Funny / The Changeling of the Guard

• The play of Chapter 21. At first, Idol is entirely bemused by both the absurdity of Mareio and Luigette's plot and the ridiculousness of ponies pretending to be other ponies, but by the end of the play...
  “Nay, eat not the poisoned mushroom-” I began, and Topaz’s wing muffled the rest of my cry that the lover was not yet dead. It went unheeded, and the deed was completed with not another in the audience that attempted to halt it. I wept profusely as the curtain fell, the inevitability of it drowning me in sorrow I could scarcely comprehend.
• A Knight With Princess Cadance
  "I briefly wondered if the ground opening beneath me would have to consecutively breach every floor to the penthouse. Likely. I resolved to wish for a death less troublesome to the owner of this establishment."
• Chapter 47 is a barrel of laughs unto itself.
  • Pinkie Pie delivered Idol some sweets while he was on the train. This being Pinkie...
    “She delivered them to the station? Well, that was certainly nice of her-”
    “No, your Highness. She delivered them to the train and left. She claimed she did not have a ticket.”
    “...While it was at the station?”
    “No.”
  • While delivering his report of Ponyville to Princess Celestia, Idol displays some of his purchased wares and one in particular draws her attention.
    "And that?” [Celestia] raised a hoof to point at one of my items.
    “It is a chicken composed of rubber. I purchased it at the local ‘joke shop’. It is hilarious.” I stomped on the creature and it made a goose-like honk, followed by a squeaky wheeze. I smiled at the very absurdity.
• A somewhat meta (or at least Black Comedy) example, but after years of fan speculation as to how Idol Hooves would be involved in the changeling invasion of Canterlot, chapter 63 reveals... he missed the entire thing, because he and Topaz were too busy having round after round of wild sex. That's right, Idol Hooves missed the whole "Canterlot is openly invaded by Changelings" thing because he and Topaz were too distracted with making nookie.
• A Brick Joke years in the making; in chapter 29, after Idol and Topaz' first kiss, Wispy mentions that due to Topaz being a pegasus, any really good romantic/sexual stimulation will result in localized weather effects. In Chapter 63, after Topaz and Idol's first time, Idol wakens to discover that Topaz's bedroom is full of free-floating stormclouds. much to Idol's confusion.
• Idol's interactions with Discord. First, before the Spirit of Chaos even breaks free for the first time, Idol decides to spend his "day off" by cleaning the petrified Discord and rendering him immaculate. Then, in a Brick Joke, after escaping his stony prison, Discord tracks Idol down to confront him about it; it's hilarious how embarrassed Discord is about what Idol did, whilst the clueless changeling just keeps making Discord more flustered by sizing him up for a second clean.
• Chapter 66, "Tried and True", as the first chapter to have Idol interacting with Celestia and Luna after his unfortunate outing as a changeling, slowly swings the mood from the bleakness of the previous chapter to a more humorous one in multiple points.
  • Celestia's reaction to learning that Idol's infamous reputation as a Casanova actually stems from his surreptitiously offering food to his fellow exiled Changelings.
  • Followed by her learning that one of those mares he was seen sneaking into the castle was actually her sister in disguise. This causes her control to slip, causing her to break the stem of the perpetually full wineglass she is sipping from to control herself as she interviews Idol... which doesn't stop her from chugging from the now-stemless glass.
  • Once Celestia has confirmed Idol's identity, the topic of his Cutie Mark comes up. Idol confirms that, yes, he did see that specific goblet, but sadly it was destroyed when he got caught in a brawl between Daring Do and Ahuizotl. Celestia immediately deduces that this means Idol is "King Kookaracha", much to Idol's mortification, with his well-practiced complaints drowned out by Celestia's laughter at the fact.
  • Idol meeting Luna in his dreamworld. Which he has a very hard time understanding at first, since changelings don't dream.
  • Luna demands to know why Idol's dreamworld has her wearing the adorable little nightcap she wore during her brief stint with the flu. Idol can only shrug and admit he doesn't know why.
  • Luna mortifies Idol by revealing that the only dreamworld she's watched in which he hasn't simply lived out his pre-Invasion life to the norm was a very erotic dream, with Luna gleefully and deliberately using double entendres to emphasize her point.
  • Upon hearing about his horny dream, Idol confesses that he has recently felt the stirring of unfamiliar lusts. Luna physically backpedals and asserts that they are Just Friends. This confuses Idol, who points out that he knows Luna is gay, only for the princess to rejoinder that that's not such a dealbreaker for many stallions. Idol just finds the whole thing confusing.
• Chapter 67, "The Real McCoy", continues the theme of the previous chapter, this time quite firmly slanted from drama to comedy.
  • The repeated unintentional innuendos that Idol uses whilst trying to describe his relationship with Topaz.
  • When Idol interjects that the bare minimum punishment he expects is exile, Celestia's rejoinder is almost snarky.
    Celestia: “Yes, well, you expect a lot of unreasonable things. Lowering your expectations of unjust punishment almost feels like I’m disappointing you.”
  • Celestia, trying to encourage Idol to see Topaz, tells him that hiding from her in the dungeon is "un-guardly". A bemused Idol points out that he doesn't think that's a real world, only for Celestia to declare that, as Princess of Equestria, she has the authority to make it a real world.
  • Celestia bringing up the obvious question: with all Idol's Voluntary Shapeshifting powers, why does he look... well, like Idol Hooves? Idol is actually a little hurt when she brings it up.
  • In a Brick Joke, Idol realizes during his explanation of why he doesn't abuse his powers to give himself a more idealized form that Topaz wasn't exactly upset when he gave himself the pony equivalent of a Heroic Build back in chapter 22, "Under Armor".
  • The topic segues into the scar on Idol's leg, which an oblivious changeling explains is neither new nor originally his. This answer results in Celestia giving Idol a Flat "What".
  • Upon hearing that his legs were replaced, Celestia runs away in a mixture of disgust and panic, only to return almost bodily dragging the guard's official surgeon, Tender Care, who is initially less than happy to see Idol. Highlights of this sequence include "Damn it, Celestia! I'm a doctor of ponies, not some...insect surgeon!, Tender Care freaking out that Idol apparently stole somepony's legs, and Idol trying to calm the matter by assuring them both that he's fine, his grafted legs just itch a little sometimes. Which is a statement that finally hammers Tender Care's doctoring instincts into action, as his eye twitches just thinking about somepony having an itch inside their leg after having undergone surgery.
  • Tender Care's almost tsundere switching between praising the medical possibilities of the biomancy evident in Idol's care and his denouncing the obvious immorality of whoever developed it, since it would have required a lot of trial-and-error to get this working.
  • The capstone of the chapter: after the dramatic revelations of Chrysalis' biomantic abilities, with Tender Care wandering off to get drunk, Celestia asks jokingly if Idol has any other horrifying revelations to share. An embarrassed Idol confesses to her that he may be under "an element of semi-permanent mind control". Celestia's reaction just says it all.
    Celestia: “...Oh for Harmony’s sake.”
• Chapter 68 also has a few, even though it tilts back to drama:
  • "Mentasmo" returns, and is just as amusing.
  • Cersus tries to sneak Idol a way to escape, having read enough stories to know that he'd need something to file through the cell bars. It turns out she got him papers to file.
  • Mothchaser tries to sneak in to break Idol out of jail... and then she learns that the door is open and he could literally walk out anytime he wishes, he just refuses to go because nopony in authority has told him he can leave yet. She takes it about as well as you'd expect.
  • As does Nerium when she learns the same thing.
  • Mothchaser learns that Idol has a "daughter". She immediately protests that Idol told her he was incapable of sex, and Idol tries to assure her that a) he told her the truth, and b) Cersus isn't his daughter, though Nerium won't let the latter stand.
  • During the abortive jailbreak, Idol inadvertently mentions that he is now capable of sex, and Mothchaser immediately fastens onto that (and perhaps also to his revelation that he does find her attractive — well, distracting). Cue a confused Idol wondering why mares seem to like him that way, and Nerium chastising Mothchaser she has no time for fooling around.
• Chapter 69:
  • The "trial" of Idol Hooves before an assembled council of Celestia, Luna, Cadance and Shining Armor. It takes minutes before it breaks down into bickering amongst the three alicorns over how much "weight" their respective votes have.
  • When Cadance asks Celestia if she doesn't think that the Elements of Harmony could "clean (Idol Hooves) out", Celestia shoots back that they're not a diuretic.
  • Idol begging the princesses to please stop discussing state secrets in front of him.
  • An exasperated and overwhelmed Shining Armor demands to know how Celestia and Luna could let Idol Hooves geas himself into obeying Shining's every command. Celestia defensively retorts that she didn't let him do it, but rather that a great deal of Idol's weirdness just... happens.
  • Topaz finally gets to see Idol for the first time since the wedding was averted, and she is, understandably, pissed at him... until she sees the physical changes since the last time he was untransformed in front of her, whereupon she rounds on the collected royals in a protective fury.
  • Luna's embarrassed realization that the "dream" she saw of Idol and Topaz was not exactly a dream.
  • Idol doing his best to finally have a conversation with Topaz about their sexual congress whilst ignoring the fact that the Princesses are listening and conversing about it, even mentally dubbing them "the Peanut Gallery of the Most High".
  • When Idol finally comes clean about his belief that his and Topaz's sexual congress was the result of More than Mind Control, Topaz bluntly disabuses him of the notion that she wasn't in control of her actions, with Luna chiming in with a salacious comment that earns a shocked reprimand from Celestia.
    Topaz: “...Idol, you stupid son of a bug, I wasn’t under any sort of mind control! I knew what I was doing!”
    Luna: “Clearly.”
    Celestia: “Luna!”
  • Upon getting it cleared out that Idol was convinced that she was under Mind Control and he somehow compelled her into having sex, Topaz bluntly informs him that, no, she's been in love with him for a while, and he had better deal with it, because they're way past the silly awkward phase of their relationship.
  • Shining Armor and Idol's first conversation after the trial is momentarily adjourned? Shining demanding to know if Idol and Topaz really weren't shacking up prior to the wedding
  • Idol tells Shining that he has to "fix" Topaz being in love with him. Shining responds with the appropriate amount of sarcasm.
  • Whilst largely a grim and serious conversation, Shining's recount of his ascension to the position as Prince of the Crystal Empire does have some humor in it, most notably Idol comparing Sombra to an Ogres & Oubliettes villain, and Idol's disbelief when he learns that Shining ultimately defeated Sombra by throwing Cadance like a javelin.
  • A very confused Idol is woken up in the middle of the night by Princess Celestia... who says that "she" has summoned Idol to the throne room. It turns out that the "Princess Celestia" who was demanding Idol be brought there is... Cersus. As a small, pink, clone of Celestia. Idol is left absolutely speechless.
  • The guards trying and failing miserably to justify being misled by Cersus-as-Pinklestia. The first says he thought she was the result of a Fusion Dance with Cadance. The other accuses him of rotting his brain with manga and then asks just what he was supposed to do when confronted by the sight of Celestia looking like she was Shrunk in the Wash with a red sock.
• At the end of chapter 72, Idol finds his new living quarters in the Crystal Empire is a crystalline replica of the home he shared with Topaz Showers in Canterlot. Then he finds that Topaz is in it. Turns out, she and Cadance knew that Idol would try to run away to the Empire rather than talk about their relationship, so the two of them schemed to have Topaz move there as well. Topaz teases Idol mercilessly over this stupid plan.
  • When Idol protests about Topaz quiitting her job, she declares she found a new one: head of the Topaz Showers New Empire Entomology Research Center... or TSNEERC for short.^note "snrk" is an internet slank term used to signify badly stifled laughter.