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Funny / The Room

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"I did NAHT."

Ah, The Room. One of the most hilariously inept movies of all time. Is it any surprise it has its share of (unintentionally) funny moments?

  • "Hai, doggy!"
    • Even funnier because the lady seems to be one line behind in the script.
    • The lady is off-screen when she says "You're my favorite customer" as Johnny leaves, making it look like the doggy is the one saying it.
    • The lady and the dog also look a bit alike.
  • When Johnny has just had a fight with Lisa offscreen, and furiously talks to himself before noticing his friend Mark is there.
    Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true. It's bullshit; I did not hit her! I did NOTTT. Oh hai, Mark.
    • The above line deserves a second mention solely for Johnny's read of "I did NOT." His head swivels like he's unhinging his jaw, and the word "not" comes out sounding like some kind of mildly annoyed farm animal. That one word was the funniest part of the film for many.
    • He limply throws a water bottle to the ground while saying this to show how angry he is.
    • That seconds-long scene took three hours to shoot. Three hours. For the sole reason that Wiseau just couldn't get it right, and what's in in the movie is actually the best take they had.
  • "Anyway, how is your sex life?"
    • This is uttered immediately after Johnny claims he can't talk to Mark about what's going on at work because "it's confidential".
  • "And she's showing everybody me underwears."
    • Mike....period!
    • Also, Johnny's reaction to "me underwears". "You must be kidding, underwear, I got the picture!"
  • This barely audible exchange at the party:
    Guy's Wife: What do you mean, "hot"?
    Guy: Oh, I'm sorry. Did I say "hot"?
  • The fight scene for some strange reason. The dialogue by Johnny definitely helps.
    • "Don't touch me, mutherfawker. Get out!"
  • "You don't know shit, alright!?"
  • "I definitely have breast cancer."
  • "In a few minutes, bitch." Doubles as a Moment of Awesome for Johnny.
  • "Did you get your promotion?"
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  • The entire pot smoking scene.
  • "Johnny doesn't drink!" This is said immediately after Lisa tells her mother about domestic abuse.
    Lisa: He didn't get his promotion. And he got drunk last night. (Eyes shift downward) And he hit me.
  • The scene where Lisa gets Johnny drunk on a combination of scotch and vodka, capped off with Johnny in 'drunk' mode, which is less convincing than the average ten year old pretending to be drunk;
    Johnny: I'm tie-erred, eye'm waysted, I luhrff you duurhling.
    Lisa: Make love to me, Johnny.
    Johnny: (groans)
    • Tommy accidentally captured the audience's reaction to a third sex scene within the space of half an hour.
  • "Where's my FUCKING MONEY, DENNY!?!"
  • "Chicken, Peter, you're just a little chicken. CHEEP-cheep-cheep-cheep-cheep-cheep-cheeeeEEEeeeeeEEEeeeeauaa."
    • Even more hilariously brought up later (during the fight scene) with, "You betrayed me, you're not good. You— You're just a chicken! CHEEP-CHEEP-CHEEP-CHEEP-CHEEP!" He also looks stiff as a board when he does the chicken movements.
  • Speaking of Peter, the fact that, due to his actor's having to leave the project midway and that Wiseau insisted upon filming the infamous "football in tuxes" scene over the actually-important party scenes, the character's last lines are, "That's it, I'm done," is all the more hilarious.
  • "What a story Mark." It's how badly dubbed it is and how inappropriate the laugh is for the story that makes it hilarious. note 
  • "Wow, you look great! You look... a baby face..."
    • The extreme close up of Mark's newly shaven face, compelled with the dramatic music, as if it were supposed to be a shocking reveal. Greg Sestero called this one of the most embarrassing things he had ever done.
  • Another great piece of dialogue:
    Lisa: He got drunk last night and he hit me.
    Michelle: He hit you?!
    Lisa: He didn't know what he was doing.
    Michelle: Are you okay?
    Lisa: Well, I don't want to marry him anymore.
    Michelle: What?!
  • The drama of Johnny's suicide is ruined by a single line:
    Mark: As far as I'm concerned, you can drop off the earth! That's a promise.
  • "Leave your STUPID comments in your pocket!"
  • "Let's goh eat, HAAAUUU!"
  • The swooning romanticism of Mark and Lisa's interactions:
    Lisa: I miss you.
    Mark: I just saw you, what are you talking about?
  • "Denny, don't plan too much, it may not come out right." Johnny's response to Denny asking what movie they're going to see.
  • Lisa and Mark's reactions to finding Johnny's body after he decides "Oh hai, gun barrel!".
  • What makes it funny is that this all concerns a lifeless figure with mouth slightly agape, eyes open, with the head lying in a pool of blood and (presumably) brain matter.
  • Johnny's facial expression and silly wiggling of the tape when he shows it to Lisa. It's a lot less "I've got the evidence right here, you bitch!" and more like he's mildly smug.
  • Despite hitting the Despair Event Horizon, Johnny decides to mourn the fact that his fiancée future wife had been cheating on him by... humping her red dress.
  • Rotten Tomatoes' summary of the movie.
    A benevolent, friendly, selfless man who greets everyone with a disarming "Hi" discovers that you can't trust anyone after getting engaged to a manipulative, self-serving siren who seduces his best friend and destroys his life in The Room. Johnny (writer/director Tommy Wiseau) has everything a man could ever want: great friends, a good job, and a gorgeous fiancée named Lisa (Juliette Danielle). But Lisa's innocent act masks the fact that she's looking to bring Johnny down, and her manipulations are tearing Johnny apart. As Lisa informs her cancer-ridden mother, Claudette (Carolyn Minnott), that Johnny hit her (he did not hit her, that is bull$&*t, he did not), Johnny's best friend, Mark (Greg Sestero), finds his resistance to Lisa's seductive charms weakening. Meanwhile, local orphan Denny (Philip Haldiman) looks up to Johnny, and needs the older man's help after the teen rips off a drug dealer. What kind of drugs? It doesn't matter. Then guys play football in tuxedos, because you can play football anywhere.
  • "I owe him some money." "What kind of money?!" "I owe him some money!" "WHAT KIND OF MONEY?!?!"
  • "I feel like I'm sitting on an atomic bomb waiting for it to go off."
    • "Me too!"
  • Johnny grabbing an open box, which he then closes so he can open it for drama or something.
  • Johnny and Mark's rooftop conversation has them alternate between sitting down and standing up for no apparent reason.
  • Johnny and Lisa's sex scene, which involves sprinkling rose petals all over Lisa's bare breasts. After sex, we see that Lisa has petals stuck to her back and when Johnny gets out of bed, he grabs another rose and smells it before setting it down by Lisa who is still sleeping. It's practically a threesome with a plant.
  • Mike and Michelle's sex scene. Just when you thought the love scenes in this movie couldn't get more hilariously awkward, we get Mike's weirdly forced undressing, where he shoots both hands straight up like he's playing "Simon Says", then apparently orgasms as soon as his girlfriend puts her head in the general vicinity of his crotch. Not to mention this gem:
    Mike: Did you, uh, know... that chocolate... is the symbol of love?
    • Mike's sexual turn-on face is one of the funniest things caught on film.
    • "What are these characters doing here?" Intentionally or otherwise, Claudette's Leaning on the Fourth Wall is perfectly timed.
    • Later in the movie, there's Mike's "casual announcement" to his friends.
  • "It seems to me like you're the EXPERT, Mark!" There's something about the delivery of this line that cracks people up.
  • Johnny's Captain Obvious dialog to Lisa at his surprise birthday party: "You invited all my friends! Good thinking!". As if Lisa was just going to invite a bunch of random strangers and/or his enemies?
  • Johnny's reaction when Denny tells him that he thinks he's in love with Lisa:
    Johnny: If a lot of people luv each other, the wurold would be a better place.
  • Johnny's trashing of the room. The fact that he looks completely bored doing it (despite his character's supposed rage), the fact that many of his lines are completely unintelligible ("BLUDAHOLEWURLD!") and, of course, him casually picking up a CRT TV as if it weighed nothing (making it blatantly obvious that the thing is a hollowed-out prop).
    • Not to mention him feebly knocking the plastic fruits off the dish.
  • After the "where's the money" scene and before the "Oh hai Mark" scene is a riveting phone conversation where Lisa says "you just don't care" and Mark retorts "I do care". Eight seconds later we get the same exchange of words, with Mark slightly more frustrated for it.