Quagmire just discovered the internet.
"I implore you. I implore all women everywhere on behalf of all men. Do not take the wrongness of masturbation from us!"
— Steve, Coupling
Plenty of people have dates with ol' Rosie Palms, although it's not something you'd bring up in polite conversation. However, it's given quite a different treatment in fiction. Unlike Nobody Poops or No Periods, Period (where the function is simply not mentioned because it would be Nausea Fuel), masturbation in fiction often fits into a few different categories:
- It's aimed at or about teenagers (usually Played for Laughs) and the character is usually a horny teenage boy, and another character, usually the parents, think that he's masturbating when he is very obviously (or sometimes not so obviously) not.
- The character masturbating is sexually frustrated, disturbed, perverted, or is a nerd/has no social life. When Sex Is Cool and Everybody Has Lots of Sex, masturbating is portrayed as a shameful last resort for losers who can't get laid. Except for those depicted doing it as one part of a sexual encounter itself, of course.
- It's a single-sex setting such as a prison, boarding school, or military vessel, and the character is uninterested in a same-sex encounter, so they take matters into their own... hands.
- Artificial insemination due to lack of partners, incompatible sexual orientation, etc.
- In porn or erotica, it can be used for the sexual titillation of the viewers.
These tropes cover various concepts related to masturbation.
Tropes:
- Breaking In Old Habits: A character receives a replacement hand and immediately uses it to masturbate.
- Caught with Your Pants Down: A character is caught masturbating.
- G-Rated Sex: For when masturbation can’t be shown outright but is implied.
- I'll Be in My Bunk: A character who steps off-stage is humorously portrayed as leaving to masturbate.
- Jizzed in My Pants: Premature ejaculation while the character is still clothed.
- Man, I Feel Like a Woman: After a man transforms into a woman, the first thing he does is test his new "equipment".
- Masturbation Means Sexual Frustration: Masturbation is used to denote a character is sexually frustrated or repressed.
- Mistaken for Masturbating: Characters think someone is masturbating when they actually aren't.
- Pink Is Erotic: The color pink represents eroticism and scenes of a sexual nature.
- Poor Man's Porn: A character gets off to something not strictly intended to be used for that purpose.
- Porn Stash: A character has a personal collection of pornography, and can usually be assumed to use it as an aid to masturbation.
- Psychosexual Horror: A subgenre that explores psychosexual development as a subject matter, including themes of sexual development and sexual activities.
- Screw Yourself: Having sex with a clone or alternate counterpart of yourself would technically be masturbation taken to the next level.
- Self-Abuse: Masturbation is portrayed as bad for you.
(Opening door) Oops! Sorry! When you said you were going on the computer for a while, I just assumed you'd be on TV Tropes!
