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True Love Is a Kink

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Diamanda Hagan: What kind of crazy mother-fucker has a fantasy like that? "I want to get married with someone I love so very much and"... why am I alone?
Random Minion: I'm here for you, mistress. [Walks up and hugs Diamanda Hagan.]
Diamanda Hagan: Get the fuck away from me! [Brandishing a knife up to Random Minion.]
Random Minion: That's why you're alone. [Random Minion walks off-camera. Diamond Hagan throws knife at Random Minion.]
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True Love is not this attainable thing that one could find and put in a cage and listen to it sing all the ding-dong day. Love (true or otherwise) is like water; it changes form, can only stay in the palm of your hand until it drains through and inevitably dries out completely. ...That Came Out Wrong.

Pictured as an erotic form of Mundane Made Awesome, True Love (or at least an adult game based around it) can really stimulate certain erogenous zones based on idealistic nostalgia alone. Vanilla-scented candles, heart-shaped boxes full of chocolate-flavored condoms, elaborately-laced wedding-dresses (for both the "bride" and "the groom"), engagement rings (and not for fingers if. You. Know. What. I'm. Saying!), heart-shaped pasties... edible wedding-garters... licking wedding cake off of one another...

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...I'm sorry, I'm going to need a few minutes...

See also Casual Kink, Last Wish Marriage, Marry for Love, In Love with Love, W.A.F.F. and Your Normal Is Our Taboo. Compare Good People Have Good Sex and True Love Is Exceptional and contrast True Love Is Boring. Can also occur with Insatiable Newlyweds.


Examples:

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    Films — Live-Action 
  • In Tromeo and Juliet, the titular Tromeo Que has a brief scene where he masturbates furiously to a pornographic interactive computer game with a list of fetishes to pleasure himself to. Which does he choose?
    In-game Voice: You chose true love.
  • In Preaching to the Perverted, Peter Emery was able to get the BDSM Dominatrix queen Tanya Cheex so drunk that he gets her to admit her darkest fantasy; getting married and having sex with her husband in a hotel room.
  • Deadpool 2: Wade and Vanessa have plenty of Casual Kink in their relationship, but also talk about settling down and starting a family as a form of foreplay. Vanessa even makes a romantic gift out of showing Wade that she's no longer on birth control.

    Literature 
  • Aurora in The Robots of Dawn is a Free-Love Future, with exclusivity considered weird even for married people. However, Gremionis is in love with with Gladia and dreams of a monogamous relationship with her:
    Gremionis: I don't want anyone else... How should I know why that is? I want Gladia. It's a—it's a kind of madness, except that I think it's the best kind of insanity. I'd be mad not to have that kind of madness.—I don't expect you to understand... Imagine having your mind out of whack and wanting it to stay out of whack. Any mentologist would put me in for major treatment.
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     Live-Action Series 
  • How I Met Your Mother has a more platonic example: Barney requests stories of being Happily Married from Marshall like children ask for fairytales at bedtime. In a romantic sense, Marshall and Lily are these to one another since day one of their relationship and never had any other relationship since then, barring the time Marshall almost had a rebound with a loony barista. They bring mementos when they're apart, and they get cranky when they don't have sex, and when they do, they do it literally in a jiffy.
  • Played with in "I Think I Like You" from Crazy Ex-Girlfriend - Rebecca and Greg are Friends with Benefits, and their sex life is doing great, but Rebecca is starting to catch feelings, so as the camera shows him pushing her head down towards his waist she can't stop thinking about getting married to him on a hillside surrounded by ducks. Naturally, it's that she's far more disturbed by.

    Web Original 
  • Klingons in Star Trek have a predilection for very rough sex (a broken collarbone on the wedding night is considered a good omen for the marriage). This Tumblr joke suggests that the Klingon equivalent of BDSM is to "gather in secrecy in dark cellars to engage in sweet, gentle loving, to the scorn of fellow Klingons."

    Webcomic 

    Web Video 
  • During Diamanda Hagan's review of Preaching to the Perverted, it is implied that she shares Tanya's desire to find and marry her one true love. Justified, as Hagan claims that the film is based on true events, with her being the inspiration for Tanya Cheex.


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