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Machinima / The Spy Fights Godzilla ᶠᵒʳ ˢᵒᵐᵉ ʳᵉᵃˢᵒⁿ

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"DAMN MONSTER! I hate you!"(Godzilla's response?) 
The Spy Fights Godzilla ᶠᵒʳ ˢᵒᵐᵉ ʳᵉᵃˢᵒⁿ is a Team Fortress 2 machinima, also starring Godzilla from the series of the same name, made by UntouchedShadow. The story revolves around the BLU Spy and his team fighting Godzilla for some unspecified reason. Lots of wacky hijinks ensue.

The machinima includes examples of:

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  • Baguette Beatdown: At one point in the Behemoth Battle, the Spy whacks Godzilla in the face with a giant Baguette.
  • Benevolent Boss: Despite yelling at them for being stupid (which to be fair, they mostly are), the Spy is surprisingly tolerant of his team's shenanigans. For instance, when the Soldier Screams Like a Little Girl after being called an idiot for shooting literal batteries at Godzilla, Spy immediately apologizes. Earlier in this video, when the same Soldier mentions he is scared and brings up Godzilla as the reason, Spy's response is to declare his hatred for the kaiju instead of berating the Soldier.
  • Behemoth Battle: In the second half of the video, after he grows to Kaiju sizes by snorting the crystal meth, the Spy fights Godzilla as an equal-sized opponent.
  • Berserk Button: The Spy already declared his hatred for Godzilla, but he seems especially distraught and angered by the 2fort Bridge being destroyed.
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  • Chairman of the Brawl: It's a bit hard to see due to the dim lighting, but right before the above-mentioned Baguette Beatdown, Godzilla breaks a giant wooden chair over the Spy.
  • Destructive Savior: In the end, the Spy and the BLU team successfully defeat Godzilla by vote-kicking him, with the Spy proclaiming that they managed to save Teufort...ignoring the enormous collateral damage that was done in the process. The Medic quickly calls him out on this.
    Spy: Well, Doctor, we did it! We saved Teufort!
    [The rest of Teufort is now in flaming ruins]
    Medic: Spy! You idiot! You are STUPID!
  • Deus ex Machina: The Helicopter Heavy acts as this for the Spy. Just as Godzilla blew a bunch of bloody holes in him with a giant shotgun and he declares he's failed, Heavy shows up to heal him with a giant Sandvich and get him back into the fight. Then he is never seen again in the entire video.
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  • Dirty Coward: The Scout at the beginning of the video bails on the Spy and the rest of the team within the first 10 seconds of the video.
  • Drugs Are Good: The crystal meth here allows the Spy to grow Kaiju-sized, which lets him fight Godzilla one-on-one. Though as he's snorting it, a bunch of floating text saying "DRUGS ARE BAD OK" can be seen floating in the background.
  • Excuse Plot: Lampshaded by the video title itself. The Spy from Team Fortress 2 fights Godzilla, for some unspecified reason. In fact, UntouchedShadow had admitted in the video description that he animated the whole video as an excuse to have the Spy use General Gyozen's lines (as both of them share the same voice actor, complete with similar voices).
  • Eye Pop: Godzilla's eyes burst through his sunglasses when he sees the Kaiju-sized Spy.
  • Freeze-Frame Bonus: Multiple characters and objects appear on the background in the blink-and-you'll-miss-it moments, at times making sense, or just appearing completely at random. Such instances are Super Mushroom appearing when the Spy grows in size, multiple boxes of beer, a giant bottle of the stuff and the sign that says 'BEER' appear on the background when the team fires broadside batteries at Godzilla, and the landscape of the Hell appears when the Spy tells soon-to-be-vote-kicked Godzilla that he'll see him in Hell.
  • Fun with Subtitles: The subtitles frequently provide cheeky descriptions of what's going on on-screen when they're not transcribing actual voice lines.
  • Hyperactive Metabolism: Parodied. After being gunned down by Godzilla's shotgun, the Spy lies defeated, his body riddled with bullet holes, decrying that he had failed. But then Heavy arrives on a helicopter with a giant Sandvich, dropping it on Spy's bullet-ridden body, completely restoring the damage. The Spy doesn't even eat the Sandvich; it simply falls on his body and disappears, healing his body.
  • Kaiju: Godzilla, THE kaiju himself in his building-sized glory, shows up in Teufort, with the Spy and the BLU team trying to fight him for some reason. Later, the Spy grows to building size as well after snorting the crystal meth.
  • Look Behind You: During the Pummel Duel, the Spy distracts Godzilla by poking at behind his back and going "Ooooh!", prompting the giant monster to look away as he pulls out a boxing glove and punches him away.
  • Literal-Minded: When the Spy orders his team to "fire broadside BATTERIES!", the Soldier literally fills the cannons with giant batteries. As in, cell batteries. This earns them Godzilla's ridicule, much to Spy's frustration.
  • Mad Scientist: The Medic definitely looks the part, and would probably have to be one in order to create crystal meth that makes the user grow to the size of a building.
  • Make My Monster Grow: To combat Godzilla, the Spy grows to Kaiju sizes after snorting in the crystal meth.
  • Mundane Solution: Godzilla is ultimately defeated by being vote-kicked from the server.
  • No-Sell: As expected, Godzilla effortlessly tanks everything the Spy and his men throw at him, at least until the Spy grows to his size using crystal meth.
  • Oh, Crap!: Godzilla briefly reacts in terror when he sees the Spy has grown to his size, complete with wide eyes that shatter his sunglasses. Later, he panics and screams in terror when he's about to get vote-kicked from the server.
  • Pummel Duel: Once the Spy grows to Kaiju sizes and gets healed by Heavy's giant Sandvich, he rushes at Godzilla, and the two rapidly exchange blows.
  • Ramming Always Works: Subverted. The Spy orders the Engineer to attack Godzilla on a cart with a sword with "RAMMING SPEED!". Unfortunately, the cart was driving way too slowly, rendering the ramming ineffectual.
    Spy: *sigh* The cart is supposed to move quickly, you IDIOT!
    Engineer: DAMN! I'm tryin', God DAMMIT!
    [the cart harmlessly bumps into Godzilla's foot, failing to even scratch him]
    Spy: FUCK!
  • Rapid-Fire Comedy: As expected from a Team Fortress 2 machinima, the jokes in this video fire at rapid rate, one immediately springing up after another one not even a second later.
  • A Rare Sentence: After growing to Godzilla's size, the Spy loudly proclaims "I have harnessed the power of crystal METH!"
  • Ridiculously Fast Construction: Not even 20 seconds after Godzilla destroyed it with his atomic breath, a bunch of Engineers have already mostly rebuilt the bridge, albeit without the roof.
  • Screams Like a Little Girl: The Soldier starts screaming and crying like a baby when Spy calls him an imbecile. He even briefly gets a baby bib as he does it. It disappears and is replaced with his normal helmet the moment Spy apologizes.
  • Screw This, I'm Outta Here!: Within the first ten seconds of the video, the Scout bails as soon as the Spy prepares his team to fight Godzilla.
  • Shotguns Are Just Better: Godzilla draws a shotgun to retaliate against the Kaiju-sized Spy. He successfully blows lots of holes in his body and blows him across Teufort, but gets blown away as well (even though that doesn't harm him in the slightest).
  • Shout-Out: There's a lot of references in the video, most of them being Freeze-Frame Bonus:
  • Sore Loser: Godzilla burns the Kaiju-sized Spy with his atomic breath when Spy beats him at Rock, Paper, Scissors. Even the subtitles call him out on being one.
  • Skyward Scream: The Spy screams into the sky, combined with a Big "NO!", after the bridge is destroyed by Godzilla's Atomic Breath, complete with him cradling a piece of wood in his arms.
  • Suddenly Voiced: Godzilla actually speaks in this video. Twice. First time, he responds to Spy's declaration of hatred with a deep "Fuck you!" shortly before destroying the bridge with his Atomic Breath. Later, he calls kaiju-sized Spy "MOTHERFUCKER!" as he whips out a shotgun and shoots him.
  • Tennis Boss: Parodied. The Spy and Godzilla briefly play tennis with one of Godzilla's fireballs.
  • Unusually Uninteresting Sight: When the Spy is on the cart with the Engineer moving very slowly towards Godzilla, several other Engineers can be seen nearby, idly working and seeming to not notice that they're near a giant Kaiju.
  • Weird Crossover: A crossover between Team Fortress 2, a quirky cartoony First-Person Shooter with abundance of Black Comedy, and Godzilla, a classic giant monster movie franchise.
  • What the Hell, Hero?: As seen in Destructive Savior above, the Medic rants at the Spy for being stupid and destroying Teufort while fighting Godzilla.

 
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Video Example(s):

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"Fire broadside BATTERIES!"

The Spy orders the BLU team to fire at Godzilla from broadside batteries (as in, artillery batteries). The Soldier, however, misinterprets the order as "fire cell batteries from cannons", earning them Godzilla's ridicule, much to the Spy's frustration.

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Example of:

Main / LiteralMinded

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Main / LiteralMinded

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