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Funny / Subnautica

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This is where you can find the best comedy under the alien seas of Subnautica.

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    In-Game Stuff 
  • Spider Exo!
  • The famous PDA quote when entering The Dunes.
    Detecting multiple leviathan class lifeforms in the region. Are you certain whatever you're doing is worth it?
  • The death of Medical Officer Danby is darkly funny. According to his crew log, he cheated on his medical exams, and so had no idea how to treat his injuries.
    • Poor guy also likely got his probable cause of death wrong. He was so focused on his injuries and the green pustules of bad news that the local Warper probably came as quite the nasty surprise. Since it still cruises the area when you find the pod.
  • The new radio contact from the HQ telling you the code for the cabin of the captain has someone in the background ordering food and asking the speaker what he wants and the speaker keeps reacting to him, almost not managing to transmit the code to you.
  • When you build the scanner room, you can use two remote-controlled cameras to check out the area for natural resources. This is not funny. What is, however, absolutely hilarious, is that stalkers can and will take every available opportunity to steal your camera drones, leading to seeing a video feed of down a stalker's gullet as it swims off with your expensive equipment and stashes it somewhere, only to grab it again as soon as you try to escape.
  • When you get the Seamoth and drive it for the first time, you probably aren't expecting the morbidly comedic little thuds that come from running down innocent little fish.
  • Get out of the Seamoth too quickly and you can run yourself over.
  • The fact that Gasopods releasing their gas pods sounds like farting. You can even hear them laughing after they do so.
  • Go underneath a mob swimming close to the surface and shoot it with the repulsion canon. Team Rocket, blasting off again!
  • One of the possible suit designs is the Stillsuit, which can be extremely useful as it provides you with a regular source of water. Not only does this lead to some perfectly timed "water reclaimed" notifications during the scarier moments of the game, but whenever you load a save the PDA will offer you the choice of chemically neutralizing the taste—during the loading screen, for about two seconds before it accepts your "choice."
  • Upon picking up your first diamond, the PDA reminds you that the the plant is property of the Alterra Corporation, and that you are liable to reimburse the full market price of any materials you gather and use. It then goes on to inform you that your current bill stands at 3 million credits. Becomes a Brick Joke once you leave the planet, as upon being welcomed back to Alterra space, you will be cleared to land once your outstanding bill has been settled... which has jumped to 1 TRILLION credits.
  • When the player returns to the Quarantine Enforcement Platform to deactivate it after he's been cured, the probe once more has to take a blood sample from his arm (which he tries to dodge). He then punches the device... and hurts his hand.
  • Also the reaction of the probe after you dodged it. It seemes to look at you with the needle, extends and retracts it multiple times, as if it's saying: 'You won't avoid it!' before taking the sample, striking much faster than before.
  • Watching a Biter try to gnaw on the Seamoth.
  • Your PDA's assessment of your condition after waking up in the lifepod: "You have suffered minor head trauma. This is considered an optimal outcome."
  • Using a Vortex Torpedo on a group of Gasopods, Stalkers or other medium sized creature results in a whirlwind of very confused and dizzy creatures being spun unceremoniously around before being launched in a random direction. Better yet, they remain in a stunned state for a few seconds before recovering.
    • Taken up to eleven when used on a Reaper or Ghost Leviathan. The Vortex effect basically twists them into pretzels before letting them go. The effect has to be seen to be believed.
  • "Congratulations. You have exceeded your weekly exercise quotient by 500%. Data indicates swimming was your favorite activity."
  • You can find and scan an "unusual doll" in one of the destroyed lifepods. It's a bobblehead of Markiplier, which plays samples from his playthrough of Subnautica. That includes his yelps of terror.
  • In a darkly funny example, the PDA-entry of each creature you scan ends with an assessment of said creature, summarizing what the player should do with it, whether it be eat it, ignore it, or avoid it. The assessment for the Mesmer? "Draw closer."
  • The 2nd crew log from Lifepod #6. In which a not too bright crewmember lights what she thinks is a distress flare. Right next to the fuel line. The last thing the log records is a very loud explosion. Three guesses as to what happened? No, the first two don't count...

    Bizarre Glitches 
  • When it was in Early Access, Subnautica had a number of bugs that have since been fixed.
  • Sometimes creatures clip into the terrain, then remember how physics work and fly back out, getting launched into the void while spinning uncontrollably. Funny with smaller creatures, hilarious when a hostile Leviathan is subjected to it.
  • For reasons likely pertaining to Ryley and a door, if you were to exit out the Neptune Rocket, it can sometimes tilt into the ocean, looking as if it'll capsize, only for the rocket platform to slowly right itself. As showcased by Sethorven twice in his endgame.

    Players and Fandom 
  • The constant animal impersonations on the game's wiki and official Discord, ranging from mundane things like Bonesharks and Crabsnakes to A DESTROYED LIFEPOD.
  • The Gameplay Trailer goes through standard gameplay and then at a point starts showing quotes from different let's players. Most of them are praising the game. All but one:
    "AAAGH!" - Sodapoppin
  • Near the end of the game, each player has the option to create a time capsule, containing a message and a few items, and submit it to Unknown Worlds. If approved by the developers, it has the chance to appear in other players' games for them to find. Some of the approved capsules are serious and helpful, and others are... not.
  • Markiplier once headed off in the Cyclops at full speed. Warned by the AI that the engines were beginning to overheat, he says "What're you going to do, blow up?" Cue exactly that happening and Mark having an Oh, Crap! moment as he scrambles to put the fire out!
  • Jacksepticeye refers to The Lost River and everything else below it, nightmares and all, as "The Deep Down Dark Deep Down." This is both hilarious and utterly correct. He also, on occasions, refers to it as "hell". This is also utterly correct and also still hilarious, mainly because he looks incredibly uncomfortable while going down there.
  • Which is faster, the Seamoth or the Prawn suit? Using the propulsion cannon glitch to fly a cave crawler across the map, of course!

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