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Funny / Tintin

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From the comics:

  • Some of Thompson and Thomson's slapstick moments qualify; in their first episode, they step through the cabin door of a ship and one of them bashes his head on the top of the door frame — the first mate tells them to mind their head, and the other responds with "Mind my head, of course.", ducks ... and trips over.
    • At one point, a photo of them falling down the steps in an attempt to apprehend the criminal is used in a newspaper article about the event, complete with Comically Serious caption.
    • The Thompsons' crowning moment has to be their Outdated Outfit appearance in The Blue Lotus.
    "Don't look now, but I think we're being followed." *are being followed by a huge crowd of Chinese civilians, dressed in normal clothes, who are laughing at them*
    • The entire sequence in Destination Moon where an X-ray machine makes them think there's a live skeleton walking around the complex. So they arrest and handcuff the skeleton in a doctor's office. The doctor is not amused.
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    • Thompson and Thomson have wrongfully captured Tintin. The latter escapes and handcuffs them both to one another. As they chase Tintin, the handcuffs get caught on a lamppost and they slam straight on each other.
    • One album even Lampshades this where Tintin feels sympathy for the detectives being constantly in over their heads.
  • From Red Rackham's Treasure:
    • Thompson and Thomson try to help with navigating. After reading the coordinates they give him, Captain Haddock tells them to remove their hats and pray. They do, and enquire why. The reason? "According to these coordinates, gentlemen, we are currently standing inside Westminster Abbey!"
    • After returning to Europe, Thompson and Thomson say they'll be staying at some friends' farm for a well-earned vacation. They end up working on an agricultural machine that look exactly like that accursed manual air pump they've been operating for the last weeks.
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    • The parrots on the desert island who are still mimicking the curses taught to them by Sir Francis Haddock centuries ago, and passed down through generations.
  • Whenever Captain Haddock loses his temper.
    • The time he doesn't lose his temper, and is faced with a reporter from the newspaper that had leaked their treasure hunting intentions. Instead of chewing the man out, he asks that he interview his secretary: Professor Calculus.
    • When Calculus is discovered aboard the ship, leading to the Who's on First? exchange culminating in "Separate pieces? My whiskey is in separate pieces?"
    • And when Haddock does lose his temper, some wonderfully creative insults are on their way.
    Mountebanks! Bashi-bazouks! ICONOCLASTS!!
    • Captain Haddock whenever he meets a Lhama.
  • The Truth Serum-induced Eviler Than Thou bit between Rastapopulous and Laszlo Carreidas in Flight 714. It was also even funnier in the animated adaptation, in which, after Haddock tapes their mouth shut, Laszlo starts chanting "I'M the baddest, I'M the baddest..." and Rastapopulous bursts into tears. Tintin then says that this will make an interesting story. In the comic, when Tintin bursts in, thinking Carreidas is being tortured, he is greeted by Rastapopulous politely asking his arch-enemy to tell Carreidas that he's more evil than him.
  • Pick a moment involving Professor Calculus. Any moment.
    Haddock: But we are in Jakarta!
    Calculus: Really? I could have sworn we were in Jakarta...
  • The bit in Destination Moon after Captain Haddock refers to Calculus as a "goat":
    Calculus: (while crashing a jeep through a guard outpost) MAKE WAY FOR THE GOAT!!
  • In Explorers on the Moon, Thompson and Thomson get a bit confused about the concept of lunar "seas", and wonder if there'll be a seaside resort on the Moon. Haddock sarcastically quips that they could get jobs as Punch and Judy men, to which the Thompsons take offense... eventually.
    Thomson: This man has apologized to us, and we demand an insult!
    Thompson: No, you great oaf! You're back to front!
    Thomson: Oh? You mean we've insulted this man and we owe him an apology?
  • In a conversation with Calculus in Tintin and the Picaros, Tintin and Haddock repeatedly end sentences with words that sound like "sister", leading Calculus to get increasingly annoyed: "And for heaven's sake would you stop talking about my sister!" He then thinks for a moment and remembers that he doesn't have a sister, before storming off in a huff anyway.
  • Snowy tried to steal a dinosaur bone from a museum in King Ottokar's Sceptre.
    • In the same comic, Tintin and Snowy had to hitch a ride with Bianca Castafiore to the Syldavian capital, and she decided to "treat" them to her music.
    • The fact that Bianca is world-famous despite every on-panel character hating her singing, with one of the few exceptions being Dr Calculus, who's poor hearing means the shrillness of her voice is scaled down and he can actually hear the tones. He's one of her biggest fans and is heavily implied to have a crush on her.
  • The Sticking Plaster Running Gag in The Calculus Affair.
  • The Castafiore Emerald has so many in the form of Running Gags and Brick jokes.
    • The step never being fixed until the end...wherin it is completely destroyed again.
      • The mason shown as being lazy.
    • "Helloooo! I can hear you!" ("Allo! J'écou-ou-oute!")
    • "No, I'm sorry, this is not Cutts the Butcher!" ("Non, Monsieur/Madame, ce n'est pas la Boucherie Sanzot!")
    • This one isn't a running gag, but there's something hilarious about the Paris-Flash tabloid proclaiming the betrothal of Haddock and Castafiore. One of the photos shows Haddock scowling murderously at Iago the parrot, accompanied by the placid caption "He opens his heart to the parrot she gave him."
    • After putting up with Iago imitating Bianca Castafiore he tells it to change the record after she's gone, whereupon it scares him by bellowing "BILLIONS OF BLUE BLISTERING BARNACLES, SHUT UP WHEN I'M TALKING!" in his face.
    • The remarkably surreal scene where Calculus attempts color television.
    • Haddock's nightmare deserves a mention. You can't possibly say that a parrot wearing a dress and singing opera doesn't make you laugh.
    • At one point earlier in the story, a Romani old woman offers to tell Haddock his future, much to his irritation. As he is trying to politely refuse, she appears to notice something on his hand and screams in surprise, causing him to ask what it is:
    Old Lady: You bitten.
    • Haddock's various snarks while watching the Castafiore getting interviewed:
    (After she announced she would be going to the United States soon): Poor Americans. They were so nice and quiet until Christoph Colomb arrived.
  • From Red Sea Sharks:
    • Haddock's in the bath when the phone rings. He has the detachable shower head in his hand, and mistakenly puts it up to his ear instead.
    • Castafiore comes to greet the rescued Tintin, Haddock and Skut. Haddock's (perfectly serious, slightly panicky) reaction: "Do we get back on the raft?", followed by this dialogue: "Ah, and Captain Padlock, er, Harrock" "...n'roll, Signora Castoroili. Harrock'n'roll!" (the Captain wearing what can only be described as a trollface).
    • One moment has Müller in command of a military base, tasking some aeroplanes to eliminate the convoy Tintin and Haddock are travelling with. Müller then says that armored trucks are on their way, and reiterates that Tintin's convoy need to be wiped out. The pilot commander, who is kind of an idiot, orders his planes to eliminate the armored trucks. Müller congratulates the commander on his excellent job, then as soon as he hangs up, realises what has happened. It can be assumed that the commander is dealt with.
    • When what turns out to be a slave trader boards the ship (thinking Haddock is the regular captain), Haddock kicks him off the ship and continues yelling his trademark insults after him, until Tintin points out the slaver is out of hearing range. Haddock then gets a megaphone and continues to rain insults until definitely out of range.
    • Haddock breaking the ship's steering mechanism and, after failing to fix it, trashing it in a fit of rage (and hurting his foot in the process).
    • An underwater Time Bomb gets mishandled and is swallowed by a shark, which keeps hiccuping until it explodes.
  • From The Calculus Affair: Tintin and Haddock are chasing after a kidnapped Professor Calculus. A friendly Italian driver offers his help by driving insanely quickly and dangerously after them. Then a policeman pulls them over:
    Policeman: Are you insane? I'm writing you up for this! What's your name?
    Policeman: (sweating bullets) Er, just don't do it again, will you?
    The Italian zooms off.
    Italian: Now we catch up on the time we missed!
  • Tintin, Haddock and Snowy getting drunk off wine fumes in The Crab with the Golden Claws:
    Haddock: (chasing a villain) Blackamoor! Anthracite! Coconut! Fuzzy-wuzzy! Cannibal!
    Tintin: Go on! Seek! Seek! Bite him!
  • A bit of Black Comedy at the end of Picaros, when Tintin gets the favor he asked of Alcazar for his help: That nobody, not Tapioca's troops, not his ministers, not even Tapioca, be shot. Made particularly hilarious by Tapioca begging that they spare him the horrible fate of being spared. He and Alcazar share a moment when they comment on these idealistic young people, what is the world coming to...
  • When the group's tent is blown away in Tintin in Tibet, they hear the yeti roar, then a crunch, and next we see it squealing in pain, having run into (and denting) a boulder.
    • Haddock's Unstoppable Rage on seeing his whiskey bottle drained by the yeti.
    • Also his freak out when he thinks Bianca Castafiore is in the next tent (It's actually the radio.)
    Haddock: Bianca Castafiore! She's HERE by thunder! That woman follows us to the ends of the Earth!
    • The Tibetan members of the team try to tell Haddock a story about how the Yeti once found a bottle of alcohol and drunk it. Problem is, said alcohol happens to be named "Tchang", just as Tintin's friend they are on a quest to find. As a result, Haddock is left wondering what the hell they are talking about as they tell him the Yeti "drunk Tchang".
  • There's a Running Gag in Secret of the Unicorn where Thomson and Thompson keep getting their wallets lifted. Eventually they decide to secure their wallets with elastic bands, which results in a bit of slapstick when the pickpocket shows up later in the story. Later, they are amazed that their wallets haven't been stolen, despite said wallets being on a chain (predicting, by coincidence, a minor fad in the 1990s). Finally, they pay the pickpocket responsible a visit, and a search of the thief's collection (he's a kleptomaniac who hasn't actually taken the contents of the wallets for his own use, and in fact feels some guilt over it all) reveals an entire shelf of wallets... with a conspicuously large section labeled "T".
  • Snowy manages to terrify a trained 'guard gorilla' into panicky retreat by barking and growling and is thinking to himself how ridiculous it is for the gorilla to be scared of something so small and harmless... when he spots a spider on the floor and beats a panicky retreat.
  • In The Broken Ear, one of Corporal Diaz's attempted assassinations of General Alcazar has him place a box of dynamite next to the general's quarters and light a fuse, which he observes from what he thinks is a safe distance under a statue of General Olivaro, Liberator of San Theodoros. As the dynamite explodes, he shouts, "Justice is done!" In the next panel, the decapitated head of General Olivaro gives him a concussion, and it turns out that it did no harm to Alcazar except give him a case of jaundice (which, to complete the picture, he had just been joking with Tintin about).
    • What is particularly hilarious is that the corporal forgot to bury the dynamite before detonating it. As one of the conspirators in the assassination coup Lampshades, putting dynamite next to wall produces nothing but a loud bang.

From the radio dramas:

  • From Tintin in Tibet:
    Haddock: I'm not going [to Kathmandu]! And when I say "no", I mean "no"!
    Haddock: So. We're in Kathmandu.


Example of: