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     The Original 

Chapter 1

  • "I lik video games like supper smash bras and otters"
  • ""if humin came from monkees why r their still monks"
  • ""hahaha!" he sad "you Christens wil be defeet on day! athests alreedy rule dis cuntry becuz of obama car and son all Christens will goto deaf panells!"" We aren't sure what "deaf panells" mean.
  • [God] was waring a rob and had a bread like he allways does.
  • ""lol ur a moran" God said and he stroked mr jonson with lighting and mr jonson ded."
  • "boo!" said the Heatrans
    erikatheraindeer:[Heatrans.] *grins like an idiot*[Heatrans.] I didn’t type that folks, it was spelt like that and capitalized like that from the start it’s just HEATRANS!!!)*pics of Heatrans spin around as “HEATRANS!!11!!” flashes onscreen*
Chapter 2

Chapter 3

  • "Also I no that Samas is a lesbain becuas when I firts playted I only saw her in amour soi thought she was a hot guy but then I usde her finale smash and fond out she was a gurl. I had to star at my pics off justan beber and jayncob 4 even longer then I usuely do wen Lauren comes over 2 kep me strait".
  • "Boozer keeped breathing firs at us an Falco shat lazors form his gum. Zelda turne dinto Shrek and throw needs at Boozer and hit hem wiht a chan. Son bowsar was defet. Ten Falcor git a smash bell and sumoed a gina tank call a lendmaster and shat Zelda so she flyed of and loosed."
  • "I cant im a librul vogon now so ican only eat vegetas."
  • ""never! BY THE POWAR OF LORD SANTA I SHALL BANESH U TOO SUBSPAS WORLD!""
    erikathereindeer: Sonic, what's the cheese level of this? *tosses him script*)(Sonic: IT'S OVER NINE THOUSAAAAANND!!!)

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

  • The notes:
    "STOP WRATING BAD THANGS ABOUT MY STOREY! If yall dont ill tell Lauren to beet u up. She rans crass country and plays batskeetball so shes in reel god shap (but she doesnt try to look manely or anythang becuz shes not a lesban and nether am I. We were makeup an nic close and put alota tim in r hare). Alos my bro is a senor lintbecker on the hi school fatball teem so he cold beet yall up even easer. Marry CHRISmass (NOY HAPY HOLEDAY) to the good people who wote good revews! (Im up erly becuz im so excite. I no ill get godo stuff this yer)"
  • "So we all went in2 the Miz to find Marth
  • "We open the door and saw that Marth was insid with Captan Futon and a buncha otter gay guys"
  • The fact that "the room" was capitalized.
    erikatheraindeer: Fic references movie of same quality. *ding!*
  • Zelda shat furballs and used the dimand sheld thin b4 turning into Shaq and using kun fu and ninja stuff
  • Link throwed his bonerang
  • Kirby apparently has a Hummer
    Tyranee: Kirby's like "Hiiii!!!" and then runs a bunch of them over
  • "cum on Snaek!" I shatted
    Duck, in Darkness The Curse's reading: Oh god! Oh god, no! No, don't cum on Snake or "Snaek"!
  • I was gong to find Samas and beet her up 4 sending Marth to Subspas were he turd gay but she wasnt in the manshan she was shoping at helms deep becuz shes a lesban

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

  • "wynaut" I said.
    Nanami: Because that's a Pokemon.
  • “becuz we nede 2 fite maches 2day and allso im brotesh so I thank socer is fotball becuz king jorge the turd was a America-hating commanst who hated America and name socker fetball in enguld so thet reel footbal cant be in brutishland.”
  • "3" I sed. We are still unsure what she was trying to say.
    • Maybe she was trying to say "<3" but that just raises the question of how you would even say that.
  • u will fite Math and Captan Fukton
    LJ: This fanfic is full of "fukton"
  • neither Marth nor Capetn Falcan were fat enuf 2 hit her
    Rash: So I guess all it takes is...mass to win?
  • Tom Tebo scared a buncha pants
    Holocaust Guy: I wanna see pants run!
    TanteiSakana: This isn't Kill la Kill.

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

  • "“No Link wen gayz and lesbans have sax they charg up with the powar of Satin and Barak Ovama! There 2 powarful rite now!” Ike sad."

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

  • Gangnamdorf was alredy gay so he was wering a weding dress with a wite vale and Bozor was waking him don the isle.
  • All the normel people wer ejaculated
  • “U insolvent FOOL!!!” Ganandarf sed
    Tyranee: You will never dissolve in water
  • He flayed up into the are and fired a magic blust at me lik in the gam macarena of tim
    Pit: EEEYY MACARENA!
    Ness: Of tim!

Chapter 12

  • Saten and Brak Obema suman the 4 wurst hysterical comanists.
  • Lauren had 2 comfart me (NAT WITH LESBAN SAX!!!) wen I telled her ur lyes abot us! STAP LAYING YALL!!!
    Tyranee: I wonder what a lesban sax would sound like
  • He was a leftwang excrement who killed consertatives in conservation camps.
  • Wen America defeeted him he channed the nam of Germeny 2 the Saviet Onion
  • The naxt comanast came out dong the Ganon Style dance. It's even better when you compare it to the last chapter— "Gangnam" was present where "Ganon" was supposed to be, and now the opposite is true here.
  • First he boned perl habor so we nuked him than he chaned his nam 2 Charlie 4 sum resin and fot my grandpa in Vetnam. Wen he did his lesban dotter Kimmy Jonquil tok ovar as presadent but than she died 2 recantly I thenk.
  • The last comanast was sumon I new very wall. It was MR JONSON!!! Mr Jonson is my sinance teecher and hes an athist who trys 2 shave evilusion don r throts.
  • "“Konichywa (“Hello” in Asian) Lord Satin!” Charmans Moo said."
    LJ: (as Mr Jonson) I don't try to shove any razors down your throats
  • “Ello guvnuh. Bluddy hall, u wankar! (thats how they talk in Britishland)” King Jorge said.

Chapter 13

  • Sum of u libruls r gettin upsat abot the TRUTH in my storey. Yall say Yall wil do bad thins 2 me if I post chaptar 13? Well, fin. THEIR IS NO CHAPTAR 13!!!
  • "Lauren and I had 2 take turds been awake so that noone culd snek upon is." Are the mansion bathrooms just as bad as the public ones?
  • Ladies and gentlemen, the single worst spelling mistake in the story: Barak Ovary

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

  • Obama gets one of the worst spellings yet in this one: "Ona,a". TanteiSakana's Dramatic Reading renders the pronunciation as "Onacomma-ah".
  • Satin and Obana pupped their paints
    • It gets funnier in the Let's Dub dramatic reading, where before this line, Tyranee points out that the way ActorsIllusion voiced Satan makes it sound like he needs to go to the bathroom.
      ActorsIllusion: *as Satan* I need toilet paper!

Chapter 16

  • "The naxt day I was along outsid of the Manshan loking at all the flowars and stuff becuz they smolled like Lauren and were pritty liek her" And she still denies it...
  • So I hed 2 us my finale smosh and turd in2 a angle
  • I sawed MOSEY DONG THE SECANT HOARSEMAN and he was ridding Godzela

Chapter 17

  • Link gets captured is about the be raped. How does he counter this? By pouring super glue in his ass
  • Borat Obaema
  • U wer play legan of zalda the wide wanker
  • U wer waring a gren shit
  • ONO! THAT WAS RITE! EVUL CLON SARA MUSTVE HAD ALL MY MAMMARIES!!!
  • Fenal Fantesy Steven
    Tyranee: I'm sorry, Final Fantasy Steven sounds like a gay porn.

Chapter 18

  • "Baffy the Umpire Slayar" A YouTube commentator had some fun with this
    Tyranee: She just kills baseball stars
  • "also Stain and Brick Obsma wer their and they war the evullest pepole 2 evar live."
  • “But u will fale since u cant beet the powar of comunism and gayness and LORD STAN!!!”
  • The very image of Hitler smoking marijuana
  • “I wont stop becuz im evul. B4 I changd the nam of Germeny 2 the Savet Onion I chaned it 2 Dutchland so I culd smok wed in amstardam evary day (if u lissen 2 his speches he sas Dutchland alota tims but nevar Germeny)” Hiter sed

Chapter 19

  • Mr Jonson and Becky mak a relly big evul guy outta the DNS of the 3 ded hoarsemans
    Tyranee: DNS? "Do Not Sit"?
  • Also they were cloths that sho of there big sexay bobs and there buttes
  • She was wennin the award form the genius book of word retards
  • “Im vary unheppy!” Staten sed “Hitlar and Moai and Kang Jorge r all died and Lonk escape b4 we cold turn him gay.”
  • “Bloody das boot kawaii!”
    Nanami: And I thought My Immortal had Gratuitous Japanese down pat. I was wrong.

Chapter 20

  • Goleth waked ovar to held Lauren stil but he was suddenly shat!
    Nanami: Frater ex Machina.
  • Wen he shat all the bulets he throed the gans aside and garbed 2 rockette lanchers and fird the rockettes than he throed sum groinaids.

Chapter 21

  • Wen Miss Dawson (shes not god enuf frens with Tiffany 2 call her by her furst nam) is a lesban shell go bye Ms Dawson becuz thats wat librul lesban womens do and than shell giv Sara a F and rap her.

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

  • The parken lot was petrol by maxipads
    Nanami: I’m not sure how Maxi-Pads are patrolling the parking lot, and I do not want to know.
  • Sonec runned reely fat and turd into a boll
    LJ: It must have been all those chili dogs

Chapter 24

  • Insanely wen I activeted my finale smish a buncha lesbans leept 2 pine me to the grond but I mad a fors feld that disinterested them
    Tyranee: Wow, that force field is so not interesting.

    Pit: "I'll get you- ...Nah, this is boring. [K bye]".
    Palutena: "Okay, where's my check!"
  • The very image of Peach wielding a chainsaw.

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

  • So we all want 2 the wite hose and entred threw the front dore. Suddenly a buncha libruls atecked us!
    Nanami: Stealth Gaming 101: Never enter through the front door!
  • Speeker of the Hoes Jan Boner
  • “Yes were also ned 2 get the planes 4 wite slavry becuz were all wite and dont wana be slavs 2 the blecks and the mixalots and the aslans” Guvanir Raimi sed.
    Rhuze: The world is just constantly singing Baby Got Back.
  • Sara and the conservatives searching the White House for Barack Obama's Ovary Orfice.
    Rhuze: You do not do that to a lady without permission!
  • Suddanly Barak Ebauma cam outta a roon wering pajamas with pictars of Lennon and Stallion and Car Max al with harts around tham. Imagine what those pajamas would look like in real life
  • "she" was a MAP with a PENS!!
  • “In a few yars ill get sugary 2 turn my pens in2 a vegeta and than ill get preggant and giv barf 2 tham and sand them back in tim with r tim masheen” Mishell Ogama sid.
    Chaos: I'm just imagining, like, Obama and Michelle are getting ready to do the dirty, and then, like— hahaha— Barack Obama pulls down her pants, and you just hear, "KAKAROT!!".
  • “now giv us the planes and the vaksine and well take the vaksine 2 Tiffany and make the planes pubic so wecan impasse Opoona and his gay luver and fail there evul planes”

Chapter 27

  • "And I have the powars of DOG!"
  • I shat holly bemas and she shat demonstrative banes
  • The fact Sara thinks Sepharoth is an old lady
  • "Than I had a idiot."
    Chaos: Yes! Yes, you did.
  • Lord of the Wangs Fallowship off the Ron
    Tyranee: Fellowship of the Wangs. That just sounds like a really bad gay porno.

Chapter 28

  • "And Ann Rand wrot Atlus Shagged wichis the most impotent bok evar expect 4 the Bibal."
    Rhuze: It's the X rated version.
    • Even funnier considering there is actually a book called Atlas Shagged

Chapter 29

  • Son we bet enuf demans 2 get to The Room were Lank was kapt wen the bad guys capturd him.

Chapter 30

Chapter 31

Chapter 32

Chapter 33

  • Suddanly Linkin puled of his mask the reveled that he was riley STAN THE HOLE TIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Chapter 34

  • The very fact that Obama tries to revive Satan with CPR when he was decapitated.

Chapter 35

  • "I cant beleve that aftar almos sex weaks of writen im fenally dun with my storey! Id lik 2 tahnk everone who sad gud thins both on fanficshun.nat and on archevofaron.orgy."

     The REEL Sekwel 
Chapter 1
  • Im writan this becuz the nude Smash Bro gaem will be hear in oktaver.
    Nanami: Nude Smash Bros, you say? Must be the M-rated version
  • ALSO LAUREN U R DUM!!! AND I SAWED A PICTAR OF UR NEW GURLFREN ON THE INTRANET AND EVAN THOS SHES NOT FAT (LIEK I WAS HOPPING) SHE DOSE HAS A RELLY BIG NOES SO I THANK SHE MITE BE JEWASH!!! I CAN SEE WY UR STIL USEN EVUL MAJAK 2 PUT LESBAN THOTS IN MY HED AND TRY TO TURD ME IN2 A LESBAN BECUZ IM SO MUK PRITTER THAN THE GURL UR DATEN NOW!!! BUT IT WONT WERK IM STRATE!!!
  • I was siten in my meth class
    Tyranee: Wow, so we're in a Breaking Bad fanfiction now.
  • "YO F*** THE POLITE DOG!!!" Mr Sandarsan sed.
    Tyranee: No! Not Duck Hunt Dog! Anything but him!
  • Mr Sandarsan gotted in2 a gunfite with the polise and they shat him ded. Than the polise laft the rome and the otter stoodants gotted ot boks 4 studey hal becuz we cant hav matt class if r matt teecher is ded.

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

  • Also thes chaptar wil prolly be shart becuz im writen this at my frend Chloes hoes.

Chapter 5

  • I hav gokarps that can fly an stuf frum the Maryo Carp gaems.
    Tyranee: It's just a bunch of Magikarps with rocket-fueled engines

Chapter 6

  • Sholk turd on car
  • Lucina turd on teh rado off car and startad lissen 2 Fansy by Igey Azala. (...) Alos she sez lotsa reely smart thins on twitar. note 
  • The very idea of Lucina being the Queen Of France note  and Shulk being the Fuhrer/Kaiser of Germany note 
  • In the author's note, Sara tells us that she's learning about Britain from a documentary series she's watching. The series? Game of Thrones. Critical Research Failure does not even begin to cover it.

Chapter 7

  • I c Obema is stil payen libruls 2 insalt my storey. Wuts wors is taht alota tham r foreners so Epona isant evan crating Amurican jibs by doen this (nut taht Obaba lieks maekin Amerken joebs becuz he gets rad of them with his hi texas on teh job craters liek my dad and also wtih job-killen regalatons).

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

  • "We r lose!" sed Lucina.
  • Than he kild Harey Potar the exact sam way he kild the gay illegol imegrant guy, buy stiken his fingars in2 Harey Potars eye sockats and than crashing Harey Potars skol with his bear hands

Chapter 10

  • "Well nao r u gona punash them 4 steel my car?" Kapten Fappin sed 2 Mastur Hand

Chapter 11

  • Expect Reun wuz werin a blon whig and Fiona died her hare bloo

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

  • The chapter title: CHAP 13: SATENS TROPE

Chapter 14

  • Wen she cum 2 my hose she sed the antire rooster off the noo Smash Boars gaem is on intranet and shoed me sum pictars. I laffed becuz they wer obveus faek. On of tham was Doktar Marik wich is jus stooped. Than theres Dork Pete who is Pot expect hes Drake. Than theres Duke Haunt whos a doug with a dick on his bak. And thers alos Bowzar Junor who Becky sez is Boozers sun. Becky muts thank im reely stooped 2 fal for thos pictars wich she obveusly mad in fotoshap in liek ten minuets. I meen Dr Maryo and Derek Pit and Duk Cunt and Bosore Juno? Wy wod they getin insted off otter pepole?

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

  • So I gotted farthor in Xenablad and nao im on the Bonass Leg
  • there ussed 2 be a ginormes monstar cald the Boners and aslo a ginormes robat monstar cald the Megatron

Chapter 17

  • All tha anemals stop ateckin Lucina and startad wankin awey

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

  • THE RETARD OF MATEL FASE

Chapter 21

  • "Metool Fase is taek Gud Clon Sara 2 Boners Lag in my wrold!!!"

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

  • Me and Gud Clon Sara and Sholk runed aftar Gananderp and he runed to tha rof off the manshan.
  • "And u wil dye!" sed Tampondorf.
  • He mad a reely big bal off evul and shat it atus.

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

  • It wuz a few dais b4 the babey showar and Me and Gud Clon Sara wer at the mal loken 2 bye babby presants 4 Foira. It wuzant eesy 2 fine presants becuz we didant no ifit wood be a boi ora gurl.
  • '"THE WAITER BROCK IM GOEN INTO LABAR!!!" she sed.' Note that this is only a few days after Fiora got pregnant.
  • "Ok Ican handel thes" sed Dr Marik "lets go 2 my operatan rome"
  • The dialogue between Fiora and Bowser Jr. This is immediately after he's born, by the way. The names here are spelt exactly as they were for each line of speech.
    Bowsar Junor: Mwa! Ha! Ha! Im evul jus liek my farther!
    Fiona: No! U ned 2 be Christen!
    Boozer Junor: Ok mom
  • "Sara I want u 2 be made of boner at the weedin."

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

  • When you think about the scene where Gurl Roban and Lucina kidnap Sara and Sara tries to escape the car, it becomes quite funny, as shown by a review left on said chapter.
    A silent but furious battle consisting of Sara and fem!Robin jabbing the lock buttons at top speed as the car zooms through the middle of nowhere. There is absolutely no sound in the car except the clicking of the locks and the whirring of the windows constantly being raised and lowered.
  • Chrom on a Pickup truck. Nuff said.

Chapter 28

  • Sara and Math and Math an Lucinas dad chas Gurl Roban and Lucina
  • Undar Kaytis relijon on fasebok it sez sumthin caled "Helix Fossil" is that sum tipe off Jewash liek hao my famely is Baptest witches a tipe off Christen?

Chapter 29

Chapter 30

  • "So libruls kep saiyan bad thins abot my storey. Butt im gona be liek Tailer Swoft and Shaq It Of becuz hatters r gona hat no matar wut I do becuz there libruls."

Chapter 31

  • I no alota thos r libruls who cum hear 2 say bad thins 2 try 2 diskredat me butt ino thers a silant majoraty that suparts me and iz lernin sumthin frum my storey and thell go and ejaculate otters abot the trooth off my werds. God Bass Amureka!
  • ""Wer gona kill u infodels! Praze Alan and Moehoward and Barak Oboma!" sed the Mizlams wen they sawed us."
  • "Sum Muzlums runed ovar and blowed themselfs becuz they wer sooside bommers butt we dogged the expositions"

Chapter 32

Chapter 33

Chapter 34

Chapter 35

  • While Dark Pit, Pikachu, Lucario, Captain Falcon and Mega Man's involvement in this story will offend a lot of people and the fact that the author considers The Wizard of Oz a musical for gay people, a reviewer made this picture to make the moment at least funnier
    WE ARE MASTERS OF FASHION!!
  • The moment where Dark Pit insults Sara, Palutena and Lucina's fashion sense could be funny to some, considering that Lucina is noted to having a hilariously bad taste in clothes in canon.

Chapter 36

  • "Aftar tha gud consirvatevs gotted the kee frum Derp Kit Lored Satin noed that it wuz onely a matar off tim b4 they goted the kee that Mastar Hen taked form Ganendirf and alos fond the otter kee. Fortanetly 4 us evul pepole Staten isant goen 2 givup taht essay so he taked tha lats kee and hided it dep withen subspas evan farter than the tv scren rome and than he gotted sum off the moast powarfel evul pepole he had 2 gardit and aslo he mad shur tat ther wuz lotsa demans and stuf in subspas 2 mak it reely hared 2 evan get 2 tha reely powarfel gards. Lored Stan is shur tat Sara wil nevar get tha kee nao. Hale Santa!"

Chapter 37

  • Naxt we had 2 fite the poakmans. Ther wuz Pacman the leeder off the poakmans and ther wuz Peekacho and Jiglaypof and Chairzar and Lukaro and Grenada.

Chapter 38

  • "Sudanly he turd in2 his ultramet farm. MASTERCARD!!!"
    Toaster in his review: MASTERCARD?! HOLY HELL, HE'S THE MASTER OF CLASSICS SUCH AS GO FISH, UNO, AND OLD MAID!! WUT EVAR SHALL WE DUUU???!!!

Chapter 39

Chapter 40

  • Sara gos thro Hell 2 fite Santa
  • "DO YOU REELY THINK THAT EVAN UR FINALE SAMSH CAN BEET ME? LUK AT THES MUSSELS! IM THE STRANGEST GUY IN TEH UNIVISION!!!" Satin sed.

Chapter 41

  • I puled ot an angle sord and dooled Santa and his bitchfork
Advertisement:

     Teh Ultamint War Agenst Librul Evul 
Chapter 1

Chapter 2

  • Rye was driven teh car and Roi wuz riden shogun and Lokas wuz in the bak.
    • The mental image of Ryu trying to drive, similary to Chrom trying to drive above. While the other two likely know nothing about vehicles at all, it's hard to imagine Ryu is much better either.
  • "Hi" sed Rio. He wuz frum teh Slut Fitter gaems witch r vary hard 2 play and I alweys loose.
  • "Hi" sed Roi. He wuz frum Fiar Album gams liek Mark and Lucina and Iek and teh Robans. He is alot liek Math and Lucina in Smash Bras butt he has rad hare insted off bloo hare so he probly isant there bruther he mite be there cosine or sumthn tho.

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

  • I alweys remamber seein him in intranet vidos cald Nentondo Durants
  • I wold vot 4 him butt im not gona bee old enuff 2 vot becuz ill onely be 17 an u hav 2 be 81 too voet.

Chapter 5

  • So we both gotted nakad in front of ech otter adn I aksed if I cold toch her bobs and she wuz ok with that.
  • SENSORSHIP IS RON AND THA SOSHAL JEWSTAS WARIERS WHO RITE ARTIKOLS ABOT PEPOLE AND CAL THAM RACEST AND SAXEST AND STUF SHOLD BE FARCED 2 SHAT UP!!!
  • "Bye tha way we cant dat anemore becuz I joned tha Fath Miltank frum sesan 5 of Gam off Throns so I werk 4 tha Hi Spearow 2 get rid off tha gays in Briten"
  • This line of dialouge:
    Mastar Hen: Sara wy r u bak! Wy wont u evar go awey! I want 2 get rid off u!
    Sara: Ur meen! and thers noting ucan do 2 kep me outa teh manshan! So go awey or ill beet u up liek last tim!
    Mustard Hanes: Ther mite be nothan Ican do 2 kep u frum bean in tha manshan, butt I wont let u stap Lauren and Kaetis wedan with ur intolerate hobbitphobia and if u evan try ill go2 tha medea and tel them wata bad persan u r! and ill giv u ditenshun agen!

Chapter 6

  • Kaeti runed at Jedis butt he turd sum off tha waiter in her buddy in2 win (I leerned in sians clas taht the humen buddy is mosty waiter. I dont no if tahts a librul lye or not butt pritend its troo becuz this wont mak sens otterwise) so Chaos got reely dunk and felled ovary.
  • Than God stroked Lauren with lighting and she falled unconshus 2.

Chapter 7

  • CHAP 6: SANTA IS EVUL AND MISTER HANK IS A JREK!
  • When Ryu preforms a Hadoken:
    Ryo: Hoboken!

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

  • I fled passed Teh Moan and Tha Son and than all teh plants: Meerkaty and Venice and Erth agen and Mark and Juniper and Satan andur Anus and Nicktoon and Plato (evan tho teh librul medea and lyen siantests say Plato izant a plant anemore. If it izant a plant hao wer tehy abol 2 send a spas ship 2 it 2 taek pictars tho? Explan taht libruls!)

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

  • "Wuts bluddy goen on sheela?" sed Rapert Mirdak butthan Meganium Kirlia tyed him up and throed him in The Room with teh otter Fux Nose pepole.
  • The image of Donald Trump and Megan Kelly going Super Saiyan.

Chapter 15

  • So we taked tha hellcopter 2 Rusha and landad otsid tha Kremling (witches wer tha presodant off Rusha livs)
  • Voldemort Poontang

Chapter 16

  • Melanie trying to get Sara to do some self-reflection. It fails miserably.

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

     Mishonh From Trump: Teh Fite 2 Saev Amrica 

Prologue

  • Sakurai trolling Melanie when she tries to make the Grinch leak real using her reboot of the Supper Smash Bros universe.

Chapter 1

  • On tha sied of tha car it sed "vape presadent of tha untitled stats".
  • "SARA! U NEED 2 CUM RITE NAO!!!!11!!" Penis sed.
  • "HURRAY CLITORIS?!" I shatted.
  • So we driv 2 Rusha butt wented tha ron way and ended up in Mexako bye mistak! Sudanly liek a bullion maxipads swarm tha car.

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

  • The fact that Galeem's incomprehensible-ness is completely ignored in this story. He sits at a chair in an office and, in the next chapter, sleeps in a bed.

Chapter 6

  • Sara and friends somehow have an all-out brawl with some Antifa members without waking Galeem.
  • Kin did marital arts and shat hobokens everwhere and Palpatine reined hooley furry on tha antefas.

Chapter 7

  • Sara's constant use of Insane Troll Logic, including stating verbatim that Dinosaurs Are Dragons.
  • "Were wer u wen we wer fitten tha antyfa dragun in Sen Fantastic?" I aksed. "I wuz watchen tha lust jedy with my sun" sed Boozer. That cheeked ot becuz libruls luv taht movey 4 distroyen Stair Wuz with soshal justas.

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

  • Lol Becky is so stooped. I sawed her posten onlin abot hao she thanks Jokar iz in Smash. Obvesuly taht isant reel becuz Teh Jocular is tha bad guy frum Bartman and wy wold they putt him in if Bateman isant evan in tha gam yet? Tahts dum. Alos I hav tha gaem and he isant init so I prov tha stooped librul Becky ron with LOGAK and RESIN liek Ben Sharpedo. Tahts hao smert Iam.
  • Sara acting like a tsundere towards Becky.

Chapter 10

  • "BUTT WUT ABOT MY FREEZE PEACH?!" I shatted.
  • "Shit up u stooped doog!" I shatted.
  • The commenters decided that, with this chapter, Sara had finally crossed the Moral Event Horizon. Was it because of some major racist, homophobic action that cost lives and was treated like a good thing? No. It was because she made Isabelle cry. Moral of the story: don't fuck with Isabelle.
    Commenter: I'm sorry, did this bitch just make Isabelle cry?! That's it! Go ahead and kill her, obviously-not-Ridley! And make it extra gory! NO ONE makes the good pupper cry and gets away with it!

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

  • Sara accusing Fem!Corrin of being the Antifa Dragon is this due to the utter Epic Fail.

Chapter 13

  • "Butt ur a dinsore witch iz tha saem thin ass a dragan" I sed "obvesuly taht mens ur tha antyfa dragun."
  • "Taxaton is thef! Big gubmint iz bad! Hilrey Cliton shold bee in prisan!" sed Yohi.
    Commenter: Good to know that even in the Supper Smash Bros world, Yoshi continues to evade his taxes.
  • Similar to the above accusation of Fem!Corrin, Sara accusing Boy!Corrin of being the Antifa Dragon. He only gets off the hook when he declares his love for Sara.

Chapter 14

  • The smashers grabbing the Idiot Ball and believing Ridley when he accuses Sara of being the Antifa Dragon. They only find out the truth because Ridley kicks a trash can over.

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

  • NAD B4 U LIBRULS SAY ANETHIN U SHOLD NO TAHT THERES NOTHUNG RON ABOT THINKEN ABOT PRITTY GURLS IN SEXAY UDDERWARE IT DOSANT MEEN IMA LESBAN.
  • I remambered watchen vidos bye a reely smart Britash guy naem Pal Josaf Twatson.
  • "Im not ur bruther im a gril nao chek ur prinplup ces skum!!!"
  • Ono! It wuz 2 laet! Tha soi beenz turded Simun Belmant in2 a transgengar!!!
  • The Belmonts grabbing the Idiot Ball and trusting Dracula, their lifelong nemesis.
    Commenter: This much shame hasn't been brought upon the Belmont clan since the Captain N era!

Cahpter 17

  • Like with King K. Rool and Incineroar above, Sara couldn't tell Bowser and Pichu apart while they are wearing masks and hoodies.
    • On the subject, the mental image of Pichu wearing a hoodie.
  • At the start of the match, Sara is said to fighting with fem!Corrin, only for the rest of the chapter to have Lucina as her teammate. A comment joked about this, followed by a rather laconic reply from PrincessAmerica.
    Commenter: So Girl Corn and Lucina are now the same person, apparently. Do they do the Zelda/Sheik transformation as well?
    PrincessAmerica: Aw, shit.

Chapter 18

  • "SARA CUM 2 MY ORIFICE RITE NAO!!!" Monster Hemp sed.
  • Master Hand throwing Sara out the window during a fight.
    Sara: Not an argomint!
  • I landad on tha grond a few melees away frum tha Manshan.
  • A particularly unfortunate misspelling: "Fondled". Normally, this could be at least somewhat overlooked, but considering that the character who "fondles" Sara has tentacles...

Chapter 19

  • 2dae I wented 2 skool agen. I shit nier Becky in thirst period Amanda Histray clas. I spant moist of tha clas starren at her WITH ANGRY! ALOTA ANGRY!!! Im stil anger taht she wuz toucan 2 Lauren on sitarday WUT GIVS HER THA RITE?!
  • The...ah...implications continue when Sara fights Dharkon—he never uses any of his moves from the game, instead opting to just grab her with his tentacles instead. This, combined with the typical misspellings of come, can create the impression of...well...
  • Than he shat tentacools at me butt I dogged tham.

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

  • Joker being on Sara's side becomes funny when you remember his ultimate persona is Satan.
    • PrincessAmerica commented on this:
      Oh, and for the discussion in the comments yesterday, here's something that I wanted to chime in with but didn't want to spoil this chapter. Yes, Joker's final Persona is Satanael (which, as you may have guessed from the name, is pretty much literally Satan), and thus Sara would likely have made Joker a villain if she knew. Your mistake, however, was assuming that Sara does any research whatsoever.
  • And of course, with this being Joker's debut chapter, someone had to make the obvious joke.
    Commenter: Well. Guess the villains...
    (puts on sunglasses)
    ...never saw it coming.
    (YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAH!)

Chapter 22

  • Joker—who has performed several impressive feats in his home series, and even got to be badass in the last chapter—gets easily threatened by forest animals. Not even mutant or magically-empowered animals, just garden-variety forest animals.
    Commenter 1: Apparently, the guy who saved Christmas by summoning Satan to shoot God in the face can’t handle some lions, tigers, and bears. Oh my.
    Commenter 2: Here lies Joker: Killed because he forgot he had a gun.
  • Among the various predators chasing Sara and Joker is a Tyrannosaurus Rex. Their reactions are priceless.
  • The two eventually reach a river filled with, among other things, sharks, giant squids, killer whales, and Loch Ness Monsters. Yes, the last one is plural.

Chapter 23

  • In this chapter, Sara claims to be dating Joker, as she apparently forgot Male!Corrin's confession...but the comments certainly didn't.
    • She also claims that, once she's old enough, the two of them are going to make "pure wite babbys" to save the "wite rase" from extinction. Joker is Japanese.
  • Master Hand punishing Sara by making her go to her room.

Chapter 24

  • So yestarday I went 2 talk 2 Lauren and she wuz vary maid at me. She sed taht Becky sed I wuz stalkan her and evan bot a gift saiyan I wuz a secrete admonisher. I explanned taht it wuz troo butt I wuz onely dong taht becuz I neded 2 prov Becky wuz a lesban. Lauren tolded me taht Becky sed taht tha stalken wuz crepen her ot and Lauren aslo sed taht teh most impotent thin wuz taht ben a crepe iz ron. Butt Lauren sed taht it braked her hart taht I wuz shoen so muk intrast in anotter gurl. Taht mad Lauren cri. Sean Lauren cri maks me fell vary sad and evan tho I dont undarstan wut I did ron I stil promased taht I woldant frollo Becky arond aneymor. Lauren thankde me with a kis (NOT IN A LESBAN WEY ITS NUMEL 4 FRENDS 2 KIS ECH OTTER IN SUM YUROPEEN CONTRIS) witch mad me fell liek I mad tha rite disishun.
  • Soros and his allies decide that the only way to stop Sara is to summon Marx. No, not as in Karl Marx, the writer of the Communist Manifesto; as in Marx, the reality-warping Kirby villain. Except it turns out that, in this universe, they're one and the same.
  • "Al hale Mark!" all tha libruls in The Room sed.

Chapter 25

  • "I ned 2 defet al off comanisum if I want 2 saev Amirka and Tromp butt its 2 hard!" I crayed.
  • Much like previous entries in the series, Home Depot is treated as a hellish place.
    • Heck, the fact that they apparently sell parts for time machines there.

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

  • In order to keep herself from becoming a lesbian, Sara thinks about Lauren. For some reason, this doesn't help.
  • The sheer idea of something like Dark Samus having sex with a human.
  • Wen we gotted bak 2 tha manshan we had 2 brake the noos 2 Roi taht his gurlfrend wuz a lesban nao. All tha conservativ mans taked Roi and Lonk 2 a strep club becuz tahts wer mens go wen they get sad insted of cryen becuz tahts not wut reel mans do.
    • The very image of Roy and Link going to a strip club.
      Commenter: Well, now EVERYONE feels awkward.

Chapter 28

  • In a few craptars we wil retch tha epoch concussion.
  • "Lol im a gyant glov a normel polis orificer dosent hav hancufs big enuff 2 attest me or a car big enuf 2 taek me 2 jale" Crazey Hen sed.

Chapter 29

  • Commulism wuz inventored in Rusha bye Marks becuz he didant lick teh zar. Tha zard iz liek a keen butt Rushan. Bak than teh zars naem wuz Ross Poutine teh garndpa off Voldemort Poontang. Merx wantad 2 bee tha commonest dicktaster and get rad off crapetalizm and teh zar. So he assembald a buncha folowers and ataked tha zars casserole and kild him 2 deth and than Rusha wuz a commulist contry caled tha Saviet Onion untel Amarka leded bye Roneld Regen (Amurkas gratest prezdent untel Donnel Turnip) wented their and kild liek a bajillion commulists and puted Validar Pooten in powar sins he wuz tha onely liven decadent off tha ded zar Ross Potion so he wuz tha riteful rooler.
  • "Thes iz a vary impotent mishonh so I thank we shold breen everone" I sed. Lousena and Dr Maro wer alredy their so I didant hav 2 gogeta tham. Butt I did go an get Mayo and Lonk and Samas and Yosi and Kurby and Loogey and Nes and Pech and Dazzy and teh Ike Clammers and Shaq and Mark and Yun Lenk and Roi and Cram and Pete and Snack and Ice and Lookus and Sonec and Keg Daddy and Tone Loc and Mageman and Roselia and Palpatine and Boi Roben and Grill Roban and Sholk and Dick Cunt and Ruy and Khan and Clod and Boi Koren and Reptar and Jokar. I stil felted liek taht wuzant enuff.

Chapter 30

  • Sara claiming the story is as historically accurate as she is straight.
    Commenter: So, not accurate at all but in rampant denial about it?
  • Mayo and Lugia shat furballs and jump on tha commanests heds and Dr Mayro did sum doktar stuf and charg tha commulists munny 4 it witch mad them dye off angry becuz comanests hat wen they hav 2 pay 4 helth car.
  • Bun Sharknado DISTOYED tha commulists with LODGING and RESIN and Alox Jons did a buncha manley screms untel he wented supper sayen liek in Dragenboll z and shat key blats.
  • Their wuz Lennon and Stallone and Hitlur (I no tha libruls clam taht Hitlar wuz rite ween butt tha notzees wer reely soshalests. TAT PROVS TAHT UR THA REEL NOTZEES NOT ME TAEK TAHT LIBRULS) and Mosey Dong and Fiddle Castrate and Vuvuzela Guy note  and Yun Gorgosaurus and Yun Hilrey Cliton and Babby Barak Obema and a buncha otter comanests (butt not Alaxana Okaso Cortze becuz she wuzant bored yet bak then).

Chapter 31

  • Sara hits Clitoris with fists maney tims and than starts fiten Murx.
  • Sudanly Yun Dolan Turmp puled ot a reely big sord and so did Yun Hilory Clitoris and tha 2 off tham had a reely big sord fite taht wuz liek in on of thos cartons frum asea.
  • The image of Marx chasing Rasputin.

Chapter 32

  • Marx's final words:
    Marx: MOOO!!!

Chapter 33

  • Hi agen everone. Its tim 4 my storey 2 bee ovary. Im shur u al had a gud tim reedin it expect 4 tha commulist libruls who wer distoyed bye my LOGAK and RESIN. I no thes wil 1 day go don in histray as tha gratest thin ever writed expect 4 Doneld Turnips bok Tha Fart Off Teh Dale.
  • The repeated misspelling of "clap" as "crap".
    Commenter: Jeez, these guys have weaker bowels than Ridley.

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