The first sequel in the Jurassic Park film series may be Darker and Edgier, but it still retains plenty of humorous moments.
WARNING: Spoilers are unmarked.
- A Black Comedy example: Mrs. Bowman's choice of words while her daughter's being attacked by a swarm of Compsognathus:Mrs. Bowman: Cathy, darling! Lunch is ready!
- The page image captures the hard cut from Mrs. Bowman's shrieking upon seeing her suffering daughter to Ian Malcolm yawning. Seems heartless...but he's not actually on the island. Turns out he's just standing in front of a travel poster in a subway station, waiting on a train.
- In the commercial TV cut, which restores some deleted scenes, Mrs. Bowman's scream cuts to a yawning InGen executive in a boardroom instead. Now that guy probably doesn't care.
- Ian visits Hammond at his home. Both of them have moments.
Hammond: I'm not making the same mistakes again!Malcolm: No, you're making all new ones.
- Hammond explains Isla Sorna.
- When Hammond stands he suddenly grabs Ian's arm for support and says "thank you".
- Hammond tries to get Ian to join the expedition as the fourth member, which he refuses until he finds out Sarah is also going. Ian leaves to go to Isla Sorna and get her. After he is gone, Hammond quietly counts out four on his fingers and smiles to himself.
- While talking with Eddie in his warehouse, Ian tries to get a satellite phone to work and ends up banging it against the Mobile Lab's railing, much to Eddie's dismay.Eddie: Ah, ah! Don't do that, don't do that! You gotta baby it a little, love it a little.
Ian: I'll love it when it works.
Eddie: It'll work when you love it.
- Ian asks Nick why he joined Greenpeace. His answer: "Women." Malcolm's response: "Noble, very noble."note
- Nick dismisses the trip as a wild-goose chase, to which Ian replies that where they are going is the only place that the geese chase you.
- Kelly dismisses staying with her friend Karen for not having a Sega, calling her a "troglodyte". Ian responds in a very Ian way.Ian: Cruel, but good word use.
- This exchange between Ian and Eddie as they approach Isla Sorna by boat:Ian: Does [your rifle] work better than your satellite phone?
Eddie: That's funny.
- When they first get to Isla Sorna, Ian, Nick, and Eddie go into the jungle and find Sarah's backpack. Ian starts shouting "Sarah!" and Nick yells "Sarah Harding!" Ian stops, gives him a look, and asks "How many Sarahs do you think are on this island?"
- It gets a Call-Back later: When Ian, Sarah, and Kelly are searching for Nick in the Worker Village, Ian starts by just yelling "Nick!" before absentmindedly chiming in with "Nick Van Owen!"
- As Eddie and Nick watch a family of Stegosauruses pass by, Ian sums up the plot of every single Jurassic movie (or, hell, pretty much every dinosaur movie in general):Ian: Oh, yeah. "Oooh, ahhh." That's how it always starts. But then later there's running and, uh...screaming.
- Sarah startling Nick while he's taking pictures of the Stegosauruses.
- Sarah walks up to Ian and rambles excitedly about what she discovered so far, and Ian holds up her torn backpack and asks if she's been attacked. Sarah replies that her backpack always looks like that, to which Ian gives her a flat look that clearly says "Yeah, bullshit" and says "Okay, Sarah" in the kind of tone a parent uses with a child before calling them on their misbehavior, only for Sarah to head off.
- While Eddie and Nick watch Sarah as she gets close to a baby Stegosaurus, they're naturally slack-jawed while Ian is unimpressed and gripes about Sarah getting too close to the baby dinosaur. Ian asks the two guys why they're so shocked, and Nick tries to explain that he didn't really think he'd see actual dinosaurs.Ian: What did you think you were gonna see?Nick: Animals. Maybe, uh, b-big iguanas.Ian: [shakes his head] Fruitcakes.
- Nick and Eddie's reaction when they find out Kelly is Ian's daughter:Nick: [awkwardly, gesturing between the reunited father and daughter] Do you see any family resemblance here?
- What really sells it is Eddie giving a "yeah, a little bit" gesture in response.
- Ian still has trouble getting the satellite phone to work, so he puts it back on its cradle and gives it a few annoyed pats, causing Eddie to remark:Eddie: Violence and technology—not good bedfellows!
- And, shortly afterwards, when Ian continues to complain it isn't working:Eddie: If you just feel that qualified at any point, try flipping the switch to "on."
- And, shortly afterwards, when Ian continues to complain it isn't working:
- Ian and Sarah talking over each other. Sarah's trying to school the rest of the group about how they should interact with their environment, and Ian's asking Nick and Eddie if they want him to pass along any messages to their loved ones.
- Ian fumbling the parenting ball when he asks Kelly to wait outside the Mobile Lab so he can talk to Sarah alone, only to ask her to come back in not five minutes later, when she's barely out the door.
- Pretty much all of Ian's dialogue with Sarah firmly establishes him as a Snarkasaurus rex.Sarah: I'll be back in five or six days.
Ian: No, you'll be back in five or six pieces.
- Tembo has quite a bit of trouble with the pronunciation of the dinosaurs' names.Tembo: [chasing dinosaurs on the game trail] You're coming up on a... [flips through his dinosaur guide] A Pachy... a pachy...note Oh, hell. Uh, the fat head with the bald spot. Friar Tuck!
- And later, it seems like his team is having fun with his explanations:Stark: Say again, Roland, a what?Tembo: [throws the guidebook away after failing to pronounce "Parasaurolophus"] The one...the one with the big red horn! The pompadour! Elvis!
- And later, it seems like his team is having fun with his explanations:
- When Burke describes the way a Pachycephalosaur's skull is extra thick on the top of its head and is purposefully designed for absorbing impact, the Pachycephalosaurus helpfully demonstrates this by ramming its head into a car door with enough force to send the two men inside the car crashing out of the windows on the opposite side. Cue Burke and his pal turning around and making off to a safe distance.
- A compy is by Dieter's foot, leaving him to marvel how little fear it shows. Burke points out that, having never seen them before, the compy doesn't have a reason to fear humans. At which Dieter shocks the compy with a small cattle prod, sending it running.Dieter: Now it does.
- While spying on the InGen camp, one final jab from Ian completing the satellite phone Running Gag:Ian: Maybe I should ask to use their phone. Their dish is bigger than yours.
- Eddie's busy setting up the High Hide when Nick and Sarah speed past him, the infant Tyrannosaurus rex crying out. He pauses and watches the retreating vehicle, asking aloud "What the hell was that?"
- Ian and Kelly try to contact the boat, only to get a Spanish woman constantly speaking her native language and yelling at him, thinking he's somebody named Enrique. When Ian later tries another frequency and gets the same results, he quickly gets fed up.Kelly: Boy, is she mad at you.
Ian: I feel sorry for that guy Enrique.
- Ian's reaction to Sarah and Nick bringing the infant T. rex into the Mobile Lab to mend its leg while it's constantly screaming and snapping its jaws at them sounds less like the massive panic you can clearly tell he has, and more like an exasperated homeowner whose spouse and co-worker walked in with an unwanted stray dog.Ian: No, no! Honey, noooo...
- When Ian comes to the High Hide with Kelly, Eddie asks to know what's going on, and Ian tells him he's better off not knowing.
- In the High Hide, Ian tries to comfort Kelly when she talks about all the stories he told her about his ordeal in the park, assuring her that it's a completely different situation this time around. Then a T-rex roars somewhere offscreen. After a moment of silence, he asks if there is any way to get in touch with the trailer. Eddie doesn't even pause, speak, or look his way as he passes him the phone.
- Eddie gives Ian a brief tutorial in how to rappel down from the High Gide: Tighten your grip to slow, loosen it to fall faster. Ian promptly disappears from sight with a loud "whizz" and a thud from below. Eddie responds that he personally would have squeezed just a little tighter.
- Sarah needs an adhesive to hold the infant T. rex's splint. She sees Nick chewing on some gum, holds up her hand, and says "Spit." Nick spits—as in, he merely spits saliva into her hand. Sarah, disgusted, exasperatedly clarifies "Your gum!" while wiping her hand on his vest, and Nick takes his gum out of his mouth and hands it to her.
- After the Tyrannosaur couple seemingly leave with their infant, Ian sardonically harps at Sarah and Nick, telling them he uses plain English and doesn't have an accent that he's aware of.
- Nick, Sarah, and Ian, while dangling perilously in the Mobile Lab about to fall off a cliff, still have time to be sarcastic.Eddie: [yells down to them] What do you need?Ian: ROPE!Eddie: Rope! What, anything else?Ian: Yeah! Three double cheeseburgers with everything on 'em.Nick: No onions on mine!Sarah: And an apple turnover!
- In a Narmy way, the Velociraptor attack on the hunter in the long grass. Ajay is yelling at the top of his lungs to not enter the long grass and...he follows them into the grass to stop them. Then the hunters get attacked, but no one notices until they hear the raptor cries. One of the hunters looks up screaming wildly in a poorly-acted way when he's jumped by one of them.
- A bit of slapstick comedy when Ian, Sarah, and Kelly are attacked by Velociraptors in the Worker Village: After being separated from Sarah and Kelly, Ian runs into a small building to hide from one of the raptors, and the raptor responds by crashing in through the window, quite similar to how one of the raptors in the first movie solved the problem of Grant and company engaging the electric lock on the control room door. Ian quickly runs back outside, only for the raptor to easily jump through the already-broken window. He runs back inside again and the raptor once again follows suit. Ian then yanks the door off its hinges and holds it up like an improvised riot shield, only for the raptor to ram into him, sending him flying through another window, making an already funny moment even more hilarious.
- Then when Ian runs away from the builing altogether, the Velociraptor follows him...by bursting through the one remaining pane of glass.
- Ian gets a golden Brick Joke line, after Kelly uses a complicated uneven-bars gymnastics routine to kick a Velociraptor out the window.Ian: [incredulously] The school cut you from the team?
- After escaping from the SS Venture's cargo hold, the Tyrannosaur buck smashes through a sign in the harbor that says "No fruits, vegetables, or animals allowed beyond this point."
- The T. rex buck enters suburbia and approaches a house, waking a young boy who looks out the window and sees the buck, who sees him and makes a growl that sounds less ferocious and more fascinated at seeing a young human. The boy simply gets out of bed and walks out his bedroom.
- The buck, meanwhile, starts slurping up the water of the boy's backyard pool. When a dog starts barking at him, he makes an annoyed snarl, as if to tell the canine "Do you mind? I'm trying to have a drink here!" The dog quickly retreats into its doghouse.
- Also, just as the Rex is entering the property, he passes a basketball hoop as he happens to scratch his neck, making him inadvertently mime a dribbling motion.
- The boy goes into his parents' bedroom and simply announces that there's a dinosaur in their backyard. The parents don't stir, so the boy climbs into their bed and wakes them up. They don't believe him at first, thinking it a normal childhood fear of the dark and eventually go to their son's bedroom to reassure him there's nothing wrong, bickering loudly all the while...until they look out the window and see the T. rex buck right in of them, with the chain of their dog danging from his mouth along with the doghouse. The parents promptly scream; the boy...takes a picture of it.
- How does Ian plan to find the T. rex buck in San Diego? "Follow the screams." Cue a woman screaming, reversing her car in panic.
- A giant reptile is rampaging through a city, so of course there's a scene of Japanese businessmen running from it. And their lines translate to: "We left Japan to get away from this!"
- While the men themselves are a reference to Godzilla, they don't actually say anything, they're just screaming. The misconception comes from Inspector Gadget, which has a Japanese man in a crowd scream "This is why I left Tokyo!"
- During the scene where the T. rex buck bites the traffic signal, sharp-eyed viewers will notice that the street sign on the right reads "No Skateboards, No Dinosaurs".
- Ian and Sarah find the T. rex buck at a gas station:Ian: It's never gonna know we have it unless that thing makes some kind of sound!
[Sarah rouses the infant T. rex, who makes a groggy cry]
[The T. rex buck sniffs the air, then roars at Ian and Sarah]
Sarah: He knows.
[*CRASH* The 76 ball of the gas station rolls past their car]
- Later, as the T. rex buck is chasing them, Sarah suggests that Ian should slow down so they don't get too far ahead of the buck and lose his attention. Ian takes one glance behind them to see how close the T. rex buck is and promptly hits the gas harder. A nice Call-Back to the last time he was in that position.Sarah: Ian, slow down a little.
Ian: [glances behind him and sees the T. rex buck] Uh, I don't think so!
- Later, as the T. rex buck is chasing them, Sarah suggests that Ian should slow down so they don't get too far ahead of the buck and lose his attention. Ian takes one glance behind them to see how close the T. rex buck is and promptly hits the gas harder. A nice Call-Back to the last time he was in that position.
- When the T. rex buck is chasing Ian and Sarah, San Diego police and animal control show up. They have just enough time to get one good look at the T. rex buck before he roars, and they throw their cars into reverse.
- Just the fact that an animal control vehicle is there, too. Yeah, dinosaurs are animals, too, but you kinda have to wonder if they were thinking "So What Do We Do Now??"
- The "Characters" section during the film's credits calls one character who gets eaten by the T. rex buck in San Diego "Unlucky Bastard".
- After the bull T-Rex and the infant corner Ludlow in the ships cargo hold, instead of eating him right away the bull seems to actually nod his child into eating the screaming lawyer, in a very dad-like "go on, you can do it!" kind of way. Once the baby starts tearing into Ludlow, you can almsot see the bull thinking "attaboy!"
- The bearded paleontologist Dr. Robert Burke, who is eaten by a Tyrannosaurus rex, is an affectionate caricature of Robert T. Bakker. In real life, Bakker has argued for a predatory T. rex, while Bakker's rival paleontologist Jack Horner views it as primarily a scavenger. According to Horner, Spielberg wrote the character of Burke and had him killed by the T. rex as a favor for Horner. After the film came out, Bakker recognized himself in Burke, loved the caricature, and actually sent Horner a message saying, "See, I told you T. rex was a hunter!"
- Levine complaining about a Troodon being misidentified as a Velociraptor skeleton-wise. He later finds a Carnotaurus and misidentifies it as an Ornitholestes, an even worse error than Roxton's.
- There's an amusing juxtaposition following Howard King's death where, as the raptors are tearing his body apart and eating it, one of them ends up grabbing a candy bar that must have been in King's pocket and basically starts eating it by accident. The narration says that it seemed to be enjoying it.
- The protagonists' first encounter with the Tyrannosaurus ends a lot better than you might expect. The worst thing that happens to them is that...the rex sits on the hood of their car for a minute and marks it.