Funny / Star-Crossed

S01 E01 - Pilot

• Eric is starting in on the Atrians:
  Drake: We're not citizens.
  Eric: Oh, that's right. You're Martians.
  Roman: Well, technically, Martians are from Mars. We're from a far superior planet.
• Eric starts in on Roman again, at lunch break:
  Eric: You like talking to our girls there, Tattie? You think they're pretty?
  Roman: I was interested in joining her club, but she wouldn't have me.
  Eric: Oh, well.
  Roman: No, don't feel bad. (chuckles) It's just as well. I don't have an artistic bone in my body.
  Eric: Do you have any bones in your body?
  Roman: (pretending to think for a minute) Good point. Our, uh, skeletal system is made up of 10,000 centipedes holding hands, but that's Atrian secret number 145. How do you know that?
• Taylor's normally a Lovable Alpha Bitch, but her Alpha Bitch quality shines through as she mocks Grayson a little bit:
  Grayson: (to Emery) You're coming tonight, right?
  Taylor: (In an annoyed tone) Yes, Grayson, you're gonna see her tonight. (beat) God. Attempt to be cool. Even social newbies like Emery still like a little cool with their drool.

S01 E02 - These Violent Delights Have Violent Ends

• In the unsettled wake of Nox's death, the principal has announced the possible suspension of Homecoming:
  Taylor: I am all for equality, but when they start messing with tradition, that's when I go turbo bitch.
• At the Homecoming Carnival:
  Taylor: (scanning Drake's ticket) You here to campaign for homecoming king?
  Drake: You show me your school spirit, I'll show you mine.
• Later on, Sophie runs into Lukas and he asks her about bumper cars. The questioningly skeptical look on her face in response is very amusing.
• Taylor and Grayson observe Roman and Emery holding hands as they walk through the Carnival:
  Taylor: Are you still seriously trying to bang that drum?
  Grayson: She likes dark and mysterious. (awkwardly) I can be dark and mysterious.
  (Taylor's not buying it)

S01 E04 - And Left No Friendly Drop

• Grayson has just met Emery at the pasta restaurant:
  Emery: You know, I read that the whole carb-loading thing is actually just a myth.
  Grayson: (Chuckles) You think it's just an excuse for me to gorge myself with fettuccine Alfredo?
  Emery: Mmm, maybe.
  Grayson: Well, have you heard the myth about the girl who took a guy up on a date even after he did something stupid?
• Teri has found out a Collier Prep player deliberately gave Sophia a drink with caffeine in it:
  (Teri calmly removes her earrings)
  Teri: What you're saying makes me feel unwelcome and fills me with rage. (beat) There. I used my words.
  (She promptly grabs the other girl and headbutts her)
• In the aftermath of the brawl and impromptu friendly Marshall swim race:
  Grayson: (indicating his bandaged hand) I, uh, tried to punch a Collier swimmer and missed, but this vending machine is real unhappy about getting in my face.
• Eric joining in the brawl, despite his hatred for the Atrians. After watching for a while, he just shrugs and punches the nearest Collier player.

S01 E05 - Dreamers Often Lie

• Emery and Grayson's Indy Ploy to bluff the Red Hawk biker who beat up the Edendale store owner.

S01 E10 - What Storm Is This That Blows So?

• Taylor's absolute burn:
  Student: Humans, Atrians... I guess you get down with just about anyone or anything, won't you?
  Taylor: (swooping in between Emery and the student) And yet you can't seem to get with a girl of any species, can you?

S01 E13 - Passion Lends Them Power

• Roman grousing about Grayson:
  Roman: The eternal iwap blocker.
  (The Sondiv word lets him call Grayson a cock-blocker without actually using the English word).