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Funny / Phoebe and Her Unicorn

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  • In the first arc where the two meet, Marigold tells Phoebe to keep her wish realistic.
    Phoebe: Is this like the dream where the giant talking McNugget yells at me about nutrition?
  • In an early Sunday strip, Marigold is watching Phoebe play a Wii game.
    Phoebe: AUGH!!
    Marigold: "Augh"?
    Phoebe: I died.
    Marigold: You WHAT?
    Phoebe: Well, my guy died.
    Marigold: You will need some time to mourn.
    Phoebe: Naw, it's fine. I have another guy.
    Marigold: (rolling eyes) Humans are so callous.
    Phoebe: He knew the risks.
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  • In another Sunday strip, Marigold transports Phoebe onto a mountain, claiming that Phoebe texted her to bring her mountains. Phoebe is confused, since she recalls asking Marigold to bring her mittens, so she checks her phone.
    Phoebe: STUPID AUTOCORRECT!
  • In the early slumber party arc, Phoebe asks Marigold if she knows what a pillow fight is.
    Phoebe: No.
    Marigold: Good, because that never goes well.
  • In a Halloween arc, Marigold suggests going as a camel, with Phoebe as the hump.
    Phoebe: Is this just an excuse to hide me under a blanket?
    Marigold: No. Also, humps do not talk.
  • In the first Christmas arc, Phoebe is cutting a paper Santa for an arts and crafts project, when she accidentally cuts off Santa's head. After a Beat Panel of her looking horrified, she says "It has to be a bad omen to decapitate Santa."
    • In the next strip, Dakota is grossed out to see Phoebe gluing Santa's head back on, and asks why she cut it off.
      Phoebe: Because he asked too many questions.
      Dakota: TEACHERRR!
      (cut to Phoebe's mother reading a note from Phoebe's teacher and Phoebe grinning)
      Phoebe's mom: When you give me these notes from your teacher, you could at least suppress that grin.
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  • In a September 2016 arc, Phoebe is trying to get Marigold to look at the less attractive parts of herself to prevent from being trapped by her reflection again. At one point, Phoebe suggests Marigold making a weird face the next time she looks at her reflection, and Mari responds by doing a flehmen response.
    Phoebe: (covering her eyes) AAA, NOT WORTH IT!
    Marigold: Sometimes the cure is worse than the disease.
  • Phoebe has her dad's laptop, and is checking his browser history to see if he's been up to anything. His last search? "hello phoebe i know you're reading this"
  • Almost everything involving Sue, Phoebe's Cute and Psycho bunkmate from music camp. Some specific highlights...
    • When they are first introduced to each other, Sue is glad Phoebe doesn't play the clarinet, as she would have had to kill Phoebe in a jealous rage if the latter played better.
    • When Phoebe is telling Marigold about her.
      Phoebe: I think she plays the clarinet.
      Marigold: You think?
      Phoebe: She might just hit people with it.
      Marigold: This puts you at a disadvantage. It is harder to hit people with a piano.
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    • Sue is talking about how annoying and bossy her parents are.
      Sue, finish your homework! Sue, eat your peas! Sue, never open that shrieking box we keep in your closet!
  • Beware of vaulting into leaf piles when a unicorn is around...
  • Phoebe is at the beach, telling Marigold about how she likes to lift up rocks and watch the crabs scurry for cover, which causes Marigold to ask if Phoebe enjoys terrifying smaller creatures. When Phoebe replies "I guess", Marigold screams "LAND SHARK!"
    Marigold: You are right. That is enjoyable.
    Phoebe: (jittery) I should NOT have told you about that dream.
  • In a recent Sunday strip, Phoebe is watching her dad make screeching noises, by which a panicked Marigold comes in assuming she heard the "horrible battle-cry of the Northwestern Screeching-followed-by-stabbing Unicorn". Phoebe's dad explains that he was just explaining the dial-up internet to Phoebe.
    Marigold: Even MORE HORRIFYING.
  • Concerned their friendship maybe eventually strained through personality conflict/flaw, the self-absorbed Marigold takes up humility classes from Lord Splendid Humility. Phoebe declares that she wants her unicorn friend to just be happy being herself, and there are far worse flaws than recognising one's own magnificence. Cue Marigold sparkling with a radiant glee.
    LSH: You have undone my work!
  • One Sunday strip has Phoebe asking Marigold to enchant her broom to be like the witch heroine of her favorite novel. Instead, Marigold makes the broom sprout a mouth and start singing "The Song That Endeth Not".note 

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