- Fitz: I'm gay as hell for dog dick.
The show constantly likes to turn established characters into deranged perverts, who get involved with such perversions as bestiality, incest, rape, adultery, sadomasochism, omnisexuality, pedophilia, necrophilia, and fat fetishism, which, although not parts of the LGBT community, commonly overlap with their gay jokes.
Welcome to Paradise
- Hopson tells the story of how he fingered Mickey Rooney way back when in 1941.
- Bullet admits to "plumping up" over Randall sprouting tits but says that he doesn't care about being gay because he's a dog.
Ass on the Line
- Hopson details how he "trained" famous boxers Joe Louis and Jack Dempsey, with Jack in his ass, while he was in Joe's ass.
- Randall's ridiculous obsession with asshole of a male murder victim's corpse. This involves him shoving his fists up the man's ass multiple times and looking into the anus to count all the freckles in there.Fitz: Careful, Chief. That stink-eye's gunna give you pinkeye.
- It turns out later that Hancock played the role of the murder victim for a long time, meaning most of these sexual acts were between him and Randall.
- A fan of Bullet the Badass admits to tittyfucking his gender-transitioning son.
Black & Blue
- Bullet gets high off his ass and fucks a bowling ball, dipping his nads in the waters of omnisexuality, himself.
- Randall changes Hopson's diaper and gets pissed on.
- Dusty excitedly looks at Hopson's dick and says it looks like Betty White with a dead snake in her mouth.
- Kevin gets into a sexual relationship with a car.
- Delbert says to Kevin that thanks to him becoming a famous autosexual icon, he came out to his father as a "Hondasexual".
- When Karla playfully tells Kevin that she "sees a handsome guy" (in reference to him), Kevin excitedly looks out the window and says that he wants to see him too.
Dungeons & Dragnet
- All of the moments with Preacher Paul's son.
- Kevin fucking a watermelon with a hole in it ... (and his dad's face drawn on the back).
- Fitz also spotted Randall fucking a watermelon, but Randall wants to make it very clear that it was just a honeydew as though that made things any better.
- The shocking and hilarious revelation that Preacher Paul, the homophobic Christian who forces his son to be straight, is not only gay, himself, but is in an open marriage with another man, who also tries to reprogram his son.
Meet the Jabowskis
- Robby sucks a guy off for crack.
- Bullet and Fitz needing to pretend they're a gay couple to stay under the radar of the cops. Especially given how Bullet was the one who came up with the idea and he was really quick to jump on the opportunity of being Fitz's husband when there's a million other lies he could have told. In fact, he didn't even need to lie. He could have just said that he and Fitz needed a motel for the night but nope. He went with the gay story.
- Bullet and Fitz getting into a violent fight on the motel bed and saying things that sounded rather sexual out of context.Fitz: Oh, I'm gunna fuck your ass up!Bullet: How would you like to get choked by something furry!?
- Randall kissing Hopson's dick ... twice.
- Robby and Delbert trick Kevin into jerking the latter off and later dressing like a hula girl and dancing for them.
- Joe Biden is revealed to be a perverted stalker, who is obsessed with Dusty.
- Mr. Meowgi ends up buying Dusty's virginity on the dark web and preparing for extreme BSDM with him.
- Kevin talks to a comatose Fitz and notices his boner and takes this as a sign that he can hear him.
- While comatose, Fitz has a wet dream about Shelley Long but because Kevin keeps talking to him, his likeness is incorporated into the dream, with a bunch of tiny faces of his replacing Long's genitals. Fitz decided, fuck it. I'm still going for it, only to find out that his dick has also been replaced by a Kevin head.Kevin: Hi, Fitz!Fitz: Aaah! God dammit!
- Kevin gets humped by Randall and Karen.
- Kevin is forced to fuck a dolphin but refuses. When he does, he gives us this callback-filled monologue, wherein he basically admits to his omnisexuality.
Christmas in Paradise
- This episode included an extremely disturbing scene of Kevin trying to grab his father's tits and feel them.
- Randall, with his tits out, working as a stripper named "Summer Sausage".
- We also find out that later, he and Hopson had a fling that night, although it's most likely Randall was only intimate with Hopson because he was getting paid.
- Hopson offers Kevin a handjob but Kevin declines because "once was enough".
- Hopson goes in drag as a girl named "Hopsaletta" and seduces a bunch of male prison guards.
- A gorilla rapes Zookeeper Dave in the ass.
Big Ball Energy
- Randall gets aroused, thinking about Fitz getting back into action.Randall: Oh, Fitz, I'm hard-I mean, NOT hard. *phew* Nice save, Chief.
- Hopson shoves a balldonote up his ass.
- Dr. Funtlichter has a bunch of celebrity balldos of his own. Balldos that resemble the testicles of famous celebrities. Sometimes he combines the balls of Ice-T and Don Lemon to make the Arnold Ballmer.
- Kevin publicly jerks off in front of a bunch of monkeys at the zoo.
Tucker Carlson is a Huge Dick
- Pat Robertson blurts out something fucking crazy that pretty much reveals straight away that he's an armored closet homosexual with a fetish for mammary intercourse.Frank: What do you think the "D.D." in "Operation: D.D." stands for?Pat: I hope it stands for "Operation: Double-D", so we can all get implants and then tittyfuck each other ...Pat: ... is what the devil would say.
- Kevin calls out Randall on his faggotry when he hugs him.
- When Gal-Qaeda traps Fitz and Thester, they tell them to eat chicken wings and then jerk off so the toxic grease will dissolve their dicks. Thester thinks this plan is overcomplicated and just thinks they can cut out the middle man by having them dump the toxic chemicals right on their dicks. Or better yet, rub the chemicals on their mouths so they can suck each other off.
- Fitz chokes Tucker Carlson's big dick body and makes him cum.
Who Ate Wally's Waffles?
- Delbert plays funion ring toss with Robby and Tom Hanks. (a variant of ring toss, where one player throws funion rings at the other player's erect penis and tries to catch it).
The Father, The Son, and The Holy Post-It Note
- Fitz needs a plan on how they can distract the Catholic priest and steal his money and Frank suggests they send in Jerry dressed as an altar boy. Fitz thinks this idea would never work given that Jerry is so ugly, the priest would never love him and Frank lashes out at him, saying that his son is very molestable, as he slaps his son's ass to show Fitz how tight it is.
- In another armored closet gay gag, Pat Robertson reveals that he secretly has a crush on Jesus Christ.Jesus: I only promise to help you if you stop being a homophobic asshole.Pat: How could I be a homophobe? I jerk off to pictures of Jesus.Jesus: W-What!?Pat: Uh, nothing. Nothing. I mean ... [blushes] Hi.
- After The Legion of Dooooom gets their stolen money back, Fitz thanks Jerry by kissing him all over. Frank laughs at this and considers this Fitz admitting that Jerry was, in fact, molestable after all.
Flip the Vote
- Hopson teabags the corpses of Dusty and Bullet, while they were dead.
Paradise P.D. Meets Brickleberry
- Woody briefly admits to being sexually aroused by Tom Selleck.
- Connie gives Ethel a "Do You Love Me? Yes or No" paper, asking her to "lick her box".
- Connie instantly falls in love with Gina as soon as she meets her.Connie: Does anyone need wifi? Cuz I'm making a hotspot.
- Hopson hits on Denzel.Hopson: I like my men like I like my coffee: Hot, black, and up the ass.
- Connie takes pictures of Ethel and Gina wrestling until her camera runs out of film. Connie then powers up her dildo.
- Hopson tricks Denzel and Bullet into having a three-way with him.
- Connie dressing up as Dusty so she can trick the single-target sexuality Gina into fucking her.
- Hopson prepares the "enter" Fitz using many of his various dildos.
- Agent Clappers has Randall shove his hand down his pants and feel his balls to gain his trust.
- Hopson then asks Clappers to gain the trust of his tonsils.