Stock Aesops

"If you believe in yourself, eat all your school, stay in milk, drink your teeth, don't do sleep, and get 8 hours of drugs, you can get work!"

— Mr. T parody, TV Funhouse

Stock Aesops are the morals that the writers and producers of TV most often love to explore. They sometimes contradict each other, but it's a clumsy writer indeed who sticks two contradictory aesops into the same script, which tends to create a Broken Aesop. When An Aesop contradicts the typical beliefs of society^note the Hard Work Fallacy, offends the Moral Guardians^note Violence Really Is the Answer, or promotes an "unconventional" belief ^note Higher Understanding Through Drugs, it's a Family-Unfriendly Aesop.

Because Society Marches On, some older Aesops tend to be seen as Fair For Their Day or Values Dissonance.

Many are Older Than Feudalism. And some, indeed, come straight from the original Aesop's Fables.

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Examples:

On Agreement

• Strange Minds Think Alike
• The Foolish Seldom Differ
• Agree to Disagree
• With Us or Against Us: You choose one or the other. There's no middle ground.

On Ambition

• Aspire To Greater Things, and work hard to achieve them
• Living Is More Than Surviving: A Man's Reach Should Exceed His Grasp.
• Carpe Diem: Seize the day, for you may not live tomorrow.
• It's the Journey That Counts
• Ambition Is Evil: Unfortunately, that also makes you evil.
• It's Lonely at the Top
• Be Careful What You Wish For: Ya just might get it.
• Sweet and Sour Grapes: Learn to appreciate your situation as it is.

On Appearance, Beauty, and Clothing

• Beauty Is Bad
• Beauty Equals Goodness
• Clothes Make The Man
• Don't Judge a Book by Its Cover
• Evil Is Sexy
• Evil Makes You Ugly
• Good People Dress Modestly
• True Beauty Is on the Inside
• Uncleanliness Is Next to Ungodliness
• Beware the Wolf in Sheep's Clothing
• Beware a Man of Wealth and Taste
• Take Pride In Your Appearance
• Don't Be Vain

On Authority, Government

• Democracy Is Bad
• Democracy Is Flawed
• Trust Authority
• TV Never Lies: Question Authority
• Disobey This Message: We're Telling You, Think For Yourself
• You Cannot Kill An Idea
• It's My Country, Right or Wrong
• War crimes are bad, even if you were Just Following Orders.
• Rousseau Was Right: There is good in humanity.
• Hobbes Was Right: Leading through fear is necessary.
• Machiavelli Was Wrong: Leading through fear is bad.
• Gentle Touch vs. Firm Hand: Lead with a balance of softness and strictness.

On Belief

• Belief Makes You Stupid
• Lack of Belief Makes You Stupid
• Hope Springs Eternal

On Caution and planning

• Live Dangerously and Throw Caution To The Wind.
• Look Before You Leap.
• He Who Hesitates Is Lost. Strike While The Iron is Hot.
• An Ounce of Prevention is Worth a Pound of Cure.
• Hoist by His Own Petard: The Best Laid Plans of Mice and Men often go awry.
• Be very careful with tools designed to kill.

On Change, Progress, and Technology

• Good Old Ways: Change Is Bad.
• Ludd Was Right: Progress is Bad.
• Evil Luddite: Progress Is Good.

On Conformity, Individuality, and Tradition

• Be Yourself: Accept who you are.
• Pygmalion Snap Back: Accept people for who they are and let others be themselves.
• Conform to Expectations, 'cause great-grandma knows best.
• Crying Wolf is a bad idea.
• The Complainer Is Always Wrong: You should always agree with your friends.
• Peer Pressure Makes You Evil: Don't give into peer pressure.
• Trend Aesop: Giving into materialism, peer pressure, and/or the silly/fickle nature of fashion is more trouble than it is worth.
• Blithe Spirit: Change tradition and convert everyone else to your views.
• Tall Poppy Syndrome: The Nail That Stands Out Gets Hammered Flat.

On Cruelty, Kindness, and Trust

• Power of Trust: Trust makes people stronger
• Betrayal Tropes: Some people should not be trusted
• Children Are Innocent
• Kids Are Cruel
• Androcles' Lion: Kindness is returned in kind.
• Laser-Guided Karma: Cruelty is returned in kind.
• Don't be All Take and No Give, because in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make.
• The Farmer and the Viper: Don't be kind to evil.
• Good Is Not Soft: Don't take kindness for weakness.
• Misery Builds Character: A little suffering is good for the soul.
• Enemies Equals Greatness: Having enemies is good for you.
• The Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have done unto you.
• The best REAL magic is being kind and good to others!
• Too Smart for Strangers: Don't trust people you don't know, especially if you're a kid.

On Curiosity and Science

• Curiosity Killed the Cast: Curiosity killed the cat.
• Curiosity saved the cat.
• Curiosity Is a Crapshoot
• Keep an open mind and be willing to try new things (like Green Eggs and Ham) — maybe you'll like them!
• There are Things Man Was Not Meant to Know
• Science Is Bad
• Science Is Good
• Science Makes You Crazy

On Destiny

• Because Destiny Says So: Accept Your Destiny
• Screw Destiny: Shape Your Own Destiny
• There Are No Coincidences: Nothing Happens By Chance; Everything Is Destined

On Diet

• Always eat your vegetables.
• Junk food is bad.

On Differences

• Prejudice and discrimination is stupid and wrong. Treat others with equal dignity and respect.
  • Fantastic Racism: A lesson against real-life bigotry, but filtered through (not-so-)subtle allegories and metaphors.
  • Gay Aesop: Treat LGBT people with acceptance and tolerance.
• Handy Shortcoming
• Your differences are minuscule, just get along already!

On Drugs

• Drugs Are Bad, mmmkay?
• Drugs Are Good! They let you achieve Higher Understanding Through Drugs because... uh... reasons!

On Effort

• If something is worth doing at all, it's worth doing well.
• Failing Is Better Than Doing Nothing
• Quality over Quantity: Few but high-quality trumps many but low-quality.
• Cheaters Never Prosper
• No Challenge Equals No Satisfaction: It's no fun winning unless you actually had to put in an effort.
• All the talent in the world won't mean anything if you don't hone it, unless you're Jimi Hendrix.

On Entertainment

• Old Media Are Evil
  • TV Rots Your Brain
• New Media Are Evil
  • TV Tropes Will Ruin Your Life
• Think of the Children!: You are responsible for the kids' well-being, not the media.
• Digital Piracy Is Evil
• Digital Piracy Is Okay
• In Defence Of Story Telling
  • Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus.
• "Reading Is Cool" Aesop: Reading can be really fun and useful.
• Anti-Escapism Aesop: Reality is better than fiction.

On Family

• Blood is Thicker Than Water: Your Relatives Are Your Best Friends
• Family Is A Hindrance: Show The Other Generation What You're Really Worth

On Force

• Forgiveness: You should forgive those who wrong you. Unless you shouldn't.
  • Forgiven, but Not Forgotten: ...and even if you did, you should never forget what they've done.
• Turn the Other Cheek: Break The Cycle of Revenge.
• Right Makes Might
• Vengeance Feels Empty: Getting revenge won't give you satisfaction you hoped for.
• He Who Fights Monsters: Getting revenge will make you just as bad as the villain.
• Violence Really Is the Answer
  • Violence Is the Only Option
• If You Kill Him, You Will Be Just Like Him
• If You Taunt Him, You Will Be Just Like Him
• Disproportionate Retribution: Going over and beyond punishing wrongdoers is never good.
• True strength is not about who can hit hardest.

On Friendship

• The Power of Friendship conquers all.
• Poisonous Friend: Well, maybe they weren't really your friends.
• Loners Are Freaks: If you don't have friends, there's something wrong with you.
• In the End, You Are on Your Own: However, even if you have friends they won't always be there, and there's some things you have to do yourself.
• Loony Friends Improve Your Personality
• Be a Friend to All Living Things
• Somebody Doesn't Love Raymond: Not everyone in the world has to like you, for a friend to all is a friend to none.
• Befriending the Enemy: Making friends with an enemy will cause them to change their ways.

On Honesty

• Don't Be Completely Honest (The Truth Hurts, and Little White Lies Are Comforting And Convenient. And of course, you must protect your Secret Identity.)
  • They're Called Personal Issues for a Reason
• Honest Axe: Honesty Is The Best Policy (And Will Totally Get You The Infinity +1 Sword)

On Honor

• Honor Before Reason is bad
• Not Cheating Unless You Get Caught
• What You Are in the Dark matters

On Immortality

• Living Forever Is Awesome: Immortality rules!
• Who Wants to Live Forever?: Immortality sucks!

On Initiative

• Leeroy Jenkins: Fools rush in.
• Missed the Call: He who hesitates is lost.

On Intellectualism

• TV Genius, Book Dumb, Dumb Is Good, Brilliant, but Lazy: Studying Is Overrated
• Awesome by Analysis: Knowledge is power.

On Intuition and first impressions

• Don't Think, Feel
• First Impressions Are Misleading: Sometimes things are More Than Meets the Eye
• Subverted Suspicion Aesop: Always trust your first impressions.

On Justice

• Freudian Excuse: Cut your Arch-Enemy some slack — he had a rough childhood.
• Freudian Excuse is No Excuse: Two wrongs don't make a right.
• As Long as There Is One Man...
  • Justice Will Prevail,
  • and Evil Will Fail, because Evil Cannot Comprehend Good.

On Kinship

• Blood Is Thicker Than Water
• Doesn't Trust Those Guys: Don't be racist; they can't all be that bad, despite their relatives all being evil.

On Literature

• Actions Speak Louder Than Words.
• The Pen is Mightier Than The Sword.

On Love

• Cupid Hates Odd Couples: Friendship Is More Important Than Love
• The Power of Love conquers all.
• Wrong Guy First: Be careful who you give your heart to.
• Love at First Sight: You'll just know when your true love shows up, what with the golden lights and floating hearts and all.
• Love at First Punch: You'll hate each other at first, though.
• Love Makes You Crazy
• Love Makes You Dumb: Love can override common sense.
• Love Makes You Evil: Love can bring out the worst in people.
• Love Redeems: Love can bring out the best in people.

On Material Possessions and Wealth

• Capitalism Is Bad
• All That Glitters is not gold.
• Grail in the Garbage
• One Man's Trash Is Another's Treasure
• You can have all the Solid Gold Poop you want, it's worthless.
• Wanting Is Better Than Having
• The True Meaning of Christmas: It's better to give than to receive.
• You Get What You Pay For
• A Fool and His New Money Are Soon Parted
• A penny saved is a penny earned.

On Patience

• All Good Things Come To He Who Waits.
• Time and Tide Wait For No Man.

On Perseverance

• Determinator: Never give up.
• Evil Is Easy, but it takes true fortitude to do the right thing.
• Hope Springs Eternal
• Know When to Fold 'Em: Sometimes you have to give up.

On Positive and Negative attitude

• Anti-Nihilist: Life sucks, but we can make it better.
• Determined Defeatist: You're bound to fail, but still try anyways.
• The Pollyanna: Keep a positive attitude in times of peril.
• Silly Rabbit, Cynicism Is for Losers!: Take off those Jade-Colored Glasses and don't be negative.
• Silly Rabbit, Idealism Is for Kids!: Being a Wide-Eyed Idealist is foolish.

On Pride

• Don't Play God: it never ends well.
• Pride comes before a fall.

On Principle

• You Have To Be Willing To Compromise
• Stick To Your Guns

On Relationships

• Birds of a Feather Flock Together.
• Opposites Attract.

On Sex

• Death by Sex: Just Don't Do It
• But We Used a Condom: "Condoms are effective, not perfect." Though this storyline is used so often, it ends up feeling more like "Condoms don't work at all, so don't even bother with them."
• Sex Equals Love (even when it's rape)
• Love Is Not Sex
• Can't Have Sex, Ever: Love is more important than sex
• Virginity Makes You Stupid, Sex as Rite-of-Passage: You aren't an adult until you've had sex.

On Specialization

• Master of None: You can do everything, but you can't do everything THAT well if you can't be the Jack of All Trades.
• Crippling Overspecialization: You do one thing very well, but you can't do anything else straight.

On Spontaneity

• Don't Be Shy
• Don't Get In Over Your Head

On Teamwork

• Two heads are better than one. Many hands make light work.
• Too Many Cooks Spoil the Soup

On Time

• Have Fun Like You Were Dying
• Work Now To Enjoy A Great Future

On War

• War Is Hell: War is just cruel and terrible bloodshed. Can we please give peace a chance?
  • Armies Are Evil: Soldiers are weak-willed drones who exist only to kill and destroy.
• War Is Glorious: War is a heroic and patriotic adventure. Pacifism is for cowardly traitors!
  • Straw Civilian: Civilians are spineless cowards who have no sense of duty or responsibility.

On Women

• Treat Girls Nice
• Treat Girls The Same As Guys
• You Go, Girl!: Women are just as good as men.
• Women Are Wiser: Women are totally awesome and possess unique wisdom men don't have.
• Recognize People's Differences

The Lessons of History

• A Lesson in Defeat: The greatest teacher, failure is.
• The Dinosaurs Had It Coming: Immoral behavior is what drives species extinct.
• Hitler's Time-Travel Exemption Act: The past shapes the best of all possible presents.

Other Aesops

• Follow the Seven Heavenly Virtues.
• Avoid the Seven Deadly Sins.
• Be careful where you get your power, your validation, and the justification for your actions.
• When Life Gives You Lemons..., make lemonade!
• Green Aesop: Because pollution is bad.
• Give a Man a Fish... and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.
• ...and the reason for all the contradictions is the Golden Mean: Nothing In Excess. Everything in moderation, including moderation.

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For every proverb, there is an equal and opposite proverb.