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In General

  • Kenzie's interaction with the technology her tinker power lets her create. More often than not, the final step to activating one of her contraptions is to kick or smack it. And the more she describes her tech, the scarier it sounds, until at the last second she assures everyone it's harmless. For example, this scene from Glare 3.5:
    Kenzie: Whatever you do, do not put the battery pack in backward, when you re-insert it.
    Victoria: Why?
    Kenzie: Because then it won't work.

Shade

  • Ashley's brilliant line from Shade 4.2: "It was fine. I read a book. A baby cried after looking at me and I was amused.”
  • Rain's comment in Shade 4.a about how the Fallen "attacked" Brockton Bay, and how he fears Victoria might feel about that, becomes hilarious once you remember how badly Skitter destroyed said Fallen when they showed up in Brockton Bay.
  • The Kings of the Hill try to pull the 'just passing through' line on the villains of Hollow Point, only for Prancer to exasperatedly point out that they can't pass through, because Hollow Point is a peninsula, so there's nowhere to pass through to.
  • "Ashley likes dresses," Sveta said. "We’ve had conversations about it. She thinks I should wear some, and I’ve had to repeatedly reinforce that I don't have the legs for it, because I don’t have legs."

Shadow

  • Mad Anxiety Chris versus Love Lost in Shadow 5.3 consists of the two of them standing there screaming at each other until they give up.
  • Spright chasing Mad Anxiety Chris around so he could copy his powers, complete with shouting "Give!" at him (while Chris is still screaming).
  • Everything about Moose and Victoria interacting/flirting in Shadow 5.5. Victoria's narration even says that she doesn't want to attack him because it'd make his mother cry more than necessary.
  • Etna accidentally knocks out the projection device Looksee was using to make it look like she was actually on the battlefield. Looksee responds with some of the most hilarious overacting seen in either Worm or Ward.
    "Aauuughhh!" Looksee cried out, in a not-very-convincing agonized scream. "I'm dying, I’m dead! Auughh!" [...] "Mayday, I loved you, you were awesome. Signal Fire, you were a great teacher. Team, you’re the best, I love you with all my heart! Remember me, avenge me!"
  • In Shadow 5.6, we find out that Victoria tends to list people in her phone under some... eccentric names: Crystal is "Best Cousin", Ashley is "Dark Damsel", Tristan is "the Goat", and Chris is "Creepy Kid".
  • In Shadow 5.7, we find out that despite all the hardships and resource scarcity that humanity's dealing with... someone still managed to build a giant cow.
  • In Shadow 5.10, Sidepiece, whose power lets her rip out chunks of herself and explode them like grenades, taunts the Fallen by yelling "You wanna piece of me!?". Disjoint comments “You’ve got to stop saying that”, implying this isn't the first time she's done this.
    • In Shadow 5.11, Sidepiece says that she has a Bingo sheet of parts of her body she has to hit people with.
  • Chris' blasé reaction to Mama Mathers' hallucinations in Pitch 6.3:
    "Seeing the the surface of everything peeling away to show the shrieking flesh beneath distracts me. Sue me."
  • Victoria's description of Vista's problem, also in Pitch 6.3:
    "You have a problem,” I told her, quiet. “You have a thing for unattainable guys in heavy armor."
    • Vista's reaction to Victoria is even better:
    “Dead son of a cunt, I might actually,” she said, under her breath. “Unattainable why?”

Pitch

  • The meeting between the team and the Undersiders in Pitch 6.8 has a lot of humorous moments.
    • Everything about the debate over Chicken Little's codename, particularly this bit:
      Imp: I was pushing for Unkindness. It went over everybody's heads.
      Victoria: Then it's not a good cape name. It's going over my head.
      Imp: High bar.
      Victoria: I was a pretty good student, actually.
      Imp: Were you, though? I was a terrible student and I got it.
      Ashley: An unkindness of ravens.
      Imp: Thank you!
      Ashley: It's not very good.
      Imp: Ugh!
    • Kenzie and Chris both agreeing that it's not a good idea to let a pre-teen decide their own codename.
    • Tattletale is in full Deadpan Snarker mode throughout the chapter, even when she's not actually saying anything.
      "Please," Parian said.
      “Please,” I said, echoing Parian’s word, but in my brightest, nicest tone of voice. I smiled at Tattletale.
      Tattletale fixed me with her best ‘are you serious’ look.
    • The rest of the Undersiders, particularly Rachel and Parian, repeatedly undercutting Tattletale's attempts at making an argument:
      Tattletale: Damsel of Distress had an invite to the Slaughterhouse Nine.
      Rachel: So did I.
      Tattletale: Shh.

Torch

  • In Torch 7.3, Tristan tries to drive a van with Chris making bitchy comments from the backseat, including the following:
    Chris: Isn’t it a rule that every self respecting teenager has to be in line to get their license the moment the DMV opens on their sixteenth birthday?
    Tristan: The DMV wasn’t open the day I turned sixteen, on account of the world having ended the year before.
    Chris: Excuses.
    Sveta: I didn’t get my license when I turned sixteen, but I don’t have hands, feet, or a definitive birthday.
    Chris: Excuses.

Eclipse

  • During Eclipse x.5, a scientist asks Ashley if she's started any new medications. Ashley tells him no, but adds that he should ask her personal doctor for a more precise answer. It's a standard response... except that Ashley's personal doctor is Riley, the parahuman formerly known as Bonesaw.
  • From Eclipse x.8:
    Ashley: If you want mayhem, I’ll give you mayhem. It’s something I’m good at. If you want violence, I can give you violence. I’ve taken a boy’s arms and legs and I watched him bleed out. Name a target and I can do that. I’ve killed.
    Jack Slash: I don’t want mayhem. I don’t want violence. I don’t want killing.
    Bonesaw: Oh, shoot! We’ve reaaaaaaally been messing up, then.

Beacon

  • While in prison, Ashley meets another Damsel clone, and the two of them quickly milk the clone jokes for all they're worth.
    • Beacon 8.3:
    "My roommate is fine. Exceptionally beautiful and graceful. Good genes, I think. Clever. Quick to learn. Witty, even."
    • Beacon 8.4:
    Damsel: Did you worry, when I had my claws so close? Did you fear me?
    Ashley: I trust you as far as I trust myself.
    Chris: So corny. I can imagine them just doing that nonstop for the next two years, and acting like it’s still cute or funny.
  • In Beacon 8.6, Chris unleashes a new form, best described as a giant caterpillar with a human face packed full of some kind of humanoid creatures that he can 'unload'. Rain reacting to this by noping the fuck out and turning his projector off is funny, Victoria having to tell Chris not to give birth to whatever the creatures are is funnier.
    Tristan: Great. Chris? Take it easy, we’ll have you running errands later. And if you have to go, find a discreet place in nature to do it. I don’t want you destroying our toilet by filling it with tiny bones or whatever.
    Chris: I can feel the love.
    Tristan: I like you fine. I like our security deposit too.
    Ashley: Everyone has their tasks.
    Chris: Mine’s apparently to not shit in the toilet.
    • Sveta surprisingly gets a good line in during the same chapter.
    Rain: I wish I had a better idea of what my body was doing.
  • Sveta says that Tristan complimenting her by saying she has a pretty face is nice, and Tristan interrupts her to say 'No hetero'.

Gleaming

  • Finale of the Major Malfunctions is a Blaster who, when she blasts people with her balls of distorted air, shouts sound effects to go with it.
    “Bam, blast, zap, bam, bam and fuck you!”
    I could hear Finale.
  • Kenzie in Gleaming 9.12 is revealed to be a fan of the Maggie Holt book series, Pact's equivalent in the Wormverse. Even funnier, the person she's geeking out about how good the series is is Damsel of Distress. Not Swansong, Damsel. There's something inherently funny in what's either a dedicated member of the Slaughterhouse 9 gushing about a children's book series or Kenzie talking about a series meant for an older demographic.
    • Even funnier, they mention that as the Maggie Holt series, meaning Blake isn't even the main character in it. Funnier still is that they mention it in the context of the Toronto section where she meets Conquest, when in Pact she wasn't even actually there.
  • In Gleaming 9.13, we get this moment in an otherwise tense scene:
    Voices overlapped. “That itty bitty thing isn’t going to-” “That’s a tas-”
    From what I could gather, Blindside had realized their stun gun didn’t work on Capricorn and applied it to Rain instead.

Polarize

  • Victoria's complaints of unfairness to the news that Ashley and Damsel were relaxing in the warmth of their own home, wrapped in blankets and treating themselves to cups of cider, while using Kenzie's projections to participate in the shopping trip while everyone else who were actually present suffered in the freezing cold.
  • Victoria apparently ships Rain and Erin.
    Inch over half a foot, Rain, and put your arm around her, I thought. Warm her up.
  • Rain somehow forgetting that Ashley can't contaminate evidence just by touching it because of his prosthetics she's wearing? Funny. Ashley smugging oh-so very hard about the fact that she can manipulate small objects so well that the creator of the prosthetics forgets? Priceless.
  • In Polarize 10.12, we find out that Ashley takes tea very seriously, to the point of having gone on a rant because her clone pierced the teabag in her cup and gave her cup to Ashley.
  • What did Aiden, a.k.a. Chicken Little name the giant eagle that he received as a late birthday present? Chicken Large.
    • Even better, Imp threatened to kick Aiden off the team if he called it that, so he just does it in his head.

Blinding

  • While the chapter as a whole is definitely not funny, there is something darkly hilarious about Tristan's reaction to the truth about Chris:
    “He’s thirteen,” Tristan stated, voice firm, like he could say it with enough authority to make it so. Then, in a one-eighty in every respect, he said, “He’s not thirteen.”
  • Chastity, who has a body-sensing power, likes Rain's "proportions".
  • Victoria's frustration with Rain's inability to stop talking about his love life to people called the "Heartbroken".
    • Victoria assumes this is due to a power one of them has. When talking to Foil about it, the latter initially confirms it, but then immediately says that the "power" is Chastity's prettiness.
  • Lord of Loss types like a teenage anime fan, even when doing professional emails.
    I am happy to do this level of work because I trust you. A job done is reputation. \ ._. /
    Get the job done get the pay build rapport. (E >_<)E ~(L o L ~)
    My thinker has a good feeling about this :->D
    • And a couple of chapters later...
    Victoria: The way this is going we’ll have to surrender or get captured, and we’ll have to deal with a woman who will probably impregnate us as an alternative to handcuffs and a guy who’s so unreasonable he thinks smileys should be appended to every sentence in an email. Not even good ones.
  • The Heartbroken are really excited when finding bags of drugs in Love Lost's hideout. Before Victoria can object, Parian simply tells her to not take the bait.
  • Everything that any of the three Heartbroken in Vicky's team do or say can be a source of this or Black Comedy. From the fact that Chastity can't stop flirting and propositioning to Rain even when they about to fight the incoming enemies, to Candy making Vicky believe she has a 'lie sense' and making her confess the highly uncomfortable mechanics of Nursery power. And the fact that Aroa apparently laughs when babies and old people are hurt and can't stop for one second to sarcastically put down everyone around her, with Rain being her favourite target.

Heavens

  • In Heavens 12.1 Victoria takes out her frustrations with her mother by punting her mom's invulnerable ball-form as hard as she can, assisted by her forcefield, into a group of enemies.
    Victoria: With a bit of Wretch strength, I hurled the sphere. It crashed into the two guys on guard duty, I landed, and I kicked it, channeling about seven years of active frustration with the maternal unit into the kick.
  • One of the mercenaries guarding Cradle's stronghold in Heavens 12.6 takes it upon himself to learn dirty words in Chinese from another mercenary, all while Victoria and Rain are secretly hiding nearby and listening to the whole conversation. Bilingual Bonus: Turns out the literal translations for some of the curses have something to do with eggs.

Black

  • In Black 13.4 Tattletale reveals that Chicken Little, Kenzie, and Darlene have decided to name their new junior cape team the Chicken Tenders.
  • Black 13.5's interactions between Chicken Little, Tattletale, Antares, and Snuff are just a constant source of hilarity.
    • Victoria is initially confused why Tattletale needs a booster seat for their van, before she remembers that Chicken Little is still a kid.
    • The negotiations between the Tattletale/Antares teamup and the Chicken Tenders. Turns out Darlene drives a hard bargain, Kenzie also plays hardball but only because that's what Antares told her to do, and Chicken Little is willing to knock $300 off their asking price if Tattletale brings BBQ home when she gets back. Victoria encourages the kids to not sell their services for cheap (even when she's the one buying) while Tattletale just rolls her eyes over and over again.
    • Victoria and Lisa snark back and forth so much that even Vicky realizes that they sound like a divorced couple sharing custody of their kids.
    • Snuff stays out of the conversation until he's mentioned by one of the others, but then slyly starts stirring the pot.
    • Anelace asks Victoria out again and is again shot down. Lisa then starts teasing Victoria about Anelace's proposition... and then Aiden of all people basically tells Victoria that Anelace is an edgelord and that she's too good for him.
  • In Black 13.10, while Tattletale's on the phone to Imp:
    Tattletale: Fine. But- let me talk. Let me- fine, I’m a cunt, just-
    Victoria and Sveta: *slow, exaggerated nodding in unison*
    Tattletale: *flips them off*
    • There's also the fact that one of Parian's hangouts is a combination tea shop/BDSM club called Miss Treats.

From Within

  • Golem asks Team Breakthrough about their impressions of Contessa.
    Sveta: My impression is she's awful and fuck her, but I'm biased.
    Golem: Understandable.
    Victoria: My impression is she's awful and fuck her. I'm less biased.

Radiation

  • Torso. A parahuman with a massively enlarged torso but ordinary limbs. Has a really hard time keeping balance and pretty much every scene he's in involves him tripping and falling over like a total klutz. His power seems to involve just... ramming into things really hard. Granted, we soon see that he hits like Superman on steroids when he connects, but the mental image of him in action is just comical.

Infrared

  • Literally every Tinker that sees Victoria’s gun either starts admiring the fact that Dragon made it or starts chastising her for showing precisely zero care for its upkeep. The fact that even Chris calls her out on it suggests that ruining something Dragon makes is akin to spitting in a bible for any self-respecting Tinker.
    Teenage Tinker: If Dragon gave me something like that, I wouldn’t even be here. I’d run off to some lost corner of the world and run my face up and down the housing. I’d open it up in a hermetic environment and stare lovingly at the layout.

Last

  • Everyone discussing a new name for Kid Win (Christopher) because he's not a kid anymore:
    Christopher: I had ideas. Clockblocker is trying to convince me of "Winman".
    Victoria: No.
    Clockblocker: It works. Like a wingman, but without the 'g'.
    Damsel: That makes no sense.
    [later]
    Clockblocker: Winman and I, we've got gaps.
    Victoria: Please, do not use Winman.
    [Clockblocker just snorted]

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    Other Content 
  • This rendition of the Love Lost/Mad Anxiety Chris fight from Shadow 5.3, from Reddit:
    Chris: I'M REALLY FUCKING ANXIOUS RIGHT NOW "AAAAAAAAA"
    Love Lost: *Makes him feel rage, hatred, bloodlust* "AAAAAAAAAAAA"
    Chris: THOSE EMOTIONS ONLY MAKE ME WAY MORE FUCKING ANXIOUS "ÁÃÅÀÂÄÁÃÅÀÂÄÁÃÅÀÂÄ"
  • Lord of Loss as a Homestuck character.
  • During the Eclipse arc, the fans had a spreadsheet going of the many terrible fates that might happen to J.
  • After the events of Blinding 11.6, a couple of fans expressed a wish for the next chapter to just be a nice shopping trip with no fights, action or attempted orifice invasion by fetus monsters. Wildbow then showed up to ruin that idea.
  • Ward: she gonna punch you in the dick
  • In a way, the fandom's Browbeat memes becoming so annoying that Wildbow retroactively killed him off is pretty funny.
  • In Black 13.10, the character Engel (German for 'angel') makes her first appearance. Cue this comment from Reddit:
    I'm just gonna assume Engel is named as she is because of the visceral feeling of contentment that comes from seizing the means of production and establishing a socialist utopia.
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