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True Love Is a Kink

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Diamanda Hagan: What kind of crazy mother-fucker has a fantasy like that? "I want to get married with someone I love so very much and"... why am I alone?
Random Minion: I'm here for you, mistress. [walks up and hugs Diamanda Hagan]
Diamanda Hagan: Get the fuck away from me! [brandishing a knife up to Random Minion]
Random Minion: That's why you're alone. [Random Minion walks off-camera; Diamond Hagan throws knife at Random Minion]

Ah, love. It can take many forms. In Western culture, the traditional image of a loving couple involves monogamy, hand-holding, kissing, marriage, sex in the missionary position, and having children. This is as vanilla as it gets. On the opposite end, you have the, let's say "sexually liberated", who engage in polyamory, casual sex, open and shameless discussion of sexuality, and experimenting with various positions, toys, and fetishes.

Generally, people who stick closer to the "traditional" side view behaviors associated with the "liberated" side as taboo, perhaps even immoral, but also as tempting and exciting. So what about the other way around? If someone is involved enough in the kink community, the idea of a vanilla relationship could end up becoming just as exciting to them as kink is to someone who's more sexually conservative. This may have something to do with desiring the comforting familiarity of having one partner who's always there for you at the end of the day.

This trope can also be used to create Deliberate Values Dissonance: in a Free-Love Future, or even among races for whom the concept of "settling down with a partner and raising a family" doesn't exist, what we view as a vanilla relationship could be considered kinky and deviant, which is usually Played for Laughs.

See also Casual Kink, Last Wish Marriage, Marry for Love, In Love with Love, W.A.F.F., and Your Normal Is Our Taboo. Compare True Love is Exceptional and contrast True Love Is Boring. Can also occur with Insatiable Newlyweds.


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    Anime and Manga 
  • Yuuutsu-kun to Succubus-san: Demons in general, and succubi in particular. have an inverted idea of what is and is not appropriate in a relationship. Sakuma the succubus, for example, considers watching pornos a wholesome family activity, and, as a result, her Porn Stash consists of books with titles like "Pure Pure Love". The sight of a couple holding hands in public shocks her as she regards it as something that would get censored on television.

    Fan Works 
  • Klingons in Star Trek have a predilection for very rough sex (a broken collarbone on the wedding night is considered a good omen for the marriage). This Tumblr joke suggests that the Klingon equivalent of BDSM is to "gather in secrecy in dark cellars to engage in sweet, gentle loving, to the scorn of fellow Klingons."

    Films — Live-Action 
  • In Tromeo and Juliet, the titular Tromeo Que has a brief scene where he masturbates furiously to a pornographic interactive computer game with a list of fetishes to pleasure himself to. Which does he choose?
    In-game Voice: You chose true love.
  • In Preaching to the Perverted, Peter Emery was able to get the BDSM Dominatrix queen Tanya Cheex so drunk that he gets her to admit her darkest fantasy; getting married and having sex with her husband in a hotel room.
  • Deadpool 2: Wade and Vanessa have plenty of Casual Kink in their relationship, but also talk about settling down and starting a family as a form of foreplay. Vanessa even makes a romantic gift out of showing Wade that she's no longer on birth control.

  • Aurora in The Robots of Dawn is a Free-Love Future, with exclusivity considered weird even for married people. However, Gremionis is in love with with Gladia and dreams of a monogamous relationship with her:
    Gremionis: I don't want anyone else... How should I know why that is? I want Gladia. It's a—it's a kind of madness, except that I think it's the best kind of insanity. I'd be mad not to have that kind of madness.—I don't expect you to understand... Imagine having your mind out of whack and wanting it to stay out of whack. Any mentologist would put me in for major treatment.
  • Lenina from Brave New World is shamed by her friends for dating one guy at a time for months on end, as their society encourages all relationships to be purely physical, no-strings-attached hookups

    Live-Action TV 
  • How I Met Your Mother:
    • A more platonic example: Barney requests stories of being Happily Married from Marshall like children ask for fairytales at bedtime.
    • In a romantic sense, Marshall and Lily are these to one another since day one of their relationship and never had any other relationship since then, barring the time Marshall almost had a rebound with a loony barista. They bring mementos when they're apart, and they get cranky when they don't have sex, and when they do, they do it literally in a jiffy.
  • Played with in "I Think I Like You" from Crazy Ex-Girlfriend - Rebecca and Greg are Friends with Benefits, and their sex life is doing great, but Rebecca is starting to catch feelings, so as the camera shows him pushing her head down towards his waist she can't stop thinking about getting married to him on a hillside surrounded by ducks. Naturally, it's that she's far more disturbed by.

    Video Games 
  • Helltaker: Modeus, the Lustful Demon, finds out about romance after reading some romantic comedies and finds it to be lewder than anything she's ever seen.
    Helltaker: Do you want to go out on a date?
    Modeus: [incredibly flustered] I've always known you were a perverted degenerate.


    Web Videos 
  • During Diamanda Hagan's review of Preaching to the Perverted, it is implied that she shares Tanya's desire to find and marry her one true love. Justified, as Hagan claims that the film is based on true events, with her being the inspiration for Tanya Cheex.


Video Example(s):


Diamanda Hagan

There is more to Hagan than a supervillain dictator.

How well does it match the trope?

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Main / TrueLoveIsAKink

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