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Fake Period Excuse

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Having to deal with bleeding and cramps every month can suck. But for all the other days, it can be a handy excuse if one has to sneak out of work or keep folks from searching your stuff.

Bringing up one's own period in fiction usually results in men not wanting to hear any more quickly, due to the assumption that All Periods Are PMS.


Examples:

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    Anime & Manga 
  • At one point in Horimiya, Ishikawa claims that Miyamura is having his period to explain why he can't go to the baths with everyone else (the real reason is because they'd find out about his tattoos). The other guys don't even question this despite it being a Blatant Lie. Miyamura would later reuse this excuse to get out of having to take part in a mandatory pool class.
    Fanfiction 
  • Indirect example in The Second Try. Misato claims that Asuka is having her period to explain why her Sync Ratio had dropped.
    Live Action Film 
  • In Monty Python's The Meaning of Life, a diner, faced with the appalling prospect of having Mr. Creosote at the next table, uses the excuse of suddenly realizing she's having a really heavy period and consequently not wishing to bleed all over the carpet, as her excuse to get the hell out of the place quickly.
  • In The Amazing Spider-Man, Peter Parker crashes into Gwen's room while heavily wounded. To keep her father Officer Stacy from finding him, she calls off all requests to come down for dinner, then starts to apologize for her outburst by blaming it on period cramps. Immediately her dad doesn't want to hear any more.
  • In Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, Queenie smuggles Newt, Tina, and Jacob out of the MACUSA headquarters by claiming she's feeling unwell and taking the rest of the day off. When her supervisor asks what she's carrying in Newt's suitcase, her response is "lady things." She even invites him to take a closer look, but he declines and sends her on her way.
    Literature 
  • The Bible: Older Than Feudalism. In the Biblical book of Genesis, Rachel steals her father's idols just before she and her husband's caravan leave. When her father catches up to Jacob and accuses him of stealing, Jacob lets him search his entire property, saying (not knowing who did it) that anyone who stole the idols will be put to death. Rachel keeps her father from finding them by sitting on top of the saddle where she hid them, while claiming she's on her period and thereby making anything she touches unclean. As a result, he never finds them.
  • The first October Daye book has Toby begging off work by implying her period is troubling her to her manager at her mortal job.
  • A variant in Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret.. Nancy pretends to get her first period to try to impress her friends. This backfires when it actually does happen later and Margaret witnesses Nancy panic.
    Live-Action TV 
  • Agent Carter: In the first episode, Peggy overhears her fellow agents planning a secret infiltration of a nightclub hiding stolen weapons. Not invited along due to being a woman, she asks to go home early due to "female matters", and promptly gets the time off to plan her own investigation.
  • An episode of The Nanny had Maggie faking her period as an excuse to get out of gym class.
  • Amanita does this to buy time in Sense8
     Theatre 
  • Be More Chill: Right before "Michael in the Bathroom", Michael is sitting alone in the bathroom after Jeremy betrays him and someone knocks on the door, demanding to use the bathroom. Michael yells back that he is on his period so he doens't have to leave. Somehow, the other person believes him.
    Video Games 
  • One optional puzzle in the text adventure "Stone Cell" is for the player character, a teenage girl, to hide a medallion from a female searcher. The solution: Hide it in her underpants, and stain them with blood so the searcher mistakes the bulge for a menstrual pad.
  • If you try to take Isabela to the Qunari compound in Dragon Age II, she'll leave your active party - possibly with "female problems" as an excuse.
  • In Life Is Strange: Before the Storm, Chloe uses this excuse on the security guard Skip in order to get into the Boy’s Dormitories. Whether it works or not depends on how well she argues.
    Chloe: En fuego utero, Skip! En fuego utero!
    Western Animation 
  • In Bob's Burgers, Tina mentions that one of her classmates actively tried to get her period to skip a test.
  • In the Trollhunters episode "Airheads", Claire was able to get out of class to help Tobes with a gravity curse by telling the teacher that she was having "girl problems".


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