feeding process.

See Our Vampires Are Different, Vampire Hickey (which is the less messy version of this trope, where the bites are survivable and allow the vampirism to manifest), and Kiss of the Vampire for the flipside of this trope.


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    Anime & Manga 
  • Gantz has this trope in spades, to the point where we see a metal tub being filled with blood after a vampire cut a few women's heads off. They don't care how they get the blood - they just want it.
  • Alucard of Hellsing tends to not bother with subtlety ever. Unless maybe it'll make the Mind Screw even worse. He's been told that "It's not good to play with your food," but evidently it didn't take (also, he ate the person who said that). He won't sink two delicate fangs into your neck; he'll open his huge toothy maw, latch onto your throat, lifting you off the ground, savage flesh and sinew like a dog, and devour your broken body. Probably after he's done crushing you in battle, and almost definitely while laughing. He can also absorb blood that's anywhere nearby — in the manga, he calls rivers of spilt blood to him through the streets of a war-scarred London; and in the anime, he revives himself using the blood spilt in the tower of London. Feeding or not, he'll make a mess of you because it's fun. He's definitely not alone in this; vampires bite with mouths crammed full of fangs (even if they're Seras) and habitually tear out people's throats. All of them are brutal; Alucard is simply exceptionally brutal.
  • JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is horrific when it comes to this; its vampires feed by sinking their hands into human flesh, grasping a handy vein or artery, and absorbing the blood. It's possible for them to do this without leaving a scratch on you, but don't count on it. In Phantom Blood, one feeds using his hair — it comes across like the vines from The Ruins. The Pillar Men from Battle Tendency are even worse.
  • Played for laughs in Negima! Magister Negi Magi. Negi pays Evangeline for his lessons by allowing her to drink his blood. She insists on it, and he responds with the same reluctance and squirming as a kid getting a vaccination shot at the hospital.
  • Vampire Knight skirts the line between this and Kiss of the Vampire, especially with Yuuki and Zero. Almost all cases of vampire bites in the show lean toward this trope, though.
  • Happened once to the titular Dark Magical Girl in the Vampire Princess Miyu OAV. The first human she bit after her powers came to the surface, one of her classmates at school, died. In a subversion, Miyu didn't brutalize the poor girl, only biting her and sucking off almost all of her blood off-screen (we only see her passed out on the ground), and we learn about her also off-screen death a bit later. Not to mention it's a sort-of Justified Trope: it was the second time ever Miyu had drank someone's blood (the first one was when she met Larva) and had no real idea of how to do it; she told Larva in tears that one moment she was distracted and thinking the girl was kinda cute, and at the other she found herself sucking her blood off...

    Comic Books 
  • The first installment of the Batman vs Dracula series, Red Rain has Dracula and his minions slashing the throats of their victims with their fangs after they're done to cover up the supernatural element of their attack and disguise the killing as a standard murder.
  • Vampire attacks in Crimson are anything but pretty, usually involving maiming and tearing the victims apart with claws and fangs. Even the nicest vampires like Joe are prone to feeding this way.
  • The vampires in the guro comic Elizabeth Bathory by "Raulo" are extremely violent, often partly eating their victims after drinking the blood or even mutilating each other just for fun and letting their Healing Factor take care of the aftermath.
  • Mina Murray from The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen wears a red scarf to hide the scars from her attack by Dracula. Alan Moore decided that vampires would feed like vampire bats; i.e. grind the skin into hamburger with nasty serrated teeth, and lap up what comes out. So, Mina's scars are not the "pair of discreet puncture wounds" of legend, but massive and disfiguring (Alan Quartermain can't stop staring- because, as Mina finally allows him to explain, one of the women he'd loved and married also had scars on her neck, and he thought it was a sign). The film goes with the traditional bite look, the way the book had it.
  • Vampires in Preacher rip out the side of their victim's neck. The perils of not having fangs...
  • The traditional bitemarks are lampshaded in Joann Sfar's Vampire Loves: protagonist Ferdinand bites his sleeping victims with one fang so that they think it's a mosquito bite.
  • Played for dark laughs in a Jhonen Vasquez story: A young Vampire Vannabe, Eric, desperately wants to be a vampire for real and gets his wish— only to end up with a bad case of Looks Like Orlok, with an enormous bald head and fangs that resemble walrus tusks. He feeds by plunging one of these tusks straight into the top of the skull of his victim, not unlike puncturing a juice can with an old-style can opener. It probably kills the victim outright and horrifies Eric too, especially since he was imagining something more pleasant (oddly enough, the off-panel bite that turns him seems to be a classic Kiss of the Vampire).

    Fan Works 
  • Friendship Is Monsters: And how! Twilight even lampshaded it was nothing like in the movies. No two little pinpricks on her neck but shoulder being ripped with sharp teeth until teeth reached the bone, messily slurping the blood while tongue leaped at the blood like a dog. Painful and messy, it would have killed Twilight if not for Sunset's healing saliva.
  • In Revenge of the Energy Vampire, being attacked and drained by Nos-4-A2 is depicted as being very unpleasant and painful. He even uses it as a method of torture.

    Film — Live-Action 
  • In 30 Days of Night, the vampires are violent predators. And they don't even bother to wipe their mouths after feeding. Possibly justified, as their pillaging of the town was their equivalent of an all-you-can-eat buffet. The comic book has the vampires being similarly gory... but in private.
  • Bit: Having fangs sink into your neck and then get blood sucked out is, realistically, painful to the victim. It makes them usually pass out from blood loss.
  • The vampires in the Blade Trilogy movies are all savage and vicious, and usually rip their victims' throats open.
  • The female vampires in Count Yorga are like this, biting their victims anywhere to drain their blood, leaving bite marks all over the body. Oddly though the title character, Yorga, when feeding on his female victims is nowhere near as messy, just leaving pinpricks on their necks.
  • The vampires in Daybreakers are particularly violent, especially when starved. At one point a swarm of them rip a man's head off just to spill more claret.
  • In Dracula Untold, they're presented as extremely gruesome, with the vampire in question having their own faces drained of blood during and immediately after the feeding.
  • In Embrace of the Vampire (2013), vampire bites are ugly: tearing out a chunk of flesh and spilling litres of blood over the victim. No one is shown to survive one.
  • While most of the vampire attacks in The Fearless Vampire Killers are on the jugular, the innkeeper Shagal after trying to save his daughter from Count von Krolock, is found with vampire bites all over his body, and hardly any blood left.
  • From Dusk Till Dawn is full of vampires who bite hard and messy.
  • House of Dark Shadows (1970), the first movie spin-off of Dark Shadows, has vampire bites that show a full set of bloody teeth marks, not just two discreet punctures. Makeup artist Dick Smith created the prostheses by biting into a piece of raw steak, then enlarging and deepening the holes made by his canine teeth before making the casting.
  • I Am Legend has creatures purported to be violent and messy, but we never really get a good look at their feeding habits.
  • In Innocent Blood, the vampire rips the victim's throat out like an animal, which is kind of a subversion because otherwise she's a cute, sexy Friendly Neighborhood Vampire.
  • John Carpenter's Vampires features vampires who don't suck blood so much as tear a hole in your carotid and lap at the fountain.
  • Kiss of the Damned: Those which Maia delivers are very painful at least. In one case, she actually rips a chunk of flesh from a man's neck.
  • In Let the Right One In Eli has to snap the necks of her victims, drop them out of windows or otherwise end their suffering. Up until then they're still struggling around and twitching in agony. The process is so distressing to all concerned that she prefers to have her "Dad" drain her victims for her. Indeed, the one victim that is bitten but not killed, ends up starting to turn into a vampire themself before they decide to commit Suicide by Sunlight (which drives their friend to seek vengeance against the little monster that attacked them).
  • In Life Blood, vampire feeding consists of literally biting a chunk out of the victim's neck and then sucking the blood out of the wound.
  • In The Lost Boys, David's crew descends on Make-Out Point to tear the roofs off of cars and tear open the skulls of their victims.
  • Played with in George Romero's Martin (1977), where the "vampire" is a demented young man. He doesn't bite his victims — just slashes their arms open with razor blades.
  • In Near Dark the vampires, like Cassidy in Preacher, usually tear the neck open - Severen is shown to be the vampire equivalent of a messy eater - but it's not the only way to feed. Diamondback also cuts a woman's throat and drains the blood into a beer glass, proving that the vampires aren't fussy about how they get blood, as long as they get it.
  • The Night Flier: Discussed Trope by Richard Dees. The vampire doesn't leave tiny bite marks but punctures the necks of his victims with his giant fangs. If he even leaves them in one piece, that is.
  • In Nosferatu, Orlok's bite isn't too bad (twin puncture wounds), but Orlok's bites also spread the plague.
  • The 2008 Lucy Liu vehicle Rise: Blood Hunter features vampires who don't have fangs, so they wear tiny blades around their necks just to tear huge gushing holes in the necks of their victims.
  • The Film of the Book for 'Salem's Lot had messy, unpleasant vampires.
  • Theresa & Allison: Theresa reacts realistically to being bitten by a vampire, crying in distress and trying to get away but stops weakly because of her blood loss. Most other people bitten have the same reaction too.
  • The segment "Midnight Mess" from the 1973 Vault of Horror. What sucks more than a vampire bite? Being hung by your ankles and having a beer tap jammed into your jugular!
  • In the Dracula-display segment of Waxwork, the vampires not only drink the fiance's blood, they butcher his leg while he's still alive, then share the raw meat with his bride as "steak tartare".

  • The Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter series mostly employs the Kiss of the Vampire, but not all vampires bother; the title character has some nasty scar tissue where a vampire gnawed on her.
  • The Dresden Files is all over the place on this one. The White Court doesn't leave any marks on their prey but feed on the lifeforce of their prey by inducing a specific emotion. The Red Court use elaborate disguises to get close to their prey, then use their narcotic saliva to render the prey insensible while they go at it like vampire bats. The Black Court sucks in the conventional sense (Dracula was actually written as a guide to dealing with the Black Court), but resemble rotting corpses, so how they come by their prey is another question entirely. The Jade Court has been alluded to, but haven't appeared yet; the character that mentions them says they're from Asia but otherwise very secretive, and it's probably a safe bet that the Chinese "hopping ghost" is at least marginally related.
  • Vampires in Kim Harrison's The Hollows series leave scars on the necks of their victims. The bites may scar but the bite itself is euphoric due to highly addictive vampire venom that causes pleasure center reaction, so the victim craves being bitten again, even months after the bite. Worse, other vampires can re-trigger the bite scar. See Kiss of the Vampire.
  • The Laundry Files (by Charles Stross): In The Rhesus Chart, vampires are created via a form of Demonic Possession whereby an extra-dimensional parasitic intelligence possesses a subject, usually a ritual magician, granting powers in exchange for victims. Feeding on blood creates a link between the vampire's parasite and the victim, and the victim dies of something resembling mad cow disease within weeks, courtesy of the parasite snacking on their brain. If they don't feed the parasite, the parasite consumes the vampire.
  • Vampires in the Laura Caxton series have a mouthful of shark-like teeth sharp enough to bite through Kevlar like it was butter. They use them for that, too.
  • Poppy Z. Brite's vampires in Lost Souls (1992) will also rip and tear a victim to shreds, and then devour them, marrow and all. Yummy.
  • In Brian Lumley's Necroscope series, the vampires are all savage and vicious, even to each other. More to the point, due to the fact that they can reshape their bodies, their feeding habits range from using oversized jaws to tear open human torsos, to forming tentacular siphons and draining their victims dry.
  • In the Night World series, when vampires suck blood out of an unwilling and non-tranced victim, it is described as painful. One character compares it to your soul being sucked out of you. Willing, now...
  • In the third book of the President's Vampire series, when Nathaniel Cade, desperately needing blood to save himself, attacks an Intrepid Reporter trying to dig up dirt on President Curtis, the description makes a vampire bite seem more like an attack by a big cat than a traditional depiction.
    ''That was the last thing she thought before Cade ripped out her throat. The writers who described a vampire's bite as two neat puncture wounds in the neck were either being polite or or had never really looked their own teeth. A vampire, when he bites, hyperextends his canines, the third tooth on each side from the centre. They are necessary for any carnivore, designed by evolution for the express purpose of rending flesh. Canines are used for only one thing, even by humans. Canines tear. Megan Roark's head was attached to her body only by her broken neck and some gristle.
  • Vadim Panov's Secret City:
    • Masan, Secret City's blood-drinking inhabitants and the source of vampire myths, drink blood to live and to fuel their magic, which also renders them independent from the setting's regular magic power sources. The bite isn't poisonous and doesn't carry The Virus, but is unpleasant and messy.
    • Anna, the morph mage instinctively counters a Masan's psychic attack by growing hollow thorns on her body, then embracing and draining the Masan.
  • Nancy A. Collins' Sonja Blue series is full of vampires who are uncaring of the state in which they leave their victims.
  • Feeding vampires in The Twilight Saga rip their victims to bloody shreds first. Plus the excruciating pain if they don't kill you as the venom spreads.
  • Depending on the vampire in Anne Rice's The Vampire Chronicles, it can be either this or Kiss of the Vampire. Lestat tends to go for the latter, even though most of his victims are criminals. The novel Queen of the Damned has several vampires engage in a feeding frenzy in a mountain temple, where a group of mortals are so enthralled that they want their throats to be torn out. When a man offers himself to her, Pandora, who was originally disgusted with this, rips his head off in order to quickly suck in all the blood.

    Live-Action TV 
  • Buffy the Vampire Slayer has this, sort of. The vampire only needs to make you bleed to feed, so it's not as messy as most examples, however they don't leave the two neat puncture wounds common to Kiss of the Vampire. They leave behind an oval scar, as they bite with all their teeth. Note that this is all they have to do to feed. Most vampires are sadistic bastards and do much worse. Offscreen, but still.
  • In a Doing In the Wizard variant, the villain of an early CSI episode was a porphyriac convinced she needed to consume human hemoglobin to suppress her illness. Being fangless, she trained her guard dog to maul her intended prey, then removed their livers and spleens (rich in blood) and left each body looking like an animal-attack victim.
  • Deadliest Warrior used a freakin' alligator as the basis for a vampire's bite in "Vampires vs. Zombies". When the resulting pressure reading was placed into a pneumatic jaw, the "vampire fangs" bit through a "zombie skull", and reached the center of the brain. By comparison, very few non-gunpowder weapons tested on the show have been able to penetrate that deeply into the skull. The bite ultimately counted for less than 5 percent of the vampire's kills; based on the data, the vampires simply chose to strike the zombies down instead of biting them.
  • A Discovery of Witches: There is nothing romantic about being bitten by a vampire here. It's shown as causing realistic pain and leaves a victim greatly weakened assuming they survive at all.
  • Interview with the Vampire (2022): Vampires biting humans they don't care about is quite painful, to judge by their victims' screams.
  • The vampiric Lotte Lipp on The League of Gentlemen leaves huge, gruesome puncture marks.
  • In the Masters of Horror special "The V Word", the head vampire has no fangs to bite a victim's throat... so he tears out a hunk of flesh and laps up the blood. In another scene, a vampire slashes a man's throat with a piece of glass so his hungry friend can feed.
  • The vampires in Supernatural rip their victims' throats out while feeding, and are almost always reported as animal attacks. In "Monster Movie", Sam and Dean are confused when a vampire bite leaves neat twin puncture marks. It turns out the Monster of the Week is a shapeshifter impersonating a Classical Movie Vampire because he's a Dracula fan.
  • In The Vampire Diaries a full set of tooth marks is left on the victim, and when people are bitten there's the occasional sound like flesh being chewed. Though they can use their compulsion to make people ignore the pain, or at least forget about it afterward.
  • The X-Files: The episode "Bad Blood" features a Vampire Vannabe who wears fake fangs to bite people. At one point, he attacks a coroner without them:
    Skinner: The coroner's throat's been bitten.
    Mulder: The coroner's dead?
    Skinner: No, his throat was bitten. Sort of... gnawed on.

    Tabletop Games 
  • Dungeons & Dragons vampires don't generally feed like this — why let good blood spill all over? — but Van Richten's Guide to Vampires briefly mentions how long a vampire can offset starvation by tearing up a fresh corpse to get at its blood. Just in case it overestimates the PCs' hardiness and scores a TPK, leaving nobody who's still breathing left for dinner.
  • Vampires in the GURPS: Black Ops setting are fairly simple. In daytime, they sleep. At night, they hunt until they find a normal human, then tear it in half to eat the internal organs and slurp up the blood. Then they start hunting again, until sunrise. Then they sleep.
  • The Monster Manuscript was a booklet giving D&D stats and painting instructions from some Grenadier miniatures from the early '80s. One of the listed monsters is a "velanmorg", an elven vampire that messily plays out this trope, ripping victims' throats out and greedily guzzling the fountaining blood. Their claws hold the struggling prey securely as it bleeds out.
  • Rifts Vampires have a "Killing Bite" that's powerful enough to penetrate armor. Wild Vampires don't bite any other way.
  • In Vampire: The Masquerade, most vampires bring intense pleasure to those they feed on; this is referred to as "The Kiss". There are exceptions, however:
    • The Giovanni clan, on the other hand, have a bite that not only does more damage than your regular bite, it really freaking hurts. Fortunately, the Giovanni are a well-connected clan of few moral compunctions, so there's always a steady stream of not-quite-willing food... Or corpses, who are in no position to feel anything. Given that the clan is renowned for their necromantic abilities and zombies have no need of blood anyway, the latter is basically killing two birds with one stone for them.
    • A vampire with the four-point Flaw of 'Grip of the Damned' gives the victims of his feeding absolutely no pleasure whatsoever — only terror and pain. The vampire is forced to grapple with their struggling victim for as long as he wishes to take their blood, which tends to pose a problem for those with a high Humanity.
    • In addition, there is the Nagaraja bloodline, whose members need to eat the flesh (major organs, mainly) as well as the blood of their victims, and a Flaw called 'Conspicuous Consumption' — a delusion that causes the same effect to other vampires. Needless to say, "The Kiss" is not an option for these vampires unless they want to put down their victim painlessly by blood drain first.
    • The Kuei-jin or Cathayan, Asian vampires in Kindred of the East, lack fangs in their default form, so they need to draw blood using a blade or some other artificial means, or spend a point of Mana to manually grow fangs. (This assumes they're not enlightened enough to subsist on a victim's breath or simply draw upon the ambient energy of the universe, but are sufficiently enlightened that they no longer need to consume the flesh of their prey.)
    • The Lamia bloodline in Vampire: the Dark Ages, an offshoot of the Cappadocians, would harm whoever they fed from, namely through a hideous plague. When Augustus Giovanni wiped out their parent clan, he also personally handled the destruction of the Lamia - it's believed that the Giovanni fall under this trope as either a curse from the Lamia bloodline or as an unintended result from the diablerie of the bloodline.
  • In Vampire: The Requiem:
    • The Noctuku, a Nosferatu bloodline that has the irresistible urge to devour the flesh of their prey. Of course, they can't digest it, which makes their dinners rather... unpleasant. For bonus points, they actually revel in this and prefer hunting other vampires to anything else.
    • Then there's the Qedeshah, another bloodline: not only does their bite hurt but any attempts to Embrace men end in screaming, painful agony.
    • The Norvegi bloodline, whose inherited flaw is that they lack fangs. That means that they have to use something sharp, and it hurts precisely as much as some bastard slitting your wrist with a knife then latching onto it and trying to suck your blood out does. Which is to say, a lot. On the other hand, their special power, Bloodworking, does mean that they can turn their hands into organic bone-knives which drain your blood when you're stabbed. Still hurts like hell, though.
    • While they still experience the pleasurable intoxication that most vampire bites cause, victims of the Eupraxus bloodline have a problem when it comes to being fed from - the vampire cannot lick the wound to close it. This often leads to the unfortunate situation of a human haemorrhaging to death while still moaning pleasurably, at least until the intoxication wears off. And because their bite marks don't heal, being embraced by one of these vampires leads to an eternity of wearing scarves or roll-neck jumpers just to cover the holes in your throat.

    Video Games 
  • Rayne's full body, arm-and-thigh-locking embrace appears to stun her victims with pleasure in BloodRayne. But if the Kiss is ever broken, Mooks can go right back to attacking without a lingering pause.
  • In Castlevania: Lords of Shadow 2, Dracula's feeding methods are pretty cringe-worthy. He'll either bite down hard on a person's jugular before ripping him/her apart in a spray of bloody mist, slit the throat open before chowing down, drain victims until they become withered husks, or rip their hearts out and pop them like grapes to drink the blood. Gabriel feeding off Marie is somewhere between this and Kiss of the Vampire; he tries not to hurt her, and it's completely consensual (if anything she's happier with the idea than he is), but it's still messy.
  • Dwarf Fortress: While the bites themselves are discreet enough to not wake people up or gain much suspicion, the amounts of blood drained in an instant are definitely not pretty. Most creatures will die when bitten by another of equal species and size, and those that survive will be faint for several days and need a lot of rest.
  • In Fate/stay night, Rider requires blood as a source of mana to maintain her physical form. She doesn't tend to care much about what happens to the victim after being bitten and will drain them completely if she feels like it, as seen in at least one bad end and also referenced to at the beginning of Heavens Feel. Because she's not actually a vampire, she has no fangs and has to bite with a human set of teeth, which is as fun for the victim as it sounds. Oddly enough, she's actually a good guy when she gets a chance to make her own decisions, though she does still enjoy drinking blood.
  • In The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, the feeding bites of your standard-issue vampires are apparently painless. The feeding bite, however, of the eight-foot-tall half-bat Volkihar Vampire Lord? Not so much. However, you can still feed the nice way when you are not wearing the Game Face. The difference is particularly visible in how you can become a Volkihar Vampire Lord in-game. If you are aligned with the vampire-hunting Dawnguard, you get the gift from Serana, who bites you in human form and does her best to make it as painless as possible (in fact, the scene borders on Ship Tease). If you chose to join the Volkihar Clan, on the other hand? You get the gift from Lord Harkon, who bites you in his One-Winged Angel form. This causes you to fall unconscious, and when you wake up, he casually informs you that you were lucky to survive the transformation.
  • In Legacy of Kain, Kain has shown a preference for hoisting victims into the air with one hand and then gruesomely chowing down on their jugular— with crunching noises— when he isn't telekinetically vacuuming their blood from afar.
  • The Sims 4 Vampires game pack: Any Sim who offers their wrist for a vampire to drink from will eventually grimace, yell in pain and shove the vampire off. Victims of nonconsensual biting are too stunned to react. Regardless of whether the biting was consensual or not, the drained sim will get an uncomfortable moodlet.
  • Touhou Project's Remilia Scarlet was given the nickname "the Scarlet Devil" due to her extremely messy feeding habits - she requires very little blood, but she spills far more of it than she needs. Often, her clothes end up soaking more blood than she actually drank herself.
  • In Tsukihime, assuming the vampire doesn't just eat you, the bite is actually pretty mild. Unfortunately, the vampire will also put a little of its own blood back into you, which is horribly painful and makes you feel "as though you have mud in your veins".

  • Charby the Vampirate has depicted vampire bites as extremely brutal and violent with increasing attention to making them the most grisly and disturbing element in a comic which has a fairly high amount of gore and violence in it.
  • In The Order of the Stick, due to its art style humanoids have no visible neck. As a result Malack tries turning Belkar by biting straight into his head. And as a lizardfolk vampire his teeth cover a lot more than the human sort.

    Web Original 

    Western Animation 
  • The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy makes a nod to vampire bats in the episode "Fear And Loathing In Endsville", when Grim suffers a poisonous sting and asks Dracula (who in this show is an old black man who talks like Redd Foxx) to suck the poison out of his blood (apparently he somehow has blood despite being a skeleton).
    Dracula: Uh-uh! Dracula don't suck!
    Grim: You're a vampire! Vampires suck! Blood!
    Dracula: Naw, see, that's a myth. Dracula scrape with his fangs and lick up the blood. Like this: [waggles tongue] See? Scrape... and lick. [waggles tongue] Scrape... and lick. [waggles tongue]
    Grim: [trembling in agony] But what about m'poison?
    Dracula: Didn't you just hear Dracula explain the scrape-and-lick?! Dracula gonna tell it again for dummies that don't pay attention! Scrape. And. Lick. [waggles tongue as Grim collapses from poison] Scrape. And. Lick. [waggles tongue] Scrape. And. Lick. [waggles tongue]
  • Due to the Media Watchdogs, Spider-Man: The Animated Series couldn't have its adaptation of Morbius the Living Vampire (a biochemist transformed into a vampire-like being through a failed experiment — in this case, being bitten by a vampire bat that drank some of Spider-Man's blood Morbius was irradiating to examine how it was created) drink blood by biting necks, the way the comic version did. So, to get around this, they gave him a set of five sucking, rasping lamprey-like mouth/orifices in each hand. These usually were depicted as leaving bloody holes wherever Morbius had touched a victim to feed — and he tended to feed by clasping both hands onto a human's face. He also drained plasma, not blood. The writers must be fans of the above JoJo's Bizarre Adventure.