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Funny / My Abominable Monster Classmates Can't Be This Cute!

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Despite all the dark elements of Grimm Academy and their purpose of subverting human civilization on Remnant, this fic does have its fair share of moments where you can't help but chuckle.

  • Cinder's horror at realizing she needs to give Weiss The Talk. She promptly decides to pass the hot potato down the totem pole and orders Emerald and Mercury to do it.
  • Weiss' Pregnancy Scare. Due to her Miss Conception status, Weiss thinks she's pregnant with Jaune's child and starts to build a nest while waiting for the Delivery Snipe to arrive (Makes Just as Much Sense in Context) and behaves fiercely protective of it. Jaune very awkwardly has to explain her that she can't get pregnant from oral sex.
  • Chapter 23: Blake meets Sun. No matter what Blake does to get under Sun's skin, he unknowingly denies her any satisfaction, leaving Blake horrified at Sun's demeanor.
    • Jaune trying to explain away Blake's behavior:
      Sun: I... kinda get the feeling she doesn't like me.
      Jaune: Oh don't read too much into that. She's just playing hard to get. She's, uh, really, really goth.
      Blake: Jaune, I will hollow out your skull and use it as a drinking chalice to wash down your entrails.
      Jaune: [forced laugh] You see? Look at that terrible, dark poetry. Goth as goth can be.
    • Jaune takes this moment to gloat over Blake at finding a way to get back at her for all the trouble she caused him. Alas it was not to last:
      Blake: [snarls] I will make you suffer for this.
      Jaune: Not so funny when you're on the receiving end, is it?
      Blake: [face twitches in annoyance until shifting into something more ineffable] My innocent little fly has started spinning webs of his own. I find this... strangely arousing.
      Jaune: [sighs] Of course you do.
  • Know-Nothing Know-It-All Lovable Sex Maniac Weiss meets straitlaced Stern Teacher Glynda Goodwitch. Hilarity Ensues like you wouldn't believe it.
    • Weiss goes to Beacon's famous library and very politely asks Glynda where their "pornography documentaries" are shelved. The teacher goes into Tranquil Fury and tells her to follow her to her office, making Weiss wonder aloud if that's where the porn is stored or whether they're "living one in this very moment", naturally making Glynda even angrier.
    • Glynda completely fails to make Weiss understand she did anything wrong and decides to pass the problem to Ozpin. Weiss again misreads the situation and drops this gem of a line:
      Weiss: I'm flattered you wish to engage in fornication with me, Headmaster Ozpin. However, I already have a m- partner. I have not been a naughty student who needs to be spanked, nor do I wish to exchange a favor with you so that I may improve my grades.
    • The above makes Glynda so furious that she instinctively goes for her weapon. Weiss notices the teacher's hand on her riding crop and again applies porn logic to it:
      Weiss: Or perhaps it is Miss Goodwitch here who intends to punish me while I am busy servicing you? Regardless, I am simply not interested. Jaune is my one and only partner, and though you may possess experience which would teach me more on the subject of intimacy, I must ask that this scenario end before it goes any further.
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    • This exchange:
      Glynda: [to Ozpin] For now, however, what do you intend to do about this girl and her mouth?
      Weiss: My mouth is for Jaune only!
      Glynda And her inappropriate language!
    • Glynda's eyes almost pop out of their orbits when Weiss casually mentions her Pregnancy Scare.
    • Weiss' mix of impeccable manners and utterly shameless Lovable Sex Maniac talk actually gets her out of trouble in a hilariously unwitting example of Refuge in Audacity. Glynda is just too angry and tired to keep dealing with Weiss' antics and Ozpin wisely decides against interacting too much with the girl and instead just strongly advices her to keep private matters private. Weiss of course has no idea of this and keeps pushing her luck:
      Weiss: Speaking of which, does Beacon Academy happen to possess beds large enough for three people?
      Glynda: [gets a Eye Twitch at the obvious implication of just why Weiss would ask that]
      Ozpin: I'm afraid not. You must make do with the beds that the school provides.
      Weiss: [sighs in disappointment] Oh well. It simply means tighter cuddling, I suppose.
  • Weiss's alias at Beacon is Wren, pronounced the same way as Ren. Hilarity Ensues when the two start running in the same social circles.


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