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Funny / Toy Story 3

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  • The entire opening sequence. Seriously. It's just so hilariously overblown and epic that words don't do it justice. It gets even better when you realized the whole damn thing is just Andy's playtime in the eyes of the toys.
    • When Woody shouts, "The orphans!!!" and then it cuts to a bunch of troll dolls, apparently standing in for orphans.
    • Hamm saying, "That's MISTER evil Dr. Porkchop to you!"
    • Mr. Potato Head looking over his money bags, doing an Evil Laugh, and saying, "Money, money, money!"
    • Woody says, "Oh yeah? Well, I brought my attack dog! With a built-in force field!" and brings out Slink, who bites his tail and creates a force field. Jessie responds, "Well, I brought my DINOSAUR! Who EATS FORCE FIELD DOGS!", and summons a giant Rex.
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    • The Big Red Button labeled "DEATH BY MONKEYS." And the resulting explosion.
    • The best part is that the entire scene is one long Call-Back to the opening scenes in the first and second movies.
  • The look on Buzz's face when Woody's trying to calm the toys down pre-packing.
  • The line that seemed to get the most laughs in the theater comes right after Molly throws Barbie in the donation box:
    Jessie: Poor Barbie!
    Hamm: I get the Corvette.
    • Even better, this is actually a Brick Joke for all the way back to the first movie when the toys are ganging up on Woody for knocking Buzz out the window and Hamm calls dibs on Woody's hat.
  • Think about the scene where Ms. Davis asks if Andy wants to donate his toys or sell them online, and he responds by saying no one will want them because they're 'junk'. He's saying this about 'all' of the toys...including Woody, Jessie, and Bullseye, who have been established as being rare and valuable enough that a Japanese toy museum wanted to get their hands on them (albeit a complete set with Stinky Pete). Andy can easily be forgiven for not knowing their value as a kid, but there's something amusing about the fact that even a decade later, he still doesn't realize that he has three extremely valuable toys that could make him quite the cash (though it's a good thing that he didn't sell them and separate them from the rest of the gang). Al would've chewed Andy out for saying such words.
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  • When Andy's Mom takes the rest of the gang towards the curb thinking they're garbage, Woody whistles for Buster like he did in the previous film. Except this time, Buster is a very old dog and just falls asleep when he enters the room—right on top of Woody!
  • This bit...
    Mr. Potato Head: Andy doesn't want us anymore.
    Woody: He was putting you IN THE ATTIC!
  • Woody's description of daycare.
    Woody: Daycare is a sad, lonely place for washed up old toys who have no owners.
    [Beat. Barbie starts crying]
    Hamm: Quite the charmer, aren't you?
  • As Lotso leads the toys through the bathroom, Mr. Potato Head slips on a puddle and breaks!
    Lotso: Oh, watch out for puddles.
  • This scene after realizing how literal the following line is.
    Ken: It's almost like we were...
    Ken and Barbie: Made for each other.
  • Rex excitedly placing himself right in front of the door in the Caterpillar room, only to be knocked away when the toddlers storm in.
    Rex: At last! I'm gonna get played with! Come to papa!(WHAM!)
    • Same scene, same moment. Buzz notices the more experienced toys taking cover when the kids are about to enter the room. He gets the hint and tries to warn Rex, but to no avail. What sells it is when he breaks the "don't move when they can see you" rule and flips on his helmet when the kids are about to grab him. Even frozen, you can see him thinking, "This Is Gonna Suck".
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  • Woody introducing himself to Dolly. It's the delivery of the line that nails it:
    Woody: The name's Woody.
    Dolly: Woody, huh? You're gonna stick with that? [...] Of course, you're getting this from a doll named Dolly.
  • Mr. Pricklepants: "Well, EXCUSE me, I'm trying to stay in character!"
    • Immediately after this, he takes a deep breath in classic "slightly pretentious actor getting into character by pretending to be a tree" style... and then immediately snaps into his frozen toy mode, which is just him as a happily smiling stuffed porcupine.
    • Followed by him and Trixie getting into a 'shush' fight, that leads to Buttercup calling Mr. Pricklepants "Baron von Shush".
    • And then the line of him asking Woody if he's "classically trained."
  • The look on Woody's face when Trixie tries to tell him where they are.
  • Pretty much everything said by Bonnie during her playtime is a combination of this and Heartwarming Moments:
    • "The ghosts are throwing pies!", "I have the secret ingredient-Jellybeans!", "We need a spaceship to get away from the witch!" (the latter is funny since she uses a scribbled-on cardboard box for the spaceship, and uses Dolly, who was established as very amicable, as a witch).
    • When Woody says, "SOMEBODY'S POISONED THE WATERHOLE!", she replies, "Poison?!" and spits out a jellybean as though she thought it was true and the jellybeans had been washed in the contaminated water.
    • This shot, after Bonnie's had a little too much pretend coffee.
    • And on that note, after Bonnie goes away Woody tries to find out where he is, only for the other toys to take a few seconds to remember what kind of bizarre scenario they're part of this time.
      Trixie: [excited] I'm pretty sure I just came back from the doctors with life-changing news!
    • Buttercup's line "We do a lot of improv here.", as though they were actors.
  • This exchange when Woody first meets Bonnie's toys:
    Woody: Look, I just need to know how to get out of here.
    Buttercup: [melodramatically] There is no way out! [Woody gasps] Just kidding, door's right over there.
  • When Buzz is trying to sneak around, he sees Ken and Barbie giggling and playing a game where they alternate who says each word of "I love you." The look of disgust on Buzz's face is priceless!
  • The bad toys using a See & Say for gambling purposes. That's just funny.
  • What about this line?
    Woody: I got to get home to my owner. (Shows him his ANDY boot upside-down)
    Trixie: Who's Yidna?
    Mr. Pricklepants: I think it's pronounced Yid-nay.
  • The way that Lotso condescendingly calls Ken "Kenneth".
  • "Just a dinosaur". The context, coupled with Kristen Schall's voice acting, which managed to make the line sound simultaneously apologetic and dismissive, never fails to please. And if you look at Trixie after she says that, her eyes shift back to Woody for just a moment, while Mr. Pricklepants (and Dolly when the message first comes up) is giving her a Disapproving Look. It's subtle, but it'll get you.
  • Mr. Pricklepants explaining that Lotso is evil. He hammily says, "Sunnyside is a place of ruin and despair, ruled by an evil bear who smells of STRAWBERRIES."
  • Chuckles. You'd expect with a name like that that he'd be smiling, but then the camera cuts to reveal his face to us and he's frowning. Made even funnier by him having an unexpectedly gruff tone of voice and intense delivery that seems very out of place for a toy clown.
  • Despite being sort of scary and weird, brainwashed Buzz has some really funny quotes.
    • "Quiet, musical hog!" (after Hamm plays the harmonica in "prison")
    • "Hey, you can't hit each other! That's my job!" (witnessing Rex and Hamm's fake fight)
  • Though the Cymbal-Banging Monkey was Nightmare Fuel for some, it's hard to hold back laughter at the Chatter Telephone's speech to Woody. There's something hilarious about a dramatic briefing with the word "monkey" in it.
    Woody: That's it? Doesn't seem so bad...
    Chatter Telephone: It's not. Your real problem's the monkey.
    • Plus, that part - and the part where Woody and his pals are escaping - just screams Ocean's Eleven and/or (for older audiences) The Great Escape.
    • After being thoroughly creeped out by that monkey, seeing him in star-shaped sunglasses during the end credits will produce a smile.
  • When Jessie admits to Woody he was right about Andy not throwing them away:
    Jessie: Woody, we were wrong to leave Andy. I-I was wrong.
    Mr. Potato Head: Jessie's right, Woody. She was wrong!
  • Most things involving Ken. The best is probably Demo Buzz's reply of "Yes sir, Well Groomed Man!" The Brazilian dubbing makes that even funnier ("Affirmative, plastic metrosexual!").
  • Mr. Potato Head gives a real stinger of an insult to Ken as he creates a diversion for the escape plan.
    Mr. Potato Head: You ascot-wearing pink noser! You're not a toy! You're an accessory! You're a purse with legs!
  • Hamm and Rex's trying to fight with each other during the prison breakout sequence, but due to their short arms, they just end up slap-fighting!
  • In order to help the other toys escape, Barbie tricks Ken into breaking her out of "jail," then modeling his clothes. She eventually ties him up to get information from Ken. She does this by....ripping his clothes.
    Barbie: Ooh, a Nehru jacket...
    Ken: [horrified gasp] Barbie, not the Nehru!
    • This is more hilarious when you realize that the "Nehru Jacket" doesn't actually exist; the commentary reveals that the crew made it up when they discovered that the real rarest Ken outfit was something totally mundane—in fact, it was apparently so boring that they don't even bother to reveal what it actually is.
    • She ties him up to a paddleball paddle. It blatantly sticks out while everything else in the dollhouse is perfectly proportioned and otherwise normal-looking.
    • Heck, just Ken modeling his clothes in the first place is entertaining in itself. Especially with "Le Freak" by Chic playing in the background.
  • When Barbie goes to retrieve the manual, she's wearing Ken's space suit, but forgot to remove her pink high heels. The Bookworm takes one look at the heels and goes, "Yeesh!"
  • Any scene involving "Mr. Tortilla Head". Especially the pigeon. Something about the way "Mr. Tortilla Head" just falls apart. Just the way "Mr. Tortilla Head" flops around is silly and hilarious. Or "Mr. Cucumber Head".
    Mr. Potato Head: You will not believe what I've been through tonight.
  • Pretty much any scene with Spanish Buzz. Why? So far, we've seen at least 3 different multiple Buzz personalities already (Space Ranger, Enlightened, and Mrs. Nesbit). Yet Pixar has somehow managed to take the idea of the Deluded Space Ranger up to eleven because now he's a Spanish Deluded Space Ranger. It's all the better if you've ever seen Spanish soap operas. The longer lines he says are as cheesy as the lines can get in an actual Spanish soap opera. The voice actor's over the top delivery of the lines is the clincher, though.
    • When he angrily shouts, "¡El Vaquero!" (The Cowboy!)
    • "¡Abierto!"
    • Even better in the European Spanish version, where he speaks with a marked Andalusian accent; and the Latin American Spanish version, where he speaks with an actual European Spanish accent.
    • Jessie's reaction to Spanish Buzz Lightyear.
      Jessie: Did you fix Buzz?
      Hamm: Eh... sort of.
    • And for that matter, Woody's reaction to Spanish Buzz Lightyear kissing him twice on the cheeks.
      Woody: [Beat] We've gotta switch him back.
      Slinky: How do we do that?
      Hamm: (Looking through the instructions) I don't know, that part's in Spanish!
    • Or to Jessie:
      Buzz: [to Jessie] Venga conmigo, señorita. Le enseñaré las maravillas de la galaxia y juntos con nuestro amor venceremos al mal.Translation: 
    • Not to mention the flamenco that comes just before it. Just try not to crack up when El Buzzo pulls that crazy-crab-walk-windmill move. You will fail.
  • Barbie: Authority should derive from the consent of the governed, not from the threat of force!
  • The LGMs rescuing the other toys from the incinerator is mostly a Moment of Awesome, but the sheer Mood Whiplash it entails can be pretty amusing, as the scene instantly shifts from the one of the darkest moments in Pixar history to a punchline fifteen years in the making:
  • Lotso's Fate Worse than Death at the end. He gets taped to the front of a garbage truck.
    "Hey buddy, you might want to keep your mouth shut."
    • It's made even funnier by Sid appearing as the garbage truck driver.
    • The fact that he was still "singing" (really loudly, and really obnoxiously) makes it even better.
  • Though the boxing up scene is mostly tugging at your heartstrings, this moment is hilarious.
    Jessie: Don't worry! I'll be fine! [whispers] Besides, I know about Buzz's Spanish mode.
    Buzz: My what?
  • During the end credits, when the gang read a letter from Sunnyside, written in very neat, curly, and pink handwriting. It is not from Barbie, as they initially think, but Ken. The kicker? He signs it "Hugs and Kisses!"
    Buzz: That Barbie's got some nice handwriting.
    Jessie: Uh... Buzz? Barbie didn't write this...
  • The pairing of Rex and Trixie as video game partners, each getting excited about the game and then collapsing after they defeat it. The best part? Trying to high five each other even though Rex's hands are too short.
  • The Where Are They Now ending is both this and Heartwarming Moments. Five words: "Romeo. Wherefore art thou, Romeo?"
  • And who could forget this hilarious line by Mr. Potato Head:
    "I told you kids, stay out of my butt!"