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Machinima / Newbies

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Newbies was a popular Minecraft Machinima made by Youtuber Kuledud3. It features Joe and The Newbie as Joe tries to teach the Newbie how to play Minecraft, usually ending horribly. The series ended/went on hiatus back in 2014.


  • Black Comedy Rape: Johny, a character first introduced in the Nether video. according to the Newbie, he "only raped me twice."
  • Catch-Phrase: "CYYYYYYYAAAAAAAA!"
    • "Did somebody say moderator!?"
  • Creator Cameo
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  • Creepy House Keeper: The Moderator's butler in the Herobrine special part one is a male version of this, but not a Crusty Caretaker. This made much more sense when he turned out to not be a butler at all, and was actually Herobrine himself.
  • Freeze-Frame Bonus: In earlier episodes, Herobrine can be seen hiding in the background for presumably no reason.
  • Gay Moment: It's hard to explain why Joe would do this...
    Joe: Yes, fancy meeting you here, chap.
    Newbie: I do say, the weather is quite nice.
    Joe: (Runs up to Newbie as close as possible) I'd fuck you!
  • Metaphorgotten/JustLikeMakingLove:
    Kuledud 3: The first time I masturbated.
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  • Obligatory Swearing: On many occasions.
    Joe: Do you see this tree?
    Newbie: Yes.
    Joe: Do you see this beautiful, motherfucking tree?
  • Running Gag: In the Nether video, characters would be willing to do anything in exchange for a raw fish.
    Shop Keeper: That'll cost ya 26 iron for one set.
    Joe: Oh, and I need two... How about this raw fish?
    Shop Keeper: TAKE EVERYTHING!!!!
    • Whenever someone says moderator (and sometimes when they don't), The Moderator will teleport to them, or blow up a wall and fly in, and say, "Did somebody say Moderator?"
    • The Newbie is strangely able to obtain vast amounts of TNT for no adequately explained reason.
    • Whenever someone says "Pirate," several pirates will fall from the sky and swing their swords around rapidly while a very, very loud pirate song plays in the background.
  • Sir Swears-a-Lot: Every main character, especially Joe. The show is basically an F-Bomb minefield.
  • Small, Annoying Creature: "I'm a silverfish, BITCH!"
  • Vitriolic Best Buds: The Newbie and Joe seem to be great friends, but at the same time, they constantly insult and annoy each other.
    The Moderator: Where's your naked friend?
    Joe: Probably drowning in lava somewhere.
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Example of: