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Headscratchers / Bad Lip Reading

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  • Why is Zazoom always around so many graves? (Considering Michael Bublé poisoned his dog to save a baby giraffe...)
    • So he can leave his scent on them, of course.
  • Is Bruno Mars the prettiest at the store?
    • Do you want to tell a guy with a posse of people wearing monkey masks that he isn't the prettiest?
  • Why would it not be good if Madonna married a real giant?
    • Because never mind.
  • Why shouldn't you ever feed a sick child thick toast?
    • You never make a sick child thick toast. They can eat it, they just need to make their own.
    • Also, something as dense as thick toast may not agree with a sick child. Better safe than sorry.
  • Why shouldn't you freak if your Xbox ain't a payphone?
    • Who buys an Xbox expecting it to be a payphone? Frankly, anyone who does deserves to be disappointed.
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  • Why would Madonna gobble that sardine if she had a wooden statue?
  • Why is a dark threat in the oasis giving Miley Cyrus encouragement? And why the hell is it calling her "Shorty"?
    • Considering how her career has gone, it was probably cheering on the Start of Darkness.
  • Why would The '70s being "gone, baby" be hard for anyone who likes gummy bears?
    • Because they weren't made outside of Germany, their place of creation, until 1981. Now it's hard to tell authentic quality ones from the shoddy cheap-o ones. Which country makes better ones is a HUGE point of contention.
  • Why can't long-legged women tell there's a blue-eyed Hobbit?
    • Long-legged women are tall. Hobbits are short. If a long-legged woman isn't looking down, she might not notice a Hobbit standing right in front of her.
  • Is Eddie a fan of the Pikachu?
    • Who isn't?
  • And why doesn't Mitt Romney like twin ducks or baby ducks, or those little terriers that everybody likes, and why does that make him a loser?
    • He doesn't want twin ducks or baby ducks. That doesn't mean he dislikes them, it might just be he doesn't see the point in personally owning one.
    • If they're "little terriers that everybody likes", then obviously Mitt Romney does like them...
  • Do you have an orange peanut?
  • Who hides dumb tube socks?
    • Old Viking dudes.
  • Is he or is he not Joe?
    • He's CODFISH JOE!!
  • So... does giving someone a good time (...kissing them) cause babies to grow?
  • If they're not diamonds on Jacob's thong, what are they exactly? They do decorate everything good...
  • Who wants to see Jay-Z give a rock to a fish?
  • Is this Idaho? (Because I will not limbo in Idaho.)
  • Can Martin O'Malley help Hillary Clinton?
    • That depends. What's his skill set and how does it relate to Hillary's problems?
  • Should Anderson get a scooter?
  • What do Bernie Sanders' knuckles mean, and how does it relate to his heart being explosive?
  • Has Rebecca Black brought this chicken for us to eat?
    • Likely not, considering she also wants to know if she's brought this chicken for us to thaw. We've got to thaw it before we can eat it.
  • How is Rebecca Black going to show that cowboy she's alive?
    • Just telling him would probably work.
  • Is Gotye glad he keyed that van?
    • Since it'll make him fly when Kimbra's rubbing that thing, probably, unless he does something creepy. Speaking of which...
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  • Why is it creepy to juggle in bed, when God gave us hands, and God gave us balls, and God gave us beds?
  • Who really thinks Gotye has a Waldo sack?
  • Who do you think would win in a bear fight in the night?
    • If the WMG that "Beard With Glue" is a revenge story in Anachronic Order is true, it could be taken as a threat; i. e. Blunt is asking if you think you could survive if he were to attack you with a bear.
  • Who is gonna hoard dark water for days?
  • Does Nick Minaj hate Gumby more than she hates me, or does she hate Gumby more than I do?
  • Do you think they should make iPhones for babies? (Cuz I do!)
  • Do you trust toothpaste?
  • Why are dormant wives adorable?
  • Why are wooorms on me?
  • Does Tommy from Radical Paintball have more science than Hickory Nick?
    • It depends on if you trust Dr. Rat Cheek's judgment.
  • Hey, remember that time when Bill Clinton was President?
    • How could we not?
  • Who is this? And who is that chump? And what's that?


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