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- The Introduction. Danny's riding a magnificent black stallion - who is actually Ninja Brian — across a beach.
- "The NSP Theme Song"
- Everything the band does, which includes: Running really fast, jumping super high, flipping over shit, making stuff explode, flipping over more shit, doing other things, trying out some bras (don't worry, they're man bras), and more.
- When Danny calls Ninja Brian fat.Danny: I didn't mean to call you fat. I meant stupid. And ugly. And fat.
- "The Decision"
- The Danny dummy falling off the building head-first...and then Danny getting up unscathed.
- 'Everyone in the band has an STD, except for me.'
- It's Brian! Brian has an STD—! (song abruptly stops) I'm sorry!
- Fans of the band are known to change this line to "Everyone in the band has a PhD, except for me." Brian Wecht, a.k.a. Ninja Brian, does, in fact, have a PhD in particle physics.
- Danny taking out a mugger... By throwing his dog at him.
- Dinosaur Laser Fight
- The entire song is an exercise in Serial Escalation, with dinosaurs, sharks and aliens participating in an intergalactic laser fight (did we mention this took place in space?).
- 'It's fucking science! Just ask Albert Einstein, he invented space.'
- Despite the absurd events of the song, Danny is quick to point out that 'it was quiet, because in space there is no sound'.
- The students staring at them completely unimpressed while they dance around and rock out to the song.Student: Dr. Sexbang, did this really happen?Danny: *pauses, then nods* Yeah.
- Objects of Desire
- The realization that Danny has basically fucked every inanimate object in his girlfriend's house.
- Brian frying whole oranges, meditating, and clapping while Danny is screwing everything in sight.
- "If We Were Gay"
- Donnie Sexbag and Ninjab Ryan.
- Danny's insistence that if they were gay, it'd be mostly Brian.Danny: Here's a list of things that Brian likes to suck: dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick BALLS!
- When Danny starts singing the, "your dick, my dick, your dick, my dick" segment, he accidentally points to one of the girls. You can actually see her react with a very hilarious WTF face.
- Danny being shot by a poison dart and then falling down a cliff for a good ten seconds.
- And then getting shot again.Danny: Unnecessary second poison dart.
- And then getting shot again.
- Special shoutout to live performances such as this one from MAGFest '16, where Brian keeps shooting darts at Tupperware Remix Party after Danny, complete with "NINJA BRIAN" chants from the crowd afterward.Danny: (after getting back up) DON'T applaud that!
- No Reason Boner
- Ninja Brian slapping the facial hair off Danny's face at the start of the song.
- Danny's blatant, enormous erection that persists throughout the song.
- The dramatic scene where Danny knocks over the coleslaw with his boner.Danny: I like coleslaw but not that much.
- The scene at the post office.Danny: I have to go. I have a...uh...doctor's appointment at the dentist.
- And subsequently, the scene at the zoo.Zookeeper: Hi! Welcome to the zoo!
Danny: Great! I love the zoo! Look at all those monkeys!
Zookeeper: Actually, those technically aren't monkeys, they're macaques!
Danny: Wow! Macaque's really hairy!
(the zookeeper looks unimpressed)
- "Puppies In Space"
- They can't survive.
- 'There is no sound in space. We know. Shut up.'
- Sex Training
- Danny and Brian not-so-subtly attempting to kick the guy they're training out so they can have sex with his girlfriend.Danny: We'll wait out here with your girlfriend. Unrelated question, where do you keep all your lube?
- 'So much knowledge to discover.' Cue Danny and Brian reading a book titled 'History of the Butt'.
- Danny and Brian not-so-subtly attempting to kick the guy they're training out so they can have sex with his girlfriend.
- The manticore is a dude note wearing a mask, fluffy claws, fake teeth, blue tights and American flag briefs.
- Danny jumping to the conclusion that the guy holding the boom mic must be a zombie, since the manticore already ate him.Danny: It's not like there wasn't already enough on my mind...like the manticore.
- 'Manticore, where are you now? Are you gone forever?...oh, nope, there you are.'
- 'You may want to cry out loud 'MANTICORE, YOU ARE WRONG!' Too bad he already killed your ass in the first verse of this song!'
- "You Can Do Us"
- I Just Want To Dance
- The guy Danny kills at the start spurts blood all over his mask. When Danny takes the mask off, the blood's all over his face.
- Danny changing the course of European history, causing it to be renamed 'Ninjatown'.
- Unusually, a lot of the comedy comes from this video being the band's first film clip, causing a bad case of Early Installment Weirdness and Hilarious in Hindsight for people who've watched their other clips first. Examples include Danny himself being a ninja and a killer, openly suggesting he's not interested in romance anymore, and Ninja Brian with a singing role and his mask off.
- Three Minutes of Ecstasy
- "Accept My Shaft"
- All of Danny's euphemisms, particularly 'gargling my bacon' and 'introduc(ing) you to my friend, Excalibur'.
- Danny congratulating Ninja Brian.Danny: Ninja Brian, you did a pretty okay job too. I'm particularly impressed by how you're simultaneously playing piano, pan flute, maracas and a gong next to me right now. It almost makes me regret calling you fat, stupid, ugly, and saying that you have an STD throughout the course of this album. Even though all those things are true.(the music stops) ...I mean, not true. (music starts again)
- Danny congratulating Ninja Brian.
Strawberries and Cream
- "Intro (Strawberries)"Danny: Won't you hold on a moment while I stop having sex.
Danny: Cool. Thanks
- "Best Friends Forever!"
- 'Punch the Tail On the Douchebag' with Mel Gibson's face on it.
- Mario!Ninja Brian, with bulging, bloodshot eyes.
- 'A few deaths I could look past. At three hundred, I was concerned.'
- Danny's reaction to Brian killing Ninja Jim.Danny: Really, Ninja Brian? During the chorus? *scoff* I can't stay mad at you.
- Ninja Brian stabbing Danny.Danny: Is that a knife? Oh, it's a knife. I can tell by the way it's stabbing me. *sigh* Good talk, buddy.
- "Unicorn Wizard"
- All of Danny's 'Precious Fucking Memories' involve him kicking Roger in the nuts in various locations.
- "...and that thermos of soup! ...I'm hungry, but also thirsty, and you can kind of eat and drink soup at the same ti—LET'S GO!"
- Danny summons Ninja Brian to save Roger from his muggers...only for Brian to high-five them and help them beating him up.
- Brian as the wizard's sidekick, 'Princess Handjob', and their hellhounds (Pomeranians) Tinkles and Gary.
- Danny failing to lift a cinder block...before Brian picks it up with one hand and tosses it aside.
- Danny's conversation with his mom at the end of the song.Danny's Mom: Danny! Danny, wake up!
Danny: Oh! Hey mom! I had the craziest dream! I was the unicorn wizard!
Danny's Mom: Aww... shut up.
Danny: Uuuuunicorn wizard...
Danny's Mom: I said shut up.
Danny: YOU shut up!
- The cold outro, where Ninja Brian threatens to kill Tinkles and Gary with his mind. If you wait long enough, their heads glow, the screen blacks out and you hear mushy explosions.
- "Let's Get This Terrible Party Started!"
- The premise itself; Danny and Brian are holding an amazing, mind-blowing party...only to reveal it's a bunch of guys playing Dungeons & Dragons. It only gets worse from there.
- Jon's invite is titled 'You're Invited, Dickbag!'
- 'Alright, this party sucks. Ninja Brian, explode this building with your mind!'
- The cold outro, where Ninja Brian stabs and murders Slender Man.
- "Next To You"
- Danny proposes using a candy ring.
- Danny's impressive list of places to jack off. Notably, during a Zombie Apocalypse.
- When Danny's explaining himself.Danny: You should know that I'm not doing this for myself. It's partly for you. But most of all, I'm doing this for America.
- Danny's attempt to make his friend jealous by having a threesome.
- Once again, the cold outro.Danny: You're welcome for Ninja Sex Party video. Did that one have enough jacking off for you? (laughs) Me neither.
- Danny then admonishes Ninja Brian's stealthiness as he poorly hides behind a pot plant...while the real Ninja Brian comes in from the side and chokes him to death.
- Symphony In P Minor
- The Bait-and-Switch of being a dramatic piano piece to being a bouncy ditty about Danny putting his penis in your face.
- In the video, Roger trying to tackle the mic off Danny when he realizes what he's singing.
- "The Sacred Chalice, Pt 1."
- See below in the Youtube Exclusive Videos folder for examples of every part of the Sacred Chalice.
- "Everybody Shut Up (I Have An Erection)"
- The fact Danny has an erection is more important than whatever anyone else has to say, whether it's girly gossip, a court case, or the President giving an important press conference.
- In the court case, Danny shoves his junk in front of the Game Grumps crew. Arin is surprised, staring at it, Ross is terrified, Barry slowly covers his eyes, Suzy looks extremely weirded out, and the manticore is there.
- The entire bridge:Danny: If it makes you feel better, I'm a fucking rock star...WITH AN AMAZING PENIS! (rainbows fire from his dick area) But enough about you, let's focus more on my crotch...
- Here's a tricky dick that can't be impeached.
- Danny is shot and killed by the president's guards at the end of the song.
- FYI I Wanna F Your A
Danny: If you want me to F your A say "yeah"!
- Every acronym in the song.Penis
Dicking (oh so)
Made (out of)
- In the RPG part, after the girl of the week and Danny roll a few 20-sided dice, Brian pops over and places one huge die right over theirs
- The end of the song.
- And again, the cold outro. Danny beats Brian at chess, and Brian knocks all the pieces off the board with a large knife.
- Every acronym in the song.
- "Shredded Metal"
- Brian's complete and utter failure to write a convincing metal song, and instead writing a 'bloopy reggae jam.'Danny: That's just the underwater effect on the same song. Come on, man.
- "Brian, I know you love bloopy reggae jams! Now is not the time!"
- When Brian finally plays the song:Danny: BACK WHEN SATAN RULED THE LA—
(Brian goes back to playing his bloopy jam)
- Here's the animated version.
- In the live version the bloopy reggae jams turn into a parody of Bob Marley's "One Love" about buttsex.
- Brian's complete and utter failure to write a convincing metal song, and instead writing a 'bloopy reggae jam.'
- Rhinoceratops vs. Superpuma
- Danny gets a call from the president of space to help save the world...while Danny's cooking baked potatoes. He's not happy.
- The Rhinoceratops and Superpuma step on Danny's lawn. It'll cost Danny $25 to get that fixed. At least. Oh, and scratched the paint on his car. And that is definitely space rhino jizz on his porch.
- How do Danny and Brian stop the monsters? They figure Superpuma's a girl and Rhinoceratops is a dude, so they play music that gets them intensely in the mood that they fuck each other till they're tired.
- Doug sucks, but that's a story for another day.
- The Ultimate Sandwich!
- Danny's having sex with your mom. When he asks Brian to pass him a romantic novel to get her in the mood again, Brian accidentally hands him a cookbook.
- The ranch dressing is in a bucket labeled 'Sex Lube', crossed out.
- Danny, as the titular sandwich, failing to defeat his boxing ring adversary, the Banana Girl.
- Danny accidentally revealing that he wants to fuck the sandwich.Danny: ...And you've got a sandwich that I'd like to fuck!
(Ninja Brian and your mom looks horrified)
Danny: ...I mean, eat.
- Your mom corpsing when Ninja Brian throws the yams on the bed.
- Part of Danny's training includes downing two uncooked egg yolks. It goes about as well as expected.
- The ending, when Danny reveals he nailed Ninja's Brian's muffins as practice.Danny: Oh... but... not the one you're eating right now, Brian... Alright, I fucked that muffin too! You gunna judge me? You gunna be a Judgy Jason about this?
(Ninja Brian cleaves Danny in two with a katana)
Danny: ...You have cleaved my entire body in half.
- Ninja Brian staring intently and applauding as Danny fucks the sandwich in front of him.
- The outro, again. Realizing Danny has no idea what he's typing, Richard the subtitle guy types captions insulting Danny. Sadly, Brian can understand them. It ends about as you would expect.
- The Brick Joke from the opening.Danny: Hold on a moment while I start having sex again.
- Ninja Brian unconsensually massaging you with scented oils.
- Danny admits on recording that he hates Ninja Brian, and then realizes he probably shouldn't have said it on permanent recording.Danny: Well, I am off to change my name and address. Just as soon as I stop having sex. (beat) There we go. (beat) Wait, no, I started again.
- The Brick Joke from the opening.
- "Party of Three"
- Danny's date's room is covered in Hello Kitty merchandise.
- "Eat a Dick: A Collection of Romantic Poetry"
- Danny's casual indifference to Brian murdering the waiter.
- Brian's "apology" card, which contains nothing but a hole through which Brain sticks his hand to give Danny the finger.
- Ross's intense pelvic thrusting in the pool, while wearing a floaty.
- Arin Hanson as the DJ.
- 'I'll take you home and give you vitamin P! That stands for penis!'
- Danny's majestic mount, the Barry-cornnote .
- "Dragon Slayer"
- All of Danny's Blatant Lies, such as winning the Super Bowl by himself, or bench-lifting an entire continental shelf. And of course, the actual topic of the song, the dragon in question.
- After claiming to have "cured all diseases last week" it shows Barry taking a swig from the "cure" and looking immediately better. Brian snaps his neck anyway.
- The return of the majestic Barry-corn. Danny slays the dragon by throwing the Barry-corn at him.
- Danny fought Karate Bears to get to the dragon.
- The book Danny shows the girl in this song: Stuff That Totally Happened. By MyCaruba.
- Danny stood up a lunch date while on his quest. It was Ross.
- Brian's awkward shuffle during the dragon dance.
- To prove that his story is true, he summons the 'dragon', which he claims to have slain.
- The dragon is definitely a dragon, and not some guy Danny met at the bus stop in a dragon suit.note
- Ninja Brian starting directly at the camera throughout the entire video, even if this means changing position in between shots.
- The object of Danny's affection ends up choosing all the other guys but him. Also the dragon, Ninja Brian, and [the manticore.Danny: Oh. I see you've chosen the football player...(sighs) And the scientist...aaaand apparently the weightlifter as well... And the dragon... And Ninja Brian ...And— The manticore!? He wasn't even in this song!
- All of Danny's Blatant Lies, such as winning the Super Bowl by himself, or bench-lifting an entire continental shelf. And of course, the actual topic of the song, the dragon in question.
- Attitude City
- Danny's perpetually clumsy handling of his cigarette.
- Diplomas from the University of Keeping It Real.
- To add to the continual library of classic NSP literature, "How To Rock, By Danny Sexbang". The picture is of Arin looking disheveled and holding a rock.
- 'Punch-Activated Montage Simulator' pillow.
- Danny's badass acts involve running half a mile in 47 minutes, watering his grandma's plants and having tea and biscuits with her, bench-pressing 5 pounds, and sleeping between his mom and dad when he has scary dreams.
- Zoo party.
- At the start of the bridge:Danny: Ninja Brian, would you lay down a sick flute solo for me?
(Brian shakes his head)
Danny: Thank you.
- The entire bridge, which starts when a gang of thugs attempt to start a fight with Danny and his crew. Cue them turning the song into a cheery Mayfair-style acoustic song.
- The majestic Barry-corn returns again, this time playing guitar.
- The bridge ends with Danny giving them his wallet before abruptly returning to a rock song.
- The animation in the final chorus (done by Gregzilla of Game Grumps Animation fame) has Danny and co. riding bikes, following by riding majestic, jacked-up horses, and then the horses jumping on and riding the bikes while Danny and co. are still riding ''them''.
- Brian's horse joins him in staring right at the camera.
- ROCK FUCK!Danny: Sorry, I don't know why we said "fuck" there.
- ROCK FUCK!Danny: Sorry again?
- "Why I Cry"
- The opening, featuring five Dannys, each in a different colored kimono, harmonizing with each other.
- Unicorn Barry makes another appearance, clearly getting tired of being used as Danny's steed.
- Danny crying violently and flailing around in bed right next to his unimpressed date.
- Ross as a newborn fawn, doing a "forest dance", which ends up with him and Barry rubbing their butts against Ninja Brian.
- "Even when I use a sextant, I cryyyyyyyyyyyyy (they measure angles!)"
- Danny trying to keep from crying by thinking of a duckling riding on the back of a puppy, while wearing a slightly tilted cowboy hat. And then crying anyway.
- Samurai Abstinence Patrol
- And will Danny win first place in his spelling bee? The championship word is "nomenclature".Danny: Uhh, N... O... C—[buzzer] Fuck it!
- At the end, he tries again.Danny: Phew, here we go... N... R-[buzzer] This is literally fucking impossible!
- And will Danny win first place in his spelling bee? The championship word is "nomenclature".
- Peppermint Creams
- "THE PEPPERMINT CREAMS ARE YOUR BOOBIES!"
- One of the deadliest trials is Danny covering himself in burgers and entering a lion pit. It Makes Sense in Context.
- Death Hamsters, wielding guns.
- Ross, Markiplier, Commander Holly and Jessica Marzipan as the gods, mocking Danny. Brian's also standing behind them.
- Holly's reading a copy of 'Godmopolitan' magazine, with the cover article 'Flatten Your Abacus.'
- Also, the fact that they are credited in the description specifically as "Holly Conrad, Jessica Marzipan, Markiplier, .............. and Ross."
- "ALSO YOUR BUTT! THE TERM PEPPERMINT CREAMS ALSO REFERS TO YOUR SWEET BUTT!"
- Danny can't decide whether he likes the princess' boobs or butt more. He chooses the boobs in the end In the music video, after he admits this, the princess looks down at her own boobs, then shrugs and nods as if to say "yeah, that makes sense"..
- Road Trip
- "I BANGED LADESH!"
- "No time for spacesuits, I'm way too horny! Let's show this galaxy what's HUAKKKKK" *pop*Satchel: So...what you're saying is you guys had sex all over the world, and then you died in space.
Danny: That is correct.
- The premise of Road Trip, in and of itself, is hilarious. After going on several successful dates with a smart and beautiful girl, Danny decides to go on an national boning tour because he doesn't want to start a meaningful relationship. From there, the sex puns never stop coming as Danny bones his way across America, around the world, and into space.
- Steel Panther guest star as themselves in the video... and the Swedes Danny bones. One of their members ends the video by reminiscing over his own year of boning.
- The beginning of the video has Danny playing with My Little Pony plush versions of himself and Ninja Brian.
- The victims utter confusion at the Mood Whiplash between being chased by murderous demons and being offered cookies by adorable devil cookie girls.
- "That fuckin' do anything for ya... Megadeth?"Danny: [Phone rings] Hold on. Dave Mustane, [lead singer of Megadeth], how's it going! Yeah. Uh huh. Yeah. Okay, cool, talk to you later. [puts phone away] It does nothing for them.
- Buttsex Goldilocks
- Danny realises a serious problem with the incredibly sexually explicit song he and Brian are writing for a performance for sick children at a hospital - it's too amazing.
- Nailed it.
- The title track, ''Cool Patrol'', features Dan and Company trying to help a high school student (played by Jacksepticeye) stand up to bullies. Their "help" consists of teaching him a highly convoluted instructional dance with steps like "rub that peanut butter on you", "slap a camel", and "grab a bird from the sky and eat it whole". After the Cool Patrol finishes teaching Jack, he goes to confront the bullies and gets KO'd with one punch.Danny: Your training is complete! Now, go show the fuckers who's boss!
Jack: Okay! (confidently strides towards the bullies) Hey, guys! Listen up! "You put your hands in"—
Danny: (flinches) OH, GOD! He might... He might actually be dead.
(Ninja Brian nods, Markiplier throws up)
- ''Eating Food in the Shower''. Dan's attempts at saving time for sex by eating food in the shower results in soaked food and a big mess. Taken up to eleven in the second verse, where Dan takes his date out for a romantic dinner in her own bathroom, even inviting some friends and a mariachi band. It doesn't end well for anybody involved.
- The intro of the song, where Danny sings about how him and his date are both very busy people. She has her career, and Danny... shoots an awkward look to a pile of costumes and burgers labelled "Danny's Business Stuff", and then says that he "does 'stuff'."
- ''Danny Don't You Know'' features Danny advising his younger self not to cry, and bringing him to an NSP concert to show him how cool he will be in the future, and then he calls for the crowd to sing along, leading to:Crowd: D! A! N-N-Y! He's a super awesome guy! D! A! N-N-Y! He is not afraid to cry!
Crowd: D! A! N-N-Y! He cries almost all the time!
Crowd: D! A! N-N-Y! He cries and cries and cries and cries!\\Brian is holding up cue cards]]]''
Danny: OK, thanks guys. Very helpful. Thank you. OK, shake it off, shake it off...
- Danny, against all odds, has finally found a woman he loves on more than just an aesthetic level. This would be very sweet and emotional if not for Dan' comparisons of romantic love to sexual attraction. In particular, he mentions having a "Heart Boner" for his new girlfriend.
- In the video, Danny and his girlfriend (played by Carolyn Vasko) share a kiss towards the end, much to the shock of Ninja Brian and the colorful cast of cartoon animals in the room with them. A deer even mouths the words "Oh shit!"
- "Romance Novel" features an excerpt from a romance novel... However, it's written by Danny, and ends up being about as subtle as you'd expect. And then Ninja Brian starts expressing his opinion of it.(piano smashing sound)
Danny: Eat dicks, Brian, this is romantic as fuck! Do not throw that piano at me again!
- "Ninja Brian Goes to Soccer Practice". It ends about as well as you would expect.Danny: WHY DOES HE HAVE GRENADES?!
- "Courtship of the Mermaid." The song initially begins with lutes and wind instruments, describing Danny and Brian seeing a mermaid in the middle of a golden pond in an enchanted forest, with Danny of course falling for her at first sight. He realizes that he needs to approach this delicate moment perfectly. The lute music stills, and after a few seconds...Danny: HEY, DO YOU LIKE PIZZA?!
- And when the mermaid fails to notice Danny throwing a pizza to get her attention?Danny: MORE PIZZA, BRIAN! With onions and ham. Now coat me in pizza and throw me, goddamn!
- The song, of course, ends with Danny getting both his legs broken from Brian's throw, then having to watch a handsome merman present the mermaid with fillet mignon ("That's a clearly superior dish!"). They then start boning ("Wow. That was fast."), and the choir of angels that sang during Danny's ill-fated throw leave him on the ground when he asks one of them to take him to the hospital.
- Before that:Danny: Hang on, I'm going to hop over there and tell her I love her.
(sickening crunching sound)
- Before that:
- And when the mermaid fails to notice Danny throwing a pizza to get her attention?
- First Date is a note-perfect Arena Rock pastiche about finding new love with a beautiful girl... and committing increasingly-heinous crimes together. The first chorus has Danny enthusiastically suggesting, over a soaring .38 Special-esque riff, Lets steal a car tonight! and the evening escalates from there to art theft, murder, and mass murder. Perhaps predictably, theres no second date.
- In the video, there's no second date because Danny wusses out of actually committing the crimes, and the girl falls for Ninja Brian, who actually did all of it!
- "The Mystic Crystal", being an epic example of Epic Rocking, has too many moments to count, but includes:
- The King asking Danny and Brian to go rescue his daughter, and Danny pointing out that he just got sucked through 27 dimensions of space and time and he's not doing too well at the momentDanny: My arms are broken and I don't know why my chest is smoking.
- Brian lighting the way with this magical arrows, right into Danny. When Danny asks Brian for a little more warning, Brian shoots him twice more.
- The trip involves many perilous destinations, including the cliffs of Erectile Dysfunction, so Brian gets Erectile Dysfunction. But only Brian.Danny: I know, it's weird.
- The Princess telling Danny that his heart is kind and only light can stop dark, so Danny knows how the Necromancer must be stopped:Danny: Stand back, Brian, I'm going to hug him!
- At the end of the song, NSP stands before the portal that will take them back home, and they stop a step away to turn back in heroic poses. And Brian kills a guy to maintain his rep.
- The King asking Danny and Brian to go rescue his daughter, and Danny pointing out that he just got sucked through 27 dimensions of space and time and he's not doing too well at the moment
- The first skit track, "The Wishing Bear", has Danny and Brian venturing into a cave in search of the titular animal so that they can each get one wish. There's just one problem. It's not the Wishing Bear.
Danny: Oh, real fucking nice, dude.
- And at the end, as he lays dying, Danny asks Brian to take his hand. Brian smashes it instead.
- This line from Thunder and Lightning, after Danny starts and seemingly wins a street fight
- "Turns out being struck by lighting
Doesnt give you any powers
They caved my head in with a pipe
And beat me for several hours"
Danny: Lord, if you're there, please infuse my nuts with the power of a thousand suns.
- But it's okay, because Danny knows an Ancient Prayer.
Danny: Holy shit, you're real?!
- And then,Odin actually appears in the clouds and does it. Danny was apparently not expecting this.
Youtube Exclusive Videos
- "The Sacred Chalice", a four-part series detailing Danny and Brian's adventure searching for the titular chalice.
- Part 1:
- Danny showing Kristen his super sweet Japanese castle...and then ending up in a regular bedroom.
- Danny casually pointing out his random memorabilia in his room...and then Ninja Brian.
- When the chalice appears, it falls dramatically from the ceiling into Danny's outstretched palm.Kristen: What is that?
Danny: Oh, this old thing? I'm surprised you noticed.
- Kristen's expression when Danny says he hired a hooker to help them on their adventure, and his subsequent backtrack.Danny: Uh, actually there wasn't a hooker, I, uh, just remembered... (singing) that was another robot.
(Kristen nods, genuinely convinced)
- They don't have footage of when they fought the dragon and mountain lion, but that shit totally happened. Cue Dramatization with toy figurines.
- Part 2:
- The recap of the first part.Announcer: In the last episode of ''The Sacred Chalice: A Quest: Part 1...
Danny: This is the Sacred Chalice of Ragaloh.
Announcer: And now part 2.
- The bridge keeper's deadly challenge: eating an entire sandwich.
- Said eating of the bread is censored...and when they come back, everyone but Danny and Ninja Brian are dead.
- Danny flipping off the North Star for leading their friends to their death. The Star responds by threatening to snipe him.Danny: ♪Because we must follow the guiding light/ of the North Star/ even though it screwed us over a bunch of times/ What's your problem?/ Go fuck yourself, star!♪
- The recap of the first part.
- Part 3:
- The recap again.
- Hellfire Ragnarok, the Stallion of Satan. It's a pony.
- Ninja Brian's attempt to defeat the barbarian with "the most beautiful Haiku ever written":Puppies and kitties
Making love in the warm sunshine
So sweet, yet so hot
- And when that fails:Danny: Nice Haiku, Ninja Brian. That middle line had eight syllables. Dick.
- Ninja Brian uses his piccolo to summon their forest friend, Beary Manilow. Danny begins asking if they can use his tracking skills to help find the chalice...and then Ninja Brian throws him against the cliff, revealing a magical door to the chalice chamber.
- Part 4
- 'Now Danny can finally shave and cut that stupid hair.'
- Danny sends an apology card to the North Star for telling it to go fuck itself.
- Cutting back to the bedroom, Danny knocks over the chalice, and it sounds blatantly plastic when it hits the floor. Kristen then leans down and finds a book on the floor called 'How To Get Blowjobs By Lying About Ancient Artifacts'.
- Danny chases Kristen outside in nothing but a silk robe and his underwear. When the park rangers find them, Ninja Brian attempts to use a smoke bomb to escape...it fails.Danny: Plan B!
Park Ranger: Where the fuck they go?
- Part 1:
- 20 Haikus in 20 Days, a collection of poetry covering topics from 'I Know Kung Fu. Not Really' to 'There's a Chance I've Been Stood Up for New Year's Eve' to 'Being Too Honest With Your Holiday House Guests.'
- The announcement video for their fanfiction contest. Danny and Brian sitting in a hot tub, reading sexy haikus: that's all you need to know.
- The blooper reel. Notable moments include the Danny dummy being torn in half by a car and Danny's erection from No Reason Boner knocking a sandwich clean out of a girl's hands.
- Happy holidays from Ninja Sex Party. Danny's a little bit...inebriated.
Live Shows and Other
- The fact that Brian, the happily married dad with a PhD in physics, and whose stage persona is the stoic, silent ninja, is the one who usually writes the gleefully over-the-top songs about buttsex and boobs, while Danny, who plays a constantly horny-but-clueless Lothario that struts around in his underwear, tends to write the more fantasy-themed ones.
- From their live show in Chicago, Danny ended up Corpsing during a performance of "Dinosaur Laser Fight" due to one attendee in the first row taking a note from Ninja Brian's book and not only refusing to cheer, but staring stoicly and flipping Danny off.
- The band received, during their live show in Chicago, more thrown bras and other articles of clothing than they'd seen previously during their other shows. The first one had written on it "P.S. I'm a dude." Danny then joked about the fact that his parents, attending the show that night, were there to witness the historic moment.
- The live performances of If We Were Gay where Brian knocks out Danny with a blowdart and then proceeds to shoot Tupperware Remix Party one by one.