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Funny / The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes

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  • One of the cases that Watson tries to tempt Holmes with is a circus owner appealing for Holmes's help to find some midgets who've disappeared from his circus:
    Holmes: Six of them, the Tumbling Piccolos, an acrobatic act of some circus.
    Watson: Disappeared between London and Bristol. Well don't you find that intriguing?
    Holmes: Extremely so. You see, they're not only midgets, but also anarchists.
    Watson: Anarchists?
    Holmes: By now, they have been smuggled to Vienna, dressed as little girls in organdy pinafores. They are to greet the czar of all the Russias when he arrives at the railway station. They will be carrying bouquets of flowers, and concealed in each bouquet will be a bomb with a lit fuse.
    Watson: [Breathlessly] You really think so?
    Holmes: ... Not at all. The circus owner offers me five pounds for my services. That's not even a pound a midget! So obviously, he's a stingy blighter and the little chaps simply ran off to join another circus.
    Watson: [Crestfallen] It sounded so promising.

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