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  • The dating sim parody between Peach and Francis the nerdy chameleon, which he uses to ask Peach to marry him. The possible responses range from accepting to considering; one is "How much money do you make?" Peach snaps at the player no matter which choice is picked.
  • Many of Dimentio's lines, mainly because of how absurd they are. He's like Paper Mario's answer to Fawful.
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    • "Now we must duel! Like two gleaming banjos on a moonlit stoop!"
    • "And so I strike! Like an unseen dodgeball in an echoing gymnasium!"
    • "Ah! Once again we meet, like two angry, burly dinosaurs with terrible indigestion!"
    • "Now you and this robotic guardian can spend some quality time... Yes, quality snack time! When he snacks... on you! For you... ARE the snack!"
    • And, of course, his first shown interaction with Mimi...
    Dimentio: Hm...and here I thought Mimi's ideal world was a gem-filled pool with hunky lifeguards...
    Mimi: (transforms into Bowser) WHAT! Dimentio! Have you been reading my diary? ...uh...I mean... Never mind.
    • Dimentio's Dimension D allegedly multiplies his power by 256, making him invincible... or at least it would, except it multiplies your power by 256 as well. When you beat him the first time, his reaction to this idea is subdued but priceless.
    Dimentio: ...oh.
    • The real joke has to do with 8 bit computing. In an 8 bit system, the highest number one can have is 255 (11111111 in binary). Adding 1 to 255 would reset it to 00000000, because although the actual value should be 100000000, that would require 9 bits to store, and so the system either resets at 0 or 1, or crashes.
  • Fracktail, both before and after Dimentio fried his harddrive, had some funny lines.
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    • "Level 5 mustache detected!"
    • When he's searching his databanks for Mario's identification, his eye becomes the Wii Shop Channel Loading Screen, and he makes the same sound.
    • His system error meltdown and some of the emergency protocols his harddrive forces on him really say some stuff about his creators.
      • "I AM ERROR."
      • "SYSTEM MAY BE BUSY OR MELTING INTO SLAG."
      • "You lost everything. Way to go, genius."
      • "404 computer hamsters not found."
      • "THREAT LEVEL UPGRADED TO JELLY ROLL 1. DETONATION IMMINENT. BEEBLEBLIP!"
      • "CTRL... ALT... DEL!
  • Merlee and Mimi's catfight was surprisingly hilarious as well, including this wonderful line:
    Oh, please, you make me gag.
    I am hot, no need to brag.
    And you...well, you’re a hag!
  • Bowser in the beginning cutscene.
    Bowser: How many times do I have to tell those idiots? If you're the last one in, LOCK THE GATE!
    • "Hey, what's with the hairy guys up front! We SHAVE around here, minions!"
    • The bit about the locked gate gets a bit of a Call-Back later on in Chapter 3, when the heroes arrive outside Fort Francis to rescue Tippi. Bowser's initial reaction to seeing it is to ask exactly what it's got over his castle. And the first thing you encounter as resistance? A locked gate.
  • When the Cragnon chief is explaining that the Floro Sapiens have been making off with his people, he gives us this: "Now rescue team of Cragnons need to BE rescued!"
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    • "Nerd Cragnons name them Floro Sapiens."
  • In reference to the sleeping at the top of the page, Merlumina is the only one to ever realize that Mario fell asleep.
    Merlumina: And... You're sleeping again!?
  • Flint Cragley. Everything about him. CRAGLEY HO!
    • Also the fact that, of all things, you have to rescue his camera crew for him.
      • And they're not really in danger.
  • A Cragnon's reaction upon the heroes falling from the sky at the start of Chapter 5: "OH CRAG!"
  • The Catch Card description for the Dark Megabite: "This thing wants to end you. That's all."
    • A lot of Catch Cards, actually; Schlorp: "It's a vacuum cleaner! It's a worm! It's both! Don't feed it bombs, or you'll ruin its appetite. Forever."
    • "This Dark Ninjoe creeps around a certain secret pit. They move at the speed of DEADLY."
    • The Dry Bones card basically says that a possible reason why the skeletons came back to life is because they want to eat pie, which they apparently didn't get to do while they were alive.
  • The last few lines of Tippi's tattle of the Cherbils: "Some say the gas comes from their mouths. Some say it comes from elsewhere... ...Oh, dear..."
  • A minor one but it shows a lot. After Mimi insults Peach for not being a fighter (stating that she has two 'boyfriends' to protect her), Peach stands her ground and tells Mario and Luigi to let her fight alone. After she screams if they understood, they don't object. They just stare each other say 'sure' and WALK BACKWARDS away from the Princess.
  • In Chapter 5, the Floro Sapiens capture some Cragnons and go down a pipe.
    Tippi: Disappeared through a pipe, did they?
    Bowser: What am I, blind? Shut up.
    • Its interlude is golden. Nastasia punishes O'Chunks by forcing him to sing an song in Count Bleck's favor 1,000 TIMES! GOLD!
    O'Chunks: Raise yer chunks in the air, as the most debonair man o' men strides into the room! ♪
    Springin' forth from 'is lair as 'is foes all despair, for Bleck be the name o' their doom! ♪
    Whooa-OH! That's our Bleck! ♪
    Bleckity, Bleckity DOOOO! ♪
    Yeh, uh, somethin' Bleck...
    That's the guy who says...
    Woo? ♪
  • A lot of Luigi's lines are funny.
    Luigi: Oh no! I don't give my name to scoundrels! Just watch as Luigi punishes you for your badness!
    Luigi: The G-Great Luigi, you say? A... A daring defender? ...Me? Then I've got no choice! Luigi must spring into action! My fans need me!
  • Fleep, the flipping Pixl has been in the bathroom in Chapter 4 for 100 years, waiting for someone to bring him toilet paper. All the while, he sings nonsensical songs in a Spanish accent at the top of his lungs, punctuating each verse with "AMOOOOOOOOOOOORE!"
  • After defeating King Croacus, Tippi says quite possibly the most awesomely nonchalant line in the whole game.
    "We have defeated your king. Get over it."
  • The Underchomp battle, which is one big Shout-Out to early turn-based JRPGs such as Dragon Quest and the MOTHER series. The text in the battle in just ridiculous.
    "[Character] dodges like a pro"
    "Oh no! It's putrid!"
    "Now that's hot!"
  • From when you beat Mr. L in his Brobot L-Type:
    Mr. L: Awwww, WHAT?! No way! My Brobot L-type shoots missiles. MISSILES!
  • Tippi's snarky lines when you keep refusing to wear a space helmet.
    So let me get this clear: you enjoy NOT breathing.
    • Really, this scene as a whole of you choose the stupidest of decisions. What is really funny, however, is if you say yes to dying:
      Ugh. Who is stupider? You? Or me, for listening to you...No more...Good-bye
  • Near the ending of the game, Peach mentions she, Bowser, Luigi fell through the floor. Bowser landed fine, she landed on Bowser and comments it was a surprisingly soft landing, then she proceeds to mention they found Luigi knocked out.
    • Not to mention the hilariously casual gem Bowser gives right before that.
  • When Peach eats a Golden Apple in The Overthere in Chapter 7-3, she's fallen asleep. The only way to wake her up is by feeding her the nasty Black Apple. However, before this, the player can feed her the other color apples, some of which will make her giant, shrink her, give her a mustache, and even turn her into an actual peach!
  • Tippi gushing over Luigi's jump in one of her hint tattles. For comparison, she's usually calm, if a bit sad.
    Tippi: Luigi's jump is amazing! I'm sorry, Mario, but it's leaps and bounds ahead of yours!
  • When Squirps reveals the location of the pure heart;
    Tippi: The Whoa Zone? You simply must be kidding with me... I demand answers...
    • Followed by;
      Tippi: Who are you REALLY, you incontinent little imp?
  • Every. Flipping. Sammer Guy.
    Mustard of Doom (after losing): Be off, awful person...
    Rolling Thwomp: WORLD GOES SQUISH SOON! MUST TELL KING SAMMER! MUST NOT ACCIDENTALLY SQUISH KING AGAIN...
    • Having Tippi/Tiptron scan them can lead to other amusing facts about the guys in their off time. A yelling Sammer Guy apparently likes quietly reading the newspaper. A chef Sammer Guy makes brownies for the rest of the Sammer Guys, every day. And more, one for each guy, often completely unrelated to their characters.
  • Whenever Bowser Jaw Drops, it's pretty funny, but never moreso in the intro after Peach is compelled by Count Bleck into saying "yes" to marrying him, because it stays dropped. Then, the universe implodes.
  • Bowser's spinning arms. Just look at how fast they go!
    • What makes it even funnier is the fact that Dimentio actually references it later in the game:
      Dimentio: You seem to be missing the ravishing princess and the arm-flailer.
      • He also references it if your character is Bowser before the first fight with him in Chapter 3-3.
        Dimentio: You must be Bowser. I knew the moment I saw the flailing nubbins you call arms.
  • Attempting to buy goods from Flimm with a full inventory gives us this gem:
    Flimm: Here's a little business tip from a pro: try not to carry YOUR ENTIRE HOUSE.
  • The 66th Annual "That's My Merlee!" show. It implies that this same scenario has occurred sixty-six times.
    • The solution to the puzzle: Because the information you get from both Merlees is given without the context of what the original Merlee would say, you are left to use the fly buzzing around the real Merlee because she was hiding from Mimi in the toilet as the marker for which is the real one.
  • Squirps' reaction to being fed chocolate. No matter which kind you give him, they're all pretty funny.
    "CHOCO-BATTLE OF JUSTICE!"
  • It's still really annoying, but the Chapter 5-1 password is Actually Pretty Funny in its setup. The first password is three directions long, but for the second one, the password giver warns you that this one is longer and you might need pen and paper. Most players above a certain age will think "what, it's going to be six or seven directions long? Try me." Then the password goes on. And on. And on. For twenty-five directions.
  • The D-Men's incredulous response to Mario offering to help them defeat what they think to be the monster that escaped the Underwhere, which they've managed to lock in a room along Underwhere Road.
    D-Man: Tell you what... You head on in...and I'll mail your mustache to your next of kin!
  • The fact that all Francis wants is a single offline friend, given the reveal that an embodiment of trust and friendship was sealed within the walls of his fortress the entire time he lived there...only to be released by someone else.
  • The Void is not this by a long shot, but the way it's formed is, in a dark kind of way. The prophecy states that the union between a "fair and lovely princess" and a "furious monster king" would bring about the end of all worlds. Translation: making Peach and Bowser marry ends the universe.

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