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Literature / The Brothers Crunk

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Written by William Pauley III and published by Grindhouse Press, the eponymous brothers Divey and Reynold Crunk are two traveling breakfast burrito salesmen who try to make a living in post-apocalyptic Planet Japan when they come across a mutilated robot corpse, and Divey falls unconscious. Reynold, who wants him back to normal, follows him with an un-dead pile of flesh (which is possibly implied to be really dead; maybe Pete’s voice coming from it is all in Rey’s head) and an ostrich. They end up in the dark underworld of Tokyo, which has old video game accessories that are used as weapons and no rules.


This work provides examples of:

  • High-Pressure Blood: Vega (green, tall, slender swordsman and mixed martial artist) decapitates five mooks in an elevator, covering its interior in blood.
  • Konami Code: Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, B, A
  • Purple Is Powerful: Vandenboom
  • Slow Transformation: Divey turns into Doon Vandenboom.
  • The Smart Guy: T-Dakk, who engineered, constructed, and perfected over thirty-eight different weapons, Krebb's KREBBOOM included.
  • Turned Against Their Masters: In a somewhat heroic example, Vandenboom and his Damned Dirt Devils defeat Dethbryte.
  • The Voiceless: When it comes to combat, Gluum would rather let her nebula fingers do most of her talking.
  • Vocal Dissonance: Jools Dethbryte, who's a space slug (Edokkolug, to be exact) that doesn't have any sex organs, referred to as a she but is rather an it, and speaks in a male voice.
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  • Your Head A-Splode: Pete dies like this in a way that's unintended and unexpected to the Brothers Crunk.